


As I’ll Be Loving You Always

by JenT4



Category: ER, Luby - Fandom, Luka Kovac/Abby Lockhart - Fandom
Genre: Alcoholism, Communication, Discussion of Abortion, ER life, F/M, Little bit of Fluff, Little bit of angst, Little bit of sex, Medicine, PTSD, There will be sex, Working it Out, daily lives, not graphic, still sex
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2018-11-12
Updated: 2019-07-26
Packaged: 2019-08-22 11:32:24
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 45
Words: 91,546
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/16597073
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/JenT4/pseuds/JenT4
Summary: Abby and Luka have moved to Boston and are getting their lives back together. They make the decision to really move forward by learning to talk to each other better. There will be couples therapy, talking on their own, etc. Also fluff, daily lives, moments in each of their work places etc. Hoping to do what the show failed at, IMO (though I loved their ending). In order to live happily ever after, they need to put in the work.





	1. Chapter 1

**Author's Note:**

> Disclaimer: These characters do not belong to me. They belong to the amazing writers and creators of ER. I’m just gonna play with them for awhile. Also, there will be spoilers from the show. So if you haven’t watched all of it, you may want to hold off. Also, very small details such as timing and the fates of other characters, may be tweaked a bit. This story will mostly be canon-accurate, but sometimes I didn’t like what the writers did, so I changed it. :) 
> 
> The M rating is for some sex (okay, maybe a lot), as well as language (Abby and Luka might have potty mouths) and discussions of alcoholism, PTSD and abortion. 
> 
> This fic has been in my head since Abby and Luka left the show, over ten years ago. I decided to finally get it out of my head and down on metaphorical paper. 
> 
> A million thanks to Katie and Min for the betaing. You are the absolute best! Also huge thanks to Kateera for being my biggest cheerleader and encourager in this endeavor. You rock, babe! 
> 
> The title is a song from Stevie Wonder. Because Abby loves Stevie, and Luka loves Abby. 
> 
> It’s been a long time since I’ve written anything, so reviews, thoughts, etc. are encouraged. 
> 
> Enjoy!

It had been almost three weeks since the move to Boston. Seventeen days of settling into a new house in the suburbs, and God, wasn’t that a culture shock? Starting new jobs, and getting Joe settled into a new routine. Driving away from Chicago and County General had been one of the hardest things either one of them had ever done, but they both knew it was the right choice for their family. 

Abby walked into the house after a twelve hour shift with nothing on her mind but food and the oblivion of sleep. She dropped her bag in the foyer and tossed her keys on the little table they kept there. “Luka?” She called out. When she didn’t get an answer, she headed toward the living room. Abby stopped and smiled at the scene she found. Her husband and son, snuggled together on the couch with a soccer game playing on the television. Both of them were sound asleep and snoring. Joe, very lightly, and Luka in his normal loud tones. 

Abby bends over the couch to scoop up Joe. As he groans and settles on her shoulder, she rubs his back. She glances down to see Luka’s eyes on her. He gives her his slow, sweet smile. “Hey. How was your shift?” 

“Good. Glad it’s over.” She keeps her voice in a hushed whisper so she doesn’t wake their boy. “I’m going to take him up to bed and then find something to eat. I’m starving.” Luka nods and closes his eyes again. Rolling her own, Abby strides toward the stairs. “Be right back.”

She takes Joe into his bedroom, complete with his brand-new “big boy” bed. Abby feels a little pang in her chest at the thought that Joe is growing up so fast. She lays him down and rubs his back until he settles. 

As she heads back down toward the kitchen, Abby hears pans rattling. Curious, she heads in to find her husband slathering butter on bread, with a package of cheese and a can of soup on the counter. “What are you doing?”

Luka turns and grins at her. “Making you dinner. Sit down.” He doesn’t have to tell her twice, as she pulls out a chair at the table and collapses into it. “How was your day?” She asks him. 

“Fine. It’s just weird not working with you any longer.” Abby smiles at him and watches as he drops her sandwich into a frying pan and dumps the can of soup into a sauce pan, adds milk, and stirs. They had made the decision that it would be good for them to work at separate hospitals. She at Mass General, and he at Boston Med. They both had stuck with emergency medicine, but Luka had chosen BM because of its status as a safety-net hospital. Still trying to save the world, she muses.

“Yeah. I’m still getting used to not being able to talk to you all day. It kinda sucks.” She gives a little laugh. “So, how do I rate grilled cheese and tomato soup?” 

Luka flips the sandwich in the pan and gives the soup a stir. Lowering the flame on each, he steps over and kisses the top of her head. “Because I love you.” 

Abby can’t help it, her heart simply melts. She smiles as he turns back to the stove. How close they had come to almost losing this. Losing each other. It still terrifies her that she could have destroyed the most important thing in her life by relapsing. Luka is no saint, but she knows damn well that this time, they might not have come back. But due to his forgiving nature, and the fact that he understood that he had made mistakes of his own, they had managed to move forward. Things weren’t perfect, but then again, with them, things never were. The fact that they loved each other to the point of stupidity, and that both were committed to keeping their family together, helped to smooth out the rough edges. 

Abby waits as Luka scoops her sandwich onto a plate, and ladles the soup into a bowl. He looks so cute, playing Mr. Domestic. She grins at him. “Thanks. I guess I love you too.”

Luka drops into a chair at the table with her. “I know.” He watches as she eats. He knows how she gets when she’s busy or stressed, and is well aware that she would live on Pop-Tarts and caffeine if left to her own devices. “I heard from Morris today.”

Abby looks up, and he can see surprise and curiosity in her eyes. “Really? What’s going on?”

“They’re talking about starting a scholarship in Greg’s name. One that would help low-income kids from tough situations pursue medicine. He wondered if I had any thoughts on it.”

Abby reaches over and closes her fingers over his. They both would forever remember that day as bittersweet. It had been their anniversary, and the day that they decided to be together again. But they had both lost a friend, a really good friend. “And did you?” She asks. 

Luka is silent for a moment. “Just that I think it’s a really good idea. Pratt would have liked it, I think. I told Archie we’d help in any way that we could.”

“Of course we will.” Abby smiles at him and Luka feels a little of the weight lift from his chest. “Guess we can’t get away from County after all, huh?”

Luka laughs and rises to clear her dishes. He rinses them both and sets them in the dishwasher. “So. Still tired?” He gives Abby his lopsided grin.

She laughs, and stands up. “Strangely, no.”

“Good. Because I have plans. Very important plans for you.” He slips his arms around her waist and draws her close. Luka feels her heart begin to race and the shiver that runs along her skin when he nuzzles at her ear. 

“Luka…”

“What?” He continues nibbling his way to her mouth. He tips her head back and smiles into her blurry eyes. “Did you need something?” He kisses her softly. The miracle of holding her again like this, touching her again, is not lost on him.

“No. Well, I guess I do.”

Luka draws back and waits, looking at her intently. Wondering at just how desperately he wants her in that moment. “What?” He asks again.

Abby lets out a sigh and holds out her hand. “You, I just need you.”


	2. As I’ll Be Loving You Always

Abby cracks one eye open when she smells coffee. She turns her head to find Luka, sitting on his side of the bed and leaning toward her with a mug. She manages to sit up. “Is that for me?”

Luka grins at her. “I don’t know. Is it?” He holds the mug out of her reach and taps his own lips. “Pay me, and it’s yours.”

Abby rolls her eyes, but leans over to give him a quick peck on his mouth. “I thought I paid you in full, with interest, last night?” She takes a long sip of the sweet caffeine, doctored just the way she likes it.

His grin flashes at her again. “That was for all of the other times I’ve brought you coffee.” Luka stands and walks to his closet, pulling out a suit. “What time do you have to be in?”

“Ten. I’ve got some time.” She settles back against the pillows with her coffee. “This long shift/short shift thing is bizarre to get used to.”

He glances over as he dresses. “I imagine it will take awhile to get used to. But it works for us this way.” Luka pulls shoes out of the rack. “Want breakfast?”

Abby nods and smiles. “Dinner last night, coffee in bed, and now you’re offering breakfast?” She considers him. “Did you do something? Like, commit a felony?”

Luka laughs and heads toward the hall. “I must still love you. Joe’s up.”

Abby sighs and finishes her coffee. She hauls herself out of the bed to head across the hall and get her son. She finds him standing behind the baby gate that they keep across the doorway to his room. He lifts his arms and gives her a pitiful look. “Ma!” She picks him up and kisses his forehead.

“Morning, Joe. Are you hungry?” He lays his head on her shoulder and nods. “Okay. Tata’s making breakfast. Should we go and see?”

Joe lifts his head and gives her a solemn look. “Tata make toast?”

“I don’t know. Let’s go see, okay?”

Luka turns from the stove with a spatula in his hand, wearing an apron over his shirtsleeves. He smiles at Abby and Joe. “Good morning, Joe. Did you sleep well in your new bed?” Joe reaches his arms out to his father who takes him and gives him a kiss on the head before settling him into his high chair.

“Like bed. Toast?”

Luka shakes his head. “Sure. We have toast, eggs, and bacon.” He’s not sure exactly where the toast obsession came from, but Joe has asked for it every day for the past week.

Abby watches as Luka scoops the food onto plates and sets them on the table. He goes to the refrigerator and pulls out ketchup and orange juice. When he returns, she gives him a look while dumping ketchup on her eggs. “Seriously. Did you rob a bank?”

Luka sighs. “No, Abby. I didn’t rob a bank. I’m just trying to do some nice things for you.”

It hits her then. Luka hadn’t been around very much in the past year. He had been in Croatia for almost six months. When he’d finally come back, Abby has been deep into her relapse and pushing him away at every turn. Then she had been in rehab. He had moved out of their home for a month so he could figure things out. They had been married for over a year, but had spent a grand total of three months living together as husband and wife. He was feeling guilty and trying to make up for all of it.

Abby clamps down on her own guilt and reaches out a hand to cover his. “Luka. You don’t have to do all of this.”

He squeezes her hand. “Yes, Abby. I do. I know you think that everything that happened last year is your fault. But it’s not. A lot of it is on me. I want us to get back to the place we were in before it all fell apart. I don’t want that to ever happen again.” Luka pauses when Joe tosses his spoon on the floor. He picks it up and wipes it clean before handing it back. “Don’t throw your spoon.” Luka admonishes him. Joe grins at his father and scoops up more eggs.

Abby watches as Luka brings his gaze back to hers. “Luka, I don’t want to be back in that place.”

His brow furrows and he frowns at her. “What do you mean?”

“I mean that I want us to move forward. I want us to be stronger. We can’t forget how close we came to losing each other.”

Luka takes her hand again. “We won’t.”

“Luka, we have to really work at it this time. We’ve been through so much together. But we can’t go back to that place that we didn’t really talk to each other. We were happy. We are happy. But we’re terrible at communicating with each other when it comes to the really important things.”

Luka gives her a little smile. “Yeah, I’ve heard that one before.”

Abby stands and walks around the table to drop into his lap. “I know you have. And I know why it’s hard for you. It’s hard for me too. That’s why we have to work on it.”

He tightens his grip on her waist and kisses her forehead. “I know.” Luka gives a sigh. “Should we think about therapy?”

Abby pulls back, stunned. If he’d told her that he was living a secret life as an agent for the CIA, she’d have been less shocked. “Seriously? You would do that?”

Luka looks intently into her eyes. Those deep brown eyes that he never failed to drown in. He’d known her for nine years, and he didn’t think he’d ever stop the fall. “Yeah. Yeah, I think I want to. You’re right. We need to work through the hard stuff so there’s nothing left standing in our way.”

Abby leans forward to touch her forehead to his. “Then let’s do it.”


	3. As I’ll Be Loving You Always

Abby drops Joe at daycare on her way in to work. He seems to enjoy the place they had picked. He came home each day full of stories about his friend Kenny. Abby and Luka had gone to an open-house to meet the other parents and the providers. They had all seemed normal and sane. But you never know, so she worries as usual while driving away.

She’s barely through the door when the ER chief hails her. “Lockhart! Trauma coming in. Want it?”

“Sure. Let me put my stuff away.” Abby heads to the lounge and stores her bag. She grabs her coat and shrugs into it. Her chief, Michaels, comes in behind her. “So what’s the trauma?” She pulls her stethoscope out and drops it around her neck.

“GSW. I thought you’d like a taste of home.” She grins at Abby.

Abby grins back. “Yeah, we sure don’t have as many of those here as we did on the south side of Chicago. This will be a nice walk down memory lane.”

“Good. Enjoy. Two minutes out. I’ll be in here reviewing applications for attendings if you need me.”

Abby gives a nod and a wave and heads toward the bay. It’s not so different than the one at County. She’s pretty sure they all mostly look the same. The ambulance screams in and the paramedics off-load a young female.

“Karen Foster, 22. Caught a bullet in the chest while interrupting a convenience store robbery.” Abby grabs one side of the gurney and starts walking fast toward the door with them. “Pulse 42, BP 90/50. Airway’s fine. No LOC.”

“Karen can you hear me?” Karen opens terrified eyes and nods. “Good. We’re going to fix you up, okay?” Abby steers them into Trauma One. “On my count, one, two.” On three, the paramedics help her lift Karen to the trauma bed.

An hour later, Karen is up in surgery. It had been dicey a few times, but she’d pulled through it. She had a very good chance of making it through surgery. Abby walks to the lounge for a hit of coffee.

Michaels glances up. “The trauma?”

“She’ll be okay. She needed six units, since she was bleeding into her chest, but we managed to get access and seal it off. Hawthorn says she should do fine.”

Michaels nods. “Good. Grab some coffee. Take a load off for a minute.”

“I’m not gonna argue with that.” Abby pours herself a cup of the sludge that passes for coffee in every doctors lounge in the world. She wonders that she’s actually acquired a taste for it. “So.”

“So.” Michaels studies Abby for a minute. “You’ve been with us a little under two weeks. I wanted to tell you that I couldn’t be happier with your work and the way you’re fitting in with the other staff.”

Abby feels a quick surge of pride. Working as an attending, in a new hospital, without Luka for a safety net, had terrified her. “Thanks. I like it here. I wasn’t sure I would.”

Michaels gives her a nod and a smile. “Good. You’re great with the students and residents, and the nurses already love you.”

Abby laughs a little. “It helps that I used to be one, so I don’t talk down to them like they’re idiots.”

Michaels laughs. “True enough. How’s your husband doing at BM?”

“He likes it. He had been out of emergency medicine for awhile, so it was an easier transition for him than it was for me.”

Michaels furrows her brow. “How so? Seems like he’d be rusty, while you literally had a five day break.”

Abby grins at her. “Luka’s never rusty. The man has more energy than a troupe of dancing girls. And he absorbs a medical journal before I can finish the first article. Even with the language barrier.” Abby sighs a little. “I just mean it was an easier transition because he didn’t go straight from working with people that he’d worked with for almost a decade, to an entirely different pool. He’s used to moving around, I’m not.”

Michaels nods. “He sounds like a good man.”

Abby laughs. “The best. And well, he’s hot.”

As her boss doubles over in laughter, Abby rests an arm on the table. She bumps the stack of applications and her eyes land on the name on the top one. “Jake Scanlon?”

Michaels looks up and meets her eyes. “Yeah. R4 at UCSF. Looking for attending positions in the spring. Medical school at…” She glances down at the page. “Northwestern. You know him?”

Abby feels a quick surge of panic, but she has no idea why. Things with Jake hadn’t ended well, but it had been nearly four years. Surely he had moved on by now. “You could say that.”

Michaels puts her serious face on. “Were you involved with him?”

Abby shakes her head. “Yeah. But it was a long time ago, and that shouldn’t deter you from at least giving him an interview. He’s good. Really smart and quick. Laid back, so he should fit in fine.”

“Abby, if it’s going to be a problem, I don’t have to give him an interview.”

“No, seriously. No problem. Set up the interview. He’s great. Well, back to work.” Abby dumps her empty cup in the sink and hurries out.

The rest of the day is slow, which gives her time to catch up on charts and let her mind wander. She would have to tell Luka. Of course she would. She just couldn’t be sure what his reaction would be. Just a year ago, it would be laughter at her reaction, but now? They had begun to rebuild the trust between them, but she still worried about doing anything that could make him doubt her. She started to get a little annoyed. What did he have to doubt her over? She had dumped Jake. It was four years ago, and it’s not like he’d been celibate at the time. He’d been living with another woman for Christ’s sake. She caught herself before she went into one of her “snits” as Luka called them. “Stop it Abby. Give the man a chance.” She muttered to herself.

“Talking to yourself is a sign of insanity, you know.” Abby glances over to see one of the nurses, Sophie, grinning at her. “Isn’t your shift over?”

Abby glances at her watch. “Shit. Yeah, twenty minutes ago, and I have an appointment.” It wasn’t actually an appointment, it was an AA meeting, but Sophie didn’t need to know that. She’d been trying to make a meeting after work on her short days when she could. And Luka was picking up Joe. “I gotta go. See you tomorrow.”

Sophie gives a wave as Abby heads into the lounge to gather her things. Shrugging into her coat, she pulled out her phone and dialed Luka. She wasn’t surprised when it went to voicemail. He still had an hour left on his shift. “Hey, it’s me. I’m going to hit a meeting and then I’ll be home. A couple of hours. See you then, love you.”

Abby has been trying to let Luka know where she would be at all times, even if it was just a quick text, and she was only a few minutes late. Just a small way to let him know that she knows he still worries and to give him piece of mind.

The theme of the meeting was gratitude, which Abby had in abundance for so many things. After her meeting, she walked out to her car and just sat without turning on the ignition. She drops her head back on the seat and rolls her eyes. “Get over yourself.” She yanks the phone out of her bag as she starts the car and pulls away from the club. The number is a speed dial, and she puts the hands free option on.

“Abby?”

The smile in Susan’s voice is all Abby needs to settle herself down. “Hey. I figured I owed you a call. How’s it going?”

“Great. Any better and I’d be illegal. Cosmo started school.”

Abby feels a little jolt at the idea that Cosmo was in school already. “That’s great. Is he liking it? How’s Chuck?”

“He loves it. And Chuck is Chuck. Still more maternal than I am.” She gives a happy chuckle. “How are Joe and Luka?”

“They’re fantastic. We’re all trying to get used to our routine here, but so far, so good.”

“That’s good to hear. Chuck and I were just talking about taking a trip out East. I’ve never been to Boston.”

“That’d be great. We’ll have the guest room ready for you.” Abby sighs. “Listen, I know it’s crappy to call out of the blue to dump on you, but you were there, and you might be able to talk me down.”

“Abby, shut up. You know you can call me anytime, for anything. What’s going on?”

“Jake applied for an attending position at Mass Gen.”

There is a beat of silence. “And?”

“And? Seriously? You’re no help.”

Susan laughs. “Help with what? Are you worried about working with him? Luka’s reaction?”

Abby rolls her eyes. “A little of both. I know it’s completely stupid and irrational, but it’s there.”

“Okay. I can see that.” Susan pauses. “Look. I know you and Jake didn’t end on the best terms, but it’s been what? Four years? I’m sure he’s over you.” She listens to Abby’s sigh. “As for Luka, why are you worried about that? He was living with Sam at the time you were involved with Jake.”

“I know. I fucking know all of that. Susan, I hurt him so badly last year. I just don’t want to do that again.”

Abby pulls into the driveway and parks. “I’m just being stupid.”

“Yeah, you are.” Susan laughs. “Abby, Luka loves you. He’s already forgiven you, and he loves you more than life. It will be fine. As for working with Jake, don’t be stupid.”

“Thanks. Seriously. I guess I just needed a patented scolding by Susan. Call me soon and we’ll firm up plans for a visit.”

“I will. Abby, it will be fine. Talk to you soon.”

“Thanks. Bye.”

Abby tosses the phone in her purse and sits and stares at the house. Luka’s car is in the driveway, so he’s home. “Time to suck it up.”

She gets out of the car and walks in the house.


	4. As I’ll Be Loving You Always

Abby finds Luka at the kitchen table, flipping through a magazine, with something on the stove behind him smelling like glory. She walks over as he glances up and smiles at her. She bends to press a kiss to the top of his head. “Hey. What’s for dinner?”

“Lamb stew. It seemed like a good night for it. It’s getting chilly out.” Luka watches her as she goes to the stove to lift the lid on the pot and sniff. He waits while she bends to greet Joe who is playing with his trucks on the floor. She has trouble in her eyes, and he wonders how long it will take her to tell him about it. “How was your meeting?”

“It was good. I talked to Susan on the way home. She wants to bring Chuck and Cosmo out for a visit.” She glances down at what he was reading. “Is that my catalog?”

Luka grins at her. “Maybe. You needed some new lingerie, right?”

Abby picks up the Victoria’s Secret mailer and swats him with it. She would never understand the male psyche. What was the point in trying? “And with your son in the room?” She glances down at Joe.

Luka laughs. “Hey. Got to teach him early to appreciate God’s work.” He laughs again as Abby rolls her eyes. “Anyways, it will be nice to see Susan and Chuck. What’s wrong?”

Abby raises her eyes to his, startled. “I forget how easily you read my mind.” She murmurs.

Luka reaches for her hand. “That’s a good thing, yeah?”

“Yeah. Most of the time.” Abby takes a breath. “Luka. Jake Scanlon is applying for an attending position at Mass General.”

He just stares at her, a bemused expression on his face. “Okay. Is that a problem for you?”

“No. Well, a little. We didn’t exactly end things on a good note, you know? But mostly I’m worried about what you think about it.”

Luka is momentarily baffled. Abby had been semi-serious with Jake, but he’d been with Sam at the time. He just didn’t understand….wait. Of course he understood. “Abby.” He reaches out to take her hand and gives her a tender look and a smile, hoping to ease her mind. “I’m not worried about you working with an old boyfriend.”

Abby’s breath hitches as she lets it out. “Are you sure? I mean, I broke up with him. It’s been a long time. But…”

Luka brings her hand to his lips. “I’m sure. Abby, I don’t doubt you at all when it comes to fidelity. I know what happened was...well, it happened. But I also know that you didn’t have any control over yourself at that point. I forgave you months ago, and I really do understand why it happened.”

Abby feels tears gather in her eyes. “But, I hurt you so much…”

“I hurt you too. And I think you hurt yourself more than me. Abby, you are one of the most intensely loyal people I’ve ever known. And that’s leaving out the fact that I know you love me, and would never cheat on me while you’re in your right mind. So put that away. You need to stop dwelling on it. I don’t worry about that issue at all.”

Abby lets the tears fall. “I guess we’re better at this talking thing than we thought.”

Luka gives a little laugh. “Yeah, I guess we are. So to ease your mind, no. I’m not worried at all about you working with Jake. For Christ’s sake, we both worked with my ex for years.”

Abby laughs as he stands to go to the stove. “Yeah, but I was there to stake my territory and give her threatening glances if she tried anything funny.” She rises and walks over to put her arms around his waist and hug herself to his back. “Thanks.”

“You’re welcome.” Luka considers her. “Would you have taken Sam on in a fight over me?”

Abby narrows her eyes. “You bet your ass. I could take her.”

“I don’t know. Sam is pretty scrappy.” He laughs as she swats his butt. “Get Joe. Dinner’s ready.”

Luka ladles stew into bowls as Abby settles Joe in his high chair. She smiles at him as they settle down to eat. “Thanks for making dinner again.”

“Well, you have other domestic strengths.” Luka laughs when she sticks her tongue out at him. “So what else is new?”

“Cosmo started school.” Abby tells him.

Luka looks stunned and drops his spoon in the bowl. “Shit. Is he old enough for that already?”

Pleased that he’s having the same reaction she’d had, Abby grins. “He’s almost five. So yeah, he’s old enough.”

“Wow. That’s….wow.” Luka grins again. “I guess time runs, huh?”

“Flies. Time flies, Luka.” She studies him as she takes another bite of truly delicious stew. “Do you do that on purpose?”

He gives her an innocent look. “What?” He can’t hold the smile in when she just stares at him. “Maybe. Sometimes. I know you like correcting me. I’m just trying to make you happy.”

She snickers at that. “Sure. That’s why you do it.”

Luka laughs as he stands to clear his bowl. “Are you done, Joe?”

Joe grins at his father. “Good.”

“Thank you. Do you want more?”

“Brown milk.”

Luka glances at Abby. “What?”

“He wants chocolate milk, Luka.”

“Okay. You can have some milk, and then it’s time for your bath.”

Joe scowls at Luka. “No bath. Play.”

Luka sets his sippy cup in front of him. “Nope. Bath, then bed. You already played.”

Joe gives a beleaguered sigh. “Okay.”

Luka gives Abby a “we’re nailing this parenting thing” grin. She chuckles. “Want Tata to give you your bath?”

“Bath. Then book.”

Abby nods. “Okay.” She glances at Luka. “If you want to handle bedtime, I can clean up here.”

Luka nods as he scoops his son out of his chair. “Say goodnight to mama, Joe.”

Abby leans over to kiss Joe and ruffle his hair. “‘Night, buddy.”

Joe settles his head on Luka’s shoulder and gives her a grin nearly identical to his father’s lopsided one. “Night, mama.”

Abby clears the dishes and puts the rest of the food away. She hears Joe’s maniacal laughter coming from upstairs as she washes the dishes, and knows they’re into the “splash daddy” portion of the program. She grins and goes out to settle herself on the couch and wait for Luka.

She’s still amazed at his attitude. She had worked herself up into a ball of anxiety for no reason. Then again, she had a reason. But as usual, Luka surprised her. They still had a lot of things to work through, but they were getting back what they’d lost. She had more hope than ever that they were going to be better for all of the pain they had gone through in the first year of their marriage.

Abby turns her head as Luka comes in and drops down next to her on the couch. “He got you good, huh?” Nodding at his wet shirt.

Luka’s eyes are already closed and he smiles. “Good thing I didn’t have my tie on. That thing was expensive.”

Abby feels his hand reach over and link his long fingers with hers. He looks content and relaxed. She decides she needs to change the relaxed part for a little while. “Is he asleep?” When Luka nods, Abby rolls and straddles his lap. “Then we should probably get you out of this wet shirt. I wouldn’t want you to catch a chill.”

Luka opens his eyes as her fingers go to work on the buttons. Her eyes are playful, and she’s grinning at him. He grins back. “By all means. We’re medical professionals. We need to set a good example.” He lifts his hands to twine into her hair as she leans down to take his mouth. Luka marvels as always at the taste of her. Of Abby. The first time she had really kissed him, all those years ago, it had been like something waking up inside of him. He had been so lost, but with her, he was found again. Luka slides his hands down to her face to take the kiss deeper. He opens his eyes and watches her lashes flutter. “Abby…” he murmurs.

She opens blurry eyes and watches him as she peels the shirt off. “There. How about I warm you up? Let’s go upstairs…”

She barely has the words out before he rolls, quick as a snake and reverses their positions. “Oh, no. We’re going to stay right here.” He lowers his mouth to her neck and breathes her in. “You started this.” Luka slides her shirt over her head and kisses his way down her throat. “I love the feel of you..”

Abby wraps her arms around him and lets her body feel. Luka. Her husband. The man she had been in love with for almost a decade. He was right there with her, kissing and caressing her. She groans as he slides her pants down her hips and kisses her thigh.

Luka feels her hands tighten in his hair. He smiles against the inside of her knee, and looks up at her. Her eyes are closed and she’s completely lost in sensation. In them. He slides his way up her body as he rids himself of the rest of his clothes. He’s already hard, and desperate for her. “Abby. Abby look at me.” He says in a harsh whisper.

Her eyes flutter open and she sees the intense look in his eyes. She lifts her hands to his face and pulls his head down to take his mouth again. “I want you, Luka. Now.”

He slides inside her and they fall into a rhythm that’s uniquely theirs, yet always different. She wraps her legs around his waist to take him deeper, He lifts his head and watches her as he thrusts, slowly at first, but stronger as the need builds. When he feels her let go, he follows her over.

Luka drops his weight on her and groans. “Wow.”

Abby wraps her arms around him and chuckles against his hair. “Yeah. That was...nice.” She smiles down at him when he lifts his head to grin at her. “Luka?”

“Hmm?”

“Let’s go upstairs.”


	5. Chapter 5

Luka looks up from the admit desk where he’s working on charting to see a full waiting room. He glances over at his chief “Hey, how many rooms are open?”

Daniels gives him a grim smile. “None. It’s going to be a long one. And we’ve got two nurses out with the flu.” He rolls his eyes.

Luka smiles. “That’s nothing. Did you have Amy call the service?”

“Yeah. They’re sending someone. Between now and next week. Perry’s out too. He’s sleeping with one of the nurses who’s out sick. Not sure if they’re just having a holiday, or if they caught it from each other.” He frowns a little when Luka shakes his head and chuckles. “Can you stay an extra couple of hours?”

Luka nods. “Probably. My wife is picking the baby up. I’ll let you know.” Daniels nods and heads toward curtain two.

Luka continues working on his chart. He reaches over to pick up his coffee cup and take a sip. His “no caffeine” experiment had crashed and burned the minute he’d set foot in another ER. He’s used to the normal flow of bitching and gossip in any hospital. It’s just the way things work. He’s also amused that Daniels knows about Perry and Dana. Luka had just figured that he was more attuned to doctors sleeping with nurses because he’d done that a few times himself. But apparently, it was a pretty poorly kept secret.

Luka finishes his chart and heads toward the ambulance bay to find some privacy to call Abby. He’s surprised that instead of going to voicemail, she picks up on the first ring. “Hey. I figured I’d get your VM.”

“Hey yourself.” She sounds tired, and he hears her take a deep breath.

“Are you smoking?”

Luka can practically hear the blush through the phone and he grins. She had quit again after leaving rehab, but he knew she snuck one now and then. Hell, he did the same himself.

“Yeah. It’s been a rough morning. I lost one. Sixteen year old suicide.”

“I’m sorry.” He knows how touchy she is about suicides, after all of her mother’s attempts. Maggie might be doing well on her meds at the moment, but Luka knows Abby lives in fear of getting the phone call that her mother finally managed to kill herself. “Anything I can do?”

“No. It’s good to hear your voice though. Did you need something?”

Luka hesitates. He knows exactly what it means to need an attending to stay and cover. “We’ve got a doctor out with the flu, or...something. Daniels asked if I could cover.”

“Okay.”

“I’ll get out of it…”

“No. Luka, seriously. Stay and cover. I’ll get Joe and pick up some dinner on the way home. It’s no big deal.”

Luka is torn. Abby needs him home with her, but he knows how stubborn she is when she makes her mind up. “Okay. If you’re sure.”

“I’m sure. How late do you think you’ll be?”

“Just a couple of hours.”

“That’s fine. I’ll see you at home. I’d better go. Looks like a trauma coming in. Luka…”

“Yeah?”

“Nothing. I love you.”

He smiles. “Love you back. See you later.”

He closes his phone and starts heading inside, worrying now about Abby. He hated leaving her on her own when she was like this. He’d already done that too many times. When he pushes through the doors, he nearly plows over one of the younger nurses. Luka grabs her arm instinctively. “Sorry. I wasn’t watching where I was going. You okay?”

“I’m fine, Dr. Kovač.” To Luka’s surprise she blushes crimson all the way up to her hairline. “Daniels is looking for you.” She seems flustered as she pulls her arm away.

“Okay. Hey, are you alright otherwise, Allie?”

Her blush deepens. “Um, Yeah. Of course. Ah...you’d better get in there.”

Luka nods and walks toward the desk, not seeing the young woman stare after him and sigh.

He finds Daniels at the desk. “You needed me?”

“Yeah. Trauma five minutes out. Double GSW. I need you to take one of them.” Luka nods. “Were you going to be able to stay?”

“Sure. But the sooner you can get me out of here, the better.”

Daniels nods “Just get us over the hump, and you’re out of here.” He walks with Luka toward the bay. “Take Gorsh on this one, will you? He could use the experience with you.”

As Gorsh reminds Luka a little of a young Greg Pratt, he’s happy to have him. “Definitely.”

They work the trauma like a well-oiled team, and Luka is reminded of County. It’s nice to slide so seamlessly into another unit. As their patient is wheeled out of trauma and up to surgery, Luka nods. “Nice work, everyone.” He notes that Allie blushes again before she hurries out.

Gorsh laughs and shakes his head. “She’s got it bad, that one.”

Luka’s pulling off his gown when he notes that Gorsh is talking to him. “What?”

“Shit, man. Are you blind? Girl wants you.”

Luka is surprised, and shakes his head. “I’m married. And way too old for her.”

“You think that matters?”

Luka grins at him. “It does to me. She’ll get over it.”

Gorsh snorts out a laugh. “If you say so.”

Luka shakes his head and walks out of the room. Great. Just what he needs. He was generally entirely oblivious when a woman was attracted to him. A fact that amuses the hell out of Abby, and had gotten him in trouble with certain other women in his life. He rolls his eyes thinking of Sam’s tantrum over Neela’s harmless crush on him. Luka decides to just let it go. He’d be kind to Allie and treat her as a colleague. She’d get over it soon enough.

The rest of the afternoon is spent clearing the board. No more traumas to back everything up further. A half an hour before he’s due to leave, Daniels lays a hand on his back. “Go home, Luka. We’ve got it from here.”

“Are you sure?”

“Yup. Board’s almost clear, and the waiting room’s down to manageable. Thanks for staying.”

Luka nods. “No problem.” He’s relieved to be going home earlier than he’d thought. He heads to the lounge and puts his coat and steth away. He pulls out his jacket and shrugs into it, and walks out the door to go home to his wife and his boy.


	6. Chapter 6

Abby walks into the house with a crabby Joe in one arm and a bag of Chinese takeout and the rest of her gear in the other. She drops her purse in the foyer, tosses her keys on the table and strides straight back to the kitchen. “Okay, Joe. I can hear you. No need to scream my ears off.” She dumps the Chinese on the table.

 

Abby shifts Joe and looks him in the face. It’s red from crying and he’s rubbing his ear. Great, she sighs. Probably an ear infection. “Not feeling good, huh? Want to play with your trucks?”

 

Joe gives a pitiful sniffle and nods. Abby kisses him on the head, notes that he feels a bit warm, and puts him down near the corner where they keep his toys. She straightens and heads to the table to unpack the Chinese. She just stops and drops into a chair. Jesus, it had been a day. She has a fleeting thought that a glass of wine sounds great. She shuts that thought down immediately. “No First Drink”, she repeats in her head. It passes quickly, but it shakes her a bit to have her first craving in months. Abby lays her head down on her arms at the table and weeps.

 

That’s where Luka finds her, twenty minutes later. She had stopped crying, but her face is blotchy and she looks miserable. “Hey, what’s this?” He moves quickly to her side where she turns and wraps her arms around his waist, still seated, and buries her face in his stomach. “Abby. Baby, it’s okay.”

 

She nods against his shirt and tries to compose herself. “It’s just been a shitty day, that’s all.” She draws back and gives him a wobbly smile. “You’re home earlier than you thought.”

 

“Yeah. We managed to get caught up.” He strokes her hair. “Do you want to talk about it?”

 

Abby sighs. “In a little while. We should eat before this food gets cold. I think Joe has an ear infection.”

 

Luka steps over to take plates from the cupboard. “Great.” He steps over and opens cartons of takeout. Pleased that she’d gotten Mongolian Beef for him. “I’m sure that’s what capped your day off, huh?”

 

“Almost. Right after I realized he was sick, which I should have done an hour earlier, since he was screaming his head off, I thought about having a drink.”

 

Luka stills his hands and looks at her. “Are you okay?”

 

Abby sighs, and rises to get Joe and settle him in his seat. “Yes. It’s just part of the disease. But I haven’t had a craving in months. Not since you moved back home…” her breath hitches a little. “It just caught me off guard, that’s all.”

 

Luka’s eyes go dark. “You really haven’t had a craving since I moved back in?”

 

Abby’s eyes pop wide, because she knows what he’s thinking. “That’s not what I meant. None of this is your fault. I was an alcoholic before I met you Luka. Long before. Nothing you did or could have done made me pick up the bottle. Alcoholics stay sober because they need to. Not because someone else is pulling the strings.”

 

Luka nods and arranges the food on the plates. He sets Joe’s in front of him and hands him a spoon. He feels the boy’s forehead, and yes, definitely a fever. Joe gives his father a pitiful look and starts to slowly eat his food. Luka sits back down and faces Abby. “I know that. I just feel like I should have done something...more.”

 

“Luka, you couldn’t have.”

 

“I could have come back home when you asked me.” He gives her a sad smile.

 

She nods. “You could have. It wouldn’t have mattered. I need you to understand that, Luka. You didn’t cause my relapse. I did.” Abby picks up the chopsticks and digs into her almond chicken. “It’s important that you get that part, okay? Stop blaming yourself.”

 

Luka feels the weight lift a bit and nods. “Okay. Something else I need to work on.” He smiles at her. “What else happened today?”

 

“What didn’t? I lost that trauma. We had three more come in. Two MVC’s and a fall from a roof.” She pauses to take a bite. “We saved all of them, but it was just rough. Oh. And Jake made the short list for interviews. Michaels told me that just as I was walking out the door.” She rolls her eyes. “So yeah. Seriously crappy day.”

 

Luka reaches over to squeeze her hand. “What can I do?”

 

Abby shrugs. “Nothing. I’ll get over it.” She smiles at him. “How was your day?”

 

“Fine. Daniels knows about the doctor and nurse who are, how do you say it? Boffing each other.”

 

Abby laughs at that. “Okay…”

 

Luka grins at her. “I thought it wasn’t known very well. But I was wrong, I guess.”

 

“Well, you do know about boffing nurses.”

 

Luka pokes her in the arm. “Hey. I didn’t hear any complaints.”

 

“And you never will. What else happened?”

 

“Nothing much.” He shrugs. “Gorsh thinks one of the nurses has a crush on me.”

 

“The Kovač charm strikes again.” Abby says with a laugh.

 

“Hey. You could at least pretend to be jealous every once in awhile.”

 

Abby looks at him with humor dancing in her eyes. “Luka, I’ve known you for how long? Every woman who meets you gets an obligatory crush on you. And you are _always_ oblivious to it. It’s fairly adorable, honestly.”

 

He studies her. “Maybe I’m just humble, and don’t see my own worth.”

 

“In a pig’s eye.” She grins at him. “Besides. Do you really want jealousy from me? I could demand that you not be within fifty feet of this woman. Tell you not to do your job with her or teach her anything.”

 

Luka groans. “That was exactly what I thought of when I found out. I have to admit that I had a moment of panic. That was tough.” He grins back at her and takes her hand. “But then I remembered that I was married to you, not Sam, and that you would probably just laugh at me. Which you did. So thanks.” He lifts her hand and kisses it as she laughs again. “Feeling better, yeah?”

 

“Yeah.” Abby rises and takes the spoon from Joe’s hand. He had nodded off over his lo mein. “I’m going to take him up to bed and then take a shower.”

 

“Okay. I’ll be up shortly.” Luka watches her go, and marvels at all of the strength she doesn’t know she has.


	7. Chapter 7

Luka opens one eye and notes that Abby’s side of the bed is empty. It’s Saturday morning, which is usually the day that he gets up with Joe and lets her sleep in. “Abby?” His voice is rough with sleep, and he doesn’t get an answer.

 

Luka tosses the covers aside and rolls out of bed. He grabs his sweats from the back of the chair they keep in the bedroom and pulls them on. He pads out to peek into Joe’s room. Empty. Curious, he heads downstairs and finds Joe lying on the couch and watching The Wiggles. “Dobar jutro prijatelj,” he says in Croatian.

 

Joe gives him a pitiful smile. “Jutro, Tata.”

 

“Still not feeling good, huh?”

 

Joe nods.

 

“It will be better soon. Where’s mama?”

 

Joe shrugs and turns his attention back to the television.

 

Luka smiles and heads toward the kitchen where he can hear movement. He finds Abby with her back to him, stirring something on the stove. “Hey. What are you doing?”

 

“Making oatmeal.” She turns and smiles at him, lifting her face for a good morning kiss. He obliges her. “It’s the only thing I’m good at when it comes to breakfast.”

 

“I’m aware.” He laughs when she shoves him back a little. “Why are you making oatmeal on your morning to sleep in?”

 

Abby shrugs. “Couldn’t sleep, and Joe was up. You were dead to the world, so I got it. It’s no big deal.”

 

“Okay.”

 

“Luka, I think we need to take Joe in. That otitis isn’t clearing up.”

 

Luka sighs. “Abby, it’s only been a few days.”

 

“I know, I know. But his fever’s higher, and he’s miserable. I just want to make sure.”

 

Luka smiles at her. She tended to freak out when Joe was sick, and even though she knew very well that a simple ear infection was usually nothing, he understood her feelings. “Fine. Did you call his doctor?”

 

“Yeah. But we haven’t seen her yet, and since he’s a new patient, they can’t fit us in today.”

 

“Okay, so when can they?”

 

“Tuesday. I don’t want to wait that long, so I called Michaels to see if she would check him out.”

 

Luka picks up the coffee mug she sat in front of him and lifts it to his mouth to hide his grin. “You called your boss?”

 

She turns and glares at him. “Yes, okay?”

 

He laughs. “Fine, fine. You want to go after breakfast?”

 

Abby nods. “Yes. I figured we could run some other errands while we were out too.”

 

“Okay. I’ll get him ready while you finish this.”

 

Abby nods and he retreats to get Joe and get him ready to be poked and prodded.

 

***************

 

Abby knows very well that Luka thinks she’s acting like a lunatic. But she also knows that he’ll humor her because he understands the lunacy. She watches as he unbuckles Joe from his car seat and hauls him up and onto his shoulder where Joe settles his head, thumb in his mouth.

 

She walks around the car and takes Luka’s free hand as they begin walking from the staff parking lot toward the ER. “Thanks.”

 

He grins down at her. “You know this is a terrible use of ER resources, right?”

 

“Shut up.” She releases his hand and strides ahead to open the door. She lets Luka and Joe go first and then follows. She waves at Sophie who’s working the cage and she buzzes them in. “Hey, Sophie. Where’s Michaels?”

 

Sophie turns to smile at her and then her eyes land on the tall, handsome man behind Dr. Lockhart. “Uh. Um, she’s in trauma one. They should be finished soon.”

 

Abby smirks and rolls her eyes, well used to other women having this reaction to her husband. “Sophie, this is Luka, my husband; and Joe, our son.”

 

She grins while Luka extends his hand to shake Sophie’s “Nice to meet you, Sophie.”

 

Sophie continues to stare at him. “Um, likewise. Ah, you guys can wait in the lounge if you want. I’ll let Michaels know you’re here when she’s free.”

 

Abby leads Luka into the doctors lounge and laughs. “Jesus, your pheromones are strong.”

 

Luka chuckles. “You should know. You’ve fallen victim to them twice.”

 

_If you only knew, Luka._

 

Abby turns as the door opens behind her. Michaels strides in. “Don’t talk to me until I have coffee. I’m working a double.” She goes to the pot without even glancing at them and pours a cup. She turns after taking a long gulp, eyes landing on Luka. “Well, hello. You must be Dr. Kovač .” She extends her hand for a shake.

 

“Yes, Dr. Michaels. Nice to finally meet you.”

 

“Dawn. And likewise. Your wife is our new superstar.” Michaels watches as Luka raises his eyebrows and grins Abby. Abby blushes a bit. “She’s been nothing but an asset. She tells me you’re liking your job as well?”

 

“Yeah. I’m used to that population, so it’s been smooth sailing.”

 

Michaels smiles. “Indeed.” She glances at the boy in Luka’s arms. “And this must be Joe?”

 

Abby smiles. “Yes. Joe, say hello to Dr. Michaels.”

 

Joe gives her a sweet smile. “Hullo.”

 

“God, Abby, he’s gorgeous. Good DNA, huh?” She laughs when Luka shakes his head at that. “Well, let’s check him out shall we?”

 

Michaels’ diagnosis confirms a severe Otitis, and she prescribes antibiotics and Baby Tylenol PRN. Abby sends Luka ahead to settle Joe in the car, so she can deal with the paperwork. Michaels brings her the discharge paperwork, and raises her eyebrows. “So. Where did you find him, and how can I get one of my very own?”

 

Abby smiles. “Who? Joe? Under a berry bush.”

 

Michaels laughs. “It was nice to finally meet them.”

 

“Yeah. It’s been weird not working with Luka. We worked together for eight years.” She shrugs. “I’m getting used to it. Hey, did you ever check into that other thing I asked you about?”

 

Michaels hands her Joe’s paperwork, and another smaller slip of paper. “As a matter of fact. I assumed you’d want to stay away from anyone in house here, or at BM.”

 

Abby nods. “Yeah, thanks. It would just be weird.”

 

Michaels smiles at her. “Of course it would.” She hesitates. “Abby, I don’t know you that well, and I just met your man. But I hope you figure out what you need to figure out. You clearly love each other very much.”

 

“Yeah. We do. But we just have some things we need to work through. We both came with a _lot_ of baggage.”

 

“Sure.” She gives Abby a pat on the arm. “Well, get out of here and spend some time with them. I’ll see you Monday.”

 

Abby nods and gives her a wave. She heads out the doors toward the parking lot. She climbs into the passenger seat and fastens her seatbelt.

 

Luka turns his head and smiles at her. “Feel better?”

 

“Yes. You were right, as usual.” She grins at him when he laughs. “We need to stop by the pharmacy and pick up the prescription, and we’re low on Tylenol.”

 

Luka nods as he pulls out of the lot. “Where else did you need to go?”

 

“I thought we could go by The Gardens. Check out the Swan Boats. It’s a nice day.” They had spent some time exploring the city when they’d first gotten there, but hadn’t had the chance to really do anything yet.

 

Luka smiles at her. “Nice.” He glances back at Joe. “Hey Joe, want to go on a boat?”

 

Joe claps happily in his seat. “Boat!”

 

Luka chuckles. “Looks like he’s feeling better.”

 

“Well, he just had a dose of Tylenol. He’ll be okay for a couple of hours. The fresh air will do him good. I thought we could grab lunch somewhere after.”

 

Luka nods. “What else is on your mind?”

 

Abby rolls her eyes and huffs out a breath. “This is getting annoying.”

 

“What?” He frowns at her.

 

“This sudden radar you have for my moods. I mean, you’ve always been able to read me pretty well, but you missed a lot of huge, glaring stuff.” She reaches over and lays a hand on his arm when his frown deepens. “I didn’t mean that as a criticism, Luka. I did the same with you.”

 

He gives a slight smile. “Yeah. So. What’s going on?”

 

“I asked Michaels the other day if she would find me some good couples therapists in the city.”

 

When Luka just nods, she rushes on. “I mean, if you still want to do that. I just thought…”

 

He shake his head. “No, Abby, it was a good idea. It was easier than trying to research for ourselves.”

 

Abby nods. “Okay. Then we’re going to set something up?”

 

He smiles at her. “Whatever it takes, right?”

 

Abby feels relief wash over her. “I can’t believe either one of us is volunteering for therapy.”

 

Luka snorts out a laugh. “We don’t have the best track record, huh?” He shakes his head. “I went when Kerry forced me to, and then again when Sam thought we needed it.”

 

He glances over to catch Abby rolling her eyes at that. “What?”

 

She giggles. “Come on, Luka. The fact that she forced you into that was pretty ridiculous.”

 

“It wasn’t pretty ridiculous.” He glances over at her with a stony look, but can’t keep his face straight. “It was absolutely ridiculous.”

 

Abby grins at him, and settles back in the seat, content as he drives them toward the heart of Boston.

 


	8. Chapter 8

“So are you ready to do this?” Abby glances at Luka as they rode in the elevator of a non-descript building near where they lived in Cambridge. They had spent the weekend enjoying Joe and each other. Joe had loved the park and gone nuts over the Swan Boats. They had grabbed burgers after that, and capped off the evening snuggled together on the couch watching The Lion King. Abby had called this office on Monday for an appointment, and they easily fit them in on Thursday, which worked since she rotated Thursdays and Luka worked a half shift.

 

Luka glances over and gives a small smile and a nod. Abby had been a huge ball of anxiety since making the appointment. She had been short with Luka and at work. She just didn’t know what to expect out of this. She had faith it was going to help in the long-run, but in the meanwhile it would be painful. She’d been through it before. “Sorry I’ve been such a bitch this week.”

 

Luka smiles fully at her then and raises his eyebrows, as if to say “really? I’m used to it”, but he holds his tongue. Abby just shakes her head and steps up to reception when they exit the elevator. “Abby Lockhart and Luka Kovač. We have an appointment with Dr. Anders.”

 

The receptionist smiles at them and hands them each a clipboard. “Of course. Fill these out, and she’ll call you in a few minutes.”

 

Abby glances at it and recognizes the forms that are handed out in every therapists office in all the land. She and Luka walk over to the small waiting area and sit next to each other, filling out the paperwork. Luka snorts after a bit. “How about I just answer yes to all of this?”

 

Abby laughs. “I know. But it just gives them a baseline.” When he nods and sets the clipboard on his lap, Abby reaches over for his hand. Soon, a small, trim, Asian woman of about fifty steps out of a doorway.

 

“Abby and Luka?” She smiles at them when they both nod. “Come on back.”

 

Her office is small and warm. With a couch and overstuffed chairs, plants and mellow paintings. There is a pile of toys in the corner, indicating that she also does child and family therapy. Abby and Luka settle themselves on the couch and wait for her to sit in one of the chairs. She watches them for a moment. They look a little tense. “So, What brings you to see me?”

 

Luka glances at Abby and she smiles. “We both have some stuff to work on, and we’re not very good at communicating with each other.”

 

Anders nods. “Okay. How about you both give me a thumbnail roundup of your relationship and your stuff. Abby? Would you like to go first? You can call me Monica by the way.”

 

“Okay. Well, I grew up with a Bipolar mother and no father. I had a little brother who depended on me for pretty much everything, and I was only six years older than he was. Then he grew up and it turns out he had the disease as well. I got married while I was still in college to someone I liked a lot, but didn’t really love. But I guess, it was a way to get away from my mother and have someone take care of me for once.” Abby pauses and takes a deep breath. “I got my degree in nursing, and worked for awhile to help put my first husband through Med school. The deal was that he would do the same for me.” Luka reaches over for her hand, and she squeezes his. “He reneged on that deal pretty quickly. Well. You said thumbnail. Basically he cheated, he lied, he treated me like crap. I started drinking and that spiraled into alcoholism.”

 

Anders holds up a hand. “Are you sober now?”

 

Abby glances at Luka and nods. “Yeah, over eight months now. I had a relapse about a year ago.”

 

The doctor nods. “Alright, continue.”

 

“So yeah. I got my shit together, got sober and got divorced. I started working at County General, in Chicago, as an OB nurse. And I met Luka.” She gives him a grin. “Let’s say that it was easy to be attracted.”

 

Anders laughs. “Understandable.” She smiles at Luka, who shrugs with an easy grin.

 

“Anyways, I started medical school again, and that fell through. So I ended up down in the ER as a nurse because the chief thought it was better for me if I had that experience. She was right. Luka and I started seeing each other, and it got fairly intense pretty quickly. We were together for about a year, and then we had a nasty breakup. I said some things that I still regret, and he said some awful things to me. But we ended up managing to be friends, and it got to the point where he was my best friend. We both had other relationships. But...there was a time that I thought he was dead, and I realized that I couldn’t live without him in my life.”

 

Luka looks over at her sharply. “You never told me that.”

 

Abby sighs. “Luka, you came back from the Congo with Malaria and a French nurse. And Carter had just dumped me, in a letter that you delivered. Did you really expect me to declare my love?”

 

He frowns at her and mutters. “No. But a heads up would have been nice.”

 

“Sorry. Anyways, we settled back into our friendship. I went back to medical school, I graduated, he lived with someone else. After they broke up, we got back together and I got pregnant.”

 

Anders glances at her notes and nods. “I see you two have a son?”

 

“Yeah, Joe. He’s a little over two.” Abby smiles. “My pregnancy was, well we should probably get into all of that later. But he was born premature after a shoot-out at the hospital.”

 

“That’s difficult.”

 

“It was the worst time in my life.” Abby says quietly. “Not knowing if he would live or not. And I was worried about Luka because of his past.”

 

“Which he can tell me about in a moment. I’m still getting your perspective.”

 

Abby nods. “Anyways, he lived and we moved in together. We went through a hard time with a patient that was suing Luka and stalking us. We got through that, and we got married.” Luka’s still holding her hand and squeezes it. “A little over a week later, he left to go take care of his father in Croatia.” She sighs. “We should probably get into all of this later too, but I relapsed, and it was really bad. I ended up sleeping with someone else while I was drunk and blacked out. Luka came back, he knew something was wrong, but I wouldn’t talk about it. I told him about the drinking, and went to rehab. After I confessed everything, he moved out for a little while. But he came home, and we moved here.” Abby closes her eyes. “Um. I think that’s it.”

 

“That’s quite a bit.” Anders nods. “Luka?”

 

Luka stares at Abby. It was like a floodgate had opened, and she had revealed everything in a rush. He wasn’t sure where to start. “A lot of our relationship is how Abby told it.”

 

“Alright. But I’m looking for your perspective. Why don’t you start with things from before?”

 

Luka is silent for a moment and he notes that Abby is watching him quietly. He never talks about it. He’d never seen the point. But he decides that if this was going to help, he was going to have to. “I was married young as well. Her name was Danielja. We loved each other very much, and we had two children together, Jasna and Marko.” Luka feels tears start to build because it still hurt, and always would. “They were killed in the war.”

 

“That must have been devastating.”

 

Luka blinks and nods. “It was. I moved here to the States because staying in Croatia seemed almost impossible. My brother was angry with me, but I couldn’t breathe there. So I came here. I drifted around from hospital to hospital, just a ghost working as a moonlighting attending. I landed at County with no intention of staying. But I ended up making friends, and liking Chicago. And then I met Abby.” He gives her a tender smile. “I was sort of seeing someone else, but I felt the attraction too.”

 

Abby smiles back at him and he continues. “Our first date was a disaster. I killed a man.” He stops when Anders gasps a little.

 

“Sorry, go on?” She was absolutely fascinated now.

 

“He attacked us, so I defended Abby, and myself I suppose.” He adds as an afterthought. Luka sighs. “I pulled away from her after that because I didn’t think she would want me after seeing that side of me.” He looks over at her again. “I was wrong. The first time we were together, I felt things I never thought I would feel again. I fell in love with her, but things were complicated. There was another man who was kind of an interloper in our relationship. They were just friends, but it was difficult because it seemed like she talked to him more than me.”

 

Abby shifts her eyes over to him and he smiles a little. “Not that I made it easy to talk to me. Anyways, we broke up, she started dating someone else, and I kind of went crazy. I started drinking a lot, sleeping with everyone who would have me, acting stupid and reckless. I nearly killed a medical student, and that’s when I decided I had to be out of Chicago for awhile. So I went to the Congo to work with L’Alliance. I nearly died because of it.” He sighs. “When I got back, I had every intention of going back to Africa. I ended up in a relationship with someone that I now realize I thought I loved because I was close with her son, and she needed someone to take care of her. When that ended, the rest is pretty much like Abby said. When Joe was born, well. We were a family. We’re committed to staying together this time. So we need some help to do that.”

 

Anders leans forward in her chair and considers them both. They look wrung out. “Alright. Here’s where we’re all at. You two look emotionally exhausted, so I’m not going to push for more. It’s not easy when you’re not used to talking about hard things to be so vulnerable, especially with a stranger.” She nods when they both look relieved. “I want to look over my notes, and I want to see you both individually before your next session together.” When Luka opens his mouth, she shakes her head. “This is how it works, Luka. I want to help you, but you have to let me.”

 

He nods at that, and she rises. “You can make appointments with Cathy at the front desk. It was nice to meet you both. I’ll see you soon.”

 

Luka and Abby shake her hand and thank her and head to the desk to make appointments. Luka glances at her. “Are you okay?”

 

“Yeah, you?”

 

He nods. They make the trip home in silence. They have a couple of hours before they need to get Joe from daycare. Luka closes the front door and lays a hand on Abby’s shoulder. “Why didn’t you ever tell me when you realized that you loved me?”

 

Abby turns and glares at him. “Why didn’t you tell _me_ that you were in love with me when we were together before?”

 

Luka holds up his hands. “Woah. I didn’t mean anything by that. I’m just curious.”

 

She shrugs. “Because I didn’t think you felt the same way.”

 

Luka reaches out and cups her face with one hand. “Hey.”

 

Abby shrugs again. “You never said it before, Luka. We barely said it to each other until recently.” They had started saying it more when he had moved back home. A kind of reaffirmation that they were together.

 

“I’m sorry for that.” He lowers his head and watches her from under his lashes. “I’ve loved you since the first night you came to my hotel room. I never stopped.”

 

Abby’s head jerks up sharply. “What?”

 

“Abby, I hadn’t been with anyone other than Danijela, until you. I didn’t want to be. I never thought I could.” He smiles a little and takes her hand. “You changed that when you hunted me down and offered me comfort, and hope.” He pulls her in close and presses a soft kiss to her lips, and then deepens it, letting his tongue dance over hers.

 

Abby groans and murmurs against his mouth. “How do you always manage to get around me when I’m pissed at you?”

 

His grin flashes and he pushes her back against the wall. “One of my favorite talents.” Luka grips her thigh and pulls it up so her leg wraps around his waist. He takes her mouth again in a deep, ferocious kiss. He pulls back and watches her face as he slides his hand down to the top of the buttons of her shirt. “How much do you like this shirt?”

 

Abby opens dazed eyes, “what shirt?”

 

That’s all the answer he needs as he tears it down the front. Luka offers up a short prayer of thanks that she prefers a bra with a front clasp. He feels her arms come around his neck as he lowers his mouth to her breasts and feeds. His hands slide down to her hips and he pulls her closer, the friction from his pants against his hard length, and the feel of her against him nearly driving him mad.

 

He trails his lips up her throat to her mouth again as he feels her hands slide down and work his belt free. She yanks at the button of his slacks and unzips them, frees him. Luka takes her hands again and draws them up over her head, pinning them against the wall. He needs control at the moment, and she lets him take it. He pulls her button free and slides the pants over her hips with one hand, the other gripping her wrists together like irons. He looks down at her, head tipped back, mouth slightly open and swollen with her breath rushing out. Her torn shirt hung off her arms in tatters, exposing the rest of her. God, she’s beautiful when she’s like this. So lost in him, in them, that she lets herself be free.

 

Luka watches her intensely as he slides his hand down and cups her core. She moans and her head falls farther back. She’s hot and wet and ready for him. He brings his mouth back to hers as he pleasures her, her hips rocking against his hand. She screams his name as she comes.

 

“Luka, now. Please.”

 

“Soon.” He keeps his hand against her while he slides his foot free of his pants. “Abby.” He drops his forehead to hers.

 

Abby is reduced to whimpers at this point, and he smiles. Knowing that no other man had ever been able to do this for her. He lets go of her hands and grips her hips with both of his. Hitching her up so her legs wrap around his waist, he pins her to the wall and drives himself into her.

 

She opens shocked eyes to see him watching her and she feels him moving inside of her. His eyes are dark and focused on her face, as if searching for something. She lifts her limp arms and cups his face, taking his mouth again as he thrusts deep and hard. Abby feels his hands tighten on her hips and knows he’s close, but he’s holding back for her. She bites his lip to hear him moan, and that throws her over the edge a second time. Luka wraps his arms around her and empties himself into her.

 

It takes a few moments for each of them to come back to reality. They’re still against the wall, breathing hard, when her legs slide from around his waist. Luka’s not sure how his legs haven’t given out. He manages to push back and just grins down at her dazzled face. “If I had known that therapy would result in _that_ , we would have tried it years ago.”

 

Abby opens her eyes and giggles at him. “I was just having the same thought.” Her eyes land on the clock in the living room through the doorway. “We need to go get Joe, soon. But we need to shower first. We’re kind of disgusting.”

 

Luka’s grin flashes as he bends to pick up the rest of their clothes. “But it’s a good disgusting, yeah?”

 

Abby laughs and takes his hand to move upstairs. “Of course.”


	9. Chapter 9

Abby comes down from surgery completely drained. Drunk driving cases had been hitting her harder than they used to. In this case, a young mother had flipped her car with a BAC of .24. Her daughter had been extremely lucky, and escaped with cuts and bruises. Mom was having her spleen removed and they didn’t know her neuro status yet as she was intoxicated, but she’d been hypoxic as well. _That could have been me._ Abby closes her eyes and leans against the wall.

 

Michaels comes around the corner and spots her. “Hey. Aren’t you off?”

 

“An hour ago, yeah. I called Luka, he knows I had to stay.” Abby isn’t sure why she’s telling her boss that, but it was already out.

 

Michaels nods. She was well aware of Abby’s alcoholism, she had been open about it with the hiring committee from the start. “Want some coffee?”

 

Abby nods and follows Michaels to the lounge. Dawn pours two cups from the pot and hands one to Abby. “Sorry. Do I look that bad?”

 

“No. But you look exhausted. Are you alright? You did everything you could for her.”

 

Abby shakes her head. “I know I did. Just...DUI’s hit me hard lately.”

 

“Want to talk about it?” She studies Abby quietly.

 

Abby smiles. She and Dawn had become friends since she’d been here. It helps that she reminds Abby of Kerry. “Thanks, but it’s a long story, and I really should get home. I just want you to know that it won’t get in the way of my work.”

 

Michaels nods. “I know that. But any time you need an ear, I’m here.”

 

“Thanks for that.” Abby turns to gather her things and put away her lab coat and stethoscope. She closes her locker. “See you tomorrow?”

 

“No, you won’t. Praise be to God.” Michaels laughs a little. “I’m taking a day off.”

 

Abby is surprised. She didn’t think Dawn had taken a day off since she’d been there. “Wow. Good for you.”

 

“Yes. Good for me. Now go home and see your family. And Abby? Try to let today go.”

 

Abby calls Janet the minute she’s in the car.

 

“Abby?”

 

“Hi.” She feels immediate relief hearing her sponsor’s voice.

 

“How’s it going? Settling in?”

 

“Yeah. We’ve got a rhythm down now. Luka loves where he’s at, and I really like MG a lot.”

 

“That’s good to hear. How’s Joe?”

 

Abby smiles. “He’s great. Talking quite a bit, but still getting English and Croatian mixed up.”

 

Janet laughs. “Well, that’s understandable, Luka still does the same and he’s what? 43?”

 

Abby gives a chuckle. “Yeah.”

 

“So what’s going on? Is this a friendly call or a sponsor thing?”

 

Abby sighs. “A little of both. I’ve been having some problems dealing with DUI cases. I had a flashback today.”

 

Janet is silent for a moment. “To driving with Joe?”

 

“Yeah. This young mom came in. She had flipped her car with a high BAC. Her daughter was in the car with her. She was alright, but the mom’s still in surgery.”

 

“I can see why that would be hard for you. But that didn’t happen to you. Worrying about what might have happened is useless.”

 

Abby rolls her eyes. “I know that. I just wanted to talk to someone who would understand. I don’t want to dump it on Luka. We’ve been doing a lot of talking about hard things lately and I can tell it’s starting to wear on him.”

 

“Well, I’m glad you called to dump it on me.” She laughs when she hears Abby’s groan. “I didn’t mean it like that. I’m glad you called. Have you found a sponsor there yet?”

 

“Not yet. I’m still meeting people and feeling my way here.”

 

“Well, I’m happy to keep it up long distance, but you really should find someone there.”

 

“I know that. I will. I, ah, I had a craving a couple of weeks ago.”

 

Janet sighs. “Well, I’ve been sober a lot longer than you, and I still have them. It’s normal. Did you drink?”

 

“No. It was just a really crappy day and I had this thought that some wine would be nice. I shut it down and talked to Luka about it. And I went to a meeting the next day.”

 

“It sounds like you handled it perfectly.”

 

“I guess.” Abby pulls into the driveway. “Well, I’m home. I should go see my boys. Talk to you soon?”

 

“Sure. Abby? You can call anytime. I mean that.”

 

“I know that too. Thanks. Bye.” Abby hangs up the phone and heads in the house.

 

“Abby?” She hears Luka call out.

 

“Who were you expecting?” She calls back.

 

Luka comes down the stairs and grins at her. “Sorry. I’ve got a pizza coming.”

 

“Pretty sure the pizza guy would ring the doorbell.” She laughs and shrugs out of her coat. “Pizza, huh?”

 

“Yeah. Joe’s been a handful so I didn’t have time to cook. I gave him a, what do you call them? PBJ?”

 

Abby smirks. “Yeah.”

 

“So he ate and had his bath. He’s down for the night. The antibiotics are making him feel better, but you know how it goes.”

 

Abby nods. He probably had a stomach ache and tired out more easily. “Okay.”

 

Luka leans down to kiss her. “How’s your patient?” He takes her hand and draws her into the living room where they settle on the couch.

 

“Still in surgery. They were doing a splenectomy. And her neuro status is still unknown.”

 

Luka nods. “Are you okay?”

 

Abby smiles at him and nods. “Yeah. I called Janet on the way home. It just kind of hit me.”

 

Luka is quiet. “Okay. Just, if you…”

 

“I know. But really, I’m okay.”

 

They’re interrupted by the doorbell. Luka rises and pulls out his wallet. He opens the door to accept the pizza and pay, closing it with his thanks.

 

Abby rises to follow him into the kitchen. They had a formal dining room, but had never used it. She lifts the lid on the pizza and is pleased to see that he’d split it. They never could agree on pizza toppings.

 

“It’s supposed to be Chicago style.” Luka grins.

 

Abby snorts. “Making the crust thicker doesn’t make it Chicago Style.”

 

“Well, begging can’t make you choose.”

 

Abby just shakes her head and laughs. “Right. And now I _know_ you do that on purpose. It looks okay though.” She scoops up a slice, loaded with sausage, olives and mushrooms. Bites in. “It’s good.”

 

Luka takes a bite of his own pepperoni, ham and onion and nods. “It is. It’s not Lou Malnati’s, but it will do.”

 

They eat in comfortable silence for a few minutes. He looks at her teasingly. “I’ll have to brush my teeth before I kiss you goodnight, yeah?”

 

“Damn right you will.” She grins back at him. He knows well how much she despises onions.

 

“Luka?”

 

“Hmmm?”

 

“Thank you for not having alcohol in the house anymore.”

 

He smiles at her, and reaches over to take her hand. “Abby. Together, right?”

 

She squeezes his fingers. “I know. But you don’t have to do it. I know you enjoy a beer, especially with pizza. So, thanks.” She smiles at him.

 

He considers her. Luka hadn’t even been sure that Abby had noticed. He shakes his head, realizing how stupid that was. “I do. But I enjoy you with pizza more.” He smiles at her when she blushes. “Abby, I told you once that I could never give it up. That I would miss it too much. I don’t. I don’t miss it at all. Anything I can do to keep you healthy, I’ll do it.”

 

Abby rises and skirts around the table to drop into his lap. She rests her forehead against his. “I love you. So much.”

 

Luka strokes his hand over her hair and sighs. “I know.”

 

“But I’m still not kissing you with onion breath.”

 


	10. Chapter 10

Luka steps out into the ambulance bay to stretch his legs and get a breath of fresh air. It had been a busy day, but manageable enough. He has an appointment with Dr. “Call me Monica” Anders at five, so he checks his watch to be sure he’s still on schedule to leave when he’s supposed to. It was one of the rare evenings that he and Abby _should_ get home on time, and together. _Jesus, I just want to go home and skip the therapy session._ Luka scowls to himself. Spilling his guts out with Abby in the room is bad enough, but he really wasn’t looking forward to hashing his past over with a complete stranger. He sighs. _Whatever it takes. You promised your wife, and you’re not going to break another promise to her. Besides, this was your idea._

 

Luka’s lost in his thoughts when he hears someone hail him in surprise. He looks over and doesn’t know whether to groan or laugh when he sees Jake Scanlon heading his way. Luka puts on a polite smile and extends his hand. “Jake. What are you doing here?”

 

Jake grins at him. “Looking at Boston hospitals. I’ve already got a couple of interviews set up, but I wanted to see what else was here. Apparently, you are.” He gives Luka a curious look.

 

“Yeah, we moved here a few months ago.”

 

“You and Sam? Is she working here too? Is her kid still as weird as ever?”

 

Luka snorts. “Alex is a good kid, and yes. Still weird. But no, not me and Sam. That ended shortly after you left for San Francisco.”

 

Jake notes the wedding ring on Luka’s left hand. “Oh. Sorry about that. So….well. None of my business.”

 

Luka grins mischievously and snickers. “I married Abby, Jake.”

 

The man looks nonplussed for a moment and then recovers. “Oh. Ah, well that’s great. Really. You guys were always tight. But strangely, I thought it was Dr. Carter I had to worry about when I was with her. No offense.”

 

Luka snorts again. “Me too. And none taken. So do you have something set up here?”

 

“Nah. Like I said, just checking things out.” They turn to walk inside together. “Ah, is Abby working here too?”

 

Luka shakes his head and smiles a little. He debates whether he should tell Jake what he’s in for. “No. She’s an attending in the ER at Mass General.”

 

Jake stops short. “Oh. Is she?”

 

Luka can’t hide his amusement. He should be able to have some fun while he can. “Yeah. She’s in charge of new hires.”

 

Luka can’t help himself when Jake’s eyes widen and he looks terrified. He laughs. “I’m kidding, Jake. She’s worked there for a little over a month. She’s not hiring anyone. I’m assuming you have an interview there?”

 

Jake has visibly relaxed. “Yeah. Tomorrow. Uh, is that going to be a problem for you?”

 

Luka gives him a quiet stare. “No. Why would it be?”

 

Jake holds up his hands. “Easy, big guy. Just checking. I don’t want there to be any problems or anything.”

 

Luka rolls his eyes. “Jake, you broke up with my wife years ago. We all work in a fairly intimate field. Working with exes is part of the deal.”

 

“Well. Okay.” Jake clears his throat. “So, ah, do you think you can point me toward the ER chief? Unless that’s you.”

 

“Nope. I gave up management.” He puts his hand on Jake’s shoulder. “Let’s find him.”

 

Two hours later, Jake had been given a tour of the ER and set up a casual interview with Daniels. They didn’t have anything open at the moment, but Luka knew Daniels had done it as a courtesy. He waves Jake off and heads to the lounge to get ready to leave. Daniels follows him in.

 

“So, you had that guy as a Med student?”

 

Luka nods. “Yeah. He was good. Quick, smart and thorough. But I have no idea how he progressed since. He did his residency out West.” Luka closes his locker and picks up his briefcase. “Oh. And he used to date my wife.”

 

Daniels chokes on the coffee he was sipping. “Wait, what?”

 

Luka grins. “See you tomorrow.”

 

He gets in the car in a much lighter frame of mind than he’d been in earlier that day. Messing with Jake had put him in a pretty good mood. Luka grins when his phone goes off. “Hello, my beautiful wife.”

 

Abby is quiet for a moment. “Who are you and what have you done with my husband?”

 

“He’s locked in the trunk. You may have to pay a ransom to get him back.”

 

“Well, if you’re as cute as he is, maybe we can work something out.”

 

Luka laughs at that. “The price will be steep. What’s going on?”

 

“Just letting you know I’m leaving soon and I’ll get Joe. You’re still going to the appointment?”

 

“Of course.”

 

Abby hesitates. “Ah, okay. Well...I’ll see you at home.”

 

Luka pulls into the small parking lot of the office. “Okay. Abby?”

 

“Yeah?”

 

“Don’t worry about me.”

 

He hears her huff out a breath. “Fine. I love you too.”

 

He laughs and hangs up the phone. Luka manages to sign in and fill out his paperwork about three seconds before Dr. Anders appears. “Luka. Nice to see you again.”

 

He nods and follows her into the office and sits in the same place he had before. Anders nods to him. “So. I’m glad you came. I didn’t know if you’d be receptive to a one-on-one.”

 

Luka shrugs. “I’m trying to do this right. For my marriage, and my family.”

 

“What about yourself?” Anders gives him a long look. “Are you doing this for _you_?”

 

Luka is taken aback a bit by the question. “Of course I am. It’s the same thing.”

 

She shakes her head.”No, it’s not. But we’ll get into that.”

 

Luka blinks. “I’m not sure what you’re talking about.”

 

Anders sighs. “Luka, it’s pretty clear that your identity is wrapped up in two things. Being a doctor, and being a husband and father. They may switch places on your priority list, but those are the top two, aren’t they?”

 

Luka opens his mouth, and unsure what to respond, closes it again. He shrugs.

 

“You told me last week about losing your family in Croatia. And then about Abby and your breakup and how hard that was on you.” She glances at her notes. “You mentioned another relationship that you tried to make work because the woman had a child, and she needed someone to be with. And back to Abby, wherein she got pregnant and you married her. Would you have married her without the baby?”

 

Luka starts to get angry. “Of course I would have. I never needed children with Abby. She knows that.”

 

Anders gives him a small smile. “Does she?”

 

“Yes.” Luka nods firmly. “When she got pregnant…” Luka drags his hands through his hair. “When she got pregnant, she was thinking about not having the baby. She was….she was worried about the baby ending up Bipolar, and her own ability to be a mother.”

 

Anders nods. “Those are reasonable fears. How did you handle that?”

 

Luka drops his hands. “The only way I know how. I’ve never lied to Abby.” A thought passes through his mind, _no, you only kept things from her..._ He shakes his head and continues. “I told her that I wanted her to have the baby. That we’d find a way to make it work.”

 

“Did you use those words?”

 

“I guess. I don’t remember exactly.” Luka frowns.

 

“And did you tell her that you wanted _her_?” Anders asks quietly.

 

He opens his mouth and closes it again. Thinking back, trying to remember that time. It was beautiful and chaotic and terrible all at once. He suddenly remembers dancing with her on New Years Eve. _“And what are you looking for? Someone to have a baby with?” “Is that what you think? Because if it is, then what the hell are we doing here?”_ Luka frowns. “More or less.” He shakes his head. “But after, when I thought she’d had the abortion, I told her that I still wanted us to be together.”

 

Anders sets her clipboard down and tucks one of her legs under her. “Luka, can you see where Abby might have had worries that you only wanted to stay with her because she was pregnant with your child?” She holds up her hand when she sees him start to speak. “No, just listen a minute. You had known each other for a long time. Sometimes our friends and lovers see things in us that we don’t see in ourselves. The more intimate we are, the more pronounced it is. Abby watched you chase the dream of having a family again for a long time. It’s understandable that she would have some reservations.”

 

Luka blows out a breath, defeated. “I guess.”

 

Anders smiles at him gently. “Abby mentioned your first break-up. Would you care to tell me what happened? What was said?”

 

Luka sighs. “Sure. We had been together for about a year. I guess I…” He breaks off and frowns. “I guess I started taking her for granted. And I was getting more and more annoyed that she seemed to spend more time with Carter than with me.”

 

“Carter is the other man you mentioned last time?”

 

Luka gives a small smile. “Yeah. She was his AA sponsor for awhile, and then they grew pretty close. I never thought she would cheat on me, but I knew Carter had feelings for her, and so did she. I felt like she was encouraging his crush or whatever it was.”

 

“And did you talk to her about it?”

 

He shrugs. “A little. But we didn’t do a lot of talking about anything in general.”

 

Anders nods and smiles. “Well, that’s why you’re here now, right? Go on.”

 

“We went out to dinner one night, and I admit, I was a pretty big asshole. I flirted with the waitress right in Abby’s face. And then I pretty much ignored her.”

 

Anders raises her eyebrows but says nothing. She’s not surprised.

 

“Anyways. She called me on it, and I called her a bitch, and….I told her she wasn’t pretty or special.” Luka hangs his head at that. He’d regretted those words from the moment they’d come out of his mouth. “I told her Carter could have her, after she told me I was married to a ghost. And we walked away from each other.”

 

Anders nods. “That sounds difficult.”

 

“It was.” Luka gives a sad smile. “It didn’t help that I hooked up with the waitress I’d been flirting with pretty much right away.” He frowns, thinking of Nicole and how close he’d come to making a gigantic mistake by marrying her. Because of a non-existent baby. He sighs. Anders had a point about the father thing. “Anyways. That was just...I guess a rebound, but I know it hurt Abby. We ended up managing to be friends.” He smiles again. “I never really stopped loving her. Not even when I was with other people. I tried to love Sam. I even told her that I loved her a lot faster than I should have. Faster than I told Abby.”  Luka shrugs. “I cared about her a lot. And I cared about Alex, but I never felt for Sam what I felt with Abby or Danielja.”

 

Anders nods. “Your first wife.”

 

He smiles fully. “Yeah. She was my first love. We married young and it was….idealistic, I guess. Then the kids came and I was doing my residency, and it was all just this normal thing. It was everything I’d ever wanted.”

 

“We’ll talk more about that next time. I’d like Abby here when we get more deeply into that, because I have a feeling you haven’t told her a lot about that time in your life, right?”

 

Luka gives her a sad and sheepish look. “No. It’s hard.”

 

Anders nods. “Understandable. But it’s something you need to work through, with her.”

 

He nods. “Anyway. I don’t want you to think that Abby and Joe are some sort of replacement for them. They’re not. They’re everything to me.”

 

“I don’t think that. But I wonder if Abby does.”

 

Luka shakes his head. “What I feel for Abby is just as deep, just as strong as what I felt for Danielja. Sometimes I wonder if it’s stronger. We’ve had more time to build it together.”

 

Anders smiles fully at him. “That’s a good thing, Luka. It means you’ve really moved on. But Abby needs to know that.”

  
  
  



	11. Chapter 11

Abby turns from the stove when she hears the door open and Luka call her name. “In the kitchen!”

 

She watches him walk in and give her a baffled smile. “Hi.”

 

“Hey. You’re cooking?”

 

“I can cook some things, Luka. I’m just basic.” She turns back to the stove where she has spaghetti sauce simmering and shrugs. “We’ve had a lot of take out lately, so I figured I’d just make something.”

 

“No, it’s great. Smells good.” She feels his arms come around her waist from behind and the kiss on the top of her head.

 

“So, how did it go?” Abby tips her head back to look at him.

 

Luka steps back and smiles a little. “It was good. We should probably talk about it later.” He glances down at Joe, who is banging a wooden spoon against a pot on the floor. “Oh, hey. I saw Jake today.”

 

Abby spins around quickly after closing the oven door where she’d just placed the garlic bread. “ _What?”_

 

Luka laughs and sits down at the table. “Yeah, I was catching a break in the bay, and he just wandered in. He was pretty surprised to see me.” He grins at her.

 

“Okay. You have that look.”

 

Luka gives her an innocent expression. “What look?”

 

“The ‘I totally fucked with somebody and now I’m proud of myself’ look.” She narrows her eyes at him. “What did you do?”

 

Luka grins at her with a twinkle in his eyes. “I totally fucked with him.”

 

Abby rolls her eyes. “Luka…”

 

“Abby, it’s fine. It was actually good to see him. He does know we’re married now though.”

 

“That’s it?”

 

“Yeah. He asked what I was doing in Boston, so I told him we’d moved here a few months ago. He assumed by _we_ that I meant Sam.”

 

Abby casts her eyes to the ceiling again. “So you set him straight. You didn’t have some sort of dick measuring contest did you?”

 

Luka gives her a baffled look. “I don’t even know what that means.”

 

“Never mind. So what was he doing at BM?”

 

“Checking out the other hospitals in the area. He mentioned he has an interview at MG tomorrow, so I told him you were working there. And in charge of hiring.”

 

Abby snorts. “He didn’t believe that.” She turns with the pot in her hands to the sink to drain the pasta.

 

“For a minute he did.” Luka’s grin lights up. “You should have seen his face.”

 

Abby laughs as she pulls a salad out of the refrigerator and sets it on the table. “So this is why you were in such a good mood when I talked to you earlier.”

 

“Hey, I’ve got to get my kicks where I can make them.” He smiles at her when she sets the bowls of pasta and sauce on the table and turns back for the plate of garlic bread. “How was your day?”

 

“Fine. Joe seems like he’s back to a hundred percent. Susan called. They’re going to come between Christmas and New Year’s if that’s okay.” Abby joins him at the table.

 

“That’s fine. I’m looking forward to seeing them, I always liked Chuck.”

 

“Yeah, he’s got this weird, quirky charm about him. It worked for Susan. I never would have put them together.”

 

Luka smiles. “Me either. But I did see more of them together than I wanted to.”

 

Abby grins at him. “Yeah. She was so embarrassed since she gave you such a hard time about that patient’s mother.”

 

Luka rolls his eyes. “I was sowing my oats.” He reaches over and takes her hand. “And pining for you.”

 

Abby squeezes his fingers. “That’s a good mixed metaphor. Nice job.” She grins at him and scoops up spaghetti and sauce for Joe, adding some salad and a piece of bread, while Luka does the same for each of them. “Use the fork, Joe. Twirl the spaghetti like I showed you.”

 

Joe picks up his fork and with a look of concentration, digs into his pasta.

 

“Good job.” Abby twirls her own spaghetti. “So did anything else good happen today? I see you got out of the trunk.”

 

Luka grins at her. “Yeah. The other guy let me out. Nothing much else. The session was interesting.”

 

“I thought you wanted to talk about that later.”

 

“I do. We will. But I just wanted to say that I’m glad we’re doing this.”

 

“Me too.”

 

Luka takes kitchen clean up duty while Abby takes Joe upstairs for his bath and bedtime. After his story, Joe falls asleep in the same position Luka always does. Legs sprawled out. One arm across his waist, and the other tossed above his head. She smiles and pulls his door most of the way closed.

 

Abby finds Luka in the bedroom, propped up against the headboard with a journal in his lap. She walks to her dresser to pull out her pajamas. “Your son sleeps exactly like you.”

 

Luka smiles at her. “How’s that?”

 

“Sprawled out with an arm over the head. And snoring. I pity his future wife.” She wiggles out of her clothes and pulls on a tank and flannel bottoms. “What?” She looks over to find him grinning fully at her.

 

“Nothing. Just enjoying the show. And it’s cute how you complain about my sleep habits.” He laughs when she shoves his leg over to crawl into bed beside him. “Can we talk now?”

 

Abby is suddenly nervous, and she turns her head to blink at him. “Sure.”

 

Luka takes her hand. “Well. This might take awhile.” He clears his throat. “Monica pointed some things out today that I feel like I need to explain to you.”

 

She nods. “Okay.”

 

Luka takes a deep breath. “She told me she thinks that a lot of my identity is wrapped up in being a husband and father. And that you still might feel like I only wanted to be with you because of Joe. Because you gave me a family again.”

 

Abby is silent. The truth was, she _had_ felt that way. For a very long time. She knows Luka loves her. Of course she knows that. But she had always thought in the back of her mind that he loved her for those exact reasons. She nods. “Maybe.”

 

Luka puts his arm around her and pulls her closer. “I understand now why you might have thought that. It never even crossed my mind before that you could believe it.” He kisses the top of her head. “You knew me for a long time, and you saw what happened with Nicole, and Sam. Even Carol before you. I _did_ want to have another child. I’m a good father. But I guess I never realized how much that showed to everyone else.”

 

Abby nods. “You might as well have been wearing a sign.”

 

Luka chuckles. “Yeah. I can see it now. What is it you always call me? Oblivious?”

 

She smiles. “Yeah.”

 

“But I meant what I told you that day by the pier. After I thought you’d gotten the abortion. It wasn’t just the baby I wanted. The pregnancy was just a happy surprise in our journey together. It was you I wanted and needed.” Luka brings the hand of his free arm up to wipe the tears away from her face. “I told you the other night that I had loved you since the beginning. I wish I had told you sooner. Maybe we wouldn’t have wasted so much time.”

 

Luka shifts and cups her cheek so he can look into her tear-filled eyes. “I love _you_ , Abby. Every piece of you. Even the parts that piss me off.”

 

When Abby nods, Luka shifts again and takes her mouth with his. He has a desperate need to show her just how much he loves her, and needs her. He lifts his head and smiles tenderly at her. “I want to make love to you. I want to show you how much I want you...I always have…”

 

He rolls her to her back and covers her body with his own. Luka slips his fingers under the hem of her tank and strokes along the warm skin of her belly. He lowers his mouth to her throat as he feels her arms come around him. Sliding his hands up, he slips the top over her head. Her quiet moan when he trails his mouth across her collar bone, leaving open mouthed kisses as he goes tells him everything he needs to know.

 

Abby lets her head fall back and wallows in the sensation of Luka touching her, Luka kissing her breasts as his hands stroke along her hips, sliding under the flannel of her bottoms. His body is a warm, comforting weight over hers. She arches her hips to let him slide the pants down, with his lips following the fabric.

 

Her hands are tangled now in his hair as he trails his lips from the inside of her thigh. Luka smiles when she gasps as he uses his mouth on her. He slides his hands under her hips to lift them as he relishes in the hot, sharp taste of woman. _His_ woman. He wants to worship every inch of her, and revels in the sound when she cries his name as she comes.

 

Abby slowly comes back to the moment to feel his mouth on her belly, slowly inching his way back up her body with those delicious open mouthed kisses again. She feels his tongue circle her nipple and moans. “Luka….” His hand with those long, capable fingers is between her legs and she comes again as he feeds at her breasts. _Luka._

 

 _“God._ Now.” She drags his head up and kisses him. His eyes are on hers and they are tender, they are devastating, they are everything. Abby slides her hands down to his hips and helps him  shed his pajama pants. Her hand brushes his hard length and he groans as he takes their kiss deeper. Their tongues are tangled together as he slips inside her.

 

Luka moans as he begins to move inside of her. His eyes still watching her and drowning in her. He sighs as he feels her hands lift to cup his face, and shivers as the pace quickens. Her hips lifting and falling, he sinks into the rhythm. “Abby.” His forehead drops to hers as he lifts her hips to take himself even deeper. “I love you.” Luka’s lips come down on hers again as they surrender to the need together.

 

Luka wraps his arms around her when she snuggles into his side. “Okay?”

 

“Mmmm. Better than okay.” Abby tilts her head up. “Thank you for telling me all of that.”

 

Luka smiles. “I should have made sure you knew it before. I can be kind of stupid about these things.”

 

Abby pinches him. “Hey. Nobody calls you stupid but me.” She smiles when he chuckles. “And you’re not. I don’t make it easy to love me.”

 

Luka shifts so he can look down into her face. “Abby, it’s a lot harder _not_ to love you.” He smiles softly at her. “I’m kind of an expert on that.”

 

Abby gives a small smile. “It’s just...men have _always_ let me down. I can’t think of a single one who didn’t, but you. My father, Richard, Carter. Every other relationship I ever had. You’re the only one who never let me down.”

 

“I hurt you. More than once.”

 

Abby shakes her head. “We hurt each other. And that’s not the same thing. You have _never_ let me down, Luka.” She lifts her hand to stroke his cheek and feels the stubble of a day’s growth of beard. “I don’t think I’ve ever told you how much I appreciate that.”

 

Luka catches her hand and kisses her palm. “I’m glad you’ve stopped waiting for me to let you down.”

 

Abby sighs. “Luka, it’s easy to start feeling like it’s your own fault when it keeps happening. It just took me awhile to let my guard down.”

 

Luka grins at her. “A very long while.”

 

Abby snickers. “Yeah, I guess.” She lifts her head up to kiss him. “So thank you. For always being there for me.”

 

He draws her back down so she’s draped across his chest. “Right back at you.”

  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  



	12. Chapter 12

Abby is just finishing up a trauma and heading to the admit desk when she sees the door to the lounge open. Jake is coming out with Michaels. She puts a smile on her face and detours over. “Jake. It’s good to see you.”

 

Michaels smiles at Abby and pats Jake on the arm. “See you soon.”

 

He looks over and grins at her. “Abby. It’s great to see you too.” Jake awkwardly steps forward and hugs her. “I saw Kovač yesterday.”

 

Abby laughs. “I heard. I hope he didn’t do anything annoying.”

 

Jake shrugs. “I would have screwed with me a little too.”

 

“Okay. So, how did it go? Let’s go back in the lounge for a minute. I just finished a trauma and need coffee.” Abby pushes open the door and lets Jake follow her in before heading to the coffee pot.

 

Jake takes the coffee she offers him. “It went good. Michaels said she would let me know soon, but that I had good recommendations from a staff member.” He smiles when she shrugs. “Is it going to be weird?”

 

Abby toys with her coffee cup. “I admit I had a moment.” She laughs when he raises a brow. “Okay, I freaked out a little. But it was a long time ago. It will be fine.”

 

Jake nods. “So you married Luka, huh?”

 

“Yeah. Well..we had a baby. Then I married him.”

 

Jake just stares at her. “You have a baby?”

 

“Well. Joe’s two and a half now, so not such a baby anymore.”

 

Jake smiles. “Wow. Well...congratulations.”

 

“Thanks. It’s pretty great.” She smiles down at her coffee.

 

“How’d you end up in Boston?”

 

A cloud passes over Abby’s face. “It’s a long story. So, what made _you_ decide on Boston instead of back to Chicago?”

 

Jake shrugs. “I’ve always liked the city. And I’ve got some family nearby.”

 

“Well, I hope it works out. Luka said you set up an interview at BM too?”

 

“Yeah. But this is my first choice.”

 

Abby smiles. “Good. I’ve got to get back.”

 

Jake nods and stands. “I guess I’ll see you when I see you.”

 

Abby finds Michaels at the admit desk. “So his interview went okay?”

 

Michaels nods. “He’s definitely amongst the top candidates.” She studies Abby. “I’ll ask you one last time. Will it bother you if we offer him the job?”

 

“No. Absolutely not. Jake’s a good doctor, and that’s what matters. We weren’t really serious anyways.”

 

“He’s cute.” She snickers when Abby just gives her a baleful glance. “But I’ve seen your husband, so you definitely upgraded.”

 

Abby gives Michaels a smug grin and grabs a chart. “Sure did.”

 

She finishes her shift in a decent state of mind. Two more traumas came in, and both had made it through. But Abby felt the need for a meeting. She pulls out her phone as she gets in the car and dials Luka. He answers on the first ring. “Hey. Are you heading home?”

 

“Hello to you too. And yes.”

 

Abby rolls her eyes. “Okay. Ah, could you maybe pick up Joe? I want to hit a meeting.”

 

“You okay?”

 

“Yeah. It’s just been a few days. There’s one right up the street from the hospital I thought I’d try.”

 

“Alright. I’ll see you at home. What do you want for dinner?”

 

Abby smiles. “Surprise me.”

 

“Okay. Abby? I love you.”

 

“I know. See you soon.” She smiles as she ends the call.

 

Abby slips into the back row of the meeting, which had already started. An older woman sitting near her leans over. “Topic is amends. Just so you know.

 

Abby nods and smiles. She’s new to this meeting, so keeps it brief when it’s her turn to share. She still had amends to make...she was living them with Luka. But she doesn’t feel up to sharing all of it just yet.

 

After the meeting concludes, the older woman from her row approaches. “Hi Abby. I’m Karen. First time?”

 

Abby smiles at her. “No. Well, first time at this meeting. I just moved to Boston a few months ago, and I’m trying them out.”

 

Karen nods. “How long have you been sober?”

 

“Over nine months.”

 

“Good for you. Do you have a sponsor here yet?” She smiles when Abby looks flustered. “Sorry. I don’t mean to be so direct. I just know what it’s like to be new.”

 

“It’s okay. Thank you. Ah, can I have your number? Maybe we can try it out. I’m still working with my sponsor in Chicago.” She gives a little laugh. “She’s been bugging me to find someone here.”

 

Karen grins. “Chicago, huh? I’m originally from Wheeling. We’ll get along fine. Call anytime.” She hands Abby a card.

 

Abby walks into the house to the smell of Pad Thai and the sound of Joe screaming. She hears Luka’s frustrated _“Jebi ga! Sto trebaš?”_ Knowing the loose translation of those words she hurries back to the kitchen.

 

“Hey you two. What’s going on?”

 

Luka turns and glares at her. “He wants something, but won’t tell me what.” Joe looks completely pitiful as he holds his arms up to her. Luka gives his son a glare too. “Sure. Suck up to her.” He turns back to the stove where he’s making Mac and Cheese for Joe, who won’t touch Thai.

 

Abby kisses Joe’s head. “What’s the matter?” She nods and smiles when he tearfully whines to her what he wants. “Okay. I’ll find it.”

 

Luka turns again to stare at her. “How in the hell did you understand that?”

 

Abby grins. “Years of experience translating someone who doesn’t speak the best English.”

 

“Come on.” But Luka smiles a little. “What does he want?”

 

“His red truck.” Abby sets Joe back on the floor. “It’s not with the other ones.”

 

Luka nods and Abby can tell that he’s calmed down. She walks to him and raises on her toes to kiss him hello. “Hi. It’s a good thing you haven’t taught him any curses in Croatian yet.”

 

He grins at her. “Who says I haven’t?” Luka strokes a hand over her hair. “How was your meeting?”

 

Abby steps back and goes to the toy chest in the corner to find Joe’s truck. “Good. I might have found a sponsor.”

 

Luka’s brow creases. “I thought Janet was your sponsor.”

 

“She is. But it’s better if I have one nearby. I’ll still stay in touch with her.”

 

Luka nods and spoons mac and cheese onto a plate to let it cool. “Okay. You would know how it works. I just know Janet helped you a lot. When I didn’t.”

 

Abby squeezes his arm. “That’s how it works, Luka. It wasn’t about you.”

 

“I know.” He smiles a little. “But it’s still hard sometimes.”

 

“Hey. You’ve done a lot. I couldn’t have done this without you.”

 

Luka turns and gathers her in. “Okay. We’ll let it go for now. Thai?”

 

Abby takes the plate for Joe while Luka bends down to pick him up. Joe puts his hands on both sides of Luka’s head and grins. “Sorry Tata.” Luka grins back and kisses him. “It’s okay.” He settles Joe in his chair and hands him a spoon.

 

By the time he sits, Abby has the Thai split between them. “So Halloween is coming up soon.”

 

“Huh?”

 

“Halloween, Luka. You know, ghosts and vampires and witches.”

 

“Right. What about it?”

 

“I was thinking we should all dress up.” She smiles when Luka just stares. “Come on. It’ll be fun. We could do a theme.”

 

“Are you sure you haven’t switched bodies with someone else?”

 

“No. I like Halloween.”

 

Luka gives her a leer. “Do you still have your nasty nurse costume?”

 

She watches him as she takes a bite of shrimp. “Old-fashioned nurse. And maybe I do.”

 

Luka grins at her. “Okay. Sure. It might be fun. What do you want to dress up as?”

 

“Let me give it some thought. Jake’s interview was this morning.”

 

“How did it go?”

 

“Pretty sure Michaels is going to offer him the job.” She smiles at Luka with a laugh in her eyes. “She did mention that I really upgraded when I snagged you.”

 

Luka raises his eyebrows. “Snagged me? I distinctly recall moving on you first. And getting you pregnant.”

 

Abby reaches over and squeezes his fingers. “All part of my master plan.”

 

“Me getting you pregnant was part of your plan?”

 

“No. That was a shocker. I admit it.” She takes another bite of Thai. “But the process was awfully fun.”

 

Luka grins at her. “I enjoyed the hell out of it.”

 

“Really? I never would have guessed.” Abby laughs when he wiggles his brows at her. “My point is, I had always planned on telling you how I felt. Eventually. Maybe.”

 

Luka sits back and laughs. “No you didn’t. We both would have kept on being stupid and pretending to just be friends. But then you came over and yelled at me. I had to kiss you to shut you up.”

 

“See? Master plan.” Abby grins at him and digs back into her Thai.

  
  
  



	13. Chapter 13

 

“So, Abby. Tell me about your relationship with Luka.”

 

Abby is sitting in the same spot she had taken before in Anders’ office, exhausted from a brutal week at work. She has had to reschedule this appointment once already, but wasn’t really in the mood today, either. 

 

“What do you want to know? We only have an hour.”

 

Anders grins at Abby’s attempt at humor. “How about you start at the beginning.”

 

Abby smiles in spite of herself. “I geeked out and kissed him in the ambulance bay at work.”

 

“Really?”

 

Abby relaxes a bit at the memory. “Yeah. He was...I guess he was trying to encourage me. It was right after I had been kicked out of Med School because my idiot ex refused to help me pay for it. We’d had a brutal shift where he let me do some procedures that nurses aren’t supposed to do.” She smiles again. “Our boss chewed his ass for it. So we were just taking a break, and he told me that I was going to be a great doctor. And yeah. I leaned over and planted one on him.”

 

“And how did he react to that?”

 

“Like I had punched him in the nose. And then we laughed it off and I got called back inside. I asked him out a few days later.”

 

“Luka mentioned that your first date didn’t go so well.”

 

Abby clears her throat. “No. Well, it was pretty great at first. I kicked his ass at foosball, and then he very adorably fumbled his way through some flirting. Right before he kissed  _ me. _ ”

 

“That sounds nice.”

 

“It was. We decided to take a walk along the river and this guy came out of nowhere with a pipe. He swung it at me and tried to take my purse. Luka….Luka went a little crazy and pulled the guy off of me. They scuffled for awhile until Luka got the upper hand and then...well. It wasn’t pretty. We got the guy to the hospital and he died.”

 

“What were your feelings about that?” 

 

Abby ponders that for a minute. “I don’t know. I was worried about Luka. I didn’t really know much about him at that point. But I had heard things here and there. About his family being killed and how he’d been through the war.” She shrugs. “I guess I figured that was part of it. And I knew he was only trying to help me.”

 

Anders looks at her pointedly. “Were you afraid?” 

 

“Never of Luka. At least...I wasn’t afraid he was going to hurt me. If that makes sense.”

 

“It does.”

 

“I was afraid of the other guy, and afraid of Luka’s reaction. And...after. He pulled back from everything. Work, me. I didn’t know how to help him.”

 

“What happened to get him back on track?”

 

Abby’s eyes soften. “I tracked him down at his hotel. He lived in a hotel then. I just wanted to make sure he was okay. And maybe give him some comfort.”

 

Anders nods. “And did you?” 

 

Abby shakes her head a little. “Yeah. We were uh, together, for the first time that night.” She smiles. “He told me after our first session a few weeks ago that he started falling in love with me when that happened.”

 

Anders smiles at her. “I’m glad he was able to tell you that.”

 

“Yeah. We never said the words much. And we  _ never _ said them the first time we were together. He said it in Croatian a few times.” Abby frowns abruptly. She had just now put that together.

 

“Did you know what he was saying?” 

 

“No. I just realized it.” She gives a snort of laughter. “The asshole.”

 

Anders throws back her head and laughs. “Well, you know now.”

 

“Yeah.” Abby grins at the thought of how she’d make Luka pay for it. “My point was, we didn’t say it much. Even after we had Joe and were living together. Neither of us are very good at expressing our feelings.”

 

Anders nods. “Understandable, with your pasts.”

 

Abby shrugs. “I guess.” She shakes her head. “So anyways. We were together for about a year. My mother showed up. I didn’t handle it well.”

 

“Again. Understandable.”

 

“No. I mean I didn’t handle it well with Luka. He kept trying to help me, and I kept pushing him away. Because at that point...at that point I  _ knew  _ he could hurt me too.”

 

Anders smiles. “Alright. Go on.”

 

“Sure. Well, I let Carter do his Carter thing. I could see that it hurt Luka that I leaned on John so much. But Carter was safe. Safe in a way that Luka wasn’t.”

 

Anders frowns. “What do you mean by that?” 

 

Abby fumbles a bit. “I was falling in love with Luka. He had that power to hurt me, and I couldn’t...no. I  _ didn’t  _ handle it very well. If I was in love, I wasn’t in control. I wasn’t in love with John. He was my friend, and I  _ knew  _ he had feelings for me, but I didn’t feel for him what I felt for Luka. It was safe to take his help because he couldn’t hurt me that way.”

 

Anders nods again. “Alright that makes sense. Tell me more about Carter. Luka called him an ‘interloper’ in your relationship.”

 

Abby snorts. “Yeah. I guess you could put it that way. John and I were friends. He was an addict, and I was an alcoholic. We went to meetings together, and I sponsored him for awhile.”

 

Anders holds up a hand. “I thought men and women weren’t supposed to sponsor each other.”

 

Abby nods. “With good reason. Which I quickly realized when I understood how Carter felt about me.” She sighs. “It was all kinds of stupid looking back on it. Carter and Luka started doing this weird, competitive thing. Not only personally, but professionally too. It got sticky a few times. Luka was the attending, but Carter had been there longer than pretty much anyone, so he got away with stuff. Luka never let him, and was kind of an ass about it. They participated in a duel once.” She grins at the memory.

 

Anders opens her mouth, shuts it again. 

 

“Yeah. Pretty much.” Abby laughs. “It’s a long story. But basically, they were idiots whenever they were around each other.” Abby gives a smile. “Until the Congo.”

 

“John went to the Congo too?”

 

“Yeah. At that point, Carter and I were together. We were having a lot of problems. Basically because I couldn’t measure up to the fantasy he had built of me.” She shrugs. “His grandmother died. I brought my brother with me to the funeral and…” Abby shudders at the memory. “Anyways, he was angry. We had a huge fight and he decided to go help Luka in the Congo for awhile.”

 

“How did that make you feel?”

 

“I was fucking pissed.” She grins when Anders snorts with laughter. “Luka had already left me to go to that Godforsaken place, and now Carter was too. I was hurt, and angry, and I felt abandoned by both of them. Two of the people I cared about the most in the world.”

 

“It must have been difficult for you.”

 

Abby nods and she feels tears prick behind her lids. “I was so angry with both of them. Luka, because at that point he was my best friend. And Carter because...well. I thought I was in love with him.” She frowns. “I wasn’t. Ever.”

 

“Luka said the same thing about…” Anders checks her notes. “Sam, was it?”

 

Abby catches herself before she rolls her eyes. “Yeah.”

 

“Hmmm. Interesting. We’ll get into that parallel another time. Go on.”

 

“Well, Carter came back home for about five minutes before we got the news that Luka was dead.” Abby squeezes her eyes shut, because reliving that moment always breaks her heart. “He went back to retrieve Luka’s body. He found him alive, instead. That’s when I realized that I loved Luka and always had.” She shrugs. “Not that I really ever intended to tell him. Carter stayed back in the Congo, and Luka came home with a letter for me from him, dumping me.”

 

“And a French Nurse?” Anders lifts a brow.

 

Abby snorts. “Yeah. Gillian. She was actually pretty great. I think she helped Luka figure some things out. I’m grateful to her for that. Anyways, after all of that, Carter wasn’t really a factor as far as me and Luka. They developed this strong friendship over their bonding over there. I don’t know. Like this war-time camaraderie. We all ended up being friends. Carter married someone he met in Africa.” 

 

“Okay. Go back to when you broke up. Luka told me what happened, and what was said.”

 

Abby shrugs. “We were both really angry that night. And for a few nights after. When I finally got up the nerve to call him….” She frowns. “Nicole answered.”

 

“Nicole?” Anders lifts a brow.

 

“The waitress he’d been flirting with the night we broke up.” Abby rolls her eyes. “God, I was  _ pissed.  _  Then I was humiliated. I’d been with the guy for over a year. I thought I was falling in love with him, and I thought he’d had the same feelings for me. And then he’s sleeping with this bitch five minutes after we broke up. She answered, and I thought I had the wrong number. I called back, and she answered again, and I asked for him. She asked who I was, so I asked who  _ she  _ was.” Abby rolls her eyes at the memory. “She finally gave him the phone after telling him I wouldn’t say who I was. The bitch.” She sighs. “When he got on the line, I hung up. I don’t know if he knew it was me or not. He never mentioned it.” Abby shrugs. 

 

Anders nods. “I would have been angry too.”

 

Abby shrugs. “I found out later that she was just staying at his place. He wasn’t sleeping with her. Yet.”

 

“Yet?”

 

Abby shifts uncomfortably, and then sighs. “According to him, it just happened.” 

 

“Abby? What aren’t you telling me?”

 

Abby sighs again. “Look. I’ve struggled with this for a lot of years. It still bothers me sometimes.”

 

“That Luka had sex with Nicole right after you broke up?” Anders’ brow is furrowed in confusion. 

 

“No. I got over that part fairly quickly. She told him she was pregnant.”

 

“Was she?”

 

“Yeah. But I...I didn’t believe her. Luka was doing all of these things for her, getting her a job, letting her stay with him, and I just thought she was using him. And I would  _ not  _ stand for it. I stlll cared about him and I wasn’t going to let her take advantage of his giving nature. I knew he wanted kids again, so much.” Abby lets her tears fall this time. “I figured she knew too, so I confronted her about it.”

 

Anders reaches over and hands Abby a box of tissues.

 

She wipes her eyes. “A few days later, Luka told me she was gone. That the pregnancy had been a lie, and she had gone home to her family.”

 

“But that wasn’t true?”

 

Abby shakes her head. “No. I had to take a patient up to OB. Nicole was there. She was in recovery for an abortion.” She shudders a bit. “I’ve tried to tell myself for years that it probably wasn’t even his baby. The timing was tight. But that doesn’t change the fact that I’ve kept it from him all this time.”

 

Anders takes a breath and shifts her legs. “Alright. Abby, listen. Have you ever told anyone all of this before?” She nods as Abby shakes her head. “I’m glad you told me and got it off your conscious. Now. This wasn’t and isn’t your story to tell. It was Nicole’s.”

 

“But I’m the one who forced her hand…”

 

“No. You didn’t. She made that choice. Nicole is the one who should have told Luka all of this. The fact that you simply  _ know _ about it doesn’t change it. What would telling him accomplish?”

 

Abby shakes her head. “Absolutely nothing.”

 

“Exactly. This isn’t and wasn’t your fault. You need to let that go. If you were decide to tell him someday, it wouldn’t change anything, and it would probably hurt him deeply. Not because of your choice, but hers.”

 

Abby nods and then jolts as a timer goes off.

 

“Alright. That’s all of our time. I realize we aren’t even close to finished with this.”

 

Abby sniffles a bit and then snickers. “I told you.”

 

Anders nods. “You did. We’ll continue it at our next individual session. Now. I gave Luka some ‘homework’ I suppose you’d call it. Did he complete it?”

 

“You mean did he finally realize that he should probably tell me how he felt about me as opposed to how he felt about me and Joe?” She smiles. “Yeah. He did.” 

 

“Good. Now I have some for you. Tell Luka why you really broke up, that first time. I think it will help. And please start working on letting any guilt over the Nicole thing go.”

 

Abby ponders and nods. “Alright.” She stands to leave. “Thanks.”

 

“Of course. I’ll see you next week, with Luka.”

  
  


**Notes for the Chapter:**

> The phone call that Abby makes to Luka’s is from a deleted scene. So it’s not “technically” canon, but I still think it happened. 😏


	14. Chapter 14

“Yeah. I’m glad to hear that.” Luka smiles as Archie keeps rambling in his ear about how great everyone is doing at County. He laughs at Archie’s comment that Frank needs to lay off the donuts. “Well, we’ve been telling him that for years. It never seemed to matter.” He looks up from where he’s sitting at the kitchen table when Abby comes in. Luka lifts a brow when she reaches for the notebook he’s been jotting things down in and slaps it shut. He grins at her when she scowls at him. “Okay. Listen, Morris. Abby’s home. We’ll send you a check.” He listens for another minute. “Sure. Let us know when, and we’ll try to make it. Give our best to everyone. Yeah. Bye.” Luka hangs up the phone.

 

“Morris?” Abby is still scowling a bit when she turns from greeting Joe. 

 

“Yeah. They’ve worked out the details for that scholarship. They want to do a dedication thing. Early next year maybe.”

 

Abby nods. “Okay. What’s up with the notebook?”

 

“That’s for me to know.” He grins when her frown deepens and leans down to kiss her. “How was your day?”

 

“Don’t try to change the subject.” She makes a grab for the book.

 

Luka chuckles. “Seriously? I’m not allowed any privacy around here?” 

 

Abby sighs. “Of course you are. Sorry.”

 

He shakes his head. “It’s fine. I made some notes about our Halloween costumes. I had some questions for Archie about them.”

 

Abby holds up her hands. “Hold on.  _ You’re  _ planning our costumes? You don’t even like Halloween.”

 

Luka shrugs. “Sure I do. It’s pretty American, but it’s fun. I just want to do it, okay? I promise not to make you embarrassed.”

 

Abby grins at him. “Okay. Are we going to be Vampires?”

 

Luka stares at her. “Why would you think that?”

 

She chuckles. “Kind of an easy leap to make. Eastern European lore and all.”

 

He narrows his eyes at her. “You do realize Transylvania is nowhere near Croatia, right?”

 

“Nope. It’s all the same to me.” Abby laughs when he casts his eyes to the ceiling. “I’m kidding, Luka. Of course I know that.” Mostly. “So what are we going to be, then?”

 

“That’s for me to know and you to find out.” He leans over to kiss her again. “Trust me, huh?”

 

Abby shrugs. “Fine. Did you eat?”

 

“We were waiting for you.” Luka rises to go to the oven to pull out the frozen lasagna he’d had warming. “Get Joe. This is ready.”

 

Abby manages to tear Joe’s attention away from his blocks to get him in his seat. “Movie, Mama.” 

 

At her quizzical look, Luka shrugs. “I told him he could have a movie after dinner if he was good. He was.” He ruffles Joe's hair as he sits a plate in front of him. “We’re both off tomorrow. It won’t hurt him to stay up for a bit. He’s been pretty wound up tonight. Maybe he’ll sleep in for a bit in the morning.”

 

Abby nods and takes a bite of lasagna. It should be disgusting, but it’s pretty good. “So. I figured something out in my session today.”

 

“Hmm?” Luka is distracted, wondering why Joe thinks it’s a good way to eat lasagna by peeling the layers apart.

 

“Volim Te.”

 

Luka looks at her with that soft look he gets. “You didn’t mangle it.”

 

Abby smiles and shakes her head. “No. I figured it out.”

 

He’s completely confused. “You figured out what it means? Abby, I’ve been saying that to you, and to Joe, for a long time. I’ve told you what it means.”

 

“No. I know what it means. Now. I just didn’t  _ always  _ know.” She raises her brows at him.

 

Luka shifts a bit uncomfortably. “Busted, huh?”

 

She laughs. “Yeah. I think the first time you said it was about a month after we started dating. We’d both had a shitty day, and we had an argument over something stupid.” Abby shrugs. “I have no idea what. We went to bed, and you...well. You apologized non-verbally.” He grins at her and she grins back. “You said it right after. I was used to you muttering in Croatian at that point, but for some reason those words stuck in my head. I didn’t know what it meant, but I knew it was something sweet.”

 

Luka reaches over and caresses her hand. “Why didn’t you just ask?”

 

Abby rolls her eyes. “Because. You’d have said it in English if it was important. And we didn’t have Google Translate back then.”

 

Luka watches her. “It  _ was  _ important. That’s why I couldn’t say it in English.”

 

She nods and sighs. “Yeah. I guess I get that. Anyways, I just put it together in Monica’s office. You always said it when you were especially emotional. I remember that now.”

 

Luka sighs this time. “Abby. We were both such a mess back then…”

 

“Back then?”

 

He gives a half laugh. “You know what I mean. I didn’t want to fu..” he glances at Joe “ _ mess _ things up or scare you away.” 

 

Abby smiles at him and nods. “It probably would have.”

 

“Exactly.” He touches his tongue to his top lip in a gesture she secretly adores. “I, ah. I should have told you anyways.”

 

“I don’t know if that’s true.” She takes another bite of lasagna. Waves her fork at him. “I don’t know if we’d be  _ here  _ if you had.”

 

“In Boston?”

 

“Shut up.” She grins when he laughs. “I mean here. You and me and Joe. We don’t know  _ exactly  _ when I got pregnant. We can surmise that it was fairly quickly after that first night when I came over to yell at you about Clemente. If not that night.” She frowns. “Do you ever think about the fact that  _ Victor Clemente  _ might be the reason we have what we have?”

 

“All the time. But we can talk about that later.” Luka smiles and nods. “Odds are for you getting pregnant then. Or the night of Neela’s wedding. But the timing is tight for that one.” 

 

“Yeah. So who knows what would have happened if we’d stayed together the first time? Would we have made it work? Would we have made another baby sooner? Would we have  _ him _ if we had done that? You’re the believer in fate. What do you think?”

 

Luka pushes his plate away, and scoots his chair closer to her. He glances at Joe who is grinning at them and babbling with sauce all over his face. And Luka is suddenly absolutely certain that they couldn’t have done it any other way. “No. I think...I think that while I’ll always regret that we didn’t have that time together...we still had it.”

 

Her brows furrow. “What?”

 

“I mean…” He blows out a breath. “I mean that I think things had to happen exactly as they did. I think the friendship that we built while we were apart makes us stronger as a couple. We already meant so much to each other….and well? It makes that connection deeper, right?”

 

Abby nods, because she’d come to the same conclusion.

 

“Being with other people just...it helped us both understand what we  _ really _ meant to each other.” He smiles at her. “And then the stars aligned just right and gave us both a kick in the ass.”

 

“Ass!” 

 

Luka is startled when Joe blurts out the word and then groans. “Great.” He mutters. 

 

“Ass, Tata!”

 

“No, Joe. Tata said  _ sass _ .” Abby snickers. She figures a little white lie can’t hurt. And she’s amused. She can’t help it. She’d figured it was only a matter of time before Joe started swearing. She and Luka both had potty mouths.

 

“No, mama. Ass.” Joe nods decisively. 

 

Luka shakes his head. “Well. I guess we had better start watching our mouths. Incredibles or Toy Story, Joe?” It was a desperate attempt to change the subject, and he knew it. 

 

Joe quickly changes gears and looks thoughtful. “Credibles.” 

 

Luka nods. “How about we all get into our PJ’s and we’ll set it up.”

 

Abby smiles at him. “If you want to handle that, I’ll clean up.”

 

Luka nods and scoops Joe up, making him laugh like a maniac when he hangs him upside down and charges up the stairs.

 

Abby feels a warm glow in her chest as she rinses the plates to stack them in the dishwasher. She’s not much for sentiment, but Luka’s exactly right. Things worked out exactly as they were supposed to. 

 

When she finishes, she finds Joe and Luka already stretched out on the couch. Luka tosses a pair of pajamas at her. “This way you don’t have to go upstairs.”

 

“Thanks.” Abby moves behind the couch to strip her clothes off and pull on the PJ’s. Luka tips his head back to watch, and though she rolls her eyes, her body tingles a little. He’s always watched her do simple things. Change her clothes, brush her hair, get ready for bed. With a look in his eyes that tells her she’s his focus. That simple thing is one of the biggest reasons why she was so lost in love with him that she’d never find her way out. And she didn’t want to. 

 

Abby drops down on the couch next to them. Luka lifts his arm so she can snuggle into his side. With his wife and son on either side of him, Luka contentedly settles in to watch The Incredibles save the world from Syndrome.”Volim Te.” He tells them both.

 

**********************************

 

Abby cracks one eye open to find Luka still sprawled out next to her with his mouth open and snoring. It’s exceedingly rare for them to both still be in bed when she wakes. He’s usually up long before she is. She shifts a bit, up on her elbow and watches him sleep. He looks so peaceful. He isn’t always, she’s well aware. Luka still has nightmares from his time in the war, and what happened to Danijela and the kids. All she can do is hold him through them, and try to give him comfort. It’s easier now than it used to be. He seems to know that he doesn’t need to be embarrassed anymore when he’s come out of one. He simply gives in and lets her take care of him. Sometimes she just holds him, stroking his hair. Other times they make love. Whatever it takes to sooth him when they happen.

 

But this morning, he’s peaceful. And God. So beautiful. Abby grins at the fanciful thought that pops into her head that the gods must have had a summit on how to create the most gorgeous man they could. And they’d come up with Luka Kovac. His long lashes were lying on his strong cheekbones. The morning light playing on the slant of his nose and jaw. The growth of beard only lending a dangerous edge to his handsomeness. Abby’s desire for him begins to stir. No reason to let him sleep while she was wide awake. 

 

She grins as she quietly slides down under the covers. He’s wearing only his boxers, and what do you know? The slide of her hand over the waistband to tug it down causes him to stir. Men are so predictable that way. Abby takes his length in her hand and smiling, gets to work with her mouth.

 

Luka’s body is reacting before he has any idea what’s happening. He only knows that there is deep pleasure. His eyes flutter open and he reaches over and lifts his head…”Abby?” He all of a sudden understands what’s happening and groans. His head falls back while he reaches down with a hand to stroke her hair. 

 

Abby feels a profound sense of power as she continues to work him with lips and tongue, and a little bit of teeth. She knows he’s close, as his hips are starting to jerk and the grip on her hair is tighter. But he doesn’t push, doesn’t insist on shoving and tugging, which is one of the reasons she enjoys this particular act so much with him.

 

When she hears his strangled moan, Abby kisses her way up his belly to his mouth. She presses her lips to his in a sweet kiss. “Good morning.” She whispers, smiling down at him. 

 

Luka grins fiercely at her and drags her mouth to his. She quickly sheds her pajama pants and straddles him, taking him deep inside her. She groans into his mouth and then rears up. Pushing his shoulders back so his head hits the pillow again. She watches him as she begins to move. Slowly at first, letting the burn in his eyes spur her on. 

 

Luka knows he is ready to explode. But he holds on, and holds out. Letting Abby lead the way. She looks so beautiful, riding him. Her eyes are closed, and her hair is hanging loose over her shoulders. Her hands are planted on his chest as she uses her hips to set a furious pace. He slides his hands up her sides to cup her breasts. He smiles as her eyes flutter open to watch him again. His thumbs tracing light circles around the peaks of her nipples. He hears her moan and sigh.

 

Luka rears up, forcing Abby to wrap her legs around his waist as his mouth latches hungrily on her breast to replace his hands.  _ “Luka…” _ Abby feels herself starting to shatter, and drags his mouth back to hers. His hands bury themselves in her hair and with one final thrust, they fall over the edge together.

 

They stay tangled together in an upright position for a moment, until Luka decides that holding them both that way is too much work at this hour of the morning. He flops back on the pillow, taking her with him and making her laugh. “Good morning, indeed.” He grins up at her, as she’s still sprawled on top of him. In fact, he’s still inside her. “What brought that on?”

 

Abby crosses her arms on his chest and rests her head on them, looking at him. “I woke up. I didn’t think it was fair that you were still sleeping.” 

 

“Ah. It was for selfish reasons, then.” 

 

“Of course.” Abby shifts so he is able to slide out of her. She curls into his side. “And I was thinking about how pretty you are, and how I really should take advantage of that every chance I get.” 

 

Luka smiles and strokes her hair. “I appreciate being able to enjoy the fringe benefits of your satisfaction.” 

 

Abby snickers and traces her fingers over his chest. “I think that rates higher on the scale than  _ fringe.” _

 

_ “ _ Of course it does.” He turns his head to grin at her. “Want breakfast?”

 

“Mmm. Not for awhile. Too early.”

 

“Coffee?”

 

“Yeah. That’d be good.” She murmurs it a bit sleepily. Luka leans over to kiss her and tosses the covers aside. “Check on Joe. I haven’t heard anything out of him.”

 

Luka tosses a grin over his shoulder as he pulls his pajama pants on. “How could you hear anything over the moaning?”

 

“Shut up.” She grins as he heads out the bedroom door. The man has a truly fantastic body. It’s interesting to her that he only gets better with age. One of life’s unfair foibles, she supposes. Men got better looking while women started shifting. She glances down at her herself. She knows she’s lucky, as she’s always been small, so even at forty, her breasts hadn’t started sagging much. Abby realizes it’s something to thank Maggie for. She definitely took after her mother in that regard. Same goes for her skin. She had some lines, but fewer than a lot of women her age. She realizes that she needs to call her mother…Abby reaches over and pulls her t-shirt back over her head. 

 

Her thoughts are still rambling when Luka comes in with two mugs of coffee. He hands one to her and stretches out next to her, propped against the headboard. “Joe’s still out. He was up late last night.” He shrugs and takes a sip of his coffee.

 

“Whose fault is that?” Abby wiggles so she’s sitting up next to him.

 

“Mine. What were you just thinking about?”

 

“How unfair it is that you’re older than I am and you keep getting better looking while I’m sliding down the back edge of forty.” 

 

Luka gives her a look that manages to combine tenderness, amusement, and a touch of exasperation. “What?”

 

“No, really. It’s not fair that men always seem to get better with age while we just shift and sag.”

 

“Abby. You’re just as beautiful now as you were the day I met you.” He picks up her hand and brings it to his lips. “More. Because I know how beautiful you are inside too.”

 

She sighs. “Sweet talker.”

 

“I’m serious.” He knows she’s mostly joking, but he also knows she can be insecure about her looks. And he hadn’t helped that the night he’d told her she wasn’t that pretty. Luka sighs and cups her cheek. “I wish you wouldn’t think otherwise.”

 

Abby nods. “I know it. It’s stupid. And I was mostly joking.” She sighs and realizes this is a decent transition for the “homework” Monica had given her. “Ah, listen. Anders said something yesterday. That I should tell you something about why we broke up that first time.”

 

“We broke up because I was a jealous, oblivious idiot.”

 

Abby shakes her head. “No. Well, that’s part of it. But it was more about me. I picked a fight with you..”

 

“Abby.” Luka is starting to get frustrated. “I was the world’s biggest asshole that night. I flirted with another woman, right in your face. Then I ignored you.”

 

“Yeah. Well..yeah. But I had already decided to be a bitch. And I realized a long time ago that it was because I  _ wanted  _ to push you away.”

 

Luka rolls his eyes. “You think I didn’t know that?”

 

“No. I know you knew it. But I don’t know if you really know the reasons.”

 

Luka picks up her hand again. “I guess not. Tell me.”

 

“Things were starting to get really uncomfortable for me.” She laughs when Luka snorts. “I know. But they were getting that way because I knew you could hurt me.”

 

“I  _ did  _ hurt you.”

 

Abby shakes her head again. “Yeah, but it was on the surface. I knew if I let things go on the way they were, you could slice me to the bone. It scared me, Luka. That’s why I started letting Carter help me instead of you. I knew that if I  _ really  _ let you in, I’d lose what was left of the control I had.”

 

Luka nods and sets his empty cup aside. He reaches over to take hers and sits it next to his. He draws her close to his side. “Love is scary.” He murmurs.

 

Abby closes her eyes. “Tell me about it.” 

 

Luka grins and chuckles. “Abby, I knew almost all of that. But thank you for telling me.”

 

“You did?”

 

He rests his cheek on the top of her head. “Yeah. Not while it was happening. Or even for awhile after. I think I realized it when you were with Carter. You seemed so happy with him…”

 

“I wasn’t, not really.  Not...not  _ really _ deep-down-in-the-gut happy. Like I am with you.”

 

He nods. “I know that too. But you put on a good show. And you seemed more relaxed with him. It occurred to me that it was because he didn’t scare you the way I did. We were both afraid of our feelings back then.”

 

Abby sighs. “We’re going to have a really deep talk about the whole Carter thing at some point, aren’t we?”

 

Luka snickers. “Probably. Sam too.”

 

“I don’t wanna.”

 

He lets out a snort this time. “I don’t particularly want to either. But they’re part of our pasts together.”

 

“Yeah. But let’s just not do it today.”

 

Luka leans over to kiss her. “Deal. Let’s get moving and find something fun to do.”

  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  



	15. Chapter 15

“So this is why you make the big bucks and I make squat?”

 

Luka opens his eyes from the couch in the lounge and sees Gorsch grinning at him. Closes them again. “A resident’s salary is hardly  _ squat.  _ I’m on lunch. What do you want?”

 

“Coffee.”

 

Luka waves a hand. “You know where it is. Why are you interrupting my nap?”

 

Gorsch snickers. “Didn’t know I was, my man.”

 

Luka sighs and rubs his face. “Sorry. It’s been a long couple of days.”

 

“Great. Something to look forward to. The schedule doesn’t get easier.”

 

Luka grins at him. “Sure it does. But I’ve got a cranky wife and a cranky kid at home, too.”

 

Gorsch cracks a smile. “Cranky, huh?”

 

Luka sits up and runs his hand through his hair. “Abby has a cold. She doesn’t do well with being sick. We all suffer for it.”

 

“I’m never getting married, so I’ll take your word for it.”

 

Luka snorts. “Whatever you say. I’ve heard that one before.”

 

“No, seriously. Why would I? All the women out there. Why tie yourself down?” Gorsch shakes his head.

 

Luka shrugs. “Some of us like being tied down. Even when our woman is cranky.” He rises and smooths his hands over his trousers. “I should probably call and check on her.” 

 

“Whatever. Hey. I heard you had an ossificans case. Progressive?”

 

“Not sure yet. It doesn’t look like it, but you never know.”

 

“I’ve never seen one. Can you walk me through the Dif when you get back?”

 

Luka smiles. “Sure. Give me ten.”

 

One of his favorite things about medicine is being able to teach young doctors. They caught on to the routine stuff fairly quickly….or they didn’t. But it was pretty damn cool when he had a rare case and could explain it to someone else. Luka pulls out his phone in the ambulance bay. 

 

“Hullo.”

 

“Hi. You still sound like shit.”

 

“Thanks.” He hears Abby blow her nose. “I think it’s getting better.”

 

“Uh huh. You’re still taking tomorrow off.”

 

“Luka…”

 

“Shut up. You could barely breathe this morning. I don’t want you progressing into pneumonia.”

 

“It won’t. It’s just a cold, Luka.”

 

“And you know very well what can happen if you don’t take care of yourself.” He smiles when he hears her huff out a breath. “I should be able to cut out early. I’ll make you some soup.”

 

“Fine. Are you picking Joe up?”

 

“I thought I’d let him stay at daycare. See what happens.”

 

“Ha. Funny.”

 

“Well don’t ask funny questions. I’ll see you in a couple of hours. Get some sleep, Abby.”

 

“Okay.”

 

Luka shakes his head and smiles when he ends the call. He knows very well how much she hates this. But she’d damn well do what he told her for once.

 

Daniels is coming out as Luka starts to head in. “Trauma coming in.”

 

Luka nods. “Can you handle it?”

 

Daniels snorts. “I’m the chief, right?”

 

“Right. Gorsch wanted me to walk him through the ossificans in four.”

 

Daniels nods. “It’s a good teaching case.”

 

“My thoughts exactly. So if you need either of us…”

 

“I know where to find you. Take him.”

 

Luka nods and heads inside. He checks with the patient in four, making sure it’s okay for him to go over everything again with a resident. As the patient is a teenager and his worried mother, they have no problem having things double checked. 

 

“Doctor Gorsch. I want you to go into this as if you don’t already know the diagnosis. 16 year old American football player…” Luka ignores Gorsch’s eyeroll at his ‘American’ qualifier. “blow to the upper quadriceps during a drill two weeks ago. Pain, loss of ROM at the hip, and eccymosis at the injury site. Zach here decided that he didn’t need to tell anyone, and kept playing.” Luka smiles at mom’s roll of her eyes. “Mass development within the last few days. What’s your plan?”

 

“X-ray?”

 

“Why?”

 

“I’d suspect a fracture based on that history.”

 

Luka nods. He’d expected that answer, and he’s glad Marcus is taking the history at face value. “A fracture where?”

 

Marcus hesitates. “Femoral neck?”

 

“Symptoms are in the quadriceps.”

 

“Femur.”

 

“Alright. X-ray is clear. It would be since there’s no possible way Zach was playing ball on a broken femur.” He smiles when Gorsch frowns at that. “What’s next?”

 

“Can I palpate?”

 

“Yeah. Probably should have asked to do that first.” He chuckles as Gorsch’s frown deepens. “It’s fine. You’re not the first to just order an X-ray at face value, and you won’t be the last.”

 

He watches closely as Marcus palpates Zach’s leg. Sees the patient jump when he hits the area.

 

“Mass in the upper middle of the RF.”

 

Luka nods. “Good. What’s next?”

 

“Zach, has this lump been shifting? Getting any bigger?”

 

“Nah. It just keeps getting harder. It moves around a little, but not much.”

 

“Ultrasound.”

 

“Why?” Luka asks.

 

Marcus sighs. “Because you can’t see soft tissue on X-ray.” 

 

“Exactly. Do you want to see the results?”

 

Gorsch nods and moves over beside Luka to study them. “There’s the shadow. Elongated mass. Typical of MO. Non-progressive based on the history of injury and location.”

 

Luka nods. “Zach is going to follow up with ortho. It looks like we caught it early enough that he won’t need surgery.”

 

“Biopsy?”

 

“That will be up to ortho, but I doubt it.”

 

Gorsch nods. “Good.”

 

Luka smiles at the patient and his mom. “We’ll have you out of here soon. Allie was getting you some crutches, and she’ll show you how to use them. You need to stay off this as much as possible until you see the orthopedic doctor and they give you further instructions. You probably have some physical therapy in your future, but it could have been worse.”

 

Luka leaves the room with Gorsch after thanks from Zach and his mom. “Remember your diagnostic order. You should have observed and palpated directly after history.”

 

“Yeah. I know it.” Marcus is chagrined. “Sorry, it was one of those things where I knew what it was and was trying not to.” He grins.

 

Luka grins back. “Sure. But don’t jump to radiography right away. Sometimes you can diagnose clinically without adding expense to the patient’s bill.”

 

“Don’t let Daniels hear you say that.”

 

“Daniels knows where I stand on unnecessary testing. He hired me anyways.” Luka puts a hand on Marcus’s shoulder. “Nice job though. Cool, huh?”

 

Gorsch grins. “Very cool. Thanks for walking me through it.”

 

Luka nods and smiles. He notes Daniels coming out of Trauma one and catches him. “Hey. How much of my soul do I need to sell to get out of here early?”

 

Daniels waves a hand at him. “None of it. Consider it your payment for always staying later when I need you.” He picks up a chart at the desk. “We’re dead in here today anyways.”

 

“Great. Abby has a cold. I need to pick up Joe and get home to her.”

 

Daniels studies him. “You’re a worry-wart aren’t you?”

 

Luka smiles a little. “I guess so. I’ve always had reasons to worry.”

 

Daniels nods. “I get it. Give us another hour and then you can skip.”

 

Luka finishes up and heads out, stopping at the market for supplies on his way to pick up his son. He walks into the daycare to the sound of screaming kids. He notes Joe running full tilt toward him. “Tata!”

 

“Hey.” Luka gives a little grunt when Joe hits his legs and attaches himself. He bends to pick him up. “How are you?”

 

“Kenny hit Tata.”

 

Luka deciphers this to mean that Kenny had hit Joe. He raises a brow at the frazzled provider.

 

“I’m sorry Doctor Kovač. They hit each other. I have no idea who started it. But they’ve both been in time-out for a half-hour.”

 

Luka nods and pulls Joe, who is clinging to his neck, back to study him. “Did you hit Kenny, Joe? You know it’s not okay to hit somebody, especially your friends.” Luka nearly grins when he thinks of the people he’s punched, with good reason. But...not a good lesson to teach Joe at two.

 

“Kenny hit  _ me.”  _ Joe screws up his face in petulant lines. 

 

Luka sighs. “Fine.” He nods to the worker. “I’ll take care of it. It won’t happen again.”

 

“Thank you. I’ll talk to Kenny’s parents too.”

 

Luka nods as he signs Joe out and gathers his things. Once he has Joe strapped in his seat, he gets behind the wheel and starts maneuvering toward home. “Josip Kovač, you know better than to hit people.”

 

Joe kicks his feet and glares at his father, Which Luka catches in the rear-view. “Hit  _ me.” _

 

Luka shakes his head. “That doesn’t matter. You should have told your teacher.”

 

Luka sighs as the tears start up again. “Took Woody.”

 

“Okay. That’s no reason to hit your friend, is it?”

 

Joe scrunches up his face and then seems defeated. “No, Tata.”

 

“You’re going to say sorry to Kenny tomorrow, and this isn’t going to happen again.” Luka nods as Joe gives him a pitiful look. “Good.”

 

Luka pulls into the driveway musing on how much he  _ hates _ being the disciplinarian. Abby usually takes care of it. He frowns as he realizes that she probably hates it too. He gets Joe out of his seat. “Now you’re going up to your room to sit quietly while I make dinner. Mama’s sick, and you’re still in trouble.” He gathers the market bags. 

 

Joe nods his head on Luka’s shoulder. Probably worn out, Luka thinks. He finds Abby sleeping on the couch and takes Joe straight upstairs where he settles him with a book. Abby is stirring when he gets back down. He moves straight to her. “Hey. Lay back down.”

 

Abby scowls at him. “I’m fine. Just groggy.”

 

“You’re not.” He feels her forehead, relieved to find it cool.

 

“I don’t have a feber.” 

 

Luka grins at the word. “Just checking. Want some cough medicine?”

 

Abby shakes her head. “No. Alcohol.”

 

Luka sighs. Of course there was alcohol in cough suppressants. “Tea?”

 

Abby nods. “I’ll get it.” She sits up and immediately starts coughing. 

 

Luka pushes her back down. “Lie down and shut up.”

 

“Luka, I need to get off this couch. I’m going to get bedsores.”

 

He snorts as he moves to the kitchen. “Stop being a drama princess.”

 

Abby laughs and immediately starts coughing again. She rolls her eyes. “It’s drama queen. And don’t forget it.” She rolls to her side so she can see him. He puts the tea kettle on and then gets out a large pot to fill with water. “What are you making?”

 

“Chicken soup.” He pulls a chicken out of the bag he’d set on the floor, adds seasoning and the bird to the pot, and turns the flame on. 

 

She smiles. “It makes me happy every day that I married somebody who actually knows how to cook.”

 

Luka laughs. “You’d just eat pop-tarts and ramen and wear yourself out even more if you didn’t have me.”

 

“That’s true.” Abby smiles at him when he brings her a cup of tea doctored with lemon and honey. “How was your day?”

 

“Fine. Slow. We had an Ossificans, so I walked Gorsch through the dif. He catches on quick.”

 

Abby nods. Luka was a great teacher and he tended to latch on to certain students and residents. She knows as she’d been one of them. “That’s good.”

 

“Yeah. Joe’s in time-out upstairs.”

 

Abby tries to sit up again. He pushes her back. “Luka, stop it. I want to sit up.”

 

He nods and lets her.

 

“Why is he in time-out?”

 

“He hit Kenny. Or Kenny hit him. Over Woody. It’s not entirely clear.”

 

“He  _ hit  _ Kenny?”

 

Luka nods. “Yeah. The daycare is going to talk to his parents, and I took care of it with Joe.”

 

“How?”

 

Luka huffs out a breath. “Abby, I do know how to discipline our son.”

 

“Yeah, but…”

 

“Really. He’s mad at me still, but he’s going to say sorry to Kenny tomorrow and it won’t happen again.”

 

Abby sighs. “Fine.” She sips her tea and watches him. “You’re kind of proud of him, aren’t you.”

 

Luka gives her a smirk. “Hey. I never hit my friends.”

 

“Carter.”

 

“That was before we were friends. And he started it.” He laughs at Abby’s eyeroll, and leans over to kiss her forehead. “Fine. Point taken. But usually I only hit people over you. That was about you, too.”

 

Abby is both thrilled and annoyed by the protective side of him. He was normally so gentle, partially due to his size she knows. He was afraid of hurting someone accidentally. She asks him a question that’s been on her mind for years. “Was it you who kicked Brian’s ass?”

 

Luka looks at her, surprised. “Yes. I thought you knew.”

 

She nods. “I suspected. It’s nice to have confirmation.”

 

“I’m sorry he got out of jail time because of it.” He strokes her hair. “I thought you’d be upset with me. That’s why I never mentioned it.”

 

Abby shakes her head. “I was at first. But he moved away, and Joyce divorced him. It worked out.”

 

Luka draws her closer. “It might not have.”

 

“No, but it did. It didn’t seem worth it to bring it up.” She shifts to look up at him. “And I kind of liked the idea that you did it.”

 

Luka nods and rests his head on hers. “He hurt you. I hate seeing any violence against women. We deal with it much too often. But it was  _ you _ . I couldn’t let it go.”

 

Abby nods. “Okay. Why don’t you go up and get Joe? He’s probably been punished enough.”

 

Luka squeezes her hand. “Sure. Stay where you are.”

 

“Fine.” Abby settles back with her tea. It was nice to be taken care of. 

  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  



	16. Chapter 16

“Hey. Feeling better?”

 

Abby glances up from her charts at the desk and smiles at Sophie. “Nearly a hundred percent. Luka poured enough chicken soup into me, I feared I’d start to cluck.”

 

“That’s sweet.” Sophie smiles at her as she checks the board. “Must be nice having someone take care of you.”

 

Abby sighs a little. “It is. Even when he’s annoying.”

 

“How could you possibly ever be annoyed with a man who looks like that?” Sophie grins at her.

 

“It’s easier than you’d think.” Abby mutters. “Could you get a history on the little girl in three?”

 

“Sure. It’s good to have you back doctor Lockhart.”

 

“Thanks.” Abby keeps charting as Michaels walks up.

 

“You look better.” Dawn smiles at her. “Trick or treating tonight?”

 

Abby rolls her eyes. “Yeah. I brought up Halloween and Luka jumped on it. Now he won’t tell me what we’re going to be. I’m a little scared.”

 

Michaels laughs. “I’m sure it will be fun.”

 

Abby smiles at her. “Sure. As long as he doesn’t dress me as a French Maid or something.”

 

Michaels snorts out a laugh. “Would he?”

 

“I wouldn’t put it past him. Hey, did you decide on the attending position yet?”

 

“Not quite. We’re down to two.”

 

Abby nods. “I’ll be in three.”

 

Sophie is finishing the work-up when Abby walks in. “Eight year old with no history of chronic illness. SOB forty-eight hours. She’s had a cold for the past week. BP ninety-seven over fifty. Pulse one-ten. Pulse ox eighty-five. Temp one-oh-two. Her name is Kara.”

 

“Thanks, Sophie.” She smiles at the little girl. “Hi Kara, I’m Doctor Lockhart. Not feeling good huh?”

 

“It’s hard to breathe.” The girl sounds pitiful. 

 

“Okay. I’m going to listen to your lungs, okay?” Abby places her stethoscope. “Can you breathe for me?”

 

Abby listens closely and shakes her head. “Rales. When did her cold start?” She asks the patient’s mother. 

 

“Last week. It seemed like it was getting better and then this started.”

 

Abby nods. “Okay. Sophie, get a CBC and a chest X-ray.” She turns to mom. “We’re going to check for pneumonia. She has some fluid in her lungs, and her blood oxygen is low. Combined with the fever, cough and shortness of breath, that’s what it looks like.”

 

“I was afraid of that.” The mother sighs. “So what’s the treatment?”

 

“Rest and antibiotics. Nothing too scary.” She smiles at Kara. “We’ll see what the labs say and go from there.”

 

The labs confirm pneumonia. Abby gives her patient and her mother discharge instructions and a prescription, and finishes the chart. She heads to the lounge to get her things. Michaels looks up from her own charts when Abby opens her locker.

 

“Heading out?”

 

“Yeah.”

 

“How’s the little girl?”

 

“Cold that went to pneumonia.”

 

Dawn smiles. “Typical.”

 

“Yup. Good thing I had chicken soup and two days off.” Abby rolls her eyes.

 

“It was good for you. Us too. You get bitchy when you’re sick.”

 

Abby snorts. “So I’m told. I’m also, apparently, a drama queen.”

 

Michaels laughs. “Go have fun with the trick or treat. I kind of can’t wait to hear what he came up with.”

 

“Me either.” Abby’s not sure if she’s worried or excited about it as she heads to her car. She calls Luka. “Hey. On my way.”

 

“Okay. We’re ready for you.”

 

“You’re already in your costumes?”

 

“Maybe.”

 

“Luka. It’s five o’clock.”

 

“So?”

 

Abby laughs. “Fine. See you in a little bit.”

 

“Okay. Joe’s excited.”

 

Abby grins. “Good. Then you’re  _ not _ dressing me up as something slutty?”

 

“Come on. Would I do that?” Luka teases her.

 

“You absolutely would.”

 

There’s a pause. “You’re right. But not in front of Joe.”

 

Abby laughs as he clicks off. 

 

She walks into the house to the sound of wild cackling coming from the kitchen. Abby walks in to find Joe, in white, bright green and purple. Buzz Lightyear. She smiles at that, and then glances at Luka. Her jaw drops. He’s wearing jeans, a bright yellow shirt, holster, cow-print vest and cowboy hat. 

 

He sees her and grins. “So?”

 

Abby is speechless and then just starts laughing. “You look ridiculous.”

 

“You’re going to look ridiculous too. Costume is on the bed.”

 

Abby starts to speak when Joe gives a shout. “Mama! I Buzz!”

 

“I see that.”

 

“You be Jessie.”

 

Abby had been afraid of that. “Okay.”

 

Luka just grins at her again. “He can’t keep a secret. Go change. We have pizza.”

 

“It wasn’t exactly a secret once I saw the two of you.” She tosses it over her shoulder as she strides up the stairs and hears his laugh. Abby finds her costume where Luka told her it would be, and snickers. It was actually pretty cute. She wasn’t thrilled with the prospect of the cow-print pants, western style shirt and bright red hat; but Joe loved Toy Story, and it was a clever idea for a family costume. 

 

She dresses and heads down the stairs. Luka grins widely at her. “That’s….adorable.”

 

“Shut up. I don’t do adorable, and you know it.”

 

He laughs. “I know. It’s why I didn’t tell you. I didn’t want to hear you fuss and fret over it.”

 

Abby glares at him. “I do  _ not _ fuss and fret.”

 

“No, you bitch and complain. I was being nice.”

 

Abby just rolls her eyes at him. “Couldn’t you have made us a  _ little _ bit scary? Like, zombie Toy Story or something?”

 

Luka just laughs. “No. Eat your pizza.”

 

They stay out for nearly an hour and a half. Even with Joe tiring out and needing to be carried more than half the time. He was too excited otherwise to want to give up. And Abby had to admit it was fun. They got a lot of compliments and extra candy for their costumes.

 

“We should have brought the stroller.” Luka mutters as they let themselves in the house. 

 

“You know how that goes. When we bring it, we don’t need it, when we need it we don’t bring it. It’s like Murphy's Law.”

 

Luka laughs. “True. Joe, should we decide which candy we get to eat tonight?”

 

“No more than two….” Abby cuts herself off and shakes her head at his baleful stare. “Sorry.”

 

“It’s okay.” Luka dumps Joe’s candy haul on the coffee table. “Wow. That’s a lot of candy.”

 

“Mrs. Gunderson up the street gave you extra. She’s got a crush on you.”

 

Luka grins. Mrs. Gunderson was a ninety year old widow. “I’ve got one back, to be honest.”

 

Abby laughs. “I can’t blame you. She’s pretty great.” She sits beside him and takes a Milky Way and a package of Starburst for herself. “Once  you two figure out what candy you want, I’m putting it away. So choose wisely.”

 

Joe ends up with a Kit-Kat and a package of Gummi Bears. Luka, a Snickers and a Twix. Abby scoops the remaining candy into the bag. “You both can have more tomorrow. Do you want to handle bedtime? I’ll hang down here in case we get any stragglers, and meet you upstairs in a bit.”

 

Luka nods and picks up Joe who is fighting hard to stay awake. He kisses Abby’s head. “Thanks for playing along.”

 

She smiles at him and heads to the porch to get the bowl of candy they’d left for people to take since they weren’t there. Nearly empty. Abby gives it a half hour and then shuts the porch light off. She doubted they’d get anymore kids, as it was after nine. 

 

Upstairs, Abby checks on Joe and finds him snuggled against Luka with his thumb in his mouth, while they finish his bedtime story. It’s in Croatian, so she doesn’t understand most of it, but finds it beautiful nonetheless. She smiles and backs out of the room.

 

In the bedroom, she peels herself out of the ridiculous costume. Abby starts to reach for the dresser for PJ’s, and reconsiders. She looks at the hat she’d worn all night and decides that maybe she could do something fun with it. 

 

Luka comes in to find his wife on the bed, naked, but for the red cowboy hat. He licks his lips. “Ah, nice hat.”

 

“Thanks.” She gives him a look from under the brim that makes his blood heat. “Why don’t you come over here, Cowboy?”

 

“Okay, that’s completely corny.” He grins and walks slowly toward the bed where Abby grabs his belt and gives him a tug so he lands on top of her.

 

“I know.”  She kisses him. “You also know that Jessie is Buzz’s girl, right?”

 

“Nah. That’s not confirmed. Why would a Cowgirl want to be with a Space Man?”

 

“I have no idea. But we need to get you out of that ridiculous shirt.” 

 

Luka grins as she goes to work on his buttons. He dips his head and kisses her neck while she slides the shirt from his shoulders and trails her hands down his arms. “What did you do with  _ your _ hat?” Abby asks.

 

“What?” Luka continues trailing kisses along her throat. “Oh. I think it’s in the bathroom.”

 

“Hmm.” Abby tilts her head to the side to give him more access while her fingers work his belt free. He lifts his hips a bit so she can slide the jeans down his hips. “Too bad. I liked it.”

 

“Liked what?” He slides down her body a bit to kiss her breasts and chuckles against her skin. “Let’s forget about the hats, huh?” He reaches up with one hand to take hers off and toss it...somewhere. “Now you’re completely naked.”

 

Abby snickers. “Yeah. You should get yourself that way.”

 

Luka lifts his head from her belly and looks at her with a laugh in his eyes. “Okay.” He manages to strip the jeans away as he slides up to kiss her. She’s grinning when his mouth comes down on hers. He laughs as she playfully tickles his ribs and grabs her hands, linking his fingers with hers as he slips inside her. 

 

Abby opens her eyes to find him watching her as he moves. Slow thrusts meant to savor these moments of fun and ridiculousness between them. They were getting those back, and she wouldn’t take it for granted. She smiles at him as he brings his lips back to hers again and sighs at the slow dance of tongues and teeth. 

 

Luka’s heart is pounding as he quickens the pace. He feels Abby’s hands tighten on his, and her delighted cry of release as he feels her coil and shudder as she comes. He grins against her lips as he empties himself into her. 

 

Abby curls herself against his side. “I feel like I should make a woody joke here, but it feels inappropriate.”

 

Luka chuckles. “But apt.”

 

She trails her fingers over his bare chest. “Thanks for tonight. It was really fun.”

 

Luka’s eyes are already closed. “It was. Joe had a great time and that’s what matters.”

 

Abby smiles. “Yeah. But thanks.” She snuggles closer to him, kisses his jaw, and closes her eyes to sleep. 


	17. Chapter 17

“I want to discuss several things with you both that came out of your individual sessions. Is that going to be alright?”

 

Abby and Luka glance at each other and shrug. “Sure.” Abby speaks for them both. 

 

Anders nods. “This is how I work things. I just want you aware of that. And I need to be sure that we’re on the same page. Now, Abby, you and I discussed your previous relationship with doctor Carter in our session. Luka, you mentioned yours with Sam. I want to talk about the parallels of those relationships and what it means in the context of your own.”

 

Luka and Abby are both surprised that she’s going there so suddenly. Luka shifts, then speaks. “I don’t have feelings for Sam anymore. And Carter was a complicated situation…”

 

Anders smiles. “I understand that. I don’t mean to say that either of you have unresolved issues there. The opposite, in fact. I wonder if it ever occurred to either one of you that the reason you couldn’t make those relationships work was each other.”

 

They both sit quietly, staring at Anders. Abby speaks first. “It didn’t back then. But after Carter and I broke up...that was the same time I realized I still loved Luka.”

 

Luka smiles at her softly. “Her relationship with Carter was one of the reasons I sort of fell apart for awhile. I felt like I had ruined things with her..” He glances over when Abby shakes her head and starts to speak. “Quiet. It’s how I felt. They didn’t get together for awhile after we broke up. Carter was dating someone else...a good friend of ours now actually...and Abby and I got close again. As friends. Then...all of a sudden, Carter and Susan broke up and he went for it with Abby. It threw me. I was starting to think maybe her and I could try again.”

 

“Luka.” Abby gives him a sad smile.

 

“Well, anyways. I lived fast and stupid for awhile. I was reckless and a complete idiot. After Erin..”

 

“Erin?” Anders interrupts. 

 

“Erin was the medical student I nearly killed because I was being an asshole. She was in the car with me while I was driving too fast. Pissed off at everything.” Luka huffs out a bitter laugh. “We crashed and it lacerated her liver.”

 

“Why was she with you?”

 

“She needed a ride..” Luka begins.

 

“Luka, she was trying to get in your pants.” Abby rolls her eyes. “I’m sorry for what happened to her, but that’s the long-and-short of it. You saved her life.”

 

“After I nearly ended it.” Luka shrugs. “Anyway, after that happened, which was the same day I nearly killed a  _ patient  _ because of the bullshit I was doing, I decided I needed a change and I went to Africa.”

 

Anders nods. “Which we’ll talk about in a minute. Abby, you said you and Carter were having problems about that time.”

 

“Yeah. It’s...well, I knew that John always had this weird fantasy of me. Of who he thought I was or who I could be. With him. He spent our entire relationship trying to fix me.”

 

Anders smiles when Luka snorts and scowls. “That must have been difficult.”

 

“I guess. I thought at the time that he was just trying to help, but couldn’t figure out how. I only realized later what he was doing. I don’t even think he did it on purpose, or even knew he was doing it. Carter is a good man. We just weren’t right for each other. We couldn’t make each other happy.”

 

Luka picks up her hand and squeezes it. “Told you.”

 

Abby gives a little laugh. “When you were drunk and sad. It doesn’t count.”

 

“Still.” Luka snickers.

 

“So there was this whole thing where he was going to propose, but he didn’t.”

 

“Why?” Anders asks. 

 

“He said it didn’t feel right. He’d already told me he wanted to marry me, but hadn’t done the actual proposal thing.” Abby looks pointedly at Luka, and he chuckles. “I get that a lot, apparently.”

 

“I actually did it right when it finally happened, though.” Luka smiles at her. 

 

Abby grins at him. “Yeah, you did. After that, we never really got back on track. I think we both knew it was over, but neither of us had the guts to actually end it.” She blows out a breath. “So then his grandmother died, and this huge blow up happened, and he went to Africa.” 

 

“Luka, what happened in Africa? Are you comfortable talking about that?” Anders nods to him.

 

“Yeah. Abby knows a lot of it. But you mean about Carter, right?” Luka shrugs when she gives a small nod. “To tell you the truth, I was surprised that he wanted to come. I thought things were fine with him and Abby.” He shrugs again. “When he got there, I still saw him as a rival. We had started to get along better, but he would always be the guy who had Abby while I didn’t.” He clears his throat. “The first time he got to our camp, he came with Gillian.”

 

“The French Nurse.” Anders grins. It’s clear she’s enjoying  _ that _ story, the bits and pieces she’d gotten. 

 

Luka snickers and Abby smiles. “Yeah. Ah, Gillian and I...well, it was interesting. We had a good time together, and she was great. I was still hung up on Abby, and she had a boyfriend back home. It was just something to pass the time. But we started really talking and I think we both had some feelings. She helped me kind of move on, I guess.”

 

“From Abby?”

 

“Yeah. I started to realize that Abby loved Carter and I needed to get past it. So I started to. Then John showed up with her.” Luka sighs. “She was being herself, which is pretty brazen and ah, I guess flirtatious. She came on to the room.” Luka snorts at that. “I knew she meant me, but Carter was sitting right there and he wasn’t stealing this girl too.”

 

Abby snickers at that. “He didn’t  _ steal me  _ Luka.”

 

He smiles at her. “I know. But it pissed me off a little, that thought that he might cheat on you. Anyways, I basically played stud dog and asked Carter how Abby was doing.”

 

Anders snorts. “Sorry. Well done.”

 

Luka grins at her. “Yeah. He promised to leave Gillian be and that was that. After, we started talking about stuff. How things were there and we got to know each other better. He saved my life when he came back and wouldn’t give up on finding my body. I’d probably have died of Malaria within two days if they hadn’t come for me. I owe John everything I have now.” Luka says quietly.

 

“Have either of you discussed any of this with him?”

 

Abby shakes her head. “We don’t see him often. He’s back and forth between Africa and France. He only makes it home occasionally.”

 

Anders nods. “It might be a good idea, at some point.”

 

Luka nods. “You’re right. When I came home, Gillian came with me. Abby was right there to check in, even though I delivered the letter to her.”

 

“Letter?” 

 

“Carter dumped me to stay in Africa and find himself.” Abby shrugs. “I was pissed at first, but I got over it too fast for it to really hurt. And like I said, I had realized I still loved this guy.” She jerks her thumb at Luka. 

 

“So that was that?”

 

“Pretty much, yeah. Carter met someone over there who is perfect for him. She got pregnant pretty fast and then they lost the baby. Both Luka and I helped him through that. I guess you could say the three of us resolved any lingering issues around that time.”

 

“That’s also when I had just started dating Sam.” Luka says quietly and gives Abby a look. 

 

“Yeah, I guess it was. I really thought you were crazy about her.” Luka shakes his head and kisses Abby’s knuckles. 

 

“Alright. Tell me about that.” Anders nods.

 

Luka bites his lip. How did he explain the complicated situation he’d had with her? “Her son kind of latched onto me.” Luka grins, thinking of how persistent Alex had been in the beginning. “Sam didn’t like it, so she told me off a lot. I thought it was cute to be honest.”

 

Abby snorts. “Luka, she was a total bitch when she wasn’t sending you mixed signals.”

 

“Yeah, but she could be a cute total bitch. Like someone else I know.” Luka grins at her.

 

Abby pinches his belly playfully. “Jerk.”

 

Anders smiles. “Not a fan?”

 

Abby shrugs. “She was a good nurse, but she could be cocky, rude and arrogant. She ignored doctor’s orders more often than she followed them. But she could be amusing, and she made Luka happy for awhile.”

 

Luka lets out a half laugh. “That about sums her up. Things got serious more quickly than I intended. She had an ex…” he glances at Abby who picks up his hand again, squeezes it, and shakes her head at him. Anders notes the exchange. 

 

“Anyways, it was complicated. That whole ‘I wanted a family’ again thing? That’s what I thought I was getting with Sam. And I wanted to protect her.” Luka sighs and shakes his head. “Her and Alex moved in. And I tried, I really did. I thought I loved her, but I think I loved the idea of her and I and Alex as a family.”

 

“Why did it end?”

 

“Alex took off to find his father, who was in prison in Colorado. Alex didn’t know that, just that his dad was out there. Sam and I had already been having a lot of problems. She had a pregnancy scare, and she was completely relieved when it turned out to not be. That bothered me more than I wanted to tell her. She dragged me to therapy.” Luka grins at Anders. “It didn’t help.”

 

She smiles at him. “Understandable. Therapy only really works when you want to fix something.”

 

He nods. “So Alex took off. We chased him across the country, and Sam and I really talked for the first time. We didn’t want the same things, plain and simple.” Luka smiles. “Abby and I ended up back together about a few months later.”

 

Anders nods and sits back in her chair, crossing her legs again. “So, what I’m hearing is, you were with her for the chance at a family again. But with Abby, you’ve told me, and her, that you never needed children with her.”

 

“Because that’s true. I’ve always loved Abby for who  _ she  _ is. Not who I think she is or who I want her to be.”

 

Abby smiles at him. “Same goes.”

 

“Abby, did you need kids with Luka?”

 

Abby is momentarily stunned. “What? No. I never really wanted kids at all. I had so much baggage, plus the genetic side...yeah. I worked hard to keep that from even becoming a possibility.”

 

“But you decided to have Joe.” Anders says quietly.

 

“Because I realized that at the end of the day, I wanted to be with Luka, and I wanted to have our baby. I don’t know that I would have made the same choice with anyone else.”  She shrugs. “It didn’t have anything to do with wanting to do it so he could be a father again, if that’s what you’re thinking. I did it for us. I did it because I love him and he loves me, and we deserved it.”

 

Anders smiles. “I think that’s wonderful. And I wasn’t thinking that. I was just curious where your decision came from.” She clears her throat. “I notice that you both tensed up when you mentioned Sam’s ex. Care to tell me why?”

 

Luka gives her a grim look. “Sam’s ex-husband is the reason Joe and Abby both nearly died.”

 

Anders nods. “What happened?”

 

“Steve and his cellmate tried to execute a jailbreak.They found a way to be brought to the hospital. Their plan was to grab Sam and use her to walk them out.” He shrugs. “I got in their way.”

 

“They nearly killed you too, Luka. Sam saved your life. Which is one of the reasons that I don’t completely hate her.” Abby shakes her head.

 

“Yeah. She intubated me after one of their accomplices stabbed me with a paralytic. Anyways. Abby realized something was wrong, and told the guards. They started firing. She fell and it caused an abruption. She had to have an emergency C-section and Joe was born premature.” He clears his throat and looks haunted. “There were a few moments when I thought I was going to lose them both. I didn’t know if I could go through that again. And then I thought I’d have to choose who needed me more.” He smiles ruefully. “Abby made that choice for me by yelling at me to go with the baby.”

 

“Sorry.” Abby picks up his hand. She knows enough about how Danijela and the kids died to realize how difficult that must have been for him. “I’m sorry, Luka. I never even thought of that.”

 

He shakes his head. “Why should you? Especially in that moment. You just wanted Joe safe.” He kisses her hand. “Ah. Danijela probably would have been saved if I had taken her straight to the hospital. But Jasna…” Tears are prickling at Luka’s eyes. “My daughter...I think I knew she was gone right away. But I kept doing CPR, calling for help, long after I knew with certainty she was gone.” The tears fall fully now. “By the time I stopped from exhaustion, my wife had died too.” 

 

Anders hands him the tissues quietly, and watches Luka gather himself. “And for you, Abby still being in danger, in surgery while your son was being taken away, brought it all back.”

 

Luka nods. “I held it together for about an hour. Then I went and cried and raged in the bathroom.” He smiles a little. “I broke the mirror in there.”

 

“That seems like a perfectly reasonable response.” She smiles at him. “And you know that both circumstances were beyond your control, right?”

 

He gives a little grimace. “In my head, yeah. The rest of me still needs to catch up. I feel like it was my fault both times.” Luka shakes his head when Anders starts to speak. “I know, logically, that’s not true. But I still feel that way.”

 

“Okay. Something to work on.” She glances at her timer. “We only have a few more minutes. Luka, I think talking more about this will help you. You two can do it on your own, or we can continue in our next session. But you need to really put some work into letting some of your guilt go.”

 

She smiles when Luka nods. “Good. I’ll see you both soon.”

  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  



	18. Chapter 18

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Heads up, this is a pretty angsty chapter with a lot of bad language. I was purging some feelings. :)

Luka lets Abby take the wheel. He puts his head back and closes his eyes while she starts the car and drives away in silence. He feels gutted. He  _ hates  _ talking about that time. Not only because of his guilt, but because he always felt like speaking of it gave away some of the pieces of them that he kept locked in his heart. It was irrational and stupid, but it was there. He was closer to Abby than anyone else in the world, and even she only knew bits and pieces. And that wasn’t fair. 

 

Abby glances over when he sighs. His eyes stay closed when they stop at a red light. She reaches over and takes his hand. “You okay?” He only nods, keeping his eyes closed. Abby hates seeing him like this. He seemed defeated, and that was  _ not  _ Luka. For all of his brooding nature, he was an inherently optimistic and positive person. It was one of the paradoxes of him that continually fascinated her. And they balanced each other, as she was generally pessimistic and sarcastic. She glances at her phone when it buzzes, and turns left instead of right. 

 

“Who was that?” Luka asks.

 

“The babysitter.”

 

Luka cracks one eye open and looks at her with it. “Where are you going? Home is the other way.”

 

“I know. Quiet. Katie is staying for awhile, so we’ve got some time.” Luka shrugs and nods, closing his eyes again. She’s seen him like this a few times before. After their breakup. When she got together with Carter. Before he left for Africa. After his split from Sam. When she’d told him about what happened while he was in Croatia. It scares her when he’s like this. The session was harder on him than she’d expected. 

 

Abby pulls into the parking lot of a little Greek dive and cuts the engine. The place is packed. “I thought we’d get dinner. Ah..a patient told me about this place. We don’t have to…”

 

Luka opens his eyes and smiles at her. “No, it’s okay.” He blinks and sees the place. “Greek, huh? Sounds good.” He starts to open the door when she puts a hand on his arm. He looks over at her and sees the concern in her eyes. “Abby.” He gives a little sigh.

 

She pulls him over to her and cups his face in her hands and finds it amazingly easy to say what she needs to.  “I love you, Luka. I’m worried.” 

 

He nods and leans his forehead on hers. “I know. Just...give me a bit. Okay?”

 

“Okay.” Abby pulls his chin down and brings her lips to his in a gesture of pure and simple comfort. She deepens the kiss when he groans and sighs, letting her tongue dance over his and nipping at his bottom lip. They stay locked there for a few moments, lost in the bliss of kissing each other. She softens her lips and gives him one final peck. “Let’s go eat.”

 

Luka climbs out of the car and comes around to take her hand. “I don’t want you to worry about me.” 

 

“Too bad. That’s part of the deal right? You worry about me, I worry about you.” She smiles at the hostess when they step into the restaurant. “Two.”

 

The hostess nods and gathers menus. “This way.” She’s about 19 and gives Luka a rather blatant once over that Abby is sure she thinks is subtle. She grins and rolls her eyes. 

 

“She completely eye-fucked you.” Abby teases him after she gives them their menus and the server’s name and walks away with another glance over her shoulder. 

 

Luka gives a tired smile. “I know. Even  _ I  _ noticed that one. Not exactly subtle was she?”

 

Abby snickers. “I bet she thought she was.” They open the menus and peruse when the waiter comes up. He’s a good looking Greek man who manages to flirt with Abby while he takes their drink orders.

 

Luka feels some of the tension ease out of him and grins at her. “Look who’s talking.”

 

She waves that away. “He’s just doing his job.”

 

Luka takes her hand and kisses it. “No, you’re hot.” He laughs when she rolls her eyes. “So both of us could score here if we were single.”

 

“Good to know. But I’d rather score with you.” Abby smiles at him.

 

He gives her his sweet smile that always melts her heart. “Same goes.” 

 

Abby decides on Moussaka while Luka goes for the Gyro. The waiter continues to be charming and quite adorable. She blushes.

 

Luka laughs at her again. “Thanks for this. The session was brutal.”

 

Abby nods. “I know. But it helped didn’t it?”

 

He’s quiet for a moment. “Yes. I was thinking...in the car. There are so many things I’ve never told you about them.”

 

“I wish you would. I know it’s hard for you...but I wish you would. Jasna and Marko are Joe’s brother and sister. And I want to know more about Danijela too. They’re still your family Luka. Just like we are.” She squeezes his hand, afraid she’s said too much. “But I understand if you can’t do it.”

 

He sits quietly while the food is served and takes a sip of his Coke when the waiter leaves. “Danijela was...well, she was nothing like you.” He grins when she smiles at him. “She was sweet and even-tempered. But she was no push-over and she let me know it. She was passionate about the people and the things she loved. I was crazy about her Abby. Crazy in that way that you only really ever feel at sixteen. Like you  _ have _ to be together or the world will end.” He pauses for a bite of his Gyro when Abby nods in understanding. It’s delicious. “We couldn’t keep our hands off each other. That’s ah..part of the reason we got married the minute she turned eighteen.” He laughs a little. “I’ll spare you the details of that. But I loved her, with everything in me. I never really believed I would feel that again, until I met you.” He looks up to find her smiling at him with tears in her eyes. Luka hands her a napkin. “She was funny and ridiculous, and when the kids came, we had this...amazing family. And then it was all taken away.” He murmurs. 

 

They continue to eat in silence. “I’m glad you told me all of that. I feel like I know her better now.”

 

Luka nods. “Abby, it’s not that I want to keep it from you. I’m not hiding anything. It’s just...well, I feel like when I talk about them I’m giving up some part of them that I keep locked inside me. It was fine not to talk about it before, with other people. But you’re my wife, and I love you and Joe just as much as I love them. It’s selfish of me not to share them with you.”

 

Abby smiles at him. “It’s not selfish. It’s human.” She reaches over to take his hand again. “But you don’t have to talk about it anymore tonight. You’re pretty new to this whole share-your-feelings thing.”

 

He snorts out a laugh. “Yeah. Want dessert?”

 

Abby shakes her head. “No. Wait...think we can get Baklava to go?”

 

“I don’t see why not.” Luka orders the dessert to take home and asks for the check. The waiter nods and walks briskly away. “I think he noticed we were having a serious conversation. He stopped the flirting.”

 

“Maybe because I wasn’t flirting back?” Abby shakes her head.

 

“Like that would stop anyone.” He rolls his eyes.

 

Abby laughs. “Okay, maybe. But we should leave him a good tip. Which is what he was angling for to begin with.”

 

They leave the restaurant in a lighter frame of mind than they walked in. “I’ll drive this time.”

 

Abby dangles the keys. “Why?”

 

“I’m the man. I’m supposed to do it.” He laughs when her brows go up. “Kidding. I just want to drive.”

 

“Okay.” She settles in the passenger seat. “Luka?”

 

“Hmm?” He starts the car and pulls out of the parking lot. They drive in silence for a few minutes. 

 

“Did Gillian  _ really _ come on to Carter?”

 

He snorts. “If it had a dick, Gillian came on to it. It was part of her charm.”

 

“Do you think…”

 

“No. Carter didn’t cheat on you. Not while I was there. I would have heard. Secrets are hard to keep over there. You’re living in such close quarters.”

 

Abby nods and stays silent. 

 

“I don’t think he would have anyway. Whatever I thought of him at that time, I know he cared about you. Carter was and is a lot of things. But he isn’t a cheat.”

 

Abby tenses at his words. Luka glances over to see her face and curses. “You’re not a cheat either Abby. Christ. I thought we’d settled this.”

 

Abby just closes her eyes and shakes her head.

 

Luka pulls into the driveway and slams the car into park. “Let’s go inside. I have a feeling we’re going to fight, and I don’t want to do it in the driveway for all of the neighbors to see.”

 

He pushes out of the car and strides towards the house. His long legs eating up so much ground that she wouldn’t have kept up with him anyways. She gathers the Baklava and follows. By the time she gets inside, Katie is putting her coat on and Luka has his wallet out. “Thanks Doctor Kovac.”

 

“Sure. Do you need a lift?”

 

“No. Thanks. Hayden is picking me up.” Headlights slash through the arbor window when her boyfriend pulls in the drive. She turns to Abby. “Joe’s been down for about an hour. We watched both Toy Story’s, and he told me all about being Buzz for Halloween.”

 

Abby forces a smile. “That’s great. Thanks for staying later.”

 

“No prob. I can do my homework just as easily here as I can at home.” She rolls her eyes. “See you.” 

 

Abby waits while she leaves and Luka closes the door behind her. She opens her mouth to speak when Luka holds up a hand and shakes his head.

 

“Just shut up. I’ve got some fucking things to say and I’m going to say them.” He keeps his voice low while he stares holes in her. “You told me, months ago, that making amends and forgiveness is part of the AA program, right?”

 

Abby nods, speechless. She notes that his accent has gone thicker, which happens when he’s angry, emotional, tired, or well, horny. She votes for angry  _ and _ emotional this time. 

 

“And I told  _ you _ , again, months ago, that I forgave you. That you  _ had  _ made amends. And you go even further by living those amends every day by making the life we have together wonderful. 

 

“Yeah, but….”

 

“But  _ nothing.  _ I want you to stop this. I want you to stop thinking that you’re some horrible person because you did a really fucking stupid thing when you were drunk and blacked out. Jesus Christ. Do you even  _ remember  _ it?”

 

She has a flash of waking up, disoriented, still drunk, and naked. Shame washes over her. “Parts.”

 

Luka shakes his head. “I understand that you’re ashamed of it. But I’m asking you flat out, here and now. Did you make a conscious  _ choice  _ to cheat on me?”

 

Abby is startled at the question. “No. Of course I didn’t. I don’t even remember going there.”

 

Luka feels his rage at Moretti spike. The man deserved more than the one ass-kicking Luka had given him. “So you didn’t do anything but make the choice to drink. That was a terrible decision, but you’re an alcoholic. It happens.” He takes her by the shoulders and shakes her a little. “Moretti is a vile asshole who took advantage of a drunk woman who he was well aware was married to the man who used to have his job. Why the fuck do you think that was?”

 

“What?” Abby shakes her head in confusion. “I don’t understand what you mean.”

 

“I had a lot of time to think while we were separated. I blamed it all on you at first. It took me awhile, but I came around to the fact that it was both of our faults. But this particular situation? That’s all on him.”

 

“Luka…”

 

“Abby. I told you to shut up.”

 

His voice is still low, and she’s surprised he’s not shouting. They could really get going in a fight. But this icy rage is something she’d only seen a few times before. She wasn’t afraid. She could never be afraid of him physically. But she was a little shocked. 

 

“You told me, and a few other people told me, what happened that night. You were belligerent with Pratt, and he tried to get you to go home. That you went back in anyways. Abby, that is  _ not  _ you. I wasn’t even there and I know that.”

 

She looks at him quietly. “It is me, Luka. If I let it be.”

 

“Fuck this.” He takes her hand and drags her over to the couch and pushes her down. “Keep listening. That is  _ not  _ you. I understand what you mean. That the drunk person is always there, and you have to work hard to keep her locked away. I  _ get  _ that. I didn’t always, but I do now. But what I  _ don’t get _ , is you continuing to beat yourself up for it when you’ve already done everything possible to make up for it.” Luka pauses and takes a breath. His voice whips out again. “When you went back inside, Moretti zeroed in on you, right?”

 

Abby shakes her head. “I really don’t know.”

 

“Apparently that’s what happened. He offered you a ride. You told me that part. And then, well.” Luka stops for a minute. “But my  _ point _ is, you didn’t consent to any of it. You couldn’t. And he did all of this partially as a power play. He had my job, he decided he wanted my wife too.”

 

Abby is stunned. “I’ve never looked at it like that.”

 

“Well start looking. Because we’re done with this fucking topic after tonight. I don’t even want to talk about it with Monica.” He gives her a glare when she opens her mouth. “You can do it in your individual sessions if you want. But I’ll be  _ damned  _ if I have to keep rehashing this. I love you, and I fucking forgive you, okay? I don’t know what else I can do to prove that to you!” His voice finally spikes up a bit. 

 

Abby sits quietly, hands in her lap. “Are you finished?”

 

Luka drops down on the couch with her. “Maybe. That depends on what you say.”

 

“Fine.” She looks over at him. “Luka, I have to take some responsibility for it. I get what you’re saying, really. But I still did this, drunk or not, it’s part of my recovery to take responsibility for things I did while I was drinking.”

 

He nods. “Okay.”

 

“But I  _ can _ stop making you feel like I don’t believe you. That I don’t believe in your forgiveness. Because I do. With everything in me.” She reaches for his hand, relieved when he takes hers. “Jesus, I love you so much it hurts me sometimes. My doing this nearly destroyed our family.” She shakes her head when he starts to speak. “It’s your turn to shut up. My turn to speak.” She nods when his lips quirk a little. “Good. I don’t just mean what happened with Moretti. I mean all of it. I did a lot of things I’m ashamed of in that month. I hurt more people than you. I’ve made my amends, and I know you forgive me, but I’m still working on letting go of the shame. Can you understand that?”

 

Luka nods. His anger is mostly gone now. “Okay. I understand that. But Abby, I’m serious about this. I can’t keep doing this. You know that I’ve never lied to you. I’m not just saying I forgive you to brush past this. I really do forgive you, and when you doubt that, it brings it all back up. I can’t keep doing it.” He reiterates.

 

Abby realizes that by punishing herself, she’s punishing him. And that was completely and utterly wrong. She leans over to kiss him. “Okay. Really. I’ll do everything I can to just let all of it go.”

 

Luka runs a hand over her hair. “I need to tell you one more thing, before we let this go and the name Kevin Moretti is never uttered by either of us ever again.”

 

“What?”

 

“I punched him.” Luka grins at her shocked expression.

 

“What?  _ When _ ?”

 

“He stopped by the hospice the day we got back together. I think he wanted to explain things, or something.” Luka shrugs. “As if anything he said would have made a difference. I’d already decided to forgive you.”

 

Abby scowls. “He didn’t have any right to do that.”

 

“Yeah, well, whatever. I let him say his piece, and then I punched him. He dropped like a sack of rocks.” Luka grins again.

 

“You…” Abby starts to laugh. “Really?”

 

“I told you I only punch people over you.” He leans in to give her a hard kiss. “Are we done with this now? For good?”

 

“Yeah.” 

 

“Good. Let’s go to bed.” Luka takes her hand and hauls her up. He slides his arm around her waist. “You know the best part about fighting with you?”

 

“Hmmm. Let me guess. Making up?”

 

He scoops her up into his arms and heads to the stairs. “Exactly.”

 


	19. Chapter 19

November slogs by in the usual fashion. Terrible weather, busy days at work with cold and flu season starting, and Thanksgiving being low key, just the three of them. 

 

“I can’t believe you want to do this.” Abby rolls her eyes toward her husband. 

 

“What? It will be fun.” Luka grins. “Joe will enjoy it.”

 

Abby sighs. “Probably.” It’s the second week of December, and her casual suggestion that they go pick out a Christmas tree has been taken one step too far, in her opinion.

 

Luka checks the GPS when it pings, and takes the highway exit it indicates. “You’ve never cut down your own tree before?”

 

“No. They sell them. All cut down and tied together already.”

 

Luka chuckles. “Spoilsport.” He grins at her again. “Come on. Let me feel manly.”

 

Abby snorts. “Yeah. Like you need help with that. And don’t think this gets you out of doing the lights. That  _ is  _ the man’s job, and I’m not touching it.”

 

“I wouldn’t dream of trying to get out of that.” He smiles a little. Every Christmas they’d had together, she had made him string the lights. Not that he minded. Luka pulls into the lot of a tree farm. “Ready?”

 

Abby rolls her eyes again and complains for form when she climbs out of the car. “It’s cold.” 

 

“You’re bundled up, and so is Joe. Stop bitching.” 

 

Abby smirks. “I can’t. It’s my personality.”

 

“Don’t I know it.” Luka steps to the booth to get the saw from the farmer before she can retort. When he turns back around, she’s grinning at him. 

 

“Okay, farmer John. Let’s get this over with. And try not to screw it up.” She takes his free hand while she carries Joe in one arm.

 

“Who’s farmer John?” He looks sincerely puzzled.

 

Abby giggles. “You, you idiot.” 

 

“Oh. Well, the guy said there are carts out here to help us haul the tree when we’re done. Do you see one you like?”

 

Abby looks around. They have a lot more room in the house than either of them did in their apartments. So maybe they should go for a taller tree this year? 

 

“Dat one.” Joe speaks up.

 

Luka and Abby study the tree Joe is pointing to. It’s huge, but not so big it wouldn’t fit. “That one? It’s awfully big, buddy.” Abby smiles at him.

 

Joe nods. “Dat tree. I like it.”

 

Luka shrugs and grins. Abby shakes her head. “Okay, you’re the one who’s going to be hauling it.”

 

She stands back with Joe at a safe distance while Luka cuts the tree down and she smirks while he grunts and muscles it into place on the cart. They haul the tree back to pay, and the actual farmer helps them bundle the tree and strap it to the roof of the car. 

 

Once they are back in the warmth of the SUV, Luka ponders. “Do we have enough lights for that thing?”

 

Abby sighs. “Probably not. Guess we need to hit Home Depot.”

 

With more lights and ornaments bought, they make it home and sit in the driveway wondering how in the hell to get the enormous tree through the door. “I guess we just go for it.” Luka shrugs.

 

“Okay.” Abby unstraps Joe from his seat and hauls him out. He had fallen asleep on the drive home. “I’m going to put him down for a bit. He won’t be cranky when we decorate. Can you handle this?” At Luka’s nod, she heads in the house, leaving the door open as wide as she can. When she comes back down, he’s struggling to get the tree in it’s holder. Abby feels a little flutter watching his muscles ripple when the back of his coat rides up. Huh. It  _ was  _ manly. She decides to take pity on him and strides forward. She gets down on the floor and slides under to tighten the bolts. Luka easily straightens the tree and she locks it in.

 

“Thanks.” He smiles at her when she slides back out. Luka shrugs out of his coat while she takes hers off. He holds out his hand. “Come here. I want to show you something.”

 

Abby purses her lips and looks him up and down. “I’ve seen it before. It’s nice. I might play with it later if you behave.”

 

Luka chuckles. “You’re so good to me. But that wasn’t what I was talking about. Come here.” He repeats. He draws her toward the bookshelf in the living room, and reaches up to the top shelf of books. Higher than she would have noticed. He hands her the wrapped package.

 

“What’s this?”

 

He flicks a finger on the top of her head. “Why do you always ask? Open it.”

 

Abby pulls the wrapping paper off the small box and feels a lump rise in her throat when she sees what’s inside. “Luka…”

 

He lifts the small compass out of the box and holds it up. “I had it engraved.” He says softly.

 

Abby feels tears spring to her eyes. It was a smaller replica of the one he’d given her three years prior. The night she’d told him she was pregnant. On the back was a small copy of their wedding photo, the one they’d taken with Joe. Engraved below were the words “We’ll always find each other…” She looks up at him, lost for words. “I…”

 

“It’s an ornament. We can hang it on the tree to remind us of all of the good things we have. You’ll have a year sober on Christmas Day. This will remind us of that too.”

 

That breaks her. With a sob, she steps forward into his arms and weeps. He wraps them tight around her and kisses her head. “Shhh. It’s okay baby.”

 

“It’s beautiful.” She tips her head up to look at him. “I can’t tell you…”

 

“You don’t have to.” He brings his lips to hers. “It means the same to me.” 

 

Abby shakes her head and cups his face. “Luka. God.” She draws his mouth down to hers and pours herself into the kiss. Hoping that it expresses all of the love and gratitude she feels in this moment. “Why are you so wonderful?” She murmurs against his lips. 

 

Luka walks her backwards toward the couch until her knees hit the edge and he tumbles down on top of her. “Why are you?” His fingers slide under the edge of her sweater and caresses the soft skin above her jeans. “I love you, Abigail.”

 

Abby gives a choked laugh and pinches his butt. “I love you, too. Even when you’re a smartass.”

 

Luka lifts his head and smiles down at her. “Especially then.” He continues to play his fingers over her. She sighs as he unbuttons her jeans with one hand while the other is stroking the side of her breast. 

 

“Probably true.” Her breath hitches when Luka lowers his head and kisses her belly. His thumb strokes along her scar from the C-section and she reaches down and strokes his head. “Luka…”

 

“Abby.” He licks his way lower and she lifts her hips to allow him to slide the jeans over them. “Shhh.” His breath is hot against her skin, and she jerks a little when he rides his tongue down the vee between her thigh and her center. Luka smiles as he hears her muffled groan while he uses his mouth to pleasure her. She bucks and rides out the storm as he uses lips and tongue and teeth to bring her release. 

 

Abby cries out as she shatters and goes limp. Luka slides up her body. She’s still wearing her sweater. He toys with the edge. “I think we’ll leave this on. Sexy.” He whispers. He lowers his mouth to take her nipple in his teeth through the fabric. 

 

Abby’s eyes fly open then as sensation floods her. “Jesus.” Luka’s hand with his long, strong fingers is between her legs pressing and playing until she can’t take anymore. “I can’t.” Abby chokes it out as she slides her fingers down to work his jeans open and down his hips. “Luka…”

 

He lifts his head and smiles down at her. His hazel eyes intense and focused. “You can…” He brings his mouth back to hers in a deep kiss, his tongue sweeping in and tangling with hers. He smiles against her mouth as she comes again. 

 

Abby drags his sweatshirt over his head, needing to feel his flesh under her hands. She grips his arms as she wraps her legs around his waist. “I want you inside me. Now…” 

 

Luka drives himself into her. He groans as he feels her muscles tighten around him. “Abby.” He drops his forehead to hers as he thrusts. Her small cries are like music as he draws out the pleasure for them both.

 

Abby is lost in the sensations he brings her. She had never had another lover like him. The power of their love for each other overwhelmed everything and everyone else. It amazed her every single time they came together how much more they could bring to each other.

 

Luka’s hips are moving faster, and he slides his hands under her hips to go deeper. Her legs tighten hard around his waist as she comes a third time. He lowers his mouth to hers again and lets himself go.

 

They lay wrapped in each other after. Luka presses his lips to the side of her neck. “All of that, over a compass.”

 

Abby smiles and trails her fingers down his arm. “Well, it was a pretty special compass.” She buries her head against his chest. “I can’t even begin to tell you how much it means. I love you so much.” 

 

“I know.” He smiles. “Now we can think of this every time we hang it too.” He snickers and tickles her ribs. “Maybe we can reenact it.”

 

“I wouldn’t be opposed to that…” she’s startled into sitting up when she hears the plaintive call. “Maaaamaaaa.”

 

“Shit!” She shoves Luka aside as he chuckles. “What are you laughing at? Do you want him to come down here and see us like this? Where are my pants?” She looks frantically around. 

 

Luka points to the other side of the coffee table and laughs even harder at her frazzled expression while she hurries around, bare-assed to retrieve them.

 

“It’s  _ not  _ funny, Luka.” She glares at him. “I’m coming, Joe!” She calls out and hitches into her jeans. Abby shoots another look at Luka while he continues to lie there, half naked. “Get dressed, dammit.” And hurries out.

 

Luka shakes his head as he hitches his jeans back up over his hips. It’s not like Joe was catching them in the act. He was two for Christ’s sake. He wouldn’t even know what was happening. But Luka drags his sweatshirt back over his head just as Abby comes down the stairs with a happy babbling Joe in her arms. 

 

She smiles and drops Joe in Luka’s lap. “He had the red frog dream again. He can tell you all about it while you two do the lights. I’ve got to put some dinner together.” 

 

Luka looks down at a grinning Joe when Abby sails out. “Well, buddy. It looks like mommy’s irritated with Tata.”

 

“Jerk.” Joe says happily and laughs like a maniac. 

 

Luka laughs. “Yeah, Tata’s a jerk.” He rises to go get the lights out of the boxes and start paying his penance. “So what did the red frog do now?”

 

*********************************************************

 

Luka sits quietly watching as Abby and Joe hang ornaments on the tree. They have their Christmas playlist on the iPod and hot chocolate in thick mugs.

 

He can’t help remembering what it had been like back home in Croatia. Danijela would cook a feast and there would be cookies and milk and travarica. They would work on the tree together and then crash on the couch with a silly movie. 

 

What he had here with Abby and Joe was just as beautiful and special, and he knew, better than anybody, that he needed to treasure it. He rises and walks to the tree to stand next to Abby. 

 

“Did you hang your new one?”

 

Abby smiles at him. “Not yet. I want to put it on together.” She grips his hand as if she knows exactly what he had been thinking about. “Do you want to help Joe put the star on top?”

 

Luka looks at the top of the tree. Even with his height, it was too tall. “Yeah, let me get the step-ladder.”

 

Abby nods. “Hey Joe, want to put the star on the top of the tree?”

 

Joe gets up quickly from his knees where he had been hanging the little plastic ornaments she’d given him in precise rows on the tree. “Star!”

 

When Luka brings the ladder in and sets it up, she lets him climb up and then hands Joe to him. She pulls the camera out of her pocket and snaps a couple of shots as Joe struggles to place it just right. She takes a couple more when he lets it go and claps his hands over a job well done. 

 

“Good job, buddy.” Luka kisses his nose and hands him back down to Abby, who has tears in her eyes. “What? What’s wrong?” He asks, alarmed. 

 

Abby grins and wipes her eyes with her hand. “Nothing. I’m just a sentimental idiot tonight, that’s all.”

 

Luka smiles at her and climbs down. He wraps his arm around her shoulder so the three of them are wrapped as a unit. “It’s Christmas. You’re supposed to be sentimental.” He leans over and kisses her head. “You should probably send some of those pictures to your mom.”

 

Abby sighs. “I know it. She’s been bugging me to visit.”

 

Luka just nods. Abby knows where he stands on Maggie. It’s always up to her how much contact she has with her mother. He stays out of it. He’d learned that a long time ago. 

 

“I can’t hold her off much longer.” She sighs again. “I shouldn’t hold her off. She’s amazing with Joe.” Abby sets Joe back down so that he toddles off back to his ornaments. 

 

Luka smiles. “She really is.”

 

“I just wanted to give us some time to settle in before we were visited by hurricane Maggie.”

 

Luka laughs. “Hurricane?”

 

“Well, I suppose it’s more downgraded to tropical storm these days. She wants to bring Eric too.”

 

“Is he staying on his meds?”

 

“She says so.” She shrugs when Luka lifts a brow. “Come on, Luka. You know how it is.”

 

“You said the few times you’ve talked to him he’s seemed okay.”

 

“He has. And the visit in Chicago before we came here went okay. But that was just for the day.” She looks up at him. “This would be considerably longer.”

 

Luka frowns. “How much longer?”

 

“I don’t know. At least a couple of days.”

 

He grins. “That’s  _ considerably _ ?”

 

Abby chuckles. “Luka, you barely know him. And Maggie is a lot to handle on her own…”

 

Luka stops her by turning her toward him and kissing her forehead. “Abby. They’re your family and they’re welcome here as long as you want them.”

 

She closes her eyes. “I know. I just wish I knew what to expect.”

 

“Hey.” He tilts her chin up. “You have to stop worrying and micromanaging with them. It is what it is.”

 

“I know.” She smiles. “Maybe we could make you a little woodshop in the basement. You’d have somewhere to escape.”

 

He grins at her. “I actually wouldn’t mind that.” He kisses her again. “So when are Susan and Chuck going to be here?”

 

“They’re flying out the day after Christmas. They’ll be here through New Years Day.”

 

Luka nods. “We need to finish that guest room.”

 

Abby laughs and starts hanging ornaments again. “I know it. I figured Cosmo could sleep in with Joe if he wants to. Susan was going to get a hotel and I told her no way. They were staying at Casa Kovac.”

 

Luka shrugs and grins. “It will be good to have friends around for a few days. I’ve missed everyone.”

 

“Me too. We should probably make a call to County to say hi at some point.”

 

“We definitely should. Maybe while they’re here. Susan would probably like to check in too.”

 

Abby nods. “Greg’s been on my mind the last few days.”

 

Luka strokes his hand over her hair. “Me too. It’s always hard. The first holiday season.”

 

“It was just...not fair. It was so sudden. He was going to be offered the Chief position. Propose to Bettina. His life was finally falling into place like he’d always wanted it. And then bam. Gone in a fucking mob hit for Christ’s sake.” She throws up her hands.

 

Luka takes her hands and pulls her in. “It could have been you.”

 

He tightens his grip on her when she shakes her head. “It could have been. Abby, I never told you, but when I heard about the explosion on the news, my world stopped. When they said where it happened, I knew you’d walked back to the hospital that way. All I could think was something had happened to you and I had to find you.”

 

Abby draws back to look at him. She remembers him rushing into County, panic in every line of his body. She’d assumed it had been about Greg, and it had broken her heart to have to tell him that their friend was dead. “It never even crossed my mind that you coming there was about me.”

 

Luka gives a short laugh. “Which proves how badly I fucked things up.” He shakes his head when she starts to speak. “No. You should have had  _ every  _ reason to think it was about you. You didn’t, and that’s on me.” He kisses her on both cheeks, and then softly on her lips. “I’m sorry.”

 

“Luka. I just assumed somebody had told you Greg was hurt. Why would I think it was about me?”

 

He shrugs. “I don’t know. But it was. And as terrible as it was when you told me Greg was gone, my first thought was ‘thank God it wasn’t you’”. 

 

Abby wraps her arms around him and holds tight. “I understand that feeling.”

 

Luka rests his head on hers. “I guess you do.” 

 

Abby sighs. “Let’s hang our ornament and go to bed.”

 

Luka nods. “That’s the plan.”

  
  
  



	20. Chapter 20

Luka cracks one eye open when he feels Abby’s lips on the nape of his neck. “What’re you doing?” He draws the hand she’d thrown over his waist up to his mouth to kiss.

 

“What do you think I’m doing?” Abby murmurs as he turns over on his back toward her. She kisses his ear and starts to shift when his cell phone rings. 

 

Luka groans. “Who the hell is calling this early on a Sunday morning?” He reaches for his phone on the nightstand while Abby continues what she started.

 

“Let it ring..” Luka’s eyes cross as she slides her hand down to his waistband and licks his ear. “Seriously, Luka.”

 

“Abby, it might be important.” He reluctantly dislodges her fingers which had started getting  _ very  _ busy on a very interested part of him. His body screams in protest. He sits up anyways. “Fuck.” He fumbles with the phone. “Hello?” He grins at Abby who is sitting up now and pouting at him.

 

“Luka?”

 

“Carter?” Abby rolls her eyes and grins, trying to muffle her snickering. “Hey. What are you doing calling so early?” He bops Abby over the head with one of the pillows when she makes an exaggerated fainting motion. “Where are you?”

 

“Paris. Sorry, I wasn’t thinking.” Carter chuckles. “What is it there? Eight?”

 

Luka shakes his head. “Seven. I think. We were just….ah, waking up.” Luka tries not to laugh as Abby flips her hair over her shoulder and flutters her lashes at him. Fails. “So what’s up?” He manages.

 

Luka can practically hear Carter evaluating the scene on the other side of the Atlantic. “Ah, sorry again. Abby right there?”

 

“Yeah.” Luka shifts his eyes over again. She’s continuing her playacting, on her back, legs in the air, examining her toenails. “Being an idiot.” She pinches him.

 

Carter chuckles again. “I miss you guys. Which is kinda why I’m calling. I’m heading to Chicago at the end of the week to go over some final details on the Carter Center before the opening.”

 

“Right. That’s in May?” Luka grabs Abby’s hand before she can start messing with him again, which is what she was angling for. 

 

“Yeah. I think Morris is going to try and do that ceremony for Pratt’s scholarship around the same time. Are you guys going to make it?”

 

“Don’t know. We’ll try.” Luka sighs. “Going back might be hard for awhile.”

 

Carter is silent. “Yeah.” He clears his throat. “So I’m looking at flights. I was thinking about maybe coming to see you guys on the way home on Thursday. I still haven’t met Joe.”

 

Luka smiles and strokes Abby’s hand. “We’d like that. What time would you be in?”

 

“Five.”

 

“Okay. Call us when you have the details worked out and we’ll figure out what we’re going to do.” Luka flops back on the pillow. “It’s too bad it’s this week. Susan and Chuck are coming the following.”

 

“Really? Yeah. That’s a bummer. But I’d like to spread things out anyways. Too many people at once makes me twitchy these days.”

 

Luka laughs. “I hear that. We’ll talk to you soon.”

 

Luka ends the call and rolls over to grin at his wife. “You are such a pain in the ass.” He laughs when she sticks her tongue out at him. “Carter wants to see us.”

 

“I got the gist. When?”

 

“Thursday.”

 

Abby nods. “Kind of out of the blue, isn’t it?”

 

Luka shrugs. “He just said he misses us. And he wants to meet Joe.”

 

Abby smiles. “Yeah, he still hasn’t. Which is weird. The one time he managed a visit was at the hospital. It will be good to see him.” She shifts over and tangles her legs with his again as he nods. “So, back to..”

 

Luka lifts a brow. “You’re not serious. I just got off the phone with your ex. The guy you almost married.” But he’s grinning.

 

Abby snickers. “The guy you used to screw with over me all of the time. I distinctly recall a  _ lot _ of ass grabbing whenever Carter could see us.”

 

Luka starts laughing and can’t stop. He falls back against the pillows again. “Jesus, we were idiots, weren’t we? All of us.”

 

Abby gives up on her conquest and snuggles up against him. “I always thought you weren’t jealous of him when we were together.”

 

Luka looks down at her with an incredulous expression. “Seriously?”

 

“Yeah. It kind of bugged me.” She trails her fingers over his chest and plays with the patch of hair. “I know how dumb that is. Jealousy is an ugly emotion anyways. But it’s human. I just kind of wished you had seemed like you cared about it more, that’s all.”

 

Luka shifts so that he can look down at her. “Abby. I cared about it a lot. It’s why I never said anything. For one thing, I know my reactions to that kind of thing can be...violent. And I was Carter’s supervisor. For another, I didn’t want to push you away with it. I knew very well that you only saw Carter as a friend when we were together. But you talked to him more than me.” He puts a finger over her mouth when she opens it to speak. “I know why. Not just the friendship and the sponsoring. I wasn’t exactly an open book back then. Carter talked to you when I wouldn’t. I’m sorry for that.”

 

Abby nods. “I’m sorry I didn’t push you more.” She grins when he chuckles. “Looking back, I can see it. Like the ass grabbing. And the dueling. But at the time, it just seemed like you were above it all and it kind of pissed me off. Because I wasn’t.” 

 

Luka snickers and leans down to kiss her. “Well, it all worked out in the end didn’t it?” He shifts her over so she straddles him and pulls her mouth down to his. “I got the girl.” He whispers and slides his arms up her back. “But we weren’t a couple for the dueling.” Luka chuckles against her mouth when she pokes him in the ribs. He’s just about to pull her pajama top over her head when there’s a wail from the baby monitor. He drops his hands and sighs. “I guess it’s our morning for interruptions. Do you want me to get him?”

 

Abby shakes her head and slides off from him, feeling wonderfully wanted. “No. He usually wants me in the morning. We’ll have to finish this later.”

 

Luka watches her go and decides that a cold shower is definitely in order.

 

*********************************************************

 

“We need to go to the grocery store.” Luka slides the omelet he’s making onto a plate and starts the next. “We’re out of eggs. And just about everything else.”

 

Abby nods from the table. “I know. It’s on my list. I wanted to work on the guestroom today. Can you handle shopping?”

 

Luka nods. “Sure. I’ll take Joe.” He glances over to where Joe is playing trucks in the corner. “I always get lots of attention from the ladies when I shop with him.”

 

Abby gives an absent “Hmmm.” 

 

Luka’s brow furrows. “What’s wrong?”

 

“What? Oh. Nothing.” She smiles at him. “I just realized I’m low on a couple of prescriptions and I need to make a doctor’s appointment. I don’t have an OBGYN here.”

 

Luka nods. She needs to have her hormone levels monitored after the hysterectomy so it’s important that she find someone. “Have you asked Dawn?”

 

Abby shakes her head. “No. I just realized it. I’ll ask her tomorrow. Or I could call Janet. She knows everyone.”

 

“That’s true.” Luka slides a plate in front of her and turns to get Joe. “Eat.”

 

Abby picks up her fork and studies Luka as he settles Joe in his seat and gets him his food. He kisses their son on the top of his head before settling with his own plate. “Would you want another one?”

 

“Another what?” Luka replies absently as he reaches for the newspaper. Her words sink in when she just continues to watch him. “Abby.” He says softly. 

 

“I know this is a weird time for such a huge discussion. But if things were different, would you want another child?”

 

Luka takes a bite of his omelet and seems to ponder. He reaches over with his free hand to take hers. “I don’t know the answer to that.”

 

Abby shakes her head. “But if I could have…”

 

“Abby. No. It’s not if  _ you _ could have. It’s if  _ we  _ could have. The fact that you can’t carry another child because of a medical procedure doesn’t make any difference.  _ We  _ can’t have another baby.”

 

She nods. “Okay. I get what you’re saying, but the fact remains..”

 

“The fact remains that I love you. The fact remains that you’re my wife, and we can’t have another child. That’s sad, but let’s be honest here, would you have wanted to do it again?”

 

Abby is quiet for a moment, and kind of surprises herself with her answer. “I think maybe I would have. As scary as having him was….we’re good parents. I’m a good mom. You’re a great dad. So yes. I would have probably wanted to do it again.”

 

Luka squeezes her hand. “Okay. So what does that mean?”

 

Abby lets out a breath. “I really don’t know. We’ve never really talked about it.”

 

Luka gives her a tender look. “Abby. Baby, you have to know that I’m completely happy and fulfilled with you and Joe. Another child might be fun, and add to our family. But I don’t need it. If that’s part of what’s driving this train of thought.”

 

“A little. But mostly, it just hit me watching you kiss Joe. I was reminded rather violently that we can’t do it again.”

 

“There are ways. We could look into a surrogate. Or adoption. If that’s what we want.” Luka smiles. 

 

She shakes her head. “I don’t know. Let’s put a pin in this and maybe bring it back up later. It’s something we would need to think long and hard about.”

 

Luka smirks. “Right. Not like me knocking you up literally the first time we slept together in four years.”

 

Abby laughs. “Yeah. Definitely not like that.” She squeezes his hand. “Thanks. You’ll go to the store?”

 

“Sure.” He looks over to Joe. “What do you think, pal. Should we go to the store and get out of mama’s hair for awhile?”

 

“Store! Candy!”

 

Luka grins sheepishly at Abby’s stony stare. “What? He gets a treat at the store when he’s good.”

 

“Yeah. And daddy gets himself a donut. Don’t think I’m not onto you Kovač. She grins when he shrugs. “Watch it, I might leave you for a younger, hotter model if you get fat.”

 

He rises and leans over to kiss her. “But at least I won’t go bald.” Luka lifts Joe out of his chair to get him ready. “Do you have the list?”

 

She tears it out of her notebook and hands it to him. “Have fun and behave yourselves.”

 

Luka just grins at her and carries Joe out of the kitchen. 

  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  



	21. Chapter 21

Abby parks the car and climbs out to walk toward the terminal. Luka had stayed behind to finish dinner. It didn’t make any sense for both of them to make the trip, having to bundle Joe into his outdoor gear and carseat. She’d volunteered to get Carter, partially because Luka was the better cook, and partially so she could have some time alone with him. Luka understood. There were no lingering worries in his mind at all in regards to Carter and Abby.

 

She pulls open the door and sees him coming down the ramp. He looks thinner, and has a beard again, but otherwise, he looks like Carter. He sees her and a wide grin spreads across his face as he shifts the duffle over his shoulder and heads in her direction. 

 

Abby smiles when he gets to her and enfolds her in a huge hug. “Hey. You’ve got that stupid beard again.”

 

Carter laughs and lets her go. “Yeah.” He looks her over. “You look great. Where’s the big guy?”

 

“Home finishing up dinner so we all aren’t poisoned.” She starts heading toward the door to head to the car. “We decided that was the safer choice.”

 

Carter nods. “Probably true.” He shoulder bumps her. “It’s really great to see you.”

 

Abby grins and bumps him back. “Back at you.” They arrive at the car and Carter dumps his bag in the backseat, and they climb in.

 

“You’re cool with me crashing for the night?”

 

“Sure. Luka will drop you here on his way to work in the morning. My hospital is the opposite direction.”

 

“Whatever works. So you guys are liking it here?”

 

Abby smiles a little. “You know? We are. I think both of us just wanted out of Chicago, and we didn’t care where we went.” She’s quiet for a moment and Carter knows better than to push. “I suggested Boston because I’d been here once and liked it.” She shrugs. “Luka ran with it.”

 

“What happened, Abby?” Carter watches her face as she drives. 

 

She gives a huge sigh. “Jesus. You and Luka. I always forget how easily you can both read me.”

 

“Sorry..”

 

Abby shakes her head. “No, it’s fine. I relapsed.” She glances over at Carter’s nod. “It was bad, John. Really bad. I wasn’t sure I would come back.” She knows she can talk to him about this and he’d understand better than most.

 

Carter reaches a hand over and squeezes her forearm. “I’m sorry.”

 

Abby closes her eyes and nods. She drives again as the light changes. “Luka had to go home to Croatia. He was gone a lot longer than we thought he’d be. Almost six months. He literally left a week after our wedding.”

 

“Which I’m still pissed I didn’t get an invite to.” He smiles over at her.

 

She smiles a little. “Sorry. The jerk sprung it on me out of nowhere. It was just everyone from work. Maggie wasn’t even there.”

 

“I’m sure it was great anyways. Knowing him.”

 

Abby nods. “It was. It was everything I could have wanted.” She sighs. “It snuck up on me. I was sad, and frustrated, and angry with him for not being home. Angry at myself for  _ being _ angry with him because he was gone to take care of his dying father. Then Joe got hurt.” She takes the highway exit. “It was all too much. So I started drinking. I won’t go into the details, but I almost destroyed everything. I’m lucky Luka forgave me.”

 

Carter sits quietly. “Luka’s no saint, Abby. And he loves you. We both know that better than anybody else.”

 

Abby nods. “I know it. And one of the good things to come out of it is that he  _ finally  _ gets it. He understands the disease.” She smiles a little. “He did a bunch of reading while I was in rehab. And he actually listens to me instead of blowing it all off. The change has been incredible. It helps so much.”

 

“Is he doing Al-Anon?”

 

She shakes her head. “I haven’t pushed him on that. He’s not exactly the support group type.” She glances over with a grin when Carter snorts. “Yeah. But we’ve been seeing this couples therapist. It’s helping.”

 

Carter nods. “I’m happy for you. You seem happy.”

 

She pulls into the driveway. “I am. We are. This is home.”

 

Carter looks up at the distinguished old brick house. “Wow. A far cry from Luka’s apartment in the meatpacking district.”

 

“Hey. That was a great place.” 

 

They climb out of the car and head to the house. She pushes open the door and Carter calls out “Honey! We’re home!”

 

Luka appears from the kitchen wiping his hands on a towel and wearing a huge grin. He crosses the space in three long strides and catches Carter in a bear hug. Abby stands back and watches the reunion between two men who were both so important to her. They’d gone from colleagues to rivals to friends. The strange bromance they had developed in the Congo had developed into a steady and true friendship. It made her heart happy to see it. 

 

Luka takes Carter’s bag and dumps it at the foot of the stairs. “How was your flight?”

 

“Endless. You’d think I’d be used to it by now, but it still sucks.” He shakes his head and follows Luka into the kitchen. A sandy haired boy with Abby’s eyes and Luka’s smile toddles over to grip his father’s leg. Luka hauls him up and turns toward Carter. 

 

“Joe, say hello to Uncle Carter.”

 

Joe studies him with wide eyes and his thumb in his mouth. “Hey, Joe.” Carter gives a little wave.

 

Joe reaches out his arms and Luka passes him over. They watch each other solemnly until Joe says “Hi.” and pats his face. Carter feels a little hitch in his heart. His own son would be five now. But he was so incredibly happy for Abby and Luka that he smiles wide. 

 

“He’s beautiful, guys.”

 

“He looks like Abby.” Luka shakes his head and turns to the oven where he pulls the pot-roast out. 

 

“I’d say he’s a good blend of you both.” Carter turns to smile at Abby. Joe reaches out his arms to his mother and Carter passes him over. “I never heard the story of how exactly this all happened.”

 

Abby snorts. “I yelled at him. He got me pregnant to shut me up.” 

 

Carter chokes on the sip of Coke he was taking from the bottle Luka had handed him. “Excuse me?”

 

Luka gives a half grin, half glare at Abby. “That’s not...Okay. That’s exactly what happened.”

 

“This sounds like a story.”

 

Luka arranges the potatoes and carrots around the roast on a platter, hefts it. “It is. Let’s eat and we’ll tell it to you.” He heads through the alcove into their dining room.

 

Abby follows with Joe and snickers. “We’ve lived here for almost five months and we’re gonna use the dining room for the first time for  _ Carter _ ?” She teases.

 

Luka grins. “He’s rich. I didn’t want to force him to slum it.”

 

Carter shakes his head. “You guys are a riot.” He settles himself and watches how easy they are with each other. It was interesting to see them like this when he wasn’t looking through a lens of jealousy, but one of deep affection. He serves himself from the platter Luka passes him. “No, I’m serious though. Tell me how all of this happened. When I left County, you were living with Sam.” He nods at Luka. “Then I see Pratt in Africa and he tells me you guys are back together and having a baby. I missed a lot, apparently. We haven’t really had the chance to catch up for awhile.”

 

Luka shrugs. “What Abby just said is basically true. Sam and I broke up. Abby was right there, like always.” Luka reaches absently for her hand and Carter grins behind his napkin. “She helped me get over it. Then one night, she came over to yell at me about something.”

 

“ _ Someone _ is more like it.” Abby turns to Carter. “Susan left and Kerry had to hire an attending quickly. We ended up with this crazy guy from New Jersey. Clemente. He and Luka…”

 

“We pretty much hated each other.”

 

Abby grins. “Yeah. There was a lot of back and forth and massive pissing contests. They got into it over this young girl who…”

 

Luka brings her hand to his lips. The subject of Sydney still made her sad, and he knew it. “It’s a long story. But I put Abby in the middle. Which I never should have done. So she came over to bitch me out over it.” 

 

Abby grins. “Yeah. And well, I ended up pregnant.”

 

“Yeah, I don’t need the details of that.” Carter smirks.

 

“I didn’t think so.” Abby wags her fork at him. “We decided to have the baby, and we realized…” she trails off. 

 

“You realized you were always meant to be with each other.” He shrugs when Luka stares at him. “I’m not stupid, Luka. I know you never got over her.” He points at Abby. “And you always cared about him. Even when we were together.”

 

Abby couldn’t deny it, so she shrugs. “I’m sorry.”

 

“No. I didn’t mean it like that. Really.” He smiles when Abby lifts a brow at him. “This is really good. I’m happy for you both. We never would have worked long term.”

 

Abby shakes her head. “We probably would have killed each other.” She grins at Luka. “Not that I haven’t considered murder with this one.”

 

Luka laughs. “You’ve threatened to smother me a few times.”

 

“That’s just to get you to stop snoring. It’s really bad.” She says to John.

 

He shrugs. “Get some earplugs.” When Abby laughs at that, he grins. “So you’re liking your hospitals?”

 

“Yeah. Business as usual. What about you?” Abby lifts a brow at him again. Something was going on. “How’s Kem?”

 

John sighs. “She’s fine. We’re...well, things aren’t great.”

 

“I’m sorry.” Abby watches with sympathy. 

 

He shakes his head. “I love her, and she loves me. We just can’t seem to get it right.”

 

Luka leans over and squeezes his shoulder. “Keep trying. That’s something I’ve learned over the past few years.” He smiles at John. 

 

Carter smiles back. “Yeah. You guys would know, huh?.” He shakes his head again. “So enough about that. I didn’t come here to bum you out. So Susan and Chuck are coming next week?”

 

Abby glances at Luka and smiles. “Yeah. Over Cosmo’s school break.”

 

“Wait. Cosmo’s in  _ school _ ?”

 

Luka laughs. “I had the exact same reaction. They grow up fast.”

 

Carter glances at Joe who is squishing one of his potatoes between his fingers. “I guess so. Who would have thought the two of you would have a two year old?”

 

Abby laughs. “Not us. But there he is. Joe, stop that.” She reaches over to take the potato from him and he gives her a pathetic look and a sigh. Like she was stealing all of his fun. 

 

Carter grins, as he looks  _ exactly  _ like Abby in that moment. He glances at Luka who grins at him.

 

After dinner, Abby takes Joe up for bedtime and he helps Luka clear up. 

 

“We’ve got coffee, tea, Coke, Diet Coke, juice and water. Pick your poison.”

 

Carter smiles. “What, no Kool-Aid?”

 

Luka laughs. “Actually no. Abby’s like the sugar Nazi with Joe.”

 

“Seriously? The Pop-Tart Princess?”

 

Luka shakes his head. “I know, it’s pretty hilarious, actually.”

 

“I’ll take the Coke.”

 

Luka pulls two out of the refrigerator and jerks his head toward the living room. They head in and settle on the couch. “No alcohol in the house, huh?”

 

Luka studies him. “She told you?”

 

Carter takes a sip of his Coke. “Yeah. Ah, I hope that’s okay with you.”

 

Luka snorts. “We’re gonna start worrying about that  _ now _ ?” He shakes his head. “It’s fine. I’m glad she can talk to you about it.”

 

“She didn’t tell me everything.” 

 

Luka nods. “It was bad, John. I wasn’t sure I was going to be able to forgive her. But…” He shrugs. “Here we are. And I’m thankful everyday for it.”

 

Carter watches him. “She also told me that you understand the disease now. And that’s made all the difference to her.”

 

Luka silently takes a drink from his Coke. Sighs. “It used to piss me off when you would scold me for letting her drink. I’m an ER doc. I know what addiction looks like. It wasn’t Abby.”

 

He nods when John just quirks a brow at him. “Yeah, I get it now. It looks different on everyone. But I had never really seen her in  _ active  _ addiction before. Neither did you.” He says when Carter shakes his head. “When I came home from Croatia, she was a mess. She managed to hide it for awhile, but I knew something was off. I thought she’d fallen out of love with me or something.” Luka shrugs. “Stupid of me. But she finally admitted what was going on, and I could see it. Plain as day. She went to rehab, and we’re working everything out. She’ll have a year on Christmas Day. I’m proud of her.”

 

Carter smiles at him. “Good. I’m glad you’re helping her with it. I’m glad you guys are as happy as you seem to be.”

 

Luka quirks a smile at him. “All thanks to you.”

 

“Luka…”

 

He shakes his head. “I’m serious. We talked about some things with the therapist. I won’t get into why your name came up.” He snickers when Carter rolls his eyes. “But one thing is clear. I’m here because you saved my life.”

 

Carter shrugs and clears his throat. “I couldn’t leave you there. Abby never would have forgiven me.”

 

Luka grins. “You’re probably right. Still, I don’t think I ever really thanked you. So thanks. For my life.”

 

Carter shifts a bit uncomfortably. “Ah, is this a European thing? Getting all mushy?”

 

Luka laughs. “I guess it is.” He glances behind Carter to see Abby watching them. He holds out his hand to her and she walks to them. She leans down and kisses Carter on the forehead.

 

“Thanks from me too.” She doesn’t protest when Luka pulls her down in his lap. 

 

Carter clears his throat. “Geez you guys. I didn’t expect all of this.”

 

Abby lifts a brow at him. “What did you expect?”

 

He laughs a little. “I don’t know. To spend some time with friends I’ve been neglecting. I know you have your own lives, and so do I. But I missed you two.”

 

Luka grins. “Same here. We’re glad you came.”

 

“Me too.”

  
  
  
  



	22. Chapter 22

“So Boston Med, huh?” Carter climbs into the car with Luka.

 

“Yeah. It was a good fit.” Luka sighs. “When Abby and I were...well, when I was thinking about leaving, I worked in a Hospice for awhile. It was an interesting experience, but not what I wanted. I’m an ER doctor.” He shrugs and smiles a little. “I thought about calling you to see if you wanted help. But that felt like running away again.”

 

Carter nods. Luka knew all about running. “But you didn’t.”

 

Luka glances over at Carter as he waits at a light. “No. I couldn’t. Not just because of Abby, but because of Joe. We’re a family. I couldn’t just leave them behind. Even if Abby and I weren’t together.”

 

“Of course not. You’re a good man, Luka.”

 

“Not really.” Luka gives a little grimace.

 

“Yes, you are. For all of the shit you’ve had thrown at you in your life, you’ve always done the right thing. That’s a good man in my book.”

 

“Is that what you think I’m doing with Abby? The right thing?”

 

Carter is silent for a moment and watches Boston go by. “Yes. But I think you’re doing the right thing because you love her, and you need to be with her. That’s different than just doing the right thing because you have to.” He glances over. “I watched you two last night. In a different way than I’ve ever been able to before. I’ve never seen either one of you happier.” He says quietly.

 

Luka sighs and smiles. “You’re right. Thanks for that.” He takes the exit toward Logan. “I’m glad you came. It was really good to see you.”

 

“Same. Are you guys going to try to make it in May? I’m sure everyone would love to see you. Kerry and Susan are already in.”

 

“It would be great to see everyone. It just depends on our schedules. It’s not just the opening, it’s the ceremony for Pratt too.” Luka looks pained.

 

“I’m sorry about that. He was a good guy.”

 

Luka smiles. “He was my best man. Since you weren’t around to do it.”

 

Carter snickers. “I hear you were a jerk and sprung it on her out of nowhere.”

 

Luka gives him an amused glance. “So? How else was I going to get her to do it?”

 

Carter laughs fully. “Sneaky. But apt.”

 

“Yeah. It worked. Even with everything that apparently happened that Abby and I had no idea about.” His lips quirk. 

 

Carter gives a confused glance and shrugs when Luka remains silent. “Anyways, I’m going to talk to Morris while I’m there this time. Try to coordinate things.”

 

“Morris has grown up.” Luka smiles.

 

“Yeah, he has. It’s a little scary.”

 

“Do you know he has like, four kids?”

 

Carter chokes. “What?”

 

Luka laughs. “Yeah. He ah, donated to a sperm bank apparently. They all tracked each other down.” He waves a hand. “There was some hacking involved to get his name. They showed up in the ER one day.”

 

“That’s….” Carter is dumbfounded.

 

“Yeah.” Luka pulls up in front of the airport and parks. “Stay in touch a little more often, huh?”

 

Carter climbs out and comes around the car to where Luka is standing, arms on the open door. “Same goes.” He holds out his hand and isn’t surprised when Luka pulls him into a crushing hug. 

 

“Take care of yourself, Carter.”

 

*********************************************************

Luka lets himself into the house at the end of the day, which had been endless. After he’d dropped Carter off and gotten to work, the snow had started. MVC’s and a snowplow accident and one hit-and-run of a six year old. Luckily, they’d managed to save him, but it had been touch and go. He shrugs out of his coat and hangs it in the closet, wondering why the house was so quiet. He wanders in to find Abby stretched out on the couch, sound asleep. He grins and moves over to slide his icy fingers over her shoulders. He’d forgotten his gloves again.

 

Abby shoots out of sleep with a scream. “Jesus Christ, Luka.  _ Why  _ do you do that?”

 

He collapses next to her laughing. “I’m sorry. It’s just so easy.”

 

Abby rolls her eyes. “Men.” She mutters. She looks over at him, his eyes are closed now. “Long day?”

 

He reaches over to take her hand. “Yeah. Glad it’s over. Now we’ve got the whole weekend.” Luka smiles over at her. “Did you eat?”

 

“Yeah. Joe’s been down for an hour. He was trying to stay up to say good night, but that didn’t happen. Did  _ you  _ eat?”

 

Luka nods. “I grabbed a burger on the way home. I missed lunch.”

 

“Carter got off okay?”

 

“I think so. The snow didn’t start until after his flight was scheduled.” He shrugs. “I imagine he was in the air before the worst of it hit.” Luka turns his head to smile at her. “He told me this morning that we both look happier than he’d ever seen us.”

 

Abby traces her thumb over his wedding band. Smiles. “That’s sweet.”

 

“He said he watched us in a way he’d never been able to before.” Luka shrugs again. “I guess he meant without being a jealous ass.”

 

Abby grins. “Probably.”

 

He’s quiet for a minute. “You told him about the relapse?”

 

Abby turns her head. “Yeah. Does that bother you?”

 

Luka shakes his head. “No.” He smiles a little when she just stares. “ _ Really _ . I know you guys have a bond over that. It’s important that you talk to people who understand it from your side.” 

 

“Thanks. I wasn’t sure how you’d feel about me talking to him.”

 

Luka nods. “I get it. But it’s really okay.” He squeezes her hand. “I’m going to take a shower. I feel disgusting.”

 

Abby smiles and lets him go. She rises and starts the nightly routine of shutting lights off and locking the doors. She checks on Joe before heading into the bedroom. She hears the water running and cocks her head. She could use a shower herself. 

 

Abby quietly steps into the bathroom and sheds her clothes. Luka is leaning his hands against the tile with his head under the spray. The steam is so thick she’s surprised he can breathe. Abby slides her hands around his waist and down. She feels him jerk and then relax. He takes her hand in his while it continues to roam. “Careful. My wife could come up here any minute.”

 

Abby rises on her toes and bites his shoulder. “Screw her.”

 

Luka turns with a grin and grips her hips. “Sure.”

 

Abby laughs as his mouth comes down to cover hers. His hands slide around to grip her butt and pull her closer. Their height difference is both a challenge and an asset, so he hitches her up so her legs wrap around his waist. He backs her up against the wet tiles and lowers his mouth to her breast.

 

Abby’s breath hitches as she runs her fingers through his hair and closes her eyes. Sensation careens through her when his hand slides between them to pleasure her. She wraps her legs tighter and trusting his strength, runs her nails down his slick back. 

 

Luka hisses when he feels her nails bite into him. He lifts his head and looks into her eyes which are open now and clouded with what they bring to each other. Her hair is hanging in thick, wet ropes over her shoulders. He brings his hands to her face and draws her mouth up to his. “You’re beautiful, Abby.”

 

Her eyes widen in shock as he drives himself into her. His erection fills her to bursting and she wallows in the sensation of being taken like this. The sounds of flesh against flesh against tile echo in the room and he swallows her cries. Luka moans against her mouth as she comes and with one final thrust, empties himself. 

 

Abby’s legs slide slowly off his waist and she manages to stand, a bit wobbly, under the spray. Luka grins down at her, looking quite satisfied with himself. And with her. He hands her the soap. “Clean up. I think you got a little messy.”

 

She snickers. “You too. Turn around, I’ll wash your back.” She frowns when he obliges her. “Oops. Guess I got a little, ah, enthusiastic.”

 

Luka twists his head to look and then hisses when she hits the spots she had scratched. “It’s been awhile since you’ve done that.” He smiles at her.

 

Abby shrugs. “Well, you were fucking my brains out. I can’t be held responsible for my actions.” She slides her hands over his lean, strong back and thinks maybe she isn’t done with him for the night. She presses a kiss between his shoulder blades. “All clean. Now do me.” 

 

Luka quirks a brow when she turns and lifts her hair. He fills his hands with soap and slides them over her shoulder blades. Down her spine to the subtle dip in her waist, and the flare of her hip. He leans down to press a kiss to the top of her shoulder and slides his hands around to cup her breasts. He grins when she sighs and moans. “Rinse off. Water’s going cold.”

 

Abby is too warm to notice. “Huh?”

 

Luka laughs. “Rinse off, before we freeze to death.” He moves her gently under the spray. “We can finish this in bed. It will be easier on my back that way.”

 

Abby snorts and rinses the suds off. Luka shuts the spray down and pulls her out with him. He wraps one of the big towels around her and takes one for himself. She shakes her head and grabs another towel before following him into the bedroom.

 

“What’s that one for?” He gives her a confused glance.

 

She sighs and goes to pick up her comb from the dresser. “How long have you lived with me? Or women in general?”

 

“Oh. Right. Hair.” He grins as he watches her towel her hair dry and then start to work on it with the comb. “I never have been able to figure that one out.” He runs a hand through his own, scattering water. 

 

Abby shakes her head and sits next to him on the bed. “Another paradox of the universe when it comes to men versus women. You go to bed with your hair wet and uncombed and you wake up looking gorgeous. I do it, and I’ve got a rat’s nest to deal with in the morning.”

 

Luka trails a fingertip up her bare thigh as she continues combing her hair. He feels the muscles tremble and smiles a little. “I like you with a rat’s nest.” 

 

Abby’s lips quirk. “You’re just trying to get laid again.”

 

Luka pulls the comb out of her hand and tosses it. He pushes her back on the bed and rolls to cover her body with his. “So?” He murmurs and drops a kiss on her lips as he parts her towel.

 

Abby wraps her arms around him. “So...I have absolutely no objections to that.”

  
  
  
  
  
  



	23. Chapter 23

“Yo, Kovač. Package came for you.”

 

Luka looks up from his chart to see Daniels toss him an envelope. He catches it and smiles. “Thanks.”

 

“Is that..”

 

“I don’t know since I haven’t opened it yet.” Luka glances over and opens the padded mailer. The jewelry box falls out into his hand. “Yup. Thanks for the tip on that.”

 

“No problem.” He moves closer to get a look at what’s inside. “Wow. Shiny.”

 

Luka smirks at him. “That’s kind of the point, yeah?” He studies what’s in the box and decides it will definitely do. He starts to close it when Allie eans over to look.

 

“Wow. That’s really pretty. Who’s it for?”

 

Luka smiles at her. “My wife. It’s one of her Christmas presents, and I didn’t want to have it delivered to the house in case I wasn’t there. She’s got no willpower when it comes to presents.”

 

“Oh. Well, it’s really beautiful. I’m sure she’ll love it.” She walks away looking a little sad. 

 

Luka tries to ignore Gorsch and Daniels as they both snicker at him. He rolls his eyes. “I don’t get it. Everybody knows I’m married.”

 

“We don’t get it either. And there’s different levels of  _ married. _ ” Gorsch grins at him.

 

Luka shakes his head at that. “I guess. But hopefully she’ll realize soon that I’m pretty much at level one hundred.”

 

“Good luck with that.” Daniels shakes his head and walks away. 

 

Luka spends an hour running a trauma with Gorsch. A fall from an eight-story window. They managed to stabilize the patient and get him to surgery but it still looked dicey. 

 

“I’m going to take a break and get some air. I’ll be outside if you want me.” Gorsch waves Luka away and he gets his coat and heads out to the ambulance bay. He pulls out his phone and notes a text from Abby. “Get Chinese. I’ll get Joe.” He smiles and returns a “K.” He turns to sit on one of the benches and notes Allie already sitting there. Luka sighs and sits down beside her. “Hey. Taking a break?”

 

She glances over, and then quickly away. “Yeah. I can, ah...move.”

 

“Why? It’s a big bench.”

 

She shifts a little and smiles. “Okay. Um, I’ve been meaning to tell you something for awhile.”

 

Luka casts his eyes to the sky and braces for some crazy declaration. It wouldn’t be the first time. “Yeah?”

 

“I don’t have a thing for you.” She grins when he looks over at her with a confused expression. “Well, not like that.”

 

Luka chuckles. “Okay.”

 

“I know that’s what some people think, and whatever.” She waves her hand. “But that’s not it. I mean, you’re married. And old.”

 

Luka lifts a brow, a little insulted. “Old?”

 

Allie blushes crimson and looks mortified. “I’m sorry. I didn’t mean…” She rolls her eyes. “Let me start over. You remind me of my dad.”

 

Luka’s expression softens. “Really?”

 

“Yeah. He, ah, passed away last year. He was older than you, obviously, but still pretty young. He managed to hold on to see me graduate from nursing school.” Ali looks down at her hands. “I miss him so much. And you remind me a lot of him. That’s all. I just wanted to say.” 

 

Luka clears his throat, absurdly touched. “Ah, that’s really nice. My daughter would be about your age. A few years younger, but close.”

 

Allie looks confused. “I thought you just had Joe.”

 

“It’s a long story. I had a son and daughter back home in Croatia. They died in the war.” Luka smiles sadly. “So it’s nice to hear that I remind you of your dad.”

 

“I’m so sorry, Doctor Kovač. I didn’t mean to…”

 

“No, it’s fine. How could you know?” He smiles at her again. “But thanks, really, for clearing things up. The jokes were getting annoying.”

 

Allie grins and shrugs. “I know. I mean, I have a boyfriend.”

 

“And I’m old.” Luka grins at her when she laughs. 

 

“And married.” She smiles. “Ah, your wife will love her present.”

 

“She’d better. The damn thing was expensive.” He stands to go back inside. “Don’t stay out here much longer. It’s freezing.” Luka smiles at her when she nods and he heads back in. 

 

***************************************************

 

Luka finds Abby in the kitchen when he comes in the house, carrying a sack of Chinese food. She’s unloading the dishwasher while she sings and her hips are swaying back and forth to Stevie. She looks so damned cute, Luka is overcome with a rush of affection. He sits the food on the table and moves behind her. He slides his arms around her and presses a kiss to the back of her neck. “Hi.”

 

Abby turns in his arms and smiles. “Hi back.” She starts to step back when he just moves her into a slow dance to the beat of “Isn’t She Lovely?” Luka lowers his mouth to hers and kisses her breathless.

 

“Well. What was that for?” Abby reaches up and smooths his hair back from his face.

 

“Nothing. You looked cute. Singing and dancing. I couldn’t help myself.” He laughs when she raises her eyebrows at him. “Really.”

 

“Okay. What did you get for food?” She disentangles herself from him before they end up just making out in the kitchen for the rest of the night.

 

“Chinese.” Luka laughs and walks over to greet Joe when she rolls her eyes at him. He lifts him up and kisses his forehead. “How was your day, buddy?”

 

Luka catches “Kenny” and “New Woody” in the mix of babbling. He lifts a brow at Abby.

 

“Joe and Kenny are friends again. They bought an extra Woody so there wouldn’t be any further arguments.”

 

“Ah.” He settles Joe at the table and sits, listening intently to the story and not understanding half of it. 

 

Abby gets plates and chopsticks and joins them. “How was your day?”

 

“Okay. I’m apparently old.”

 

Abby laughs. “Well, kinda.”

 

Luka gives a mock scowl. “I am not.”

 

“Older than me.” Abby gives him a smug grin as she opens the bag to dig out the food cartons. 

 

Luka laughs at that. “You never let me forget it.”

 

“So why are you old?” She bites into an egg roll and studies him. “You’re still hot, for being an old man, by the way.”

 

He quirks a smile at her. “You’re still pretty hot yourself.” He grins when she sticks her tongue out at him. “That nurse that everyone thought had a crush on me?” Abby nods. “Turns out she doesn’t.”

 

“Well, okay.”

 

“She told me today that I remind her of her dad.”

 

Abby laughs. “Seriously?”

 

“Yeah.” Luka smiles softly. “I was a little insulted at first. Then I realized she’s only a couple of years older than Jasna would be.”

 

Abby reaches for his hand. “Luka.”

 

He shakes his head. “No. It was actually really sweet. And how could she know? But it sort of hit me all at once. My daughter would be twenty.”

 

“I’m sorry.” Abby traces her thumb over the back of his hand.

 

He shrugs. “It’s okay. It just made me wonder what she would be like, now. If she’d lived. What they all would be like.” He shakes his head. “And then I felt guilty because I wouldn’t have you and Joe if they had.”

 

Abby puts down her chopsticks and moves over to slide into his lap. “Luka.” She kisses the top of his head when he leans it on her shoulder. “I wish I knew what to tell you. Because I understand why you’re feeling that way, and there’s no easy answer to it.” She brushes her hand over his cheek when he nods. “What is, just is. That’s no reason for you to feel guilty.”

 

He sighs. “I know it. It’s just a hard thing to reconcile. If they’d lived, I’d never have known you. Joe wouldn’t exist. The thought of that…” Luka shakes his head. “It’s impossible. So it’s just hard.”

 

Abby tightens her arms around him. “It’s just life, Luka. I understand why you would have those thoughts. Don’t feel guilty about it, please?” She draws back to look into his eyes. “I know you love them. It’s okay. I  _ want  _ you to. It makes you the man you are.” She presses her lips to his. “The man I love.”

 

Luka swallows over the lump in his throat and runs a hand over her hair. “How did you get to be so wise?”

 

Abby pulls back and smiles at him. “What can I say? I’m a genius.”

 

He laughs as she climbs off of his lap to go back to her seat. “Abby?”

 

“Yeah?”

 

“I love you.”

 

“I know.”

 

***************************

 

Luka had considered cancelling the appointment. It was the day before Christmas Eve. He had a lot of shit to do yet. But the heaviness he’d felt since Allie had told him he’d reminded her of her dad wasn’t going away. The appointment with Monica couldn’t hurt, and might actually help.

 

“So Luka. Anything new since I saw you last?”

 

Luka gives a little laugh. “A few things. Oh, Carter called us out of the blue and came by for a visit.”

 

“How did that go?” Anders smiles at him.

 

“Fine. It was actually great to see him. It had been awhile.” Luka smiles. “Abby told him about the relapse, and I’m glad she can talk to him about it.”

 

“So you feel like she can’t talk to you?”

 

He shakes his head. “No. It’s just that he understands it on a level that I can’t.”

 

Monica lifts a brow. “And that doesn’t bother you?”

 

Luka gives a little chuckle. “No. It’s strange. I spent so many years being…” He waves his hand. “Whatever... about Carter. Now, I’m glad she has somebody who understands things so well. I can support her and love her and help her, but I’ve never been where they have.”

 

Monica smiles at him. “That’s a really good way of looking at it. And did you talk to him about what we talked about?”

 

“Yeah. It was good.”

 

“Excellent. What else is on your mind, Luka?”

 

He sighs. “There’s this nurse at work. She’s been acting strange and...I guess awkward around me since I started. Everyone, including me, assumed she had a, ah, a crush on me.”

 

Anders grins. “She didn’t?”

 

Luka grins. “No. She told me I reminded her of her father, who had passed away last year.”

 

“I see.”

 

“Yeah. It was actually a sweet thing for her to say and feel. I just...it hit me that she’s about the same age Jasna would have been.”

 

“Your daughter.”

 

Luka nods. “Yes. I talked it through with Abby, and she actually helped a lot. But it’s still bothering me.”

 

“What’s bothering you?”

 

“I can’t seem to…” His voice hitches, and he takes a breath. “I feel like I’m betraying Abby and Joe when I regret that Danielja and the kids died.” There. He’d said it. 

 

Anders sits back and crosses her legs. She sighs a little. “Luka, grief is a funny thing. We think we’re over something, and then it sneaks up and bites us on the throat.”

 

Luka nods. “I know that, believe me.”

 

“Feeling grief or regret, or joy and happiness, when you think of them; it doesn’t negate or even diminish what you have now.” She nods when he closes his eyes. “I think you know that. Why do you continue to punish yourself?”

 

Luka stares at her. “I’m not.”

 

“I think you are. Would Danielja or your kids have expected you to remain miserable? To never move on?”

 

“We never expected what happened. We were so young, and even though we were literally living through war, we never talked about what would happen if…” He sighs again. “Danielja wanted to get out of the city. I told her it would be fine. I needed to finish my residency and the kids shouldn’t have to be uprooted. We argued about it.” His lips quirk wryly. “It was one of the few arguments I ever won with her.”

 

“And of course you feel guilty for that.” 

 

“Of course I do. It was my fault that we were there.” Luka’s voice spikes louder.

 

“Who’s to say that something would have happened elsewhere?” Anders watches as Luka shakes his head. “These things can’t be explained. They just are. All we can do is move past it and try to move on. I think you’ve done an admirable job of that.”

 

Luka smiles sadly. “Someone else said something like that to me once.” He sighs. “I know all of this logically. I still have a hard time not feeling it.”

 

“Understandable. What did Abby have to say about it?”

 

He smiles fully now. “That I shouldn’t feel guilty. That she wants me to feel whatever I need to feel. It doesn’t make her feel like she’s less when I miss them.”

 

Anders smiles at him. “Wise.”

 

Luka snorts. “That’s what I called her. She surprised me, I have to say.”

 

“I’m not at all surprised. One thing I’ve learned from my work with the two of you is how connected you are to each other. When one of you is in joy or pain, the other feels it. That’s a deep and special kind of love.” Anders grins. “I’m a little jealous.”

 

Luka nods and laughs a little. “Thanks.”


	24. Chapter 24

“Hey Sophie, can you check vitals on my asthma girl in four?” Abby catches the busy nurse on her way by. 

 

“In a minute. I’m checking some test results for Hogan.” Sophie looks more frazzled than usual.

 

“Hey, don’t sweat it. I can do it myself when I go in.”

 

“No, that’s not your job. I’ll get it, just…”

 

“Sophie. It’s fine. I was a nurse longer than I’ve been a doctor. And you look really busy today.” Abby smiles at her. She remembered what it was like to be the nurse everyone looked for when they needed something done. Especially those docs who were men being idiots, like Luka or Carter. She smirks a little. “Besides, it wouldn’t hurt to keep my skills sharp in that area. It kills me how many docs can’t take a decent set of vitals.”

 

Sophie gives her a harried smile. “Thanks, Doctor Lockhart. That would be a big help if you don’t mind.”

 

“No problem.” Abby turns to the desk where Michaels has just stepped up. “Hey. Are you working tomorrow or actually taking a holiday off?”

 

Michaels grins. “Christmas Eve isn’t technically a holiday. Yes, I’m on. I tend to work holidays to let those of you with kids and spouses have a little time with them.”

 

“Luka and I used to do the same. It’s funny, even when we weren’t a couple, I've spent more Christmases with him than anyone else.” Abby shrugs and smiles. “That’s kind of nice now that I think about it.”

 

Dawn snickers. “Awwww.” She laughs fully when Abby rolls her eyes. “What did you get him?”

 

“He’s the world’s biggest pain in the ass to buy for. Like all men, when he wants something, he just buys it. There’s no talking to him about a list either. ‘Just get me whatever. I’ll love it’.” Abby speaks in a badly exaggerated Croatian accent. She grins when Michaels laughs even harder. “But I’ve got him pegged this year.”

 

“So what is it?”

 

“I’ll tell you after I give it to him. I don’t want to jinx it. It’s already been screwed up once before.”

 

Michaels lifts a brow. “Now I’m intrigued.”

 

“You should be. It will eventually involve you.” Abby laughs when Dawn’s jaw drops. “I’ve got patients.” 

 

Abby treats and discharges her asthma patient. She still takes a mean BP, thank you very much. She gets drawn into a trauma before she can finish the chart. Two hours later, she manages to get a minute to check in with Luka. “Hey. Did you get Joe?”

 

“I’m on my way to Anders office. Joe is happily settled with Katie watching movies. They’re having Mac and Cheese.”

 

Abby clears her throat. “Okay. You’re alright?” She’d been worried about him all week.

 

“Yeah. Hopefully this will help. I’ll be fine, Abby. Stop worrying about me.”

 

“Not going to happen.” She sighs. “I’ll see you at home then. You’ll probably beat me back.”

 

“Okay.”

 

“Love you.” Abby ends the call and heads to the desk to grab some charts and catch up. She was terrible about keeping up on her charting on her long shifts. She heads into the lounge to grab some coffee and start working on them.

 

Dawn is already at the pot and pours a second cup when she sees Abby come in. “Busy one today.”

 

“Yeah. I’m a terrible slacker about charting when it’s like this.”

 

“I’ve noticed.”

 

Dawn laughs when Abby blushes a little. “It’s fine. I do the same thing. Especially on long shifts. You always figure you have time to catch up.”

 

Abby points at her. “Yes.”

 

“So your Christmas present doesn’t involve an orgy or three-way does it?”

 

Abby chokes on her coffee. Then laughs. “No.”

 

Dawn grins at her. “Okay, just checking. Not that I would mind getting my hands on that husband of yours, but I’m not into group stuff.”

 

Abby smiles. It’s nice having built a friendship so quickly here. “I don’t blame you, on either count, but still no. It just involves some time off for me.”

 

Dawn lifts a brow. “Okay, when?”

 

“Not sure. We’ll have to figure it out.” She shrugs. “It will be a couple of months, at least. Maybe sometime in May. Around our anniversary.” 

 

“Fine. Just let me know when you have it figured out. I’ll make it work. We should have a new attending by then.”

 

Abby lifts a brow. “Jake?”

 

“Yeah, I sent him the letter last week. He called to accept today.”

 

“Good. That’s great.”

 

Dawn shakes her head. “This should be interesting.”

 

Abby just shrugs and gets to work on her charts. She manages to leave only fifteen minutes after the end of her shift, which may have been a record.

 

She walks into the house to find it completely quiet. She frowns, knowing Luka was home. She sheds her coat and drops her bag in the foyer, and makes sure the doors are locked.

 

Abby finds him upstairs, curled up in bed with Joe, sleeping. The scene nearly breaks her heart. They had obviously been reading a story together and fallen asleep. She wasn’t sure how Luka managed to fit himself into Joe’s bed, but he somehow had. Abby crosses the room and kneels down beside the bed. She strokes a finger along his shoulder and over his arm. “Luka.” She whispers. When he barely stirs, she pinches his biceps a little. “Luka, wake up.”

 

He turns over to look at her, blinking. “Hey. Woah.” He shakes his head. “I guess we fell asleep.” He smiles at her.

 

“Obviously.”

 

“Did you eat?” Luka reaches out and brushes his hand over her hair.

 

“Yeah, I grabbed something at the hospital.”

 

He lifts a brow. “Something?”

 

“I had a Pop-Tart and a bag of Cheese-Its, okay?”

 

Luka chuckles and shifts to sit up. “Where is your protein source?”

 

“Cheese is protein.”

 

“Cheese-Its do  _ not  _ have real cheese in them.” He scowls at her.

 

“Sure they do. It’s in the name.” She gets to her feet and pulls Luka to his. “I ate, okay? I’m not hungry. Just tired.” She bends down to pull Joe’s blanket up. 

 

Luka takes her hand to walk to the bedroom with her. He shakes his head at her while she goes to her dresser for pajamas and he sheds his clothes. “How did you ever survive without having severe malnutrition before I came along?”

 

“Good genes?” Abby smirks at him while she pulls on her pajamas. “I really don’t know. I’m happy I have you as my nutritionist now, though.”

 

He chuckles as she slides into bed beside him and curls up. “Happy to help.” Luka drops a kiss on the top of her head.

 

Abby slides her hand under his t-shirt to stroke his chest. “How did your session go?”

 

Luka is quiet for a minute and wraps his arm more tightly around her. “It was good. She said...she said basically the same thing you did. And that remembering them doesn’t diminish what we have now.”

 

“No, it doesn’t. I wish I could convince you of that.”

 

He nods and closes his eyes. “I know it. I think I can start to at least try to think of it that way.”

 

“Good.” Abby shifts to look up at him. “I hate seeing you like that.”

 

Luka opens his eyes and gives her a tender look. He lowers his mouth to hers and kisses her softly. “I know. I’ve spent so many years trying to push it aside. Get past it without working through it, you know?”

 

Abby nods. She knows exactly.

 

He’s quiet again. “But now that we  _ are  _ working through it, it’s bringing everything up again. I think it’s starting to feel okay. It’s not as painful.” Luka kisses her again. “I told you once that Niko accused me of running away, and that I wasn’t. I was running to you.”

 

Abby feels tears gather in her eyes. “Yeah.”

 

“That’s more clear now then it was even when I told you that. I love you, so much. I think we needed all of this to happen so that I could finally understand that this is where I was always meant to end up.”

 

Abby buries her head against his chest as her tears spill over. He strokes her back. “Luka.” She looks up at him again. “You’re the best thing that’s ever happened to me.”

 

He draws her head back down and cuddles her in. “Same goes.”

  
  
  


  
  



	25. Chapter 25

Abby walks into the house to the smell of Turkey roasting. She knows Luka has only been home for an hour or so. Curious, she wanders into the kitchen to find him at the table. 

 

“Hey. How come I smell food already?”

 

Luka looks up and smiles at her. “I got out early.” He rises to kiss her. “Joe’s down for a nap. Apparently even a half day at daycare wears him out.”

 

“Okay. And now we’re off for three and a half whole days. Wait.” Abby waves her hand. “You know what I mean.”

 

Luka chuckles. “Yes. I speak fluent Abby.” He pulls a bag of potatoes out of the pantry. “You’re in charge of these.”

 

Abby nods and sits when he hands her a bowl for the peelings and a big pot, along with the peeler. She knows he hates doing the potatoes. “Of course I am.”

 

Luka kisses the top of her head and sits again with his journal. “Thanks. So what do you want to do today otherwise?”

 

“I haven’t thought that far. We could probably get a head start on putting some of the stuff from Santa together so we’re not up half the night.”

 

Luka wiggles his eyebrows at her. “Maybe we’ll be up half the night for another reason then.”

 

Abby laughs. “Perv.”

 

He shrugs. “So?”

 

“No complaints here.” She smiles at him while she peels potatoes and dumps them in the pot. “Do you still have your antlers?”

 

He grins. “What is it with you and the costumes lately?” He shakes his head when she laughs. “I like it. Maybe I do.”

 

Abby lifts a brow. “Then maybe we’ll be able to negotiate something.”

 

“Do you still have that little Santa...thing?” He wiggles his fingers at her.

 

“Maybe. But maybe I have something new.”

 

He gives her that look he has that makes her go hot all over. “Hmmm. Definitely need to negotiate then.”

 

Abby clears her throat. “Well, we’ll talk about that later. Do you want to put the tricycle together at least?” She smirks at him. “Can you handle it?”

 

He scowls at her. “Of course I can.” He stands and flicks the top of her head with two fingers. “I’ll be in the garage.”

 

Abby laughs and finishes the potatoes. She rises to fill the pot with water, drains it, and then fills it with fresh water. Adds salt. She sits it on the stove to start when it’s time. Mashed potatoes are one of the few culinary skills she feels confident with. She wanders out toward the garage door and hears Luka cursing in Croatian. She leans against the door jamb. “Looks like you’ve got it.” She calls out.

 

He looks up at her, frustration in every line of his face. “Shut up. Don’t you have something else to do?”

 

“Nah. This is more fun.” She wanders out and checks the box where they’d put Joe’s gifts that needed to be assembled before Santa came. Pulls out a Hot Wheels race track. “I bet I could put this together.”

 

“Have at it.” Luka snarls at her. 

 

“Okay.” Abby sits at the little bench and pulls the track pieces out. The instructions are simple to follow, and it basically just snaps together, but she’s absurdly proud of herself. “Ta-da!”

 

Luka looks over and rolls his eyes. The tricycle is still in many pieces. “Good job. Now go away. You’re doing nothing here but being smug and annoying.” 

 

“Aw.” Abby snickers and wanders over to him. She crouches down and strokes his cheek. Leans in to kiss him. “Just think of all of the extra sexy time you’ll have once you get this done.”

 

His eyes cloud a little and he smirks at her. “I may have to charge you extra.” He slides his finger down her cheek. “But really. Go away.” 

 

Abby laughs and rises. “Boy, you get cranky when you’re frustrated. How long until the turkey is done?”

 

“About an hour.”

 

“Okay. I’m going to wrap some other presents.”

 

Luka nods when she heads back in. 

 

An hour later, she’s in the kitchen waiting for the potatoes to finish boiling when he comes in from the garage. 

 

“Told you I could do it.” Luka leans down to press a kiss to her neck.

 

Abby glances up at him. “So what you’re saying is, when we get him an actual bike, we have it assembled at the store.”

 

Luka smirks and a laugh rumbles in his chest. “Yes. That’s exactly what I’m saying.”

 

He goes to the oven to pull the turkey out, and checks the thermometer. “This is done.” He glances over and notes the still boiling potatoes. “Why don’t you go check on Joe? He probably shouldn’t sleep much longer or he’ll never sleep tonight.”

 

“True. You can drain those when they’re done.”

 

Luka nods and watches her go, and then sets to getting the rest of the food ready. When she comes back down, he takes Joe from her. “Your potatoes await.”

 

“Ha ha.” But she gets the milk and butter and finishes them.

 

They settle in the dining room. Hey, they’d broken it in for Carter. They might as well use it on special occasions. They hadn’t even bothered on Thanksgiving. “So what time is Susan’s flight in?” Luka asks her as he makes a plate for Joe.

 

“Noon. I figured we can all go and pick them up. There’s room in your car.” 

 

Luka nods. He had the SUV while Abby still drove a Subaru. “Okay. Did you think of any plans?”

 

“I made reservations at Cheers for Sunday night.” She shrugs when Luka grins. “It’s a touristy Boston thing. I figured they’d get a kick out of it. Other than that, not really. I ah, I want to hang with Susan on my own at least one of the nights they’re here.”

 

Luka nods. “Understood. I’ve already thought of some things to do for all male debauchery when you two do that.”

 

Abby snorts. She didn’t think Luka and Chuck could get in  _ too much  _ trouble with Joe and Cosmo in tow. “Okay.”

 

Luka reaches over and squeezes her hand. “I know you miss her. Neela too.”

 

Abby smiles a little. “I do, a lot. I like Dawn and Sophie, but they’re not Susan or Neela.”

 

“Have you talked to Neela lately?”

 

“Yeah. She’s still dating Brenner.” Abby shakes her head. “I didn’t get to know him well, but he seems a little smarmy.”

 

Luka shrugs. He’d never even met the guy. He just knew he was Anspaugh’s nephew. “Neela has never been very lucky in that department. Poor woman.”

 

Abby sighs. “I wish she’d just call Ray and work things out. It’s obvious she’s still in love with him.”

 

Luka smiles at her. “You of all people don’t get to make that statement.”

 

She rolls her eyes. “Okay. True. Sam was pretty smarmy too.”

 

Luka laughs. “Come on. She wasn’t  _ that _ bad.”

 

Abby snickers. “No, she wasn’t. She put my back up when I was going through….everything. She called me out and acted like a sanctimonious shrew. All of the things she’d done...and she was judging me.” She shrugs. “But I should stop taking shots at her.”

 

Luka watches her. “I didn’t know that.”

 

Abby tilts her head. “I didn’t tell you because I know you too well. I didn’t want you taking it on yourself.”

 

Luka shakes his head. “You should have told me.”

 

“Luka, there was no reason for it. Sam and I got along fine at work, and after the argument we had, we continued to work together fine. We were never really friends outside of the hospital anyways. You didn’t need to know that a woman you used to love treated your wife that way. I’m sorry I brought it up.”

 

He continues to watch her while he eats. He knew very well that Sam had a tendency to judge others while missing the plank in her own eye, so to speak. But it had never occurred to him that she would treat Abby that way. “I’m sorry. For whatever she said.”

 

Abby shrugs. “It doesn’t matter. I just was explaining why I’ve been so snotty about her lately. But regardless, it’s not your responsibility. It really had nothing to do with you.”

 

“Abby, if it had to do with you, it had to do with me.”

 

She blows out a breath. “Fine. But you know what I mean. Just forget it. It’s no big deal.”

 

Luka nods. It obviously  _ was _ a big deal, but she clearly didn’t want to discuss it any further. “Okay.” He reaches for more potatoes. “So, big present tonight?”

 

Abby is relieved at the change of subject. She smiles a little. Christmas Eve is for the presents that mean the most. “Of course. It’s tradition, now, right?”

 

“Right.” 

 

They finish dinner and clear the table. They work together to clean up the mess in the kitchen while Joe runs around like a maniac. When they finish, Luka scoops him up and hangs him upside down, causing Joe to shriek in delight. “It’s time to open your Christmas Eve present.”

 

Still hanging upside down, Joe squeals. “Present?”

 

Luka rights him and plops him on the couch. “That’s right. Mama and Tata have a tradition. You get to open one of your presents on the night before Christmas.”

 

“Santa?”

 

“Nope. This one’s from me and mommy.” He smiles when Abby hands over the box. Joe tears into it to find the brand new soccer ball. He stares up at his father, with an expression of awe and delight. 

 

“Ball!”

 

“That’s right. When the weather is nicer, Tata will show you some moves.” He grins when Joe launches himself up to hug him. Luka grins at Abby. “I guess that’s a hit.”

 

Abby smiles when Joe stands and reaches for her to hug him too. “Tank you mama.”

 

Abby ruffles his hair. “You’re welcome, Buddy. But don’t expect me to teach you anything when it comes to football. Give it a year. I’ll teach you baseball.” 

 

Joe squeals in delight again and hops off the couch to roll the ball on the floor. Abby sits and snuggles against Luka as they watch their boy play happily until his eyelids begin to droop. Luka smiles. “We should probably hang the stockings so Santa has something to fill.”

 

Joe looks up in wonder. “Santa coming?”

 

“Yeah. But you have to hang your stocking and then go to sleep. He can’t come otherwise.”

 

“Why?”

 

Abby snickers when Luka looks lost. “Because that’s the rule. Santa will know if you’re sleeping. He won’t come in if you’re awake.”

 

“Okay.” Joe scrambles up. “Stocking!” Abby helps him hang his stocking on the mantle while Luka snaps pictures this time. They hang their own on either side of his.

 

“Alright, time for bed.” Abby laughs while Joe scurries quickly ahead of her and starts to climb the stairs. “Santa should come every night.”

 

Luka shakes his head and laughs as he watches them go. He gets his briefcase out of the closet to retrieve Abby’s gift and then settles himself on the couch. She’s wearing a robe and has pulled her hair back when she comes back down, carrying a small, square box.

 

“He’s not sleeping yet.” Abby smiles at Luka and sits next to him. He catches the scent of the lotion she uses when she was in the mood to entice him. His stomach curls with lust. “He’s got his eyes squeezed shut so tight though that I can’t imagine he’ll last much longer.”

 

Luka nods. “He’ll go under soon.” His speech is stilted.

 

Abby glances over at him. “Are you okay?”

 

He leans over to nuzzle her and kisses her neck. “You know very well what you’re doing.”

 

She laughs in delight. “Yeah, but I didn’t think it would take hold so quickly.” Abby trails her finger down his throat, and tilts his head back. She leans in to kiss him. “But….presents first.”

 

Luka sighs. “You’re killing me. But okay.” He holds out the small box. “Open it.”

 

She pulls at the ribbon. “Did you finally get me that glass frog?” The smirk falls from her face when she sees what’s inside the box. “Luka…”

 

“I never got you an engagement ring.” He says softly. 

 

The ring is settled in the box shooting fire from the enormous diamond in the center. It was inset, with three stones nestled around it. Their birthstones, she notes. Garnet for her, emerald for Joe, and tourmaline for Luka. She looks up at him, stunned. “This is...wow.”

 

Luka smiles and tugs it out of the box. It wasn’t very often that Abby was lost for words. He slides it on her finger, above her wedding band. “It fits.”

 

She nods and swallows over the lump in her throat. “You knew it would.”

 

He shrugs. “Pretty sure. I guessed right on your wedding band.”

 

Abby continues to stare down at the ring. She wiggles her finger to watch it flash and fire. “It’s amazing.” She leans over to kiss him. “Thank you.” 

 

He runs a hand over her hair and sighs. “You’re welcome. I wanted to give you something to wear that would remind you of how much Joe and I love you.”

 

That did it. She launches herself over and straddles his lap. She takes his face in her hands and kisses him, hard. 

 

Luka strokes his hands up her back and chuckles against her mouth. “I don’t even have my antlers on.”

 

“I don’t care.” She pulls back and starts unbuttoning his shirt. 

 

He pulls her in and nuzzles her neck. “Maybe I want my present first…”

 

Abby pushes him back against the cushions. “Maybe this  _ is  _ your present.” She slides back on his lap and unbelts her robe, letting it slide off her bare shoulders. Underneath, she’s wearing a red silk chemise trimmed in white. It skims her bare thighs and dips in a low vee between her breasts. 

 

Luka swallows hard. He feels like, and probably looks like, he swallowed his tongue. “I can live with that.” He manages. 

 

Abby smiles slowly and and trails her finger down his bare chest. “I take it you like this one?” She slides up on his lap again and finds for herself that he definitely does. “Luka…” she murmurs, before leaning in and pressing her lips to his. 

 

He sighs and lets his hands roam. Having Abby in his arms was something that he never took for granted. Luka groans softly when she twines her arms around him and takes the kiss deeper. He manages to roll so they’re stretched on the couch, side by side. He trails a finger down her neck, along her shoulder to her collarbone. Luka smiles against her mouth when she gasps at his hand sliding under to cup her breast. 

 

He pulls back to watch her eyes blur while his thumb traces her nipple through the thin silk. Abby manages to lift a limp hand to slide his shirt over his shoulders. He helps her by shrugging out of it and leans in to nuzzle at her neck again. His tongue darts out and licks along the sensitive spot on the underside of her jaw. Luka feels her shiver and moves his hand down her body, to cup her center. He nearly loses his mind when he finds she’s not wearing anything under the chemise. She’s hot and wet and ready for him. 

 

He lifts his head and watches her face while he pleasures her. He lowers his mouth to her breast and murmurs “Let go, Abby.” He smiles in satisfaction when she comes against his hand, her hips rocking up and her breath coming fast between her lips. 

 

Abby lifts his head to kiss him again while he sheds his pants. He braces himself above her and slips inside her. Their twin groans are muffled by each other’s mouths as Luka starts to move. Slowly at first, to draw out the sensation of being there, together. Abby shifts and wraps her legs around him, encouraging him to go deeper. He drops his forehead to hers as he thrusts, faster now, as the passion builds even higher. Luka lowers his mouth to hers, tongue sweeping in while he keeps up the rhythm. He moans as he feels her muscles tighten around him and gasping, empties himself into her.

 

Luka drops down on top of her. He feels like he’d climbed a mountain. He smiles when she strokes his hair. “It’s funny how often this couch has been used for this purpose since we moved here.”

 

Abby smiles. “Well, sometimes you just can’t make it up to bed.”

 

He lifts his head to grin down at her. “That’s true. You are pretty insatiable.”

 

She snorts. “Yeah, it’s all me.” Abby sighs. “Do you want your present now?”

 

Luka shifts so that he’s sitting and pulls her up with him. “I thought you said that was it?”

 

She pulls the throw from the back of the couch and tosses it over him. “Cover up. Or you might never get your present.”

 

He grins at her while he spreads the blanket over his lap. She leans over to get the box she’d set aside. Luka trails his hand over her arm. “You know...I could live with that.”

 

Abby gives him a flustered and baffled look. “Hmmm. I think you’ll want this.” She slides over with it and hands it to him. 

 

Luka shifts her over so she’s curled up against him while he opens the box. When he sees what’s inside he’s just as stunned as she was over her present. He clears his throat. “Is this what I think it is?”

 

Abby smiles softly. “We never got our honeymoon.”

 

Luka feels tears gather at the corner of his eyes. Circumstances had forced them to postpone taking their honeymoon. They’d never even discussed it since. “Abby.” Inside the box are flight and hotel vouchers for Hawaii. Open dates, so they could decide when to go. 

 

“It’s time for us to take it.” Abby turns his face to hers. He leans over and kisses her softly.

 

Luka sighs and runs a hand over her neck. Squeezes softly. “I didn’t even realize how much I needed this.” He kisses her again. “Thank you.”

 

Abby snuggles into him. “You’re welcome. Can we just sit here and watch the tree for awhile, before we have to play Santa?”

 

Luka wraps his arm more tightly around her and leans his head on the top of hers. “I think that’s an excellent idea.”

  
  
  



	26. Chapter 26

“Mid-day traffic in this city sucks.” 

 

“Worse than Chicago?” Luka lifts a brow and gives his wife an amused glance. 

 

“Okay, no. But still. It’s 11:30 on the Saturday after Christmas. We shouldn’t be at a crawl on the highway.”

 

Luka reaches over and squeezes her hand. “Relax. We’ve got plenty of time.”

 

Abby sighs and settles back. “You’re right. I’m just annoyed. I didn’t think it would be this bad.”

 

Luka nods and taps his fingers on the steering wheel. He’s a little annoyed himself. “It’s fine. We’ll be there in no time. Really.”

 

Abby nods and turns back to check on Joe. He’d fallen asleep already. “Yesterday wore him out.” Abby’s brow furrows in concern. 

 

Luka laughs. “Christmas tends to do that to a two year old. He’ll be fine.” They’d all been up by six because Joe had. They’d spent the morning opening the mountain of presents and taking pictures to send to their families. Niko had been bugging Luka lately too. Abby had left to go to a meeting while Luka made them a low-key lunch. When she’d returned, with a fresh one-year coin, Luka had been so incredibly proud of her he’d been lost for words. The rest of the day had been spent making Christmas cookies and a lopsided snowman in the backyard. So yes, definitely a busy day. 

 

“I guess. I just hope he isn’t cranky the rest of the afternoon.” She gives a little sigh of relief when Luka  _ finally _ takes the exit for Logan. 

 

They park the car and head to the terminal. Abby checks the board to see that Susan’s flight had landed. “They’re on the ground. Not sure if they checked bags or not.”

 

Luka chuckles. Abby was excited to see Susan, and was doing her best to hide it. But he knew her too well. “Abby, they’re going to be here for a week. Of course they checked bags.”

 

“Right.” Abby turns to watch the ramp from the gate. She spots Chuck first, and smiles and waves. 

 

He sees her and nudges Susan. She looks over to see Abby, and her grin lights her face. She picks up her pace, dragging poor Cosmo who was trotting to keep up. She drops her carry-on and throws her arms around Abby. “Hi!” 

 

Abby hugs her hard. “Hi back.” She glances down at the sturdy boy with red hair and a smile like sunshine. “Hey Cosmo.”

 

Cosmo blinks up at her. “Hi.” 

 

Susan turns to Luka and throws her arms around him too. He envelopes her in his arms and lifts her off her feet, kissing the top of her head. She laughs. “You still give the  _ best  _ hugs.” 

 

He grins at her. “I’ve heard that.” He turns to Chuck and extends his hand. “It’s good to see you guys.”

 

Chuck smirks. “What? No hug for me?” 

 

Luka chuckles and pulls him in. “I’m not kissing you.”

 

Chuck snickers and turns to hug Abby. “So it looks like we’re here. Suze has a million things she wants to see.” He starts walking toward baggage claim. 

 

Abby grins. “There’s a lot. Luka and I both juggled our schedules a little this week. But you’ll be on your own a few of the days.”

 

Susan smiles at her. “I figured. No hospital is going to give new attendings the week after Christmas off. Just point us in the right direction. We’ll explore on our own just fine. Maybe we could even take Joe with us.” She looks at Joe, who was just waking up on Abby’s shoulder. “I can’t believe how big he is.”

 

“He takes after his dad. I’m starting to worry he’ll be taller than me by the time he’s six.”

 

Luka grins at her. “I told you, it will be nine.”

 

Abby rolls her eyes. “Anyways. I’m sure he’d love it.”

 

Chuck stops at the claim. “We need to rent a car…”

 

Luka waves that off. “Don’t be stupid. You can use one of ours. We’ll figure it out.”

 

Susan shrugs. “If you’re sure.” She sees her bag on the belt and grabs it. “So what’s on the agenda for today?”

 

“We thought we’d grab lunch at this place we like. If you’re hungry.”

 

Chuck grabs Cosmo’s bag and secures his own. “Starving. I mean, a cookie is great, but a man needs real food.”

 

They manage to get everyone situated in the car. It’s a tight squeeze, but as Cosmo is in a booster instead of a full-on carseat, they manage to fit everyone in. They chat happily until Luka pulls into the parking lot of Papa’s, the Greek place they’d eaten at months before. They’d become regulars since.

 

Luka grins at the hostess who had apparently gotten over wanting to jump him. Or she hid it better these days. “Hey Melina. Got a big table today?”

 

She smiles. “Sure. It’s kinda slow. Everybody’s eating leftovers.” She leads them to one of the big corner booths. “Will this work?”

 

Abby smiles at her. “It’s perfect. Thanks.” 

 

“I’ll let Michael know you’re here. And that he’s got a lot of you.” She winks at Joe and pats his head, then saunters away. 

 

Susan slides into the booth. “This is great. I love these local places. We found this diner by our place that reminds me so much of Doc Magoos I nearly cried in sentiment.”

 

“A patient recommended this place.” Abby smiles. “We’re only a couple of blocks from home. The hostess had a crush on Luka for weeks. I think she’s over it now.” 

 

Susan grins. “I never had that requisite crush on Luka. I wonder why?”

 

Luka grins back. “Thank God. That would have been weird.”

 

Abby laughs. “Yeah, it was too weird when Neela had it. Susan and Carter having their thing was bad enough.”

 

Susan snorts. “I had Carter first, you slut.”

 

Abby grins at her. “Speaking of Carter, he came to see us last week.” She pauses while Michael comes up to take their orders.

 

“How’s he doing? I talked to him a few months ago.”

 

Luka shrugs. “Sounds like same as usual. Maybe some problems with Kem.”

 

Susan sighs. “Yeah. I got that impression too. I wish those two would get it together.”

 

Abby smiles a little. “Me too. I think they will. You know Carter. It takes him awhile.”

 

Susan snickers. “That’s for damn sure. So what’s new with you guys?”

 

“Nothing much. Luka is an old man, and my boss offered my ex an attending position at my hospital.”

 

Chuck grins. “Same old, same old?”

 

Luka chuckles. “Pretty much. We’ve finally settled in here, I guess. Met some people we like. You know how it goes.”

 

Chuck nods. “I know exactly. Iowa City is great, I guess. But Boston seems super cool.”

 

Abby smiles at him. “We’re eating at Cheers tomorrow night.”

 

Susan laughs. “Seriously?”

 

“Yep. I’ve got our usual babysitter lined up. She’s happy to watch Cosmo too. If you want. She’s pretty great.”

 

“Yeah, I think that’s a great idea.” Susan smiles at Chuck. “We get a double date.”

 

“It’s been awhile.” He snickers at her.

 

Susan laughs again while their food is served. “We went with a friend of mine from work and her….well, I’ll need to tell you this story when there aren’t any little ears.” She glances pointedly at Joe and Cosmo who are digging into their meals.

 

Luka raises a brow. “My ears aren’t little.”

 

Abby swats him. “Stop.”

 

Susan rolls her eyes. “Anyways, So Jake got the position, huh?”

 

Chuck swallows a bite of lamb. “Wait, Jake? That Med student you were dating way back when?”

 

“The very same.”

 

“What do you think of that, big man?” He grins at Luka.

 

He shrugs. “Don’t care. Jake’s a good doctor. And Abby and I both worked with my ex for years. It’s just part of the job.”

 

Susan wrinkles her nose. “How  _ is _ Sam?”

 

Abby lifts a shoulder. “She was dating this guy Gates when we left. He’s actually perfect for her. They’re both so messed up, they make each other a little better.”

 

Susan snorts. “Sounds about right.”

 

Luka rolls his eyes. “I like Gates, but yeah. That’s about right.”

 

They finish the meal and head for home. 

 

“So, welcome.” Abby leads Susan up the stairs while Luka and Chuck head to the living room with the kids. “We figured we’d put Cosmo in with Joe, if that’s okay? We’ve got a bathroom off the master, so you won’t have to share this one with anyone but Cosmo.”

 

“Just like home.” Susan walks into the guest room to find a sunny area painted a warm green and a big bed heaped with pillows. “Wow, has Luka been watching Martha Stewart again?”

 

Abby scowls at her. “Hey. I did most of the work in here.”

 

Susan laughs. “Sorry. It’s great.” She turns and hugs her friend. “I’m so glad to be here. To see you guys.”

 

Abby hugs her back hard. “I’m glad you’re here. It’s been so long since we’ve seen each other in person.”

 

Susan turns and picks up their bags to put in the little closet. “So things are good? You look so happy.”

 

Abby smiles a little, and sits on the side of the bed. “I keep hearing that.”

 

“Well, you do. Luka too.” Susan sits beside her.

 

Abby shrugs. “This move has been really good for us. There was just too much…” She waves a hand “Stuff...in Chicago. Too many memories. We needed a fresh start.”

 

Susan nods. “I always knew you’d end up together.”

 

Abby gives her a baleful glance. “Oh _ really _ ? You could have clued us in.”

 

“Nah. You were both too stubborn to listen back then.”

 

Abby snickers. “You’re absolutely right.”

 

“But seriously, the way he  _ always _ looked at you, even when he was with someone else? That  _ look  _ always made me think ‘what are you waiting for, you big fucking oaf’?”

 

Abby smirks. “It wasn’t just him.”

 

“I know. Remember the Christmas party at my place right after he came back from Africa?”

 

Of course she remembers. “Yeah.”

 

“I thought for sure it was going to happen that night. I even said something to Chuck.”

 

“Seriously?”

 

Susan rolls her eyes. “Abby, the two of you spent the entire night talking to each other and dancing together. And you kept disappearing outside together. I wasn’t the only one who thought it either. Chen said something too.”

 

“We went outside to smoke.”

 

Susan chuckles. “I know. But you both had basically the same look you have now. Happy.”

 

Abby shrugs. “He hooked up with Sam a few weeks later.”

 

“Yeah. What was he thinking?” She grins when Abby snorts. “But I still always knew it would be you two in the end. When you called and told me you were pregnant, I thought,  _ finally.  _ You’re like...the definition of soulmates.”

 

“That’s a nice thought.” Abby smiles wide. “I’m happier with him than I’ve ever been in my entire life. He…” She fumbles a little. “He’s Luka. With all off his idiot qualities, he’s such an amazing man. I’m so lucky.”

 

Susan bumps her with her shoulder. “I’d say you both are.” She gets to her feet. “We should probably go down and check on them. Who knows what kind of trouble they’ll get into.”

 

Abby rises with her and heads for the door.  “Luka already has  _ plans  _ for a boys night. I don’t even want to know.”

 

Susan giggles. “Really?”

 

“Yeah, I told him I wanted to hang with just you one of the nights, and he was all over it.” She snickers. “Who knows? But it will get them out of our hair for awhile.”

 

They find the guys in the living room. Cosmo and Joe were bonding over Joe’s action figures. 

 

“Hopefully there won’t be any arguments over who gets to play with what. We’re still working on sharing. And apologies in advance if Cosmo goes home swearing in Croatian. Some people think it’s funny.” Her voice carries over to the couch where Luka and Chuck are sitting, Luka looks over with a grin.

 

“Hey, at least he stopped swearing in English. Like anyone is going to know what he’s saying in Croatian.” He shrugs. 

 

Abby rolls her eyes and sits on the arm of the couch next to him. “ _ I  _ know, Luka, and I don’t appreciate being sworn at by my two year old.”

 

Susan laughs and shakes her head. This week was going to be fun. 

  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  



	27. Chapter 27

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Because every fic needs a domme named Kate. ❤️😁

__

“So, this is the  _ actual  _ bar.” Chuck looks around in awe.

 

Abby laughs. “Where they shot the exteriors, yeah.”

 

“This is beyond cool.” 

 

Susan snickers. “He’s easily impressed. But actually...so am I. Nice job, guys.”

 

Luka smiles and shakes his head. “It was Abby’s idea. I wouldn’t have thought of it.”

 

“That’s because you’re a foreigner and don’t know American TV.” Abby smirks at him.

 

He scowls at her. “I’ve lived here more than fifteen years. I’m a citizen.” 

 

She leans over to kiss him. “You’ll always be a foreigner Kovac. Deal with it.”

 

Luka rolls his eyes and pinches her. “I know what ‘Cheers’ is.”

 

“Until you’ve watched every John Hughes movie  _ and  _ seen ‘Die Hard’, you don’t get to claim American status. I don’t care if you’re a citizen. How is that not on the test?” Abby teases him.

 

Susan goggles. “You’ve never seen ‘Die Hard’?”

 

Luka sighs heavily. “No. Shut up.”

 

Chuck shakes his head. “That’s pretty un-American, man. But I disagree on the Hughes flicks.”

 

Abby snickers. “No. That’s my line. He  _ will  _ watch ‘Breakfast Club’ with me one day.”

 

“Dude. ‘Breakfast Club’ is a classic. And  _ definitely  _  ‘Ferris Bueller’. But c’mon. Why are ‘Pretty In Pink’ or any of the ‘Home Alone’ sequels required viewing?”

 

Abby sits back and laughs as their food is served. “Fine. We can let  _ some _ of the John Hughes library slide. But I’m firm on a lot of it.”

 

Luka shrugs and grins. “We’ll get to it one of these days.” He smirks at his wife. “Want an onion ring? These are pretty American, yeah?”

 

Susan laughs when Abby sticks her tongue out at him. “He’s got you there. We all know you won’t touch those.”

 

“You’re damn right. I hope you have gum. I don't want you breathing those on me the rest of the night.”

 

Luka grins slyly and leans in to kiss her. She presses her palm on his face to move it away, making him laugh. “Fine. Stop calling me a foreigner.” He smiles at Susan. “So what’s this story about your double date?”

 

“Oh.” Susan laughs. “Well, one of my friends from work, Kate, is a domme. We had dinner with her and one of her….subordinates.”

 

Luka looks confused. “What’s a domme?”

 

Abby snickers. “Foreigner. Dominatrix? You know, like…”

 

“I get it.” Luka cuts her off, blushing. “You didn’t have to do another seminar did you?”

 

Susan snorts. “I thought of that whole thing when she told me. God, what a day  _ that  _ was.”

 

Chuck looks blank. “What day?”

 

Abby giggles. “You never told him about that? Jesus, Susan.”

 

Susan shrugs. “It never really came up. The three of us, and Carter and Gallant, had to take a sexual harassment seminar after we treated a dominatrix.”

 

“Why?” Chuck looks fascinated now.

 

Luka shakes his head. “Because Susan and Abby are pervs and the rest of us just happened to be there.”

 

Abby pokes him. “Oh, shut up. You and Carter were right in the middle of it. The only innocent one was Michael.”

 

“You two started it.”

 

“Carter put the dildo in Weaver’s locker.” Susan points out.

 

Luka laughs. “He did?”

 

“Yeah. He told me right after we left.” Susan shakes her head. “It was actually a fun day, wasn’t it? Carter and Luka dueling over Abby. While I was dating Carter.”

 

Abby rolls her eyes. “It was more about the stupid dick-measuring contest they had going for about two years.”

 

Luka frowns at her. “I still don’t know what that means.”

 

Susan breaks into a hysterical fit of giggles. “Jesus, Luka. I didn’t realize how much I missed  _ you;  _ not just Abby.” She catches her breath. “Don’t worry about it. And I won’t ask Abby who wins that contest.” She wiggles her eyebrows at him. 

 

Luka chokes on his water while Abby grins smugly. 

 

“Anyways, back to Kate. She’s actually pretty amazing. She’s head of ICU. She does this on the side to blow off steam.” Susan shrugs. “I can’t blame her. But the date was interesting. The guy was actually her boyfriend at the time, but they had the same dynamic she has with clients. She kept telling him what he could and couldn’t eat or drink.” Susan shakes her head. “I caught on pretty quickly, but Chuck was completely confused.” 

 

He laughs. “I had no idea what was going on. All I could think was ‘Dude, if you want the burger, get the burger.’ She made him order chicken. And eat it a certain way.”

 

Abby shakes her head. “Wow. That must have been...weird.”

 

Susan smiles. “Yeah. She told me the next day what the deal was. She broke up with him because she wanted a normal relationship, which is how that one started. They fell into that when he realized what she does. I gotta say, she leads an interesting life.”

 

“Hmmm.” Luka eyes Abby. “Interesting.”

 

She snickers. “No.”

 

He shrugs. “Fine.”

 

Susan laughs again. “He calls us pervs.”

 

Abby rolls her eyes. “You have no idea.”

 

Susan giggles. “Oh, I’ve got a pretty good one. Considering…”

 

Luka casts his eyes to the ceiling and looks put upon. “Am I  _ ever _ going to live that down with you? I’m married to your best friend now, remember?”

 

She laughs. “I know. That’s why it’s so fun to tease you about it.” 

 

“I thought we were even on that anyways.” Luka lifts a brow.

 

“Listen, Kovač. Mine was my husband. Yours was a patient’s mother. Definitely  _ not  _ even.” Susan narrows her eyes at him.

 

Chuck interrupts. “Woah, wait. Are you talking about…?”

 

Luka laughs. “Yes. And I still say we’re even.” 

 

Abby snickers. “Am I the only one of us who  _ never _ had sex in that hospital?”

 

Susan snorts. “Liar.”

 

“Oh. Right. That doesn’t count. We weren’t open.” She shrugs.

 

“Must not have been very memorable.” Luka grins when Abby rolls her eyes. He runs his hand over her shoulder. “I would have had sex with you in the hospital. Why didn’t we?”

 

Abby laughs. “I have no idea.”

 

Susan snickers. “Anyways. Enough sex talk.”

 

“Why?” Chuck wiggles his eyebrows at her. 

 

“Because.” She nudges him and grins. “How’s Neela, anyways. Since Gallant came up?”

 

Abby smiles. “She seems to be doing great. She’s almost done with her residency.”

 

“Is she going to stay at County?”

 

“No idea. Probably not. You know what an over-achiever she is.” Abby shrugs. 

 

“How’s her love life?”

 

Luka snorts and Abby shoves his arm. “She’s dating Anspaugh’s nephew. He’s kind of a dick.”

 

Susan shakes her head. “What about Ray?”

 

Abby sighs. “They’re madly in love with each other and won’t admit it. They talk at least twice a week.”

 

“What is it about County General that has madly in love people never admitting it?” Susan raises her brows. 

 

Luka snickers. “That’s exactly what I said.”

 

Susan reaches over and pokes him. “You’d better not be giving your wife a hard time about that. You’re the one who pined for  _ her  _ for  _ years. _ It’s why you were boffing people in radiology.” 

 

Luka sends a soft smile in Abby’s direction. “That’s true. We were pretty stupid, huh?”

 

Susan grins at the smitten puppy look on Luka’s face. “Yes, you were. I told Abby yesterday that I always knew you two would end up together. It’s nice to be right.”

 

*****************************

 

They come home to find the boys snuggled on the couch with Katie, watching TV. 

 

“Alright, tiny ones. Time for bed.” Luka grins at them. 

 

“They wouldn’t go down. Sorry.” Katie gives them all an apologetic look. 

 

Susan laughs. “I’m not surprised. No big deal.” She scoops Cosmo up. “It’s time for bed, my man.”

 

Cosmo shrugs. Joe doesn’t go as quietly when Abby leans over to pick him up. “Katie stay, mama.” He scowls at her.

 

Abby kisses his head. “Katie will be back soon enough. Thanks.” She smiles at the babysitter and carries him off.

 

“You’re definitely his favorite.” Luka smiles at her. “Were they good?”

 

Katie gets her coat. “Yeah. They just didn’t want to go to bed. I don’t even know how many rounds of Go Fish we played.” She shrugs.

 

“Sorry.” Luka pulls out double the amount that they usually pay her. Chuck pulls his wallet out too, and Luka waves it away. “You paid for dinner. We’ll take care of this.”

 

Katie looks down at the wad of cash in her hand. “Wow! Thanks, doctor Kovač. I didn’t expect you to pay me extra.”

 

Luka shrugs. “Extra kid, extra pay.” He nods when the headlights flash in the window. “Is this your ride?”

 

She peeks out. “Yeah. That’s my dad. Thanks again. Cosmo is really sweet, mister Martin.” Katie smiles at him.

 

“Ah, so you needed another hour to get to know him.” He smiles at her snicker. “Thanks.”

 

Luka and Chuck start up the stairs. “The guest room is comfortable?”

 

“Yeah, just like home.” Chuck grins. “Look, I know I don’t know you guys as well as Suze, but I just want to say it makes her so happy to be here, so I’m glad too.”

 

Luka taps his arm. “Well, we’ll have to change the fact that you don’t know us as well, huh? Abby wants to hang with Susan. I’ve got some ideas for a guys night.”

 

“Strippers and cigars?”

 

Luka grins. “More child friendly than that, sorry.”

 

Chuck shrugs. “I’ve never seen why strippers aren’t child friendly, but fair enough.” He turns at the guest room. “Night.”

 

“Night.” Luka shakes his head and heads to the bedroom. He finds Abby at her dresser, taking off her jewelry. He steps behind her and wraps his arms around her waist. “Did he go to sleep?”

 

Abby turns in his arms and kisses him. “Yeah. He wanted to battle, but he went under in the end.”

 

Luka pulls her hair up, and reaches around to unclasp her necklace. She raises a brow. “Don’t get any ideas. We’ve got houseguests.”

 

Luka shrugs and smiles. “I know. Just helping you out.”

 

She steps away, and opens her dresser drawer for PJ’s. “Put pajamas on for God’s sake. Or  _ I  _ might get ideas.”

 

Luka snickers and goes to his own dresser. “I didn’t know Susan had us figured out all this time.”

 

Abby climbs into bed while he changes. “Me either.” She smiles at him. “She said she knew because of the way you always looked at me.”

 

Luka slides into bed and draws her over so she’s snuggled against him. “You’re easy to look at.”

 

Abby strokes his hair. “Back at you.” She tips her head up to kiss him. “Both of us were idiots for not noticing earlier.”

 

He sighs. “We really were. I love you, Abby.”

 

She smiles as her eyes droop with sleep. “I love you, too.”

  
  
  



	28. Chapter 28

“No pop.” Abby strips out of her work clothes to change for her night out with Susan.

 

Luka shrugs as he pulls on jeans. “Okay.”

 

“I mean it. You give him all of that sugar…”

 

Luka steps to her and tugs her ponytail. “Abby. Shut up.”

 

She sighs and pulls her jeans over her hips. “Sorry.”

 

He chuckles and kisses her. “We’ll be fine. Pizza and the arcade. Don’t worry.”

 

Abby pulls a black cashmere v-neck out of her drawer and tugs it over her head. “I know. It’s just…”

 

“I  _ know _ .” He smiles at her while he zips up his jacket. “We’ll look both ways before we cross the street, we won’t run with scissors, and I promise not to let Joe smoke too much.”

 

“Ha ha. I bet you think that’s funny.” She narrows her eyes at him.

 

Luka snickers. “It  _ is _ funny.”

 

Abby laughs. “Okay, it is. Just don’t get them too wound up, okay?”

 

He rolls his eyes. “We’re going to an arcade. One with Go-Karts. It’s paradise for boys. Of course they’ll get wound up.”

 

She sighs. “Fine. Then you’re dealing with bedtime.”

 

“Deal.” Luka kisses her again and heads out. 

 

Abby finishes getting ready and moves down the hall to get Susan. 

 

“The guys just left.” Susan tells her.

 

“I know. You ready?”

 

“Luka said you lectured him not to run with scissors.” Susan giggles as they walk down the stairs.

 

Abby rolls her eyes and picks up her keys. “He’s a big kid himself.”

 

Susan snickers. Over-protective mom is a side she’d  _ never  _ expected to see of Abby. She kind of loved it. “They’ll be fine. Where are we going?”

 

“I have a couple of places in mind. Would you rather have sushi, Italian, or a burger?”

 

Susan climbs in the car and ponders while Abby gets behind the wheel. “Sushi.”

 

Abby grins at her. “I was hoping you’d say that. Luka hates it.”

 

“He doesn’t know what he’s missing.” 

 

“I know.” Abby laughs. “So what did you guys do today?”

 

“We went downtown and wandered around some of the historical sites. It was freaking freezing.”

 

“Susan, how long did you live in Chicago? Boston is basically the same weather.”

 

“I know.” She grins. “It was fine. We were in and out of a lot of places. The boys were all bundled up and warm.”

 

“Thanks for taking Joe.”

 

“He’s a doll, Abby. Seriously.”

 

Abby shakes her head and pulls into the lot of the sushi restaurant. “I know it. I have no idea where he gets his sweet nature from.”

 

Susan giggles and climbs out of the car. “Luka.”

 

Abby laughs and shrugs. “Yeah. He’s got both of our tempers though. It’s a little scary.”

 

They slide into a booth and order drinks. “Cosmo has my temper. Chuck really doesn’t have much of one.” Susan shakes her head. “It’s a little weird.”

 

Abby picks up the menu and peruses. “You guys are good?”

 

Susan nods. “Yeah. Really good. I never expected to end up with someone like him, but I’m so glad I did.”

 

Abby snickers. “I hear that.”

 

They place their orders when the waiter arrives. “So how was having Carter here? Really.”

 

“It was fine. He hadn’t met Joe yet, and he called and said he was coming home and wanted to see us first.” Abby shrugs and takes a sip of her Diet Coke. “All of that is in the past. He and Luka are tight now.”

 

“Right. The Congo bromance.” Susan shakes her head. “Who would have thought the two of them would end up being friends?”

 

Abby laughs. “Not me, but they are. It’s pretty great.”

 

Susan grins and wiggles her eyebrows at her. “So are you going to answer the question about who wins that contest?”

 

Abby raises her eyebrows while their food is served. She smirks when the waiter walks away. “You’re a physician, Doctor Lewis. You should know that the whole ‘hands/feet/dick’ correlation is  _ not  _ a myth. You can probably figure it out from there.” 

 

Susan snickers. “Enough said.” She picks up her chopsticks and takes a piece of Dragon Roll. “Hey, I heard from Chen.”

 

“Really?” Abby looks surprised. “She’s back from China?”

 

“Yeah. She’s actually in LA. She took a job at the Children’s Hospital there.”

 

Abby smiles. “Well, good for her. How is she?”

 

Susan shrugs. “Okay, I guess. I think what happened with her dad really changed her. She seemed a little reserved.”

 

Abby nods. “Did you tell her about Greg?”

 

“She already knew. She sent flowers to Chaz.”

 

Abby smiles a little. “I was going to try to call her, but I didn’t know what to say. And I was already dealing with my own bullshit over it. Luka was pretty torn up.”

 

“Funny. There’s hardly anyone left at County from our time there.”

 

“Chuny and Haleh are still around. Morris, Neela, Sam. Malik, Frank and Jerry.” Abby ticks them off on her fingers. 

 

Susan laughs. “Okay. But you know what I mean.”

 

“Yeah.” Abby grins. “So. How is Iowa, really?”

 

“Boring as hell. But it’s a great hospital. I’ve got tenure, and that’s what I’ve always wanted. Chuck is working again now that Cosmo’s in school.”

 

Abby lifts a brow. “Doing the flight nurse thing?”

 

“Yeah. He thought about just going back to bedside, but it’s not his thing.” She shrugs. “I worry about him, but I think so many years at County kind of desensitized me to too much worry.”

 

Abby snickers. “Try to convince Luka that he needs to try that philosophy.”

 

“He’s always been that way.” 

 

Abby sighs. “Yeah. What happened last year...well, I think it brought up all of this fear of losing things again.” She’s quiet for a moment. “I hate that I did that to him.”

 

“Abby. You fucked up. Part of being married is fixing our fuck-ups.” Susan shrugs. “And he fucked up too.”

 

Abby waves her hand. “I know. Anyways. I’m not getting all deep and philosophical tonight.”

 

Susan raises a brow. “No? I thought that was patented Abby?” She snickers.

 

“Bite me.” Abby laughs. “I  _ will  _ say that going through all of this has done wonders for our sex life.”

 

“Oh, really?” Susan signals the waiter. “I need more wine.”

 

Abby grins at her. “I mean, we’re basically newlyweds when you think about it. And Luka has the libido of a teenager.”

 

Susan snorts. “Tell me something I don’t know.”

 

“Yeah, well.” She shrugs. “It’s kind of nice, that’s all.”

 

“I bet. I may never have had that crush on Luka, but anybody with eyes can see you’re pretty fucking lucky in that area.”

 

Abby smirks. “I am indeed. So how do you feel about creme brûlée?”

 

“That was a weird segue.” Susan giggles. “I feel quite good about it. Why?”

 

“I know a place that has the  _ best  _ desserts. What do you say we pay this check and hit that joint too?”

 

“I say that’s an excellent idea.”

 

*************************************************

 

Abby crawls into bed beside an already sleeping Luka. She’s stuffed and exhausted, but the night out had been exactly what she’d needed. She snuggles up to Luka’s back and drapes her arm across his waist.

 

The shift of the bed and the feel of Abby’s arm over him pulls Luka out of his light slumber. He rolls to his back and pulls her closer. “Hey.”

 

“Hi. Did you guys have fun?” She brushes the hair back from his forehead. 

 

“Joe only smoked a half a pack. I wouldn’t let him try the cigars. And we left them in the car at the strip club.”

 

Abby yawns and grins. “That was stupid. They might have gotten you free lap dances.”

 

Luka chuckles. “What were we thinking?”

 

Abby tilts her head up. “Jerk.” She presses her lips to his. 

 

He shifts so they’re nose to nose. “We ate pizza and played video games and drove go-karts. Of course we had fun. Did you?”

 

“Yeah. We had sushi and creme brûlée.”

 

Luka raises a brow. “And talked about men and hair and fashion?”

 

She giggles. “We didn’t get to hair and fashion. But men were definitely a topic.”

 

He strokes a hand over her hair, already drifting again. “I hope it was flattering.”

 

Abby shifts closer to him and trails a finger over his shoulder. “I may have answered the burning question of the size of your…”

 

Luka’s eyes pop wide. “No you didn’t.”

 

She starts laughing so hard she has to roll to her back to catch her breath. “Okay. I  _ implied  _ it. I didn’t give her measurements for Christ’s sake, Luka.”

 

He rolls to his own back and covers his face with his hand. “Oh my God. Women really  _ do  _ tell each other every damn thing.”

 

“Oh yeah. We absolutely do.” She props herself up on her elbow to look down at his blushing face. “You’re so cute when you’re embarrassed.” Abby grins down at him.

 

Luka moves his hand to glare at her. “I’m not embarrassed. I’m horrified.”

 

She snorts and leans down to press a kiss to his scowling lips. “Liar. You’re kind of proud of it.” Abby slides her hand down his body to find him, feeling him stir. “I promise, I was generous.”

 

He cocks a brow. “Oh really? Did you need to be?” Luka’s embarrassment is fading and being replaced by amusement and desire. He closes his eyes and covers her busy hand with his and arches up into her touch. 

 

“Mmm. Not really. I simply pointed out that the hand and feet thing isn’t  _ really  _ a myth, and as physicians, we all know this.” Abby smiles and rolls to straddle him. 

 

Luka cracks one eye open and grins up at her. “Are you saying I have big feet?”

 

She pulls her T-shirt over her head and takes his hands, sliding them up her body to cover her breasts. “Mmm hmm. Big hands too.” Abby closes her eyes and lets the sensation of those hands on her body wash over her. 

 

Luka watches her face as his thumbs stroke over her nipples and his fingers cup her. He slides those hands down her belly and around to grip her butt. He smiles and murmurs, “Imaš lijepo guzu…”

 

Abby’s eyes open and she grins at him, amused. She leans down to take his mouth with hers. “You think I don’t understand half of what you say in Croatian. But you’re wrong.”

 

Luka chuckles against her mouth. “Do you have a problem with me telling you that you have a great ass?” He rolls her under him. 

 

“No. I’m just saying I understand more than you think, so watch it.” She smiles prettily at him and yanks his shirt over his head. “But you were saying?”

 

Luka smiles softly and lowers his mouth to her throat. “Draga.” He murmurs against her skin.  _ My darling. _ He shifts to kiss his way lower and shivers when Abby’s breath hitches and her fingers tighten in his hair. “Srce…”  _ My heart. _ He lays his lips above her heart and slides the pajamas down her hips. 

 

Abby’s lips curve and her heart stutters. She knows well what his words mean, and hearing them in his native tongue makes her melt into the mattress. She lifts his face and guides him back up her body. “You’re beautiful, Luka.”

 

He drops his forehead to hers and slips slowly inside her. Strong and deep, he begins to move. A slow and silky rhythm that savors the beauty of the moment. 

 

Abby finds his lips with hers and slides her tongue against his. She wraps her arms and legs around him, bringing him as close as humanly possible. 

 

She groans into his mouth as he quickens the pace and she matches him beat for beat. Her head falls back against the pillow as the orgasm washes through her. She feels Luka follow and groan as he comes. 

 

Luka strokes her hair and smiles after rolling to his side so he doesn’t crush her. “I thought I wasn’t ‘getting any’, as you so charmingly put it, this week.”

 

Abby kisses his shoulder and smirks. “I couldn’t help myself. And I wanted to assuage any embarrassment.”

 

He’s so relaxed he couldn’t be embarrassed if he tried. “Thanks for that.”

 

“Anytime.” She grins mischievously. “Just don’t forget to cover your feet in the morning.”

 

Luka rolls his eyes. “Just shut up.” He pinches her. “Go to sleep.”

 

“Okay.” Abby smiles and closes her eyes. 

  
  
  
  
  
  
  



	29. Chapter 29

“New Year's Resolutions.” Susan points at Abby. It’s a little before eleven, and so far, Cosmo and Joe had managed to stay awake. Maybe they’d make it until the ball drop after all. 

 

“To  _ really _ quit smoking?” Luka teases her. 

 

“Shut up. You do it as much as I do.” Abby smirks at him.

 

“I thought you  _ had _ quit.” Susan narrows her eyes. 

 

Abby shrugs. “I started again in rehab. I quit again. I might just sneak one every now and then. And so does that jackass.” 

 

Luka chuckles. “Okay, okay. Point taken.”

 

“I don’t do resolutions. I know what I need to do to better myself, so why add pressure?” Abby shrugs. 

 

“You know? That’s very smart.” Susan smiles at her. “I’m still resolving to work out more.”

 

Luka reaches his hand over and takes Abby’s. “I’m resolving to teach Joe all of the Croatian pick-up lines that I can.”

 

“Please,  _ please _ do  _ not  _ teach him the one you used on me the other night.” Abby scowls at him.

 

Luka grins. “Too late.” He leans in to kiss her. “Lmas ijepe oči”.

 

Abby just sighs. “You think you can get around me with that one?”

 

“Yes.”

 

She rises to pour herself another Ginger Ale. “Okay, fine. You can. But let’s stay away from the really suggestive ones for a few years, huh?” She leans against the table. 

 

Susan sighs a little dreamily. “What did that mean?”

 

“Mama has pretty eyes.” Joe pipes up from the floor where he’s coloring with Cosmo.

 

Luka looks down at him in surprise. “Yes, that’s exactly right, buddy. Good job.” He runs his foot over Joe’s backside. 

 

“Tata love mama.” Joe says firmly. 

 

Abby looks at her son, then her husband, with a soft and goofy grin. “Mama loves Tata, too.”

 

Chuck shakes his head. “Maybe Cos and I need to learn another language if it makes the ladies melt like this.”

 

Abby laughs. “It’s definitely a bonus.”

 

“What did he use the other night?” Susan grins at her.

 

“He told me I had a great ass.” Abby rolls her eyes.

 

Luka shrugs. “What? It’s true.”

 

Chuck snickers. “Maybe you need to teach  _ me  _ some of these lines, man.”

 

“Izgubio sam svog plišanog medvjedića. Hoćeš li ti ići samnom u krevet?” Luka rattles off, smiling in amusement. 

 

Chuck just stares. “I think you should start with something easier.”

 

“What the hell does that one mean? I’m pretty sure there’s something…” Abby trails off, remembering him saying something like that years ago while teasing her into bed, but she hadn’t asked the meaning at the time, as she’d been distracted.

 

Luka snickers. “Quite possibly the cheesiest pick-up line in history.” He shakes his head, looking for the right translation. “Basically, it’s ‘I lost my teddy bear. You should come to bed with me instead.’”

 

Abby chokes on her drink while Susan collapses in a fit of giggles. Chuck snorts. “Dude. And here I thought the whole ‘Did you fall from Heaven?’ thing was the worst line ever. But no. That one takes the cake.”

 

Luka laughs. “I happen to agree. It’s really terrible.” He rises to make himself a plate of the snack food they had for the occasion. “Croatian isn’t exactly a love language.”

 

“I dated a guy who spoke Italian once. He could make anything sound sexy.” Susan grins at Chuck. 

 

“Maybe I need to look into Rosetta Stone.” Chuck smirks at her.

 

She shrugs. “I wouldn’t be opposed to that.”

 

“Luka speaks French, too.” Abby smiles at him.

 

“You do? I didn’t know that.” Susan goggles at him.

 

Luka shrugs. “A little. Enough to get by. It came in handy in the Congo.”

 

“For picking up nurses.” 

 

Luka leans against the table next to his wife and pokes her in the belly for the comment. “For communication with the patients.”

 

Abby snorts. “Sure.”

 

“Any idea whatever happened to Gillian?” Susan asks him.

 

He shakes his head. “We lost contact after I told her I wanted to be with Sam.” Luka rolls his eyes and shrugs. “I still feel kind of bad about that. Gillian was great.”

 

Susan snickers. “Bad about what? Dumping her for Sam? Or being with Sam in general?”

 

Luka casts his gaze to the ceiling. “Did  _ anyone  _ like Sam?” 

 

Susan glances at Abby, who just shrugs. “Well, you did. And we like you. So there you go.”

 

He just smirks. “Okay then. Good to know.” He bites into a carrot. “It’s almost midnight.” Luka sets his plate down and puts his arms around Abby. “Are you going to kiss me?”

 

She links her arms around his waist. “Maybe. But we have ten minutes yet.” 

 

“Hmmm. We should dance then.” He lowers his lips to her forehead. “It’s tradition.” Luka starts moving with her to the tunes coming from Times Square on the TV. 

 

Susan sighs watching her two friends, who she loved dearly, having a private moment in the midst of their little party. It had been amazing watching how in tune they were with each other during this visit. She smiles at Chuck. “Maybe we should dance too.”

 

Chuck grins and scoops her into his arms, giving her a twirl. “Can’t let the foreigner show me up twice in one night.”

 

Luka smiles and laughs at them over Abby’s head. The two boys watch their parents dance, clearly wondering if they’d all lost their minds. Joe pops up and runs to attach himself to Luka’s leg. He bends to scoop Joe up so the three of them are dancing together. When the countdown gets to one, Luka presses a kiss to Joe’s forehead. At the shouts of “Happy New Year” from the television, he lowers his mouth to Abby’s. He kisses her deep and slow. “Stretna Nova Godina.” Luka murmurs against her mouth.

 

Abby smiles. “Happy 2009.” She pulls back to look into his smiling eyes. “Let’s make this year the best one yet, huh?” 

 

*******************************************

 

“All good things, huh?” Susan hugs Abby outside the gate at the airport.

 

“I’m so glad you came. I’ve missed you so damn much.”

 

“I really hope you guys can make it in May.” Susan turns to hug Luka and kiss Joe.

 

“It’s on the agenda.” Luka smiles down at her. “I think we’re going to make it a stop on our way to Hawaii.”

 

“That’s news to me, but I’ll take it.” Abby laughs. “It will be nice to see everyone.” She turns to hug Chuck when he joins them. “Take good care of my girl.”

 

“You got it.” Chuck shakes Luka’s hand and gives Joe a high five. “We’ll see you guys soon, then.”

 

Luka smiles. “Not soon enough. Have a safe flight.”

 

Abby gives her friend one last hug and watches them head towards security. She sighs and slides her arm around Luka’s waist. “It was so great having them here.”

 

He drops a kiss on the top of her head. “It really was.” 

 

“But I’m happy to be back to just the three of us.” She grins up at him.

 

Luka chuckles. “Me too.” He dips his head and gives her a quick kiss. “Let’s go home and be alone for awhile.”

  
  



	30. Chapter 30

“So your friends got off okay?” Michaels hands Abby a cup of coffee at the table she’s charting on.

 

“Yeah. They left early Sunday.”

 

“I liked her. Thanks for asking me to lunch with you.”

 

“I’m glad you came. I think she wanted to make sure I’m  _ really _ making friends here.” Abby smirks.

 

Dawn laughs. “Does she want a job?”

 

Abby sighs. “Unless you have a tenure track position, probably not.”

 

“Well damn. No, we don’t. That’s too bad. We could use someone with her energy and experience. It’s too bad that husband of yours decided he didn’t want to work with you.” She grins.

 

Abby snickers. “It was more that I didn’t want to work with him.” She waves a hand. “Not really. It’s just how things worked out. This is working well for us. We’ve always had a superior/subordinate dynamic at work.” She smiles a little. “It wouldn’t be wrong to say he was a mentor for me. I don’t know how we would have handled having equal status.” Abby shrugs. 

 

Dawn narrows her eyes. “What do you mean by that?”

 

Abby’s eyes pop wide and she laughs. “Oh my God. No. I don’t mean to imply that Luka’s sexist or something. He’s the farthest thing from it. And we certainly don’t have that dynamic at home. Equal partners there. Other than the fact that he can cook and I can’t.” She relaxes when Dawn snickers at that. “I just mean that we worked together for seven years with him as my supervisor, and it would be weird to try and get used to a different dynamic. That’s all.”

 

Michaels nods. “I can see that. It makes good sense for you to want to work without him as a safety net.”

 

Abby points at her. “That’s exactly it.”

 

“So you never did tell me what you got him for Christmas.”

 

“Oh.” Abby smiles. “I got him flight and hotel vouchers for us for Hawaii.”

 

Dawn raises an eyebrow. “Nice.”

 

“We were supposed to go right after we got married. He had to go home to Croatia to take care of his father instead.” Abby shrugs. “It’s time for us to take a honeymoon, that’s all.”

 

“That’s really sweet.” Dawn rises and tosses her empty cup in the trash. “I’m off in a bit. See you tomorrow.”

 

Abby waves a hand at her and continues her chart. She curses when her phone buzzes in her pocket. “What?” She answers.

 

“Well hello to you too.” Luka chuckles.

 

“Sorry. I’m in the middle of catching up on my charts.”

 

Luka sighs. “You still don’t chart as you go?”

 

“Shut up.” Abby smiles. “How are you Luka? Fine day isn’t it?”

 

“That’s better. Smartass. Just wanted to let you know I’m on my way out. I’ll get Joe.”

 

“Okay. I’ll be home in a few hours. I have that appointment.”

 

“I know. Enjoy. What do you say to popcorn, a movie, and necking on the couch when you get home?”

 

“That sounds divine.” She waits a beat. “How do you even know what necking means?”

 

Luka laughs. “I’m full of surprises?”

 

Abby smiles. “Yeah, you are. I’ll see you at home.”

 

An hour later Abby takes her usual seat in Anders office.

 

“So how were your holidays?” Anders smiles at Abby.

 

“They were good. Some friends came to visit. It was great to see them. And I got my one year chip on Christmas Day.”

 

“That’s wonderful. How do you feel about that?”

 

Abby sighs. “I feel great about it. But this isn’t the first time that I’ve had a year. I can’t forget that it’s going to keep taking hard work.”

 

“How is Luka handling it?” Anders asks.

 

“He’s been….amazing. Truly.” Abby smiles a little. “It’s taken him a lot of years to get here, but I’m glad he has. He kind of blew it off before, you know?”

 

She shakes her head when Anders nods. “He never really saw me in active addiction before. He saw me drink, but I never got drunk around him.” Abby rolls her eyes. “It was one of the things that he butted heads with Carter over.” She smirks. “It was one of the rare times Carter was right.”

 

Anders chuckles at that. “But it’s different now?”

 

Abby nods. “Yeah. He read a bunch of books while I was in rehab. I know he talked to my sponsor a couple of times too. Trying to figure things out. Something must have clicked because he gets it. It’s a gift.”

 

“Does he go to Al-Anon?” Anders asks.

 

Abby barely controls a snort. “No. I haven’t pushed him there. Luka’s not the type to go to meetings.” She shrugs. “If things change, I might go there, but for now, we’re okay. He stopped drinking too.” Abby says in wonder.

 

“Does that surprise you?”

 

“Yes and no. Luka’s not the type to half-ass anything. Once he decided he was going to help with this, he went all in. He doesn’t even order a beer when we’re out with friends.”

 

“Did you expect that of him? For him to quit too?”

 

Abby shakes her head vehemently. “Absolutely not.” She sighs. “I bitched at him for it one night when  _ I  _ was drunk. But I apologized and made amends for that along with everything else. I’ve never been that alcoholic that expects everyone else to quit drinking just because I can’t.”

 

Anders smiles. “Alright then. It sounds like you two have this part worked through pretty well.”

 

Abby nods. “Yeah. I’m still working on dealing with some of the shame from what I did while I was drinking, but I’m getting there.”

 

“Do you want to talk about that?”

 

“Not this time, really.”

 

Anders shifts her legs and nods. “Okay. I’d actually like to talk about something else.”

 

“What?”

 

“Your first marriage.” She grins when Abby scrunches up her face in a scowl. “Exactly. Which is why I want to talk about it. How much have you told Luka about that time?”

 

Abby sighs. “Barely anything. It’s just...not important.”

 

Anders shakes her head. “I disagree. Everything we do shapes us. You married this man, so you must have had a good reason to.”

 

“It wasn’t a good reason. I got married because it was what was expected. Richard was charming and sweet, and wonderful. At first. But in reality he was a manipulative asshole who used me as arm candy and a punching bag for his moods.” Abby shrugs. 

 

“Did he abuse you physically?”

 

“No. But he destroyed my self-esteem, made me doubt everything about myself. He cheated on me, more than once. He belittled me in public and in private. He tried to make me believe that I was nothing without him. I coped with that by drinking too much.”

 

“So you left?”

 

“I started going to meetings and I realized fairly quickly that our relationship was toxic and that I couldn’t stay in it. So yeah. I left. The divorce agreement stipulated that he would help me pay for Med school in lieu of alimony. He reneged on that.”

 

“Did you go after him legally?”

 

Abby sighs. “No. I didn’t see the point. He could afford better lawyers than I could.”

 

Anders nods. “How did you end up paying?”

 

Abby laughs and shakes her head. “One more thing to thank Carter for. Luka actually offered to help me out, but I wouldn’t let him. I finally strong-armed Richard into co-signing a loan for me. I had some trouble keeping up on the payments, even working doubles as a nurse, and then I found out that Carter had paid the whole shot so I could stop taking so many shifts and focus on school.” She smiles. “He won’t let me pay any of it back.”

 

Anders stares. “This Carter sounds like a saint.”

 

Abby smiles. “No. He’s definitely not a saint. But he’s a really good friend who happens to be loaded. Luka and I have both tried, several times, to give him the money. He won’t take it. So his center that’s opening in a few months is getting a substantial donation from the Lockhart-Kovačs.”

 

“That’s an excellent way to pay him back.” Anders smiles.

 

Abby smiles. “We thought so.”

 

“This might be a silly question, but is Lockhart your maiden name?”

 

Abby rolls her eyes. “No. It’s Richard’s. I never went back because my nursing license and all of my Med school transcripts were in that name. Also, my maiden name was Wyczenski.”

 

“Ah.” Anders laughs.

 

“Yeah. Honestly, it’s been  _ my  _ name for so long that I don’t consider it his anymore. Luka and I talked about my switching to Kovač.”

 

“Did you?”

 

“He very plainly told me to shut the fuck up. I could do what I wanted to do, but it doesn’t matter one bit to him.” Abby puts on the accent. “‘ _ You’ve been Lockhart since I’ve known you. Why the hell would I expect you to change that now?’”  _ She smiles. “And all the other reasons still apply. It’s a hell of a lot of paperwork to change your name on all of your official documents when you’re almost forty.”

 

“True enough. I was just curious how you both felt about that.”

 

“We feel fine about it. It bugged me more than Luka, honestly. Maybe someday I’ll change it. If Joe has a problem with it or something.” Abby shrugs.

 

Anders smiles. “Why would he? It seems like both of his parents have solid reasoning.”

 

“Yeah. We do. I didn’t want to be one of those parents who hyphenates their kid’s name. He’s already got it tough with Kovač, and the formal spelling of his first name is Croatian too.”

 

“Is it?”

 

Abby smiles. “Yeah. It’s actually Luka’s father’s name. But I didn’t even realize it when I suggested ‘Joseph’. Once I did, we went with ‘Josip’ instead to honor that.”

 

“That’s beautiful.”

 

“It just is. I like it.” Abby shrugs.

 

“You should. Now, I think you should talk to Luka about how your first marriage affected you. He’s talking more about his, right?”

 

“His first marriage was happy.”

 

“And ended in tragedy.” Anders lifts a brow.

 

“Exactly. How can it even compare? Complaining about what an asshole my ex-husband was doesn’t seem fair when he’s still dealing with his entire family being killed in a bombing.”

 

Anders sighs. “Abby, it’s not about what’s fair. It’s not complaining when you have legitimate scars from that time.”

 

“Maybe. I’ll think about it.”

 

“Alright.” She nods, satisfied with that. “That’s our time. I’ll see you in a few weeks.”

 

************************************

 

Abby finds Luka in the kitchen, washing the dinner dishes. Joe is playing trucks on the floor and babbling happily to his father. She smiles when Luka answers him in Croatian. 

 

“Hey.” She sets her bag on the table and steps over for a hello kiss. “You guys ate I take it?”

 

Luka smiles at her. “We did. Now you can too.” He steps over to the oven and pulls out the bowl he’d had warming.

 

Abby laughs when she sees what’s in it. “Spaghetti-O’s?”

 

“With meatballs.” Luka grins and shrugs when she laughs again. “The chef decided to take a night off. This was easy.”

 

“No complaints here.” She sits at the table and digs in.

 

Luka shakes his head. “I didn’t think there would be.”

 

Abby licks her spoon and watches as he continues to wash up. “How was your day?”

 

“Fine. Pretty slow, actually. I left on time at least.” He finishes the dishes and sits with her. “How about yours?”

 

“It was okay. Dawn bitched a little that we didn’t want to work together.”

 

“What?” Luka frowns.

 

Abby smiles. “She’s always on the hunt for good docs. She said something about it being too bad we didn’t want to work together. I told her you were an ass to work with.” She grins at him.

 

“Ha ha. Did you tell her the real reason?”

 

“Yeah. She gets it.”

 

“Did you tell her that I always tried to teach you to chart as you go?” He raises his eyebrows at her.

 

“She does the same thing I do.” Abby laughs when he rolls his eyes. “Are you still up for popcorn and a movie?”

 

Luka grins. “And necking.” He wiggles his brows. 

 

Abby shakes her head and rises to put her bowl in the sink. “I’ll put the kid to bed, you set it up.”

 

“Deal.” He rises and kisses her forehead, and Joe’s when she scoops him up. “Good night, Joe.”

 

“Night, Tata.” Joe waves as Abby carries him out. 

 

When she comes back down, she finds Luka sitting on the couch with a bowl of popcorn in his lap and two Cokes on the coffee table. “High octane, huh?” She nods at the drinks and sits next to him, sliding over to snuggle against him when he lifts his arm and tugs her over.

 

“I keep telling you it’s better for you.”

 

Abby rolls her eyes. “It’s pop, Luka. It’s all bad for you. But fine. I’ll live dangerously.” She takes a handful of popcorn. “So what are we watching?”

 

Luka kisses the top of her head. “By request.” He pushes the buttons on the remote to start the movie.

 

Abby sighs and smiles when the opening for “The Breakfast Club” rolls on. “You just earned yourself more than necking.” She tilts her head back, turns his face to hers and takes his mouth in a slow, deep kiss. “After the movie.”

 

Luka grins and pulls her closer. “I can live with that.”

 


	31. Chapter 31

“Hey.” Gorsch walks into the lounge to find Luka taking a long hit of coffee midway through the day.

 

“Hey.” Luka scrubs a hand over his face.

 

“Long night?” Gorsch grins at him. “No offense, but you look beat.”

 

Luka smiles. “My own fault. Abby and I watched a couple of movies last night, and then...” He trails off, flushing as he realizes what he almost said. 

 

Gorsch snickers. “Yeah, I can fill in the blanks. Dirty movies?” He asks hopefully. 

 

Luka laughs. “No. A couple of movies from the eighties that are Abby’s favorites. I’d never seen them.”

 

Marcus lifts a brow. “You’ve never seen your wife’s favorite movies?”

 

“No. We tend to watch a lot of Disney.” Luka smirks. “So I began to fulfill my promise to watch a bunch of John Hughes flicks.” He shrugs. 

 

“Hughes, huh? Which ones?”

 

“ _ The Breakfast Club  _ and  _ Ferris Bueller _ . It’s apparently un-American that I’ve never seen them.”

 

“They’re classics, man. But you’re not American, so you should get a pass.” Gorsch grins as they head out to the desk together.

 

“According to my wife, my pass is up.” Luka smiles. “They were good, so I’m not complaining.”

 

Marcus snickers. “Obviously not if you got nookie afterward.”

 

Luka casts his eyes to the ceiling. “I can’t believe I almost told you that. I’m more tired than I thought.”

 

Daniels steps up. “Well, wake up. Double trauma coming in. Suit up.” He tosses gloves to Luka and Marcus and strides toward the ambulance bay. 

 

The traumas are a double GSW. A convenience store clerk who had managed to wrestle the gun away from the assailant after being shot himself. Luka sighs as he sends the clerk up to surgery but it didn’t look good. 

 

“How’d it go?” Daniels asks. 

 

“Bullet lodged in the left ventricle. A lot of blood loss. I’ll be surprised if he makes it.” Luka shakes his head. “The gunman?”

 

“Dead.” Daniels sighs. “Got him in the carotid.”

 

Luka nods. “Well that was a shitty couple of hours.”

 

“Yup. Hopefully that’s all the excitement we’ll get today.”

 

“Now you’ve jinxed us.” Luka gives him a pained smile.

 

Daniels shakes his head. “You’re right.”

 

Luka finishes the chart on his patient, smirking a little thinking of Abby. He looks over as Allie walks up. “Hey. Just coming on?”

 

She grins. “Yeah. I’m on all night. Why did I think overnights were a good idea?”

 

“The extra pay?” Luka laughs when she shrugs. “Abby used to work nights as often as she could because of that when she was a nurse.”

 

Allie’s brow furrows. “Your wife used to be a nurse?”

 

Luka nods. “Yeah. She got her nursing degree and worked for awhile before she went to Med school. She was actually a nurse when I met her and dated her for the first time.”

 

“The first time?” Allie looks confused.

 

Luka chuckles a little. “It’s a long story. Suffice it to say, I know very well what nurses go through.”

 

She smiles at him. “That’s good to know. Ah, do you think maybe I could talk to your wife sometime? I’ve been thinking about Med school myself, and I’m wondering about some things.”

 

Luka nods and grins. “Good for you. I’m sure she’d be happy to. I’ll check with her and let you know.”

 

“Thanks Doctor Kovač.” Allie says to him and walks to the lounge.

 

Luka rolls his eyes as he hears the dispatch that they had a multiple MVC coming in. “Jinxed us.” He mutters, and heads toward the bay.

 

*************************************

 

Luka drags himself into the house to find Abby picking up Joe’s toys and throwing them in their box. He kicks off his shoes and shrugs out of his coat, tossing it on the bannister. He feels like he’s been hit by a truck.

 

She smiles at him. “Hey. You look like shit.”

 

He collapses on the couch and closes his eyes. “That’s a popular opinion today.”

 

Abby walks to him and perches on the edge since he was stretched all the way across the couch. “Are you feeling okay?”

 

Luka cracks one eye open and looks at her while she smooths the hair from his forehead. “I’m fine. Just tired.” He catches her hand and kisses her palm. “Somebody kept me up late last night.”

 

Abby lifts a brow at him. “I didn’t hear any complaints.” She smiles when he smirks at her. “Rough day?”

 

“Yeah. Trauma hell. I felt like I was back at County.”

 

“Hmm. Did you eat?”

 

Luka smiles at her with closed eyes. “Yes. Unlike some of us, I understand that nutrition is important.”

 

He laughs when she pokes him in the ribs. “I understand it just fine. I don’t always care.”

 

Luka tugs her down for a kiss. “Fair enough.” He groans as he pushes himself up to sit. 

 

Abby frowns and rises, taking his hand and pulling him to his feet. “It’s time for bed.”

 

Luka wraps an arm around her waist and kisses the top of her head. “Are you taking care of me?”

 

“Yeah, so deal with it.” She steers him toward the stairs. “It’s not very often that you look so exhausted.”

 

“Abby, I’m fine.” He rolls his eyes. “In fact…” Luka stops at the top of the stairs and pushes her against the wall. He grins down at her before taking her mouth with his and kissing her brainless.

 

Abby chuckles when he finally pulls back. “You think that convinces me? You’ll probably try to get some when you’re ninety-six and on your deathbed.”

 

Luka shrugs and walks the rest of the way to the bedroom with her. “Be that as it may…”

 

“Quiet. Strip.” Abby guides him to the edge of the bed and points at him. 

 

He gives her a leer. “You’re being awfully demanding for someone who’s supposed to be taking care of me.”

 

“You’ve known me long enough to know my bedside manner when someone needs a boot in the ass.” She smirks when he drags off his tie and shrugs out of his shirt, keeping his eyes on hers the entire time. “Pants too.”

 

“Are you trying to seduce me?” Luka smirks as he unhooks his belt and the fly of his pants, letting them drop. 

 

Abby snorts. “No. On the bed, on your belly Kovac.”

 

“Can I take my socks off?”

 

“Yes. Then do as you’re told.” 

 

Luka chuckles as she stalks to the bathroom. He pulls the socks from his feet and slides onto the bed, sighing a little as his face hits the pillow. 

 

Abby comes back into the room to find him sprawled facedown on the mattress, wearing only his boxers. She had changed into a nightshirt for ease of movement. She forces herself to focus on the task at hand. Why the hell did she marry somebody so damned cute? She climbs onto the bed and straddles his waist.

 

The touch of her hands, slick with lotion, on his tight shoulders cause Luka to groan.

 

“Jesus, Luka. You’ve got rocks back here.” Abby scowls as she digs her strong fingers into the knots between his shoulder blades. She knows that’s where he tended to carry his stress, but geez.

 

Luka sighs and turns his head. “You stop that, and I’ll kill you.” His words are a bit slurred and his accent is thick.

 

Abby chuckles and leans forward to press a kiss to the back of his neck, right where she knows he likes to be touched. “Who’s being demanding now?” She murmurs. 

 

“Hey, you started it.” Luka sighs as her hands stroke and rub along his back, occasionally digging in and causing a flash of pain. He melts further into the bed even as desire for her causes him to grow hard and he groans. She’s taking over all of his senses, enchanting him.

 

Abby knows exactly what she’s doing to him. She honestly hadn’t had any ulterior motive when she had started this. He had looked tired and sad and stressed, and she had wanted to help. But years of knowing his body, and his responses to where she touched, had her seeking out all sorts of secrets that were only theirs. Abby slides down so she’s straddling his thighs and works her hands at his waist. Stroking along his firm obliques and glutes. She leans forward again and slides her tongue up his spine, causing him to shiver. She hears his strangled moan and smiles. 

 

“Turn over, Luka.” Her voice is husky.

 

He obliges her and grins when her eyes go to his erection. She shakes her head and straddles his thighs again, reaching over for more lotion. “Abby…”

 

“Shh. I’m not done taking care of you.” She leans forward and starts to massage his shoulders and chest and stomach. Moving her hands teasingly toward his waistband and away again. She pins his hands above his head when he tries to reach for her. “Just stay where I put you.”

 

Luka gives up on the hope of any sort of control and lets her take him over. He sighs when she presses kisses to his chest, down to his belly, and groans when she finally frees him and takes him into her mouth. 

 

Abby smiles when he tenses and relaxes. She works him with her lips and tongue, as he melts even further into the mattress. She has a profound sense of power, making such a powerful man go weak and helpless. Abby knows he’s close, so she pulls her mouth away, sliding out of her panties as she moves up his body with more kisses. She finds his mouth with hers as she moves to straddle him. His eyes are both amused and intense as she takes him deep. 

 

“I thought you weren’t trying to seduce me.” He moves his hands to grip her hips as she rises up, and she lets him. He grins up at her. 

 

Abby smiles down at him and pulls her shirt over her head as she begins to move. “I wasn’t.” She leans forward to kiss him again. “I changed my mind.” She murmurs against his mouth as her hips lift and fall. “Sex is relaxing, right?”

 

Luka’s breath hitches as she quickens the pace. “That depends.” His hands slide up to cup her breasts and he smiles as her head falls back on a moan. “On how you do it.” His quick hands continue to play over her, sliding down to where they were joined. 

 

His body is slick with the lotion she’d used, causing her to tighten her thighs to keep her purchase. Luka gasps and moans as she changes the angle, taking him deeper while his hands continue to pleasure her. 

 

Abby cries out as the orgasm flashes through her. Luka’s hands tighten on her waist as he watches her come, the beauty of the moment sending him over the edge. 

 

Abby slides down and collapses on top of him. She rests her head in the curve of his neck. She smiles when his arms come around her. “There. All better?”

 

Luka chuckles and kisses the top of her head. “Much better. Thanks.” He shifts her so she’s curled at his side, still wrapped in his arms. 

 

“I don’t like seeing you like that.”

 

He nods and rests his head on top of hers. “I know. I’m just tired. Really.”

 

She looks up and smiles when she sees his eyes are closed again. At least the tension was gone from his face. “Okay.” She strokes his arm. “Go to sleep.”

 

“Mmm. I love you.” Luka murmurs as he slides into sleep. 

 

“I love you, too.” More than she could ever explain. 

  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  



	32. Chapter 32

Abby carries two cups of coffee into the bedroom after checking on Joe. It’s Saturday morning, and Luka still seemed as run-down as he had two nights before. She smiles when she finds him still snoring, but at least he was sleeping. 

 

She sits both coffees on her nightstand and climbs back into bed with him. Propped up against the headboard, she begins to read the journal she’d been neglecting.

 

Luka gives a fitful snort and rolls to his back. She reaches over and and smooths the hair back from his face, frowning when she realizes he feels warm and a little sweaty. She slides her hand down to his throat to feel his lymph nodes. Her frown deepens when she finds them swollen. Godammit.

 

Luka’s eyes flutter open. “Stop examining me, Doctor Lockhart.”

 

She scowls at him. “Luka, you have the flu.”

 

“I do not. Stop it.” He bats at her hand. His protest is weakened by the fact that his voice is weak and rough. He starts to clear it and ends up coughing. “I had a flu shot.”

 

“You know very well that doesn’t always work.” 

 

“Abby…”

 

“Just shut up.” She fists her hands on her hips and glares at him. “Why the hell didn’t you tell me how bad you were really feeling?”

 

He rolls his eyes and then grins at her. She looks a little like an indignant fairy, sitting cross legged with her hands on her hips. “I’m fine. I do  _ not  _ have the flu.”

 

“Fever, fatigue, muscle aches, swollen nodes, coughing.” She ticks his symptoms off on her fingers. “Need I go on? Are you having any digestive issues?”

 

Luka snorts and pushes himself up, groaning a little. “No. If I have the flu, why don’t you or Joe have it?” 

 

She gives him a baleful stare. “Seriously?  _ Doctor  _ Kovac, you’re asking that question?”

 

He sighs. “Okay, okay. I don’t have the energy to argue with you.” He eyes her nightstand. “Is that coffee?”

 

“It  _ was  _ your coffee. But you can’t have it.”

 

Luka stares at her in mild horror. “Why?”

 

“Because you know damn well coffee will just dehydrate you more. I’m getting you some juice.” She swings her legs off the bed, picks up the mugs and sails out.

 

“Fuck.” Luka scowls and flops back on the pillow. He was a little run down, so what? He reaches his hand up and feels his throat, and snarls a little when when he realizes Abby’s right. His glands are swollen. He’d had the chills off and on the day before, but had put it down to the vagaries of the climate control in the ER. His throat was sore. Shit. He had the flu. He opens his mouth to speak when Abby comes back in with a tall glass of orange juice and a bottle of Tylenol.

 

“Just shut up.” She shakes two pills out and hands them and the OJ to him. Abby refuses to be swayed by the pitiful puppy-dog look he gives her. “I’m so pissed at you right now.” 

 

Luka sighs. “I know.” He takes a long drink of the juice and swallows the pills. “I’m sorry.”

 

She fists her hands in her hair and tugs, a habit that makes Luka’s affection for her rush up and strangle him. “Why, why,  _ why _ can you  _ never  _ admit it when you’re sick?”

 

“Because I’m a tough guy?” He smiles hopefully at her.

 

Abby firms her lips when they try to twitch into a smile. “Well, tough guy, you’re staying in bed and doing what I tell you for once.”

 

He scowls. “When do I ever  _ not _ do what you tell me?” Luka mutters. He smiles at her when she lets out a thin scream. He should know better than to push his luck.

 

Abby steps to him and skewers a finger in his bare chest. “Stop it. You’re the one in the wrong here.”

 

“Ouch.” He takes her hand and squeezes. “I had the same thoughts about you when you had that cold a few months back.”

 

Abby deflates a little. “I know. But  _ damn  _ it, Luka. You’ve looked like shit for three days. Every time I’ve said something you brush me off.”

 

He opens his mouth to give her some excuse. Then realizes there might be something deeper here. He tugs her down next to him on the bed. “Abby…”

 

She shakes her head. “No. Just don’t. I know I can’t undo forty-four years of you being a moron when you’re sick. But we have a child, and a life. When something is  _ really _ wrong, I expect you to tell me.” Abby blows out a breath. “Remember when Mark Greene’s tumor recurred and he didn’t tell Elizabeth?”

 

Luka rolls his eyes. “Abby, that’s not even close to the same thing.”

 

“Isn’t it? Luka, I talked to her a little during that time. She was pissed as hell at him, but under it, she was terrified. She knew something was wrong and he wouldn’t talk about it.” Abby sighs. “I don’t want that to happen to us. I don’t want you  _ protecting  _ me from things that are going on with you.  _ Every _ time you get sick you blow it off, and I’m afraid that if there’s something terribly wrong you wouldn’t tell me.”

 

Luka scoffs. “I’m not going to whine to you every time I catch a snuffle.”

 

Abby’s eyes widen in frustration and her lips go flat. He knows she’s really pissed as she doesn’t correct his verbiage. “This is hardly a sniffle, you asshole. And that’s not the point. You’ve been sick for  _ three days _ and just kept going instead of taking care of yourself. What would you be saying right now if I’d done this?”

 

Shit. She had a point. Luka sighs. “The same damn thing.” He takes her hand and kisses her palm. “Abby.” He shakes his aching head and puts a finger to her lips when she opens her mouth. “Just be quiet for a minute. I know you’re pissed, and I get why. But just listen to me.”

 

Abby sighs and gestures a go ahead. 

 

Luka tries to gather his thoughts. “My mother died when I was seventeen, you know that. Tata, well, he tried.” Luka smiles a little. “I got used to just taking care of myself when I was sick. I think I was sick maybe once the entire time I was with Danijela. She had the same reaction you are. She wouldn’t let me go to class.” He laughs and runs his hand through his hair, remembering. “I was so pissed at her, I tried to sneak out and go anyways. She was pregnant with Jasna, and when she caught me, she dragged me back to bed and told me she wasn’t putting up with my bullshit and to just stay put.”

 

Abby snorts. “You tend to marry smart women.”

 

Luka chuckles and squeezes her hand. “Yeah, I do. Anyways, after that, I didn’t have anyone to tell for a long time. I was alone, who was I going to tell?” Abby squeezes his hand and smiles sadly at him. Luka shakes his head. “My point is, even as long as we’ve been together, as friends or lovers, I’ve never seen the point in complaining when I’m sick. It’s just not how I’m wired.”

 

Abby sighs. “Okay. Okay, I get that. I do. But Goddammit Luka, you’re going to start. I don’t expect you to complain about every little ache and pain. Shit, I  _ really  _ don’t want you to do  _ that.  _ But when I flat-out ask you what’s wrong, like I’ve done for the past three days, I expect you to tell me instead of evading.”

 

“Deal.” He leans over to kiss her temple. “I’m sorry I scared you.”

 

She smiles a little. “It’s okay. Just don’t do it again.”

 

“Abby?”

 

“Hmmm?” She toys with his hand.

 

“I think I’m pretty fucking sick.”

 

She laughs. “That’s what I’ve been saying.” Abby rises and lifts his legs back into the bed. She pulls the duvet over him and kisses his forehead. “I’m going to get Joe up. I want you to finish that juice and try to sleep some more.”

 

“Okay. Hey Abby?” He calls when she turns to go to Joe. 

 

“Yeah?”

 

“Please don’t try to make soup.”

 

She snorts and shakes her head as she heads to Joe’s room. He’s just sitting up and rubbing his eyes. “Hey buddy.”

 

“Hi mama.” Joe grins and lifts his arms to her.

 

She picks him up and snuggles him in, thinking wistfully that it wouldn’t be long before he was too big for her to do this. She carries him out of the room. “Should we go make some breakfast?”

 

“Tata make ‘fast.” Joe says firmly. 

 

Abby sighs a little. “Usually. But Tata is sick, so we’re going to let him rest for a little while.”

 

Joe frowns. “Tata sick?”

 

“Yeah.”

 

“I go see.” 

 

Abby chuckles. “He’s sleeping, Joe. Mama checked him out and he’s going to be okay.”

 

Joe screws up his face in a scowl. “ _ I  _ see Tata.”

 

Abby rolls her eyes. He may have been an incredibly sweet kid, Susan was right, he got that from Luka. But he has her stubborn streak. “Fine, mini-doc. Let’s go see him.” 

 

Joe nods righteously, as if he’d expected nothing less. Abby snickers as she turns into their bedroom. She carries Joe to the side of the bed so he can see that his father is alive, if not all that well. “See? Tata’s asleep.” She whispers.

 

Joe reaches down to pat Luka, and Abby has to adjust her grip on him so he doesn’t tumble out of her arms. Luka opens his eyes and smiles at the two of them. 

 

“Dobro jutro Joe.” Luka says huskily.

 

“Tata sick?” Joe asks sympathetically.

 

“Yeah. Mama’s taking care of me. Don’t worry.” He reaches up and squeezes Joe’s arm. 

 

Joe nods. “Okay.” 

 

Abby smiles. “Young Doctor Kovac wanted to see for himself. Go back to sleep.” She starts to leave. “Do you need anything?”

 

Luka shakes his head and closes his eyes. 

 

Abby carries Joe downstairs and puts him in front on his favorite Saturday morning treat,  _ The Wiggles _ . She honestly nearly goes insane at the show, so Saturday is the only time she can tolerate having it on. She heads into the kitchen to prepare her breakfast specialty, oatmeal. 

 

With herself and Joe fed, she leaves him watching  _ Mickey Mouse Clubhouse  _ and brings Luka more juice and Tylenol. 

 

She finds him propped against the headboard, reading her NEJM. “I thought you already read that issue.” She sets the juice and the pills on his nightstand and sits beside him.

 

“I did. I’m bored.” He whines a little. 

 

Abby smirks. “Turn the TV on.”

 

He drops his head back and glares at her. “You’re really getting a kick out of this aren’t you.”

 

Abby’s lips curve. “There might be some element of satisfaction in making you stay in bed like you always do with me.”

 

“If you ate better, you wouldn’t get sick as often.”

 

Abby pokes him. “Don’t even.” She picks up the pill bottle and hands him two more. “Are you hungry?”

 

Luka shakes his head. “Not for oatmeal.”

 

She laughs. “I  _ can  _ make you something else.”

 

“No, I’m good. I don’t know if I could keep anything down.”

 

Abby glares at him. “I thought you weren’t having any gastric symptoms.”

 

He sighs. “The nausea just started.”

 

She narrows her eyes. “ _ Really _ ?”

 

“Yes, really. I just don’t want anything to eat.” He reaches for the juice to swallow the pills. “What do you plan to do today?”

 

“Grocery shopping. Do you need anything?”

 

“Gatorade.”

 

Abby snickers. “Okay. Blue or red?”

 

“Purple.”

 

She pokes him again. “That wasn’t an option, but fine. Purple Gatorade it is.” She rises. “Do you need anything else before we leave?”

 

Luka scowls at her. “I’m not an invalid. If I need anything, I’ll get it myself.”

 

“Okay. Just don’t push it.” Abby leans over and kisses his cheek. 

 

He sighs. “I won’t.”

  
  
  
  
  
  
  



	33. Chapter 33

“How was your weekend?” Sophie steps up to admit and hands Abby the chart on a patient.

 

Abby rolls her eyes. “Well, I have a husband with the flu. What does that tell you?”

 

“Oh. Yuck, sorry.” Sophie shrugs. 

 

“It’s fine. He’s actually feeling great today. He took the day off anyways. But he’s such a pain in the ass when he’s sick.” Abby scowls.

 

“Men always are.” Sophie eyes her with a smirk. “You kind of are too.”

 

Abby shoves her arm and laughs. “Shut up.” She sighs. “It was my birthday yesterday too. Fun way to spend it.”

 

“Happy birthday. Dare I ask how old?” Sophie flutters her lashes. 

 

Abby snorts. “Forty-one.”

 

“Well, you don’t look a day over thirty-five.”

 

Abby rolls her eyes and snickers. “Right. Did you get the vitals on this guy?”

 

“They’re in the chart.” 

 

“Alright. Chief complaint?”

 

“LBP.” Sophie hurries to find Doctor Michaels when Abby nods and heads to exam 2. 

 

Abby finds her patient waiting with his wife. They’re in their eighties and sitting on the bed together holding hands. Abby smiles. “Hi. I’m Doctor Lockhart. You’re having some back pain?”

 

“He’s having a lot of it but won’t admit it.”

 

“Sarah.” The old man sighs and rolls his eyes.

 

Abby grins. “I’ve got one at home just like him. Let’s have a look.” She winks at Sarah.

 

Sarah smiles back. “They never get any easier, dear. Fair warning. Jack here practically has to be gushing from an artery before I can get him to see a doctor. He’s been that way for the whole sixty years we’ve been married.”

 

“Sixty, huh? That’s a  _ really _ long time.” Abby chuckles as she places her steth. “Deep breath for me, Jack.” 

 

“Tell me about it.” Sarah squeezes Jack’s hand. “I want to keep him around awhile longer. How long have you been married?” 

 

“Almost two years.” Abby smiles a little and begins to palpate. “Any pain where I’m pushing?”

 

“No. Second time around for you?” Jack asks her.

 

“What? Oh.” Abby chuckles. “Yeah. But Luka, that’s my husband, and I have been together for a long time. It just took us awhile to get it together and make it legal.”

 

“What? Did he get you in trouble?” Jack grins and winks at her.

 

Abby steps back and smiles brightly at him. “As a matter of fact, he did.” 

 

Sarah smirks a little while Jack hoots with laughter. Abby grins. “It looks like you’ve got a pretty severe muscle strain going on. But I’m going to order some imaging to rule out anything more serious.”

 

Sarah lets out a relieved breath. “Thank goodness. So just some ibuprofen and rest? I’m a retired nurse.” She tells Abby. 

 

She nods. “And maybe some gentle stretches. Or massage.” Abby’s lips quirk.

 

Jack wiggles his eyebrows at his wife. “Hear that?”

 

Abby shakes her head. “I’m going to put in the orders. Give me a few minutes and we’ll get you moving through.”

 

Abby heads to the desk to put in the orders for MRI and X-ray. “Looks like an erector spinae strain. I want to rule out a disc issue though.” Abby tells Sophie.

 

She nods. “Okay. I’ll take him up for the X-ray and set up an appointment for the MRI.” Sophie grins. “They’re cute, aren’t they?”

 

Abby laughs. “God, yes.”

 

She heads to the lounge for coffee. She still has a couple hours left on her shift, so she calls Luka. 

 

“Hey.”

 

Luka’s cheerful voice makes her smile. “I guess I don’t need to ask how you’re feeling.”

 

“Back to a hundred percent. I’m so bored I started cleaning the pantry.”

 

“Luka, we haven’t lived there long enough to need to clean the pantry.”

 

He chuckles. “I know. But I’m bored.”

 

She grins. “Sorry. I’m off at four. What do you want for dinner?”

 

“I have dinner covered. I’ll see you in a few hours.” 

 

Abby gapes at her phone when he hangs up on her. “What the hell?” She mutters. She turns with her coffee cup, intending to grab another chart, when Sophie, Dawn, Hogan, and two other nurses, Eloise and Alexia, push into the space with her. Sophie is carrying a cupcake with a lit candle. They burst into a (bad) round of “Happy Birthday To You”. 

 

Abby laughs and shakes her head. “Thanks, Soph.” She takes the offered cupcake and blows out the candle to a round of applause. 

 

Sophie grins, unrepentant. “Birthdays are a big deal around here. And next year, now that we know, we’ll do something better.”

 

“That’s a little scary.”

 

“Be afraid.” Dawn deadpans. “Very afraid.” She grins and steps forward to hug Abby. “Happy Birthday. Now get back to work.”

 

************************************

 

It’s nearly five when Abby gets home. “Luka?” She calls out. She’s a little surprised when Katie steps out of the kitchen. “Oh, hi.”

 

“Hey, Abby. Luka’s upstairs. You’re supposed to, ah, go right up.” Katie smiles at her.

 

Abby’s brow furrows in confusion. “Okay.” She heads upstairs to find Luka in the bedroom, finishing the knot on his tie. 

 

He grins at her confused expression and walks to take her face in his hands and kiss her. “Hi.”

 

“Hi. What’s this?”

 

“This is me getting ready to take my wife out for her birthday.” He smiles at her surprise. “Did you think I wasn’t planning anything?”

 

Abby shakes her head. “You guys gave me your cards and presents yesterday.” She reaches up and fingers the locket he’d given her, from him and Joe, he’d said. 

 

He rolls his eyes. “And you spent the rest of the day taking care of me.” He kisses her again. “Now I get to take care of you.”

 

Abby can practically feel the little hearts that must be shooting out of her eyes. “That’s really sweet.”

 

Luka grins. “Get dressed. We have reservations at six thirty.”

 

“Where?” She calls out as she heads to the bathroom for a quick shower.

 

Luka chuckles. “Nice try. I’m going to check on Katie and Joe.”

 

Abby smiles and showers fast. Wrapping herself in her robe she goes to her closet to find something to wear. Little black dress? Too cliche. She smiles as she sees the dress she’d bought on a whim a few months ago. She pulls it out and lays it on the bed before she tends to her hair and makeup.

 

Luka comes in just as she’s putting on her heels. He stops dead. “Wow.”

 

She smiles slowly. “You like it?” 

 

The dress is a deep eggplant color and drapes her body perfectly. Hugging her curves and dipping low between her breasts. She’d put her hair up in some complicated knot that left some tendrils hanging around her face. Luka swallows hard and steps to her. He trails a finger down her throat, making her shiver. He leans in and brushes his lips below her ear. “Lijepe.” He kisses her mouth. “Prilično.” He murmurs. “I like  _ you.” _

 

Abby runs her hands up through his hair and smiles, a little flustered. “Does this mean I’m getting lucky tonight?” 

 

He growls a little. “You might get lucky right now.”

 

She laughs, delighted. “Absolutely not, pal. You’re taking me to dinner.”

 

Luka shakes his head and takes her hand. “Fine. But we might have to skip dessert.” He heads out to the hall with her.

 

“Oh, I think dessert will definitely be had.” 

  
  
  



	34. Chapter 34

Abby leans back in the passenger seat and closes her eyes. Luka reaches over for her hand and kisses it as he drives toward the city. “Did I mention you look beautiful?”

 

She smirks. “You mentioned something about ‘wow’, ‘nice’ and ‘pretty’, but beautiful wasn’t in there. Points for the Croatian delivery though.”

 

Luka chuckles. “Well you do.”

 

Abby opens her eyes again and smiles at him. “I had this back pain patient today. He came in with his wife because she made him come in.”

 

He lifts a brow. “Hmmm.”

 

Abby giggles. “Yeah. They’d been married sixty years. She told me you guys never get any easier.”

 

Luka glances over at her. “Do you want easy?”

 

“Hell no.” She squeezes his hand, hard. “I want you.”

 

He squeezes back. “Good. Because I want you too.” Luka pulls into a parking garage in Bay Back. He hurries around and opens the door for her before she can manage it. 

 

“Wow. Such a gentleman.” She laughs when he offers his arm. They walk down the stairs and onto the sidewalk and Abby sees where they’re heading. “Grill 23?” She lifts her brows. “Fancy.”

 

He leans down to brush his lips over her temple. “You deserve fancy.” He opens the door for her and steps up to the host stand. “Kovač.”

 

“Yes sir, madam. This way please.”

 

Abby grins at the very obvious Boston accent the young man tries to hide with smooth tones. She shakes her head at the also very obvious female head turning that occurs as they move through the restaurant toward an intimate corner booth. She waits until they’re seated with their menus and had ordered Pellegrinos. “Every woman in this place checked you out.” Abby leans forward and smiles at her husband.

 

Luka raises a brow. “I guess you didn’t notice all of the men checking  _ you _ out.” When Abby scoffs at that, he reaches over and plays with her fingers. “Abby, you look stunning.”

 

She swallows hard as a flush rises up her cheeks. “Thank you.” It fascinates her that after almost two years of marriage and nine years of knowing him, that this man can still turn her insides to jelly. She clears her throat. “So what else did you do today? Besides clean the pantry?”

 

Luka chuckles and sits back, knowing his wife’s evasions well. She was flustered, and trying not to show it. “I missed you. It made me very sad.”

 

Abby smiles softly at him. “Really?” Luka was flirting, in his Luka way. It made her want to lean over and bite his lip.

 

He toys with her fingers again. “I was all alone, in the big lonely bed, or on the big lonely couch.” He smiles at her. “The house feels empty when you’re not in it.”

 

Abby huffs out a breath. “You  _ really  _ are trying to get out of buying me dessert aren’t you.”

 

Luka laughs as the waiter appears to take their orders. At a steakhouse, you order steak. Abby getting the aged New York Strip, a house specialty. Luka orders the ribeye. 

 

He’s about to continue flirting with his wife when he hears his name. He looks over to see a pretty woman with long dark hair stride up to the table. Luka clears his throat. “Mindy. Hello.”

 

She smiles when he rises to kiss her cheek. “I thought that was you. It’s been awhile.” 

 

“Ah, yeah.” Luka glances furtively at Abby and notes she seems amused rather than annoyed. He relaxes and smiles. “About five years.” He sits again.

 

“That conference in Atlanta.” Mindy grins. 

 

“Hmm. Yeah. Ah, Min, this is my wife. Abby.”

 

Mindy smiles and offers a hand. “Hi. It’s nice to meet you.”

 

Abby smirks. “Likewise.”

 

Luka tugs at his collar, delighting his wife. “Uh, Mindy and I met at a conference. Not Atlanta. She’s a trauma surgeon.”

 

“Chicago.” Mindy tells him helpfully, obviously amused. “Is this  _ the _ Abby?”

 

Luka turns red and nearly chokes on his water. “Yeah.”

 

Abby decides to rescue him. “The one and only.” 

 

Mindy tosses her head back and laughs. “Breathe, Luka. I just wanted to say hello.”

 

He manages to compose himself and grins at her. “I’m glad you did. Ah, what are you doing in Boston?”

 

“Consulting at Harvard on a study. It’s back to sunny LA for me next week. I work at the Children’s Hospital.” She tells Abby.

 

“Really? An old friend of ours is working there now. Jing-Mei Chen.”

 

“Seriously? You guys know Chen?”

 

Luka smiles. “Yeah. We worked with her for years at County.”

 

“Oh my God! Small world.” She laughs a little.

 

“Tell her Abby and Luka say hello when you see her, will you?” Abby smiles. 

 

“Of course.” She grins. “I’ll let you get back to what is very obviously a date night. It was lovely to meet you, Abby. And to see you, handsome.” She squeezes Luka’s shoulder and glides away. 

 

Abby watches Luka over her water glass with amused eyes. She cocks a brow at him.

 

He bursts out laughing. “Well that was…”

 

“Hilarious. The word is hilarious, Luka.” She grins at him. “Was she one of your conquests when you were cutting a swath through all of the women in the land?”

 

Luka snorts. “I wasn’t  _ that _ bad.” He shrugs. “She was fun. We spent some time together.” Luka pinches her arm when she snorts over that. “Min is an interesting woman.” He says with dignity. 

 

“I’m sure she is.” She slides her foot out of her shoe and up his leg while their food is served. Grinning when he flushes again and clears his throat. “How did she know about  _ the _ Abby?”

 

He smiles at her softly. “Your name might have come up. Once or twice.” Luka picks up her hand to kiss it again. “Or three times.”

 

Abby really doesn’t know what to say to that, but it warms her and makes her a little sad at the same time, that she was on his mind so much while they were apart. She picks up her fork. “I love you so much, Luka.”

 

He picks up his own fork and grins at her. “Back at you.”

 

Back in the car, they  _ had _ skipped dessert, not out of any hurry, but due to the fact that they were both stuffed, Abby leans her seat back a little. She smiles over at him as he drives. “Thank you for tonight. It couldn’t have been more perfect.”

 

“Really?” Luka gives her a sideways glance.

 

“Really.” She laces her fingers with his when he lays his hand on her thigh. Abby smiles as his thumb starts stroking her leg, as if it has a mind of its own. She shifts a little so he has more access.

 

Luka lifts a brow when she moves, her leg shifting a bit, sending a clear invitation. He continues to drive one handed, his right hand sliding under the hem of the dress. He smiles when she gasps a little as his finger brushes the edge of her panties. 

 

Abby slides her own hand over to stroke his thigh. She didn’t have to look to know he was already hard. Her slim fingers brush over his crotch and he hisses a little. 

 

Luka abruptly pulls over a few blocks from home on a quiet patch of the street. He puts the car into park and releases her seatbelt, pulling her over into his lap. 

 

Abby runs her fingers through his hair and smiles at him. “Are we going to neck like teenagers?”

 

Luka nearly growls as he pulls her mouth to his and kisses her with a ferocity he wasn’t sure he would be able to keep in check. She’d been teasing him all night long and Luka feels like if he doesn’t touch her he’ll explode.

 

Abby moans and meets his lips and teeth and tongue with equal fierceness and abandon. She nearly whimpers as his strong hands move up to squeeze her breasts through the thin material of her dress. Shoving her coat back, she arches into him. She can feel his erection pushing into her hip, and she shifts down a bit, making him groan. 

 

Luka pulls back and stares at her. Her lips are swollen from his mouth, and she looks so fucking beautiful he nearly loses it. He brings his hands up and strokes her jaw. “Abby.” He whispers. 

 

She smiles softly at him. “Luka?”

 

“We need to get home. And be presentable for the babysitter.” 

 

Abby snorts. “You’re right.” She climbs off his lap, back into the passenger seat. She glances at his pants. “Want a quick handjob?”

 

Luka’s head falls back and he laughs. No other woman had ever made him laugh like Abby could. It’s no wonder he wanted her so badly, always. “I think we can manage without that.” He shifts the car into drive and manages the next few blocks. By the time he pulls into the driveway, he figured he could manage a conversation with Katie without embarrassing himself. 

 

Abby waits for him to come around the car and takes his hand. She lifts a brow when a car pulls into they drive behind them. 

 

“Must be Katie’s ride. I ah, texted her that we were on the way.”

 

Abby snickers. “To get her out of the way quickly?”

 

Luka shrugs. “Maybe.”

 

Katie rises from the couch when they come in. “Hi! Joe’s asleep. I think my ride’s here.”

 

Luka pulls out his wallet and pays her. “Thanks for doing this on such short notice, Katie.” He smiles at her.

 

“It’s no problem at all. We had fun.” She smiles at Abby. “Wow, you look fantastic. Happy Birthday!”

 

Abby smiles. “Thank you so much.” She walks Katie to the door and waves her off. “Now.”

 

Luka is way ahead of her. He shuts the door and deftly locks it. He hitches Abby up, letting her legs wrap around his waist. He kisses her hard with her back to the door. 

 

“Luka.” Abby brings her hands up to his face and smiles at him. “Take me upstairs and make love to me.”

 

He doesn’t need telling twice and strides to the stairs and up. He curses when he trips a little and has to brace her against the wall so he doesn’t drop her. Abby laughs breathlessly. 

 

Luka leans in to take her mouth. “It wouldn’t be funny if I dropped you on your ass.” He mutters against her lips.

 

Abby laughs again and snuggles her head into the curve of his neck and lets him carry her the rest of the way to the bedroom. Luka lays her down on the bed and runs his eyes over her. That  _ look _ that makes her belly dance and her knees weak. 

 

“Abby.” He breathes. He slides down onto her, kissing her neck as his hands roam her body. Her body is a constant fascination to him and he wants it, wants  _ her _ , with a passion he’d never thought possible. Luka pushes up to straddle her, keeping his eyes on hers as he pulls off his jacket and tie. Then his shirt. He leans down to press a kiss to the underside of her jaw, just below her ear, and feels her shiver. 

 

Abby’s arms are so weak, it takes her two tries to wrap her arms around him. Luckily, the dress was the type he could just peel her out of, and she admits to picturing him doing just that when she’d bought it. His lips are roaming lower, and she bites her lip to hold back a scream when his hand moves between her legs to cup her. She had been half turned-on all evening, and her nerve endings were ready to explode. 

 

Luka slides down between her thighs, smiling at the sounds she’s making. He knew the feeling. He slides the dress up her body and pushes it over her head, tossing it in a heap on the floor. He knew he wasn’t treating that lovely garment very nicely, but he was too far gone to care. Luka groans as he takes in the sight of his wife. Tiny panties, thigh high stockings, and no bra. She was still wearing her shoes. His eyes nearly cross at the pleasure of it. 

 

Abby opens her eyes to see him raking his eyes down her body again. She smiles when she understands how absolutely lost in her he is in this moment. She raises her arms above her head and grips the headboard. “Take what you want, Luka.”

 

Luka’s control snaps. On a snarl, he drops down and kisses her belly, his lips rough against her skin as he yanks the barrier away from her body. His hands slide down her thighs, and he decides to leave the stockings where they are. He moves lower and kisses her thigh, making her gasp and arch up, as he teases her with his mouth. He rides his tongue along the inside of her other thigh and smiles when Abby gasps his name. 

 

Finally,  _ finally _ he uses his mouth on her. Abby writhes under him, her choked cries music to his ears. He very nearly comes himself when he feels her break, the orgasm causing her to shake as though she’d had an electric shock. 

 

Luka slides up her body, ridding himself of his pants as he goes. He braces himself over her. “Abby.” He whispers, watching her face as her eyes flutter open. “Look at me,  _ Draga. _ ” He drives himself into her, causing her to cry out again. 

 

Luka is thrusting deep and hard inside her, murmuring endearments in Croatian. Abby feels like her brain has short-circuited. She can’t seem to find control and feels like she’s on a spinning carousel that’s gone mad. She manages to wrap her legs around him, watching his face, and the intensity of his eyes as he moves in her. Every nerve in her body has been lit on fire and she comes again, nearly blacking out at the intensity of it. 

 

Luka coils and shudders as his own orgasm blinds him. He collapses in a heap on top of her. 

 

“Oof.” Abby manages, barely, to get her arms around him and stroke his hair.

 

“Sorry. Give me a minute.”  Luka buries his face in her neck. 

 

His voice is slurred and his accent thick. He doesn’t seem inclined to move. Abby smiles and continues stroking him. “All I can say to that is...wow.”

 

Luka lifts his head and grins at her. “I think  _ wow _ is accurate.” He shifts so he can roll off from her, he knows he’s heavy. He draws her over to his side, his brain starting to clear of the haze of lust that had fogged it most of the night. “We should check on Joe.”

 

Abby nods. “He’s fine, the monitor is on. But I’d feel better if we looked.” She gives him a little grin. 

 

Luka chuckles. “I’ll get it.” He leans over to give her a soft, slow kiss. “Happy birthday, baby.”

 

Abby smiles as she watches him pull his sweats on and go to check on their son. She snuggles into the pillow. Happy birthday indeed. 

  
  
  



	35. Chapter 35

Luka walks in the door from his shift and tosses his keys on the hall table. He glances into the living room while he removes his coat and shoes to see Abby sitting on the floor between the couch and the coffee table, phone at her ear, with her fingers pinching the bridge of her nose. He sighs a little. Maggie. Luka moves over to crouch down and murmur hello to Joe, who’s putting a puzzle together on the floor. Running his fingers over his son’s head, he climbs onto the couch behind his wife, dropping a kiss to the top of her head, and kneading her tight shoulders.

 

Abby tips her head back and rolls her eyes at him while she continues to listen to her mother’s rambling. She reaches back and squeezes his hand while he continues to rub her shoulders. She leans back between his legs and closes her eyes. “Okay mom. Yes.” More listening. “Sure. That should be fine. I’ll check with Luka.” Abby blows out a breath. “No, Maggie, but I don’t know if he has anything planned.”

 

Luka lifts a brow, somewhat amused. Lord only knows what sort of things Maggie is wondering about and assuming. He leans forward to press a kiss to her neck when she ends the call. “Hi.”

 

“Hi. That was Maggie.”

 

“Really?” He chuckles and continues rubbing his hands up and down her arms. 

 

Abby sighs and laughs a little. “Yeah, stating the obvious, huh?”

 

“Everything okay?”

 

She shrugs and leans back into his hands. “Okay for Maggie. Why can’t I have a normal family, Luka?”

 

He shakes his head and slides off the couch behind her, drawing her into his lap. He turns her face to his and kisses her softly. “You do.”

 

Abby snorts at that. “You think we’re normal?”

 

Luka chuckles. “As normal as it gets, moja ljubavi.”

 

She sighs and leans her head on his shoulder. “I suppose. I just wish I could be happy that my mother and brother want to come visit instead of worrying it to death.”

 

Luka nods and wraps his arms more tightly around her. “We’ll handle it. We always do.”

 

“I know. And I do want to see them. It’s just…”

 

“You’re worried about both of them not staying on their meds and burning the house down.”

 

“Basically.” Abby shakes her head. “And that’s stupid. Maggie’s stayed on them for three years now. Eric has been consistent for a year. But there’s always a part of me that doubts it will last.”

 

Luka nods. “I know.”

 

Abby tips her head back to look at him. “Do you feel like that with me?”

 

He’s stroking her arm absently, and his fingers still. “What?”

 

“Do you feel like you always need to worry that I’ll drink again?” She toys with her fingers in her lap.

 

Luka draws her back. “Where the hell is this coming from?” He murmurs.

 

Abby shakes her head. “I feel like that about them  _ all the time _ , Luka. I wouldn’t blame you for it.”

 

“No. I don’t worry about it. That’s different.” He kisses her between the eyes.

 

“ _ How _ ?”

 

Luka blows out a breath. “Abby, I’ve known you for nine years. I’ve seen you struggle and triumph with  _ so much.  _ I’m living with you, watching you work your steps, and doing everything in your power to stay sober. I know it’s always a possibility, and I accept that as part of you. But I don’t worry about it. I’m proud of you, draga.” 

 

Abby buries her face in his chest. “I know you are. Thank you.” 

 

Luka kisses her head again. “Do you need a meeting?”

 

Abby lifts her head and stares at him. “Again with the reading my mind. We should get you a one eight hundred number.”

 

He chuckles. “It apparently only works on you.” He squeezes her arms. “Go. I’ll get dinner.”

 

Luka watches as she kisses Joe, gathers her bag and coat, and leaves. He looks over at his son. “Want to help Tata make dinner?”

 

Joe scrambles to his feet and toddles toward the kitchen without a word. 

 

Luka smirks at that. The boy loved to help with anything. That wouldn’t last, but it was sweet right now. 

 

He decides on a quick pasta dish. Abby would only be gone about an hour. She’d found a club with meetings at all times a couple of blocks from them. Luka pulls out a skillet and a pot, as well as a saucepan for Joe to play with, and sets to work.

 

Cooking had always been enjoyable for him. He did the bulk of it, even with Danijela, who actually knew how, unlike Abby. He smirks, thinking of how cute she was when she tried to cook something new. She  _ hated  _ cooking, but would attempt it on certain occasions.

 

He sets the angel hair in the boiling pot and grins again thinking of her cooking for his birthday, back in October. She’d called Niko for a recipe and his brother had been delighted to share one with her. Luka snickers remembering her frustration at trying to get the complicated Croatian dish right. He’d come home from his shift to find her ready to explode with anger over it not turning out exactly right. It had tasted just fine, even if it hadn’t looked so pretty. 

 

She never gave herself enough credit. It was one of the things about her that baffled and frustrated him. Luka knew very well why she did that. Between her childhood and her marriage to that asshole Richard, she’d been made to feel like she never did anything right. Carter hadn’t helped, he mused. Luka sighs. He probably hadn’t helped all that much either. He shakes the oil and, garlic, olives, tomatoes and shrimp he has sautéing in the pan and lowers the heat. Damnit. One more thing for them to work through. Not that he wanted her to change. He didn’t. But he wished she wouldn’t be so damned hard on herself. 

 

Luka is sliding the pasta onto plates when Abby comes in. “Good timing.”

 

Abby wraps her arms around him from behind. “It smells amazing. Is it that shrimp pasta thing?”

 

He squeezes her hands. “Yeah. Hey Joe, dinner.”

 

Joe scrambles up and climbs into his booster. They’d switched out his hi-chair the week before. “I help Mama!” Joe grins at Abby.

 

“Did you? Good job, buddy.” She ruffles his hair and sits across from her husband. “What’s wrong?”

 

Luka sighs. “You read me pretty well yourself. Nothing really.” He breaks bread off from the crusty loaf for all of them. “I was just thinking about some stuff while I was cooking.”

 

She raises a brow. “Thinking about how I can’t?”

 

“Yes. No. Sort of.” Luka stuffs pasta in his mouth and chews, unsure how to say what he wants to.

 

Abby cocks her head at him. “You knew I couldn’t cook when you married me. What the hell, Luka?”

 

Luka snorts and rolls his eyes. “No, it’s not that. Not at all. I  _ like  _ cooking. And you do enough around here.”

 

“Then what?” She asks in annoyance.

 

“I was thinking about that dinner you made me for my birthday. How you called Niko to get a recipe and worked so hard to put it together. And you still felt like you failed at it.”

 

Sincerely baffled now, she stares at him. “I  _ did  _ fail at it.”

 

Luka shakes his head. “No, you didn’t. It tasted great. To be honest, I would have probably loved it even if it hadn’t. Because you made it for me.”

 

She rolls her eyes. “You being blinded by your hormones doesn’t change anything.”

 

Luka’s grin flashes at her. “I’m serious. But my point is, I wish you could see what I do when you do things like that.”

 

“I don’t understand you.” Abby’s brow furrows.

 

He reaches across the table and takes her hand. “I see the woman I love, going out of her way to do something special for me. I see you doing whatever it takes to make a good life for us. I see a woman who loves her family, all of it, fiercely and does everything she can to keep them all safe and healthy. I see a woman who never gave up on her dream to be a doctor, even with countless obstacles. I just wish you would give yourself more credit.”

 

Abby nods. “I know I have a hard time with that. And I know it frustrates you.”

 

Luka shakes his head. “It’s not about me. You’re amazing, Abby. I just want to make sure you know that  _ I  _ always know that. Even if you don’t always believe it. That’s all.”

 

She smiles a little. “Wow. That was quite a bit of thinking you got done over the pasta boiling.”

 

He smiles at her, relieved to have gotten out what he needed to. “It was. And the bonus is, you get to do the dishes.”

 

Abby’s grin flashes. “Goes without saying.”

 

He takes another forkful of pasta, relieved to have gotten that off his chest. Luka didn’t broach the subject of Maggie again, she’d tell him soon enough. He knew all of it was difficult for her. But he did have something else. “Hey, I keep forgetting. You know Allie at work?”

 

“The one who thinks you’re an old man?”

 

He chuckles. “Yeah. Her. Ah, she wants to go to medical school.”

 

Abby frowns at him. “Okay.”

 

“I mentioned that you used to be a nurse. She was complaining about overnights.” He waves a hand.

 

She snorts. “I don’t miss them. At all.”

 

Luka grins. “Me either. But she was surprised when I told her you were a nurse before you became a doctor, and she wondered if she could talk to you sometime.”

 

Abby smiles. “Sure. Okay, yeah.”

 

“You can impart all of your wisdoms and bitch together about what assholes ER doctors generally are.”

 

Abby takes the last bite of her pasta. “Especially tall, Croatian ones. They’re the absolute worst. People should avoid them if possible.”

 

Luka squeezes her hands. “That’s very true.”

 

She gives him a soft smile. “It’s really not. But thanks for agreeing.”

 

“Anytime.”

  
  



	36. Chapter 36

Abby walks into the small coffee shop a few blocks from Luka’s hospital. She was meeting Allie before her shift. Luka had given her a vague description of the woman, so the petite blonde in scrubs was easy to spot. Abby grabs a latte and walks over to the table where she was sitting. “Allie?”

 

Allie looks up and blinks deep green eyes. “Doctor Lockhart?”

 

Abby sits and reaches out a hand. “Yeah, call me Abby. It’s nice to meet you.”

 

“Same. Wow, you’re pretty.” Allie flushes. “Sorry.”

 

Abby snorts. “Did Luka tell you to say that?”

 

Allie grins. “No. Just an observation. I tend to just blurt out whatever I’m thinking.” She waves her hand. “Thanks for meeting with me, really.”

 

Abby sips her latte. “It’s no problem. Luka said you’re thinking about Med school?” 

 

“Yeah. It’s completely overwhelming. I’m just wondering if you can give me some direction.”

 

“Sure. Do you have your BSN? Because you’d need a Bachelors before you even think about medical school.”

 

“Yeah.”

 

“MCAT?”

 

“Um, not yet. I’ve been studying for it, but haven’t applied to take it yet.”

 

Abby nods. “Well those are your first few hurdles.” She studies the young woman. In looks, she reminded Abby a little bit of Sam Taggart. But she was the polar opposite in personality. Abby could see why Luka seemed a little protective of her. “Allie, I’m going to be honest. My path to an MD isn’t one I would recommend. It was pretty fraught.”

 

Allie’s brow crinkles. “What do you mean?”

 

Abby sighs. “I had a lot of financial problems. I had to take a leave, twice, because of them. I was going through a bad divorce the first time, the second…” She trails off, thinking of the chaos of that time. “The second I had a lot of other crap going on. I’m lucky I had the friends I had. Including the boyfriend I had.”

 

Allie grins. “Luka?”

 

“Yeah. For awhile.” She waves that away. “My point is, it’s important to have support. Especially if you plan to continue working as a nurse. Do you?”

 

“Yeah. I couldn’t afford it otherwise. I don’t want to ask my mom. She’s been through enough, and she doesn’t need to add my financial problems to her own.”

 

Abby smiles softly, thinking of what Allie had told Luka. “Your Dad is gone, right?”

 

“Doctor Kovač told you?”

 

“He did. It was really sweet that you told him that, by the way.”

 

Allie looks down at her coffee. “It was just the truth. And I was getting sick of all of the dumb jokes. I could tell they were making him uncomfortable.”

 

Abby snorts. “Luka’s used to jokes about his looks and nurses having a thing for him. Trust me.”

 

Allie smiles wide. “I bet. But I didn’t want him thinking that about me. Especially since, well, it seemed weird, seeing as he really does remind me of my dad. And the other thing was, he just lights up when he talks about you. It would be pretty stupid of me to try and play homewrecker with somebody so obviously besotted with his wife.”

 

Abby snickers. “Besotted. That’s a good word.” She leans back. “I can see why Luka likes you, Allie.”

 

“Thanks. I really like working with him. He doesn’t treat nurses like idiots like some docs do.”

 

“Yeah, I kicked his ass over that a long time ago. He knows better these days.” Abby grins at Allie’s giggle. She checks her watch. “You’re on at six?”

 

“Yeah.”

 

“Okay, we’ve got a couple of minutes. A few more things. You understand that the models for nursing school and medical school are completely different, right?”

 

Allie’s brow furrows as she frowns. “What do you mean?”

 

Abby sighs, unsurprised that nobody had explained it. “The medical model follows a more clinical approach. It focuses more on pathology, anatomy, physiology, differential diagnosis, biochemistry, and just...the pathways of disease and conditions and how to treat them.” Abby continues at Allie’s nod. “The nursing model is more about treating the whole patient. Emotional well being, physical needs. Nurses don’t need to know the minutiae because we aren’t doing the diagnosing. We learn the basics, sure, but doctors go a  _ lot  _ more in depth. They’re different for a reason.”

 

“Okay. I get that.”

 

“I’m just saying, be prepared. You’ll have a bit of a head start, but so will anyone else who did an undergrad in a health career, or just the biomedical sciences.”

 

Allie grins. “So don’t be an arrogant ass going in, is that what you’re saying?”

 

Abby laughs. “That’s exactly what I’m saying.” She finishes her coffee. “Mind if I walk over to the hospital with you? I’ll say hi to Luka. I haven’t seen your ER yet.”

 

“Sure.” Allie gathers her jacket and purse and they start the walk. “So you’re liking Mass Gen?”

 

“Yeah. It’s a great hospital.”

 

“Uptown.” Allie snickers.

 

Abby grins. “Yeah, it sure is different from County.”

 

Allie glances over at her. “Luka talks about Country a lot. Is that where you two met?”

 

Abby smiles. “Yeah. We have a long and interesting story.”

 

Allie laughs as she pulls open the doors in the ambulance bay. “I kind of got that impression.” She waves at the nurse manning the cage, who buzzes them in. “Hey, Mike. This is Abby. Doctor Kovač’s wife.”

 

Mike grins. “Hey, nice to meet you. I think the big doc is in the lounge.”

 

Allie nods and leads Abby toward a setup not so different from County. No wonder Luka felt so comfortable here. They walk in on two doctors having a heated discussion about the depth of the Red Sox pitching bench for the upcoming season. Luka is leaning against the counter watching them with an amused and chagrined expression. Abby sighs. One day, she was determined that he would understand baseball. Luka glances over at their entrance. 

 

“Hey!” He walks over and tips his wife’s face back for a kiss. “How was your talk?” He glances at Allie.

 

“It was great. Thanks so much for setting it up.” She stores her gear in her locker. “Thanks again Abby. I’ll see you again?”

 

“Count on it.” Abby smiles at her at she heads out for her shift.

 

“I hope this is your wife, Kovač.” Daniels takes a sip of his coffee and smirks. 

 

Luka grins. “Yeah. This is Abby.” He slides his arm around her shoulders and faces Daniels and Gorsch. “Abby, Doctor Daniels and Doctor Gorsch.”

 

“Nice to meet you.”

 

They both extend hands for a shake. “Likewise.” Gorsch grins at her. “So you’re the culprit who keeps him up late watching movies.”

 

Abby snorts. “If he would put more work into understanding American pop culture, it wouldn’t be necessary.”

 

Daniels shakes his head. “I think he might be a lost cause.”

 

Abby grins. “He’s not. You have no idea how far he’s come in nine years.”

 

Luka pokes her. “Only because you’re relentless.”

 

She raises her brows. “So?”

 

He shakes his head. A little proud, in spite of himself. “Are you heading home?”

 

“Yeah. Just wanted to stop and say hi since I was so close.” She leans into him when he kisses her temple. “I’ll get the kid.”

 

“Okay.” He glances at the other two doctors who take the hint.

 

“Ah, back to work.” Daniels drains his coffee. He and Gorsch leave, giving Luka a moment alone with his wife.

 

“I should be home on time. We’re dead in here today.” Luka runs his hands up Abby’s arms. 

 

Abby smiles. “Alright. I figured on stopping at that deli and just getting us some sandwiches. Does that work?”

 

Luka pulls her in and wraps his arms around her. “Sure. You okay?”

 

“Mmm. Just tired. Maggie called again.” She tips her head back. “We’ll talk about it when you get home.”

 

He nods and watches her leave. Sighing a little, he heads out to the desk. Gorsch grins at him. “Your wife is hot.”

 

Luka lifts a brow. “I know.”

 

Marcus snickers. “Just saying. It’s no wonder.”

 

“No wonder what?” Luka’s brow creases.

 

“Come on. All the women around here practically drool all over you. You never give them a second glance. Or even seem to notice.” 

 

Luka shrugs. “I love my wife.” He grins a little. “And according to her, I’m oblivious to that sort of thing anyways.”

 

“We’ve noticed.”

 

Luka shakes his head and wanders out to wait for the incoming trauma. He finds Allie already outside. “Hey. Everything good?”

 

Allie smiles. “Your wife is pretty great. Thanks again. She gave me some really good advice.”

 

“I’m glad to hear it. If anyone knows about all of the issues of going from nurse to doctor, it’s Abby.”

 

“Yeah. Sounds like it. She said I could call her anytime.”

 

Luka nods, wondering how much Abby had divulged. “If she said that, she meant it. You should take her up on it.”

 

Allie nods. “I will. I really liked her. You’re lucky.”

 

“I know.”

***************************************

Abby and Joe are into the last half hour of  _ Toy Story _ when Luka comes in. She looks up from the couch and smiles. “Hi.”

 

He grins and drops down on the couch next to her, draping an arm around her shoulders. “Hey. This again, huh?” 

 

Abby smirks. “I can’t wait until they release another one. At least it will be something new.”

 

Luka nods and closes his eyes, smiling when she leans her head on his shoulder. “Did you know you’re hot?”

 

Abby tilts her head at him. “You may have told me that. Once or twice.”

 

“Gorsch told me he gets why I ignore other women now.”

 

Abby snuggles closer to him and grins. “Sweet talker.”

 

He chuckles. “It’s just the truth. Why look at anyone else when I have you?”

 

“Are you trying to get lucky?” She rubs her hand up and down his arm.

 

“Actually, no. I’m starving. Did you guys eat?”

 

“Joe did. I waited for you.”

 

He nods. “Sandwiches in the kitchen?”

 

Luka rises at her nod. “I’ll get them.”

 

He settles back on the couch and hands her a sandwich. Unwrapping his own, he bites in and sighs. “This is really good.” He says with his mouth full.

 

Abby laughs. “You really are hungry.”

 

He swallows. “I am. So, your talk with Allie was good? She said you gave her some good direction.”

 

Abby smiles. “Yeah. I just told her my story. And explained the difference between the nursing and medical model.” She blows out a frustrated breath. “I really wish they would talk about that more in undergrad.”

 

Luka shrugs. “It really only applies in a situation like yours.”

 

She shakes her head. “No it doesn’t Luka. It contributes to a lot of confusion with patients and the general public, and both professions. They aren’t the same, and they shouldn’t be treated like they are at all similar.” Abby rolls her eyes at his sideways glance. “You end up with nurses thinking they know the same things doctors do and vice versa. It’s annoying and frustrating to those of us who have done both.”

 

Luka’s lips quirk a little. “It’s funny because I know  _ exactly  _ who you’re thinking of. On both ends.”

 

Abby laughs. “But they aren’t the only ones, and you know it. Carter and Sam are just the extremes that we happen to be acquainted with.” 

 

Luka touches his tongue to his bottom lip and smirks with his eyes dancing in a gesture she finds secretly adorable. “Well acquainted.”

 

Abby hits him with the throw pillow and makes him snicker. “My  _ point _ is, it’s important to teach the distinction. But nobody does.”

 

He grabs her hand and rubs his thumb over the back to soothe her before she works herself up more. “I know. You’re absolutely right.”

 

Abby scowls at him. “Are you patronizing me?”

 

Luka presses a kiss to her palm. “No, I’m serious. I agree. But there’s not much you can do about it.” He leans in to kiss her when she grumbles. “What did Maggie want?”

 

She eyes him. He was changing the subject and she knew it. But it worked. Abby sighs. “She and Eric are coming next weekend.”

 

“Okay.”

 

Abby pulls back to look at him. “Just ‘Okay’? That’s all you have to say?”

 

Luka sighs. “Abby, what do you want me to say? They’re your family.  _ Our  _ family now. They’re  _ always  _ welcome here. I won’t be the reason or the excuse for you to hold them off from coming.”

 

Abby jerks her hand free and scowls. “That’s not what I’m doing.”

 

Luka just lifts a brow and watches her steadily until she thins her lips and nods. 

 

“Okay. That’s exactly what I’m doing. Looking for you to give me a reason to hold them off.” She closes her eyes and leans back into him. “I’m sorry.”

 

Luka brings his hand up to stroke her hair. “I know. It’s alright, baby. You miss them, I know you do.”

 

“Of course I do, but….”

 

“But nothing. That’s what’s important. Maggie is Joe’s grandmother. He deserves to know her, and she deserves to know him. I don’t really know your brother, but I’d like to get to know him. It’s time for us to blend our lives completely, Abby, whether we like it or not.”

 

Abby sighs. “You’re right. It worked out okay with Niko. I thought he would hate me after how I acted in Chicago.”

 

Luka shakes his head. “I explained things to him...as best as I could without having all the information. And I had a really long talk with him before we got back together. He understands. He knows you make me happy, and that you love me, and that’s what’s important to him.” 

 

Abby nods, thinking of her relief at how Niko had treated her in Croatia, and again when she had called about Luka’s birthday. With cheerful welcome. “Okay. I like him a lot, for what it’s worth. Ana and the boys too.”

 

Luka grins. “Ana’s so happy to have another female Kovač. She’s been outnumbered for years. Still is, but since Danijela and Jasna died, she’s been the only one. Me settling down again was very exciting for her.”

 

Abby laughs a little. “Really?”

 

“When I told them we were married, Ana put her hands on her hips and said ‘You’d better not fuck this up mali brat.”

 

Abby’s brow furrows. “What?”

 

“Oh. Sorry. That means ‘little brother’.”

 

Abby snorts. “Apt.”

 

He pokes her. “Anyway. She said she’s been waiting  _ forever  _ for this day, and I’d better keep you.”

 

Abby smiles. “Well, I’ve got no plans to go anywhere.”

 

Luka kisses her temple. “Good. Ah, they want to visit this summer sometime. Ana and the boys have never been to America.”

 

She smiles and nods. “I’d like that a lot.”

 

He tightens his grip on her. “Okay.” Luka smiles down at Joe, who had fallen asleep on the floor in front of the TV. “We should probably put him to bed, huh?”

 

Abby grins. “Responsible parenting one oh one.”

 

Luka laughs and rises. “I’ve got him. See you upstairs?”

 

“Yeah. I’ll just call Maggie and give her the final go ahead.” She smiles at his grin and watches him go. Abby takes a deep breath and dials the phone. “Hi mom.”

  
  
  
  
  
  



	37. Chapter 37

“So how are things?” Doctor Anders sits back and crosses her legs as Abby and Luka take their usual seats in her office.

 

Abby shifts. “Ah, fine with us. We’ve had a few things come up lately that we managed to talk through.”

 

“Such as?” Anders gives a small smile.

 

“Well, something that’s always bugged me about Luka is how he hides it when he’s sick or hurting. He had the flu a few weeks ago, and it scared me enough that I kind of let him have it.” Abby smiles sheepishly at Luka, and he smirks in response.

 

Anders laughs a little. “In my experience, men go one of two ways when they’re sick. Full out whining and moping,  _ or  _ trying to pretend they’re fine. There’s no in between.”

 

Luka clears his throat. “Told you.” He takes Abby’s hand for a squeeze. She shakes her head at him.

 

“Yeah. But it makes me crazy. So I called him out for it, and we talked about it. All good now, hopefully.”

 

Anders nods. “Okay, what else?”

 

Luka smiles a little. “Something that bothers  _ me  _ is Abby not giving herself any credit for everything she does and accomplishes.”

 

Anders raises a brow. “Do you understand why she feels like that?”

 

“Yeah. I’ve always understood. It doesn’t make it easier when she berates herself for the tiniest little things.”

 

Anders looks at Abby. “Do  _ you _ understand why you feel that way?”

 

Abby clears her throat. “Yeah. I mean...my mother never made me feel like I was doing anything wrong intentionally. But I always felt like there should be  _ something  _ I could do to help her.”

 

“But you couldn’t. You know that’s not your fault.” Anders nods. 

 

“I know that now. Of course I do.” Abby scowls when Luka gives a little snort and then sighs. “Okay. I’m working on knowing that.” She shakes her head. “And then my marriage to Richard...he made me feel like I never did anything right.” 

 

Luka shifts to put his arm around her, feeling the usual feelings of bafflement and rage that anyone could treat their spouse that way. The fact that it was Abby just magnified it. He kisses the top of her head.

 

Anders smiles at them. “Luka doesn’t make you feel that way, does he?”

 

Abby shakes her head emphatically. “No.”

 

“But there are still triggers there, I’m sure.”

 

Abby sighs. “It’s nothing he does. It’s all me. I take what he said wrong, or I blow the slightest criticism out of proportion. I guess it’s a defense mechanism.”

 

“Luka? How do you handle that?”

 

Luka had been watching Abby with realization dawning. “What? Oh.” He clears his throat. “I ah, I usually just try to shut it out.”

 

“Why?”

 

He sighs. “Because that’s my default. I’ve always done that when I get frustrated or angry. I know how bad my temper can be, so I try to shut it down. I’ve done it since I was a kid.”

 

Anders sits back and shifts her legs again. “It’s good that you recognize what happens to you when your temper is up. But you need to learn to talk to Abby about these things.”

 

Luka nods. “Yeah. I guess I didn’t realize I was even doing it.”

 

Abby smirks a little. “I  _ do _ appreciate your attempts at talking me down when I go a little nutty.”

 

He grins at her. “Which is often.”

 

“Yeah.” Abby sighs. “Ah, my mother and brother are coming to visit this weekend. It’s got me pretty worked up.”

 

Anders studies them. “Understandable. How are you handling it?”

 

“By trying not to think too much about it. All of the things that could go wrong.”

 

“Why do you expect things to go wrong?”

 

Abby snorts. “It’s nearly inevitable. Maggie coming to visit is almost never good for Luka and I.”

 

“She was a rock when Joe was in the NICU.” Luka smiles a little and takes Abby’s hand again. “Even though she annoyed everybody else.”

 

Abby shakes her head. “Yeah, she was great. But that’s not her usual MO and you know it. She generally comes in, says too much and stays too long. And that’s just the easy stuff.” 

 

Luka rolls his eyes. “Why are you worried so much about what she says? It’s nothing I don’t know.”

 

Abby sighs. “I know it. I guess I always think of that first time, when she was off her meds.” She turns to Anders. “The first time my mother turned up after I met Luka, she was off her medication. She showed up at the hospital and humiliated me. He tried to help, but I was so afraid he would see that and decide I wasn’t worth it.”

 

Luka raises a brow at her. “For one thing, Abby, I’m a doctor. I understand bipolar disorder. For another, you’re not your mother. I’ve always known that, and you’ve always been worth it to me.” He brings her hand to his lips.

 

Anders smiles. “It sounds like Luka’s willing to help you with this, Abby, if you let him.”

 

Abby scowls a little. “I know that, now. But back then, our relationship was brand new. We’d only been together for a couple of weeks when she showed up. She tips my balance of how I behave around him.”

 

“And I didn’t go anywhere that time. You really think she could do or say anything  _ now _ that would change how I feel about you?” He stares at her incredulously. “Seriously? After all we’ve been through? Don’t be an idiot, Abby.”

 

Her brows draw together. “Don’t call me an idiot.”

 

“I didn’t. I told you not to be one. I’ll repeat. You are  _ not  _ your mother.”

 

Abby sighs and squeezes his hand. “I know. She just tends to bring all of  _ my _ baggage to the forefront.”

 

Luka snorts. “Your baggage sits right next to mine in our closet. I’m still here, and so are you.”

 

Anders laughs a little. “I’m feeling a little superfluous here.”

 

Abby grins at her. “Sorry.”

 

She waves a hand. “No need. It means you two are making progress. You told me in your first session that you both have a hard time talking about the hard stuff. That doesn’t seem to be so much the case anymore.” 

 

Luka smiles. “It’s not.”

 

“How about your brother? You mentioned he’s bipolar too?”

 

Abby sighs. “Yeah. He was diagnosed about six years ago. I thought he had made it past the point where it would hit him. But he didn’t. He’s been on and off his meds. According to Maggie, he’s stayed on them for the past year.”

 

Anders lifts a brow. “You don’t believe that?”

 

“I want to. But I never can know for sure until I see them. I guess I have to wait and find out.” The timer beeps.

 

“Good. Worrying about it is useless” She smiles when Abby nods and Luka smirks. “I have no doubt you’ll handle this visit admirably. And you can call anytime if you need anything. Just continue talking like you have been. You’ll be fine. I’ll see you both soon.”

 

*******************************************

 

“Abby?” Luka calls out as he walks into the bedroom. He had taken bath and bedtime with Joe after dinner, and now his shirt was soaked.

 

“In here.” 

 

Luka turns into their open bathroom to find his wife submerged in bubbles up to her neck in the tub. He grins at her and starts stripping off his shirt.

 

Abby lifts a brow. “Did I say I wanted company?”

 

He quirks a brow back at her while he unbuckles his belt. “Don’t you?” He steps out of his pants and sits on the edge, trailing a hand through the water. He gives her a little splash and smiles when she laughs. “This tub was a big selling point for you when we bought the house. We’ve barely used it for its intended purpose..”

 

“Baths?” Abby grins at him and grabs his arm to pull him in. She’s laughing when he surfaces, scowling. 

 

“You could have let me get my underwear and socks off.” 

 

“Nah. More fun this way.” She giggles while he fights with his leftover garments and slides behind her, leaning back on the edge with her snug between his legs. “Joe asleep?”

 

“Mmm.” Luka wraps his arms tight around her and rests his head on top of hers. “He barely made it through his story. He was a little cranky.”

 

Abby sighs. “Yeah. It seemed like it during dinner. He’ll be fine.” She lifts her arm up to hook it around his neck.

 

Luka nods. “Are we okay?” He shakes his head when Abby stills. “I mean, everything we talked about in the session.”

 

“Yes.”

 

“Abby, I never realized that anything between us could remind you of your marriage to Richard.”

 

“It doesn’t, Luka. You’ve never made me feel like he did.”

 

He strokes her arm. “Haven’t I? You said…”

 

Abby shakes her head. “I know what I said. But it’s not on you. It doesn’t happen very often.”

 

Luka tips her face back with a fingertip and stares into her eyes. 

 

She smiles a little. “Anymore. And I mean it. I know you don’t do it intentionally. Richard  _ did.  _ It’s my own reactions that I need to work on.” Abby takes his hand. “I don’t want you to take this as a reason to stop talking to me. Or even fighting the way we fight. It’s okay. You haven’t done anything wrong.”

 

“I just don’t want to do anything to hurt you.” He kisses the top of her head.

 

“You haven’t. Really.” Abby slides her foot up his leg. “I love you, Luka. Just the way you are.”

 

“Hmmm. Even when I’m annoying?” He slides his lips up her neck to nibble at her ear.

 

Abby smiles softly and closes her eyes. “Even then.” She sighs when his hands begin to roam. Sliding up to cup her breasts. She tilts her head back to give him better access to her neck and strokes his hair. 

 

“This is nice.” Luka murmurs as his hand slips below the water to find her center. He takes her lips with his in a slow, sweet kiss while he uses his hands to pleasure and torment her. He smiles against her lips when she cries his name as the orgasm washes through her. He manages to roll them so he’s braced above her.

 

Abby grins up at him. “We might need diving equipment if you try to pull this off.” She laughs as Luka grins and lowers his mouth to hers and slips inside her. The pace is slow and steady as he moves inside her in the awkward confines of the tub. Abby shifts to meet his thrusts, beat for beat. She twines her fingers in his hair as his breath hitches and he groans, emptying himself into her. Her lips curve as she follows him over the edge. 

 

Luka smiles as he rests his head between his wife’s breasts and she strokes his back. “The water’s getting cold.”

 

Abby sighs. “I don’t care. I don’t think I can move.”

 

He lifts his head to grin at her. “You’ll turn into a giant pink wrinkle if you stay in here much longer.” Luka pushes himself up and steps out, grabbing a towel for himself and drying off. He wraps it around his waist and takes another, holding it out for her. “I think trying to lift you out of there is beyond my capabilities right now.”

 

She sighs and stands. She steps into the towel and leans against him while he wraps it around her and snuggles her in. “Big, tough, Croatian like you can’t lift his tiny wife out of the tub?”

 

He grins down at her. “You make me weak, Abby.” Luka dips his head to kiss her again, and then hitches her up into his arms so her legs wrap around his waist. “But apparently not that weak.” 

 

Abby laughs as he carries her in to bed. 

  
  
  



	38. Chapter 38

“Are you sure you don’t want me to come?” Luka flips the bacon in the pan and turns to study his wife who was sipping coffee at the table.

 

“No. You have a shift. I can handle it, Luka.” Abby sighs. “I just…”

 

Luka lowers the flame and steps over to kiss the top of her head. “You want to make sure they’re okay.”

 

She nods and grips his hand. “I know it’s stupid, but…”

 

Luka steps back to the stove after giving her hand a squeeze. He piles eggs, bacon and toast on a platter and turns to set it back on the table. “It’s not stupid. I understand it, even if I disagree with it.”

 

Abby smiles wryly at him as she starts making a plate for Joe. “Thanks.”

 

“I’ll get out as soon as I can. I already told Reed that I might have to. I’ll pick up Joe and hopefully be back by three.”

 

Abby nods as she eats. “Fine. Should we just get Chinese or something tonight? That would be easy.”

 

Luka smiles over a bite of eggs. “Sure. What time are they in?”

 

“Bus arrives at one.”

 

Luka shakes his head. “I can’t believe they took a bus all the way from Minnesota.”

 

Abby shrugs. “She still won’t fly. Eric won’t drive with her. This was the only way they could agree on to get here.”

 

He grins. “They must really want to see you.”

 

She takes his hand. “Us. Eric says he can’t wait to interrogate you over your time in the KGB.”

 

Luka narrows his eyes. “I’m not Russian.”

 

“He’s still suspicious.”

 

Luka snorts and rises to take his plate to the sink. “Well, I’ll be happy to disabuse him of his notions. Can you clear up here? I need to finish getting ready if I’m going to drop Joe off too.”

 

Abby nods and sits with her coffee while Joe finishes his breakfast. She smiles at her son while he babbles happily at her. “That’s right. When you get home today, Grandma and Uncle Eric will be here.”

 

Lord help them.

 

**********************************

 

Abby parks the car on the street outside the bus terminal. She rolls her eyes at herself as she climbs from the car. It was going to be  _ fine _ . She had missed them, really. 

 

Eric spots her first from the bench he’s sitting on with Maggie. He stands and waves. Abby grins at the sight of him. Still tall and lanky, but he looked healthy. He steps forward to hug her. “Hi. Where’s Sergei?”

 

Abby snorts as she squeezes him back. “Stop it.” She pulls back to study him. “You look great.” She turns to her mother. “Hi mom.”

 

“Abby.” Maggie steps forward to hug her daughter. “Where’s my grandson?”

 

Abby lets out a laugh. “What am I? Chopped liver?”

 

Maggie laughs and squeezes Abby again. “Of course not. You look beautiful. Happy.” Maggie studies her. She had been so worried about Abby and this move, wondering what it had all been about. But she could see now that her daughter was fine. “Is Luka working?”

 

“Yeah.” Abby turns to grab her mother’s bag. “I wanted to get you guys settled. He’s going to get Joe about three and meet us at the house. Have you had lunch?”

 

Eric pats his stomach. “Of course. You think mom could take a trip without packing enough food for a small country?”

 

Abby smirks. “Of course not. Well, let’s go then.” She starts the walk to the car. “Eric, we’ll probably have to put you on the couch if that’s okay. I don’t think you’ll fit in Joe’s bed.”

 

Her brother shrugs. “Whatever.” He looks around at the streets. “So, Boston, huh? Cool city.”

 

Abby smiles at him. “We like it. It’s enough like Chicago that it feels familiar, but it’s still different, you know?”

 

They settle in the car and Maggie chatters from the backseat while her brother rides shotgun. “So did you guys get run out of town?”

 

“Eric!” Maggie lets out a shocked exclamation.

 

“What? You know you want to know why they moved here too.”

 

Abby shakes her head. “No, we did not get run out of town. We just wanted a change. Is that so hard to believe?” Abby rolls her eyes when Eric just gives her a sidelong glance. “Look. We went through some stuff last year. Well, the year before actually. Luka and I separated for awhile.” Abby closes her eyes briefly when she feels her mother’s hand on her shoulder. She really hadn’t wanted to do this. At all.

 

“I’m so sorry Abby. I know how much you love him.”

 

Abby nods. “I do. And the separation was mostly my fault. It’s...it’s a long story. But when we got back together, we decided to make a change. So, Boston. I think we’re happier now than we’ve been in a long time.”

 

Eric looks at her. “Really?”

 

Abby pulls into the driveway and looks him dead in the eye. “Really. We both love our jobs. We have some friends here. But mostly, just being here together has been really good.”

 

Eric reaches for her hand and gives it a squeeze. “Then I’m happy for you. And I’ll stop making Russkie jokes.”

 

Abby snorts. “Thanks. He doesn’t get it anyways.” She unlocks the door and leads them in. “So this is it.”

 

Maggie steps in and takes in the house. “It’s lovely, Abby. It looks like you’ve made it a home already.”

 

Abby smiles at her mother, determined to make an effort. “Yeah, we have. Ah, I’ll show you the guest room, and the bathroom and everything. Luka and I have our own.”

 

Maggie takes her hand. “I want to see everything!” She tugs Abby along while Eric trails behind, smirking. She stops at the top of the stairs and glances down at Abby’s hand. “When did you get this?”

 

Abby is momentarily baffled, and then realizes that Maggie hadn’t seen the ring Luka had given her. “Oh, ah. Christmas. It’s an engagement-slash- mother’s ring.” Abby shrugs at Maggie’s giant grin. “It’s just Luka being his ridiculous self.”

 

“It’s amazing.” Maggie hadn’t been sure that Luka was right for Abby. She had always liked him, but didn’t understand their dynamic. Carter had always seemed like a better fit, to Maggie. But seeing Abby now, in this beautiful house, wearing that ring and looking so happy; she was absolutely sure that Luka was the right man for her little girl. “So, show us around.”

 

Abby gives them the tour and settles her mother in the guest room, where Maggie stays to freshen up and take a short nap. Abby leads Eric back downstairs. “Ah, the only bathrooms are upstairs. Sorry. But the couch is comfortable, and the kitchen is right there if you want anything.”

 

Eric grins. “This is great.” He reaches out and tugs his sister’s ponytail. “I’m glad to see you.”

 

Abby smiles at him and sits on the couch, patting the space beside her. “Same goes. You’re doing okay?”

 

Eric rolls his eyes. “Yes, Abby. I’m fine. I’m on the meds, and I’m working at the airport in Minneapolis.”

 

Abby’s surprised. “Doing what?”

 

He grins. “Gift shop.”

 

She snorts at that. “Stop it. What are you really doing?”

 

“Tech support for the ATCs. I can’t do the actual job, for now, but this is the next best thing.” He shrugs. “I like it.”

 

Abby squeezes his knee. “I’m glad.” She grins at him. “How’s your love life?”

 

Eric gives her a mock scowl. “Are you becoming one of those meddling old married ladies?”

 

“Absolutely not. I never planned on getting married again in the first damned place.”

 

Eric raises a brow at her and smirks. “But you did. And didn’t bother to invite your family.”

 

“Sorry.” Abby shrugs. “That’s Luka’s fault. He surprised me with it.”

 

“I get it. Mom didn’t, but I understood. I think she’s over it.”

 

Abby nods. “Well. We talked about doing a thing for our families. But then shit happened and it never got planned. Maybe someday.” She glances back as the door opens and Luka comes in. She rises to kiss him and take Joe. “Hi.”

 

“Hi.” He glances at the couch. “Everything good?” 

 

Abby smiles. “Yeah. Eric, come say hi.”

 

Eric rises from the couch to greet Luka. The man was still intimidating, but he obviously made Abby happy and that’s what mattered. He shakes his brother-in-law’s hand. “Hey. It’s good to see you.”

 

Luka smiles at him. “Same to you. You going to be okay on the couch?”

 

Eric rolls his eyes. “Why is everyone so worried about that? I’ve slept in worse places. I was in the military for Christ’s sake.”

 

Luka snorts and moves toward the kitchen. “Do you want something to drink?”

 

“Got a Coke?”

 

“Sure.” Luka pulls two out of the refrigerator and turns to Abby. “Where’s your mom?”

 

At the words, Maggie practically flies down the stairs. “Luka!” She throws her arms around him in a hug.

 

Abby shrugs when he smirks at her over her mother’s head. “Maggie. It’s good to see you.”

 

“The house is beautiful! Everything is so nice. Where’s Joe?” She turns to see her daughter holding her grandson and her eyes light with joy. “Let me have him!” She takes Joe and hurries to the living room with him. “Eric, get my bag. I have presents!”

 

Luka shakes his head. “Ah, I’m going to go up and change.” 

 

Abby smiles at him as he slips out. She gives it a minute. “Um. Are you guys okay for a minute? I need to talk to Luka.” Her mother waves a hand at her and her brother just rolls his eyes, so she follows her husband upstairs. She finds him pulling jeans over his hips. “Sorry. I know they’re overwhelming.”

 

Luka snorts. “It’s fine.” He leans down to kiss her. “They both seem good.” He pulls a sweater out of his dresser and pulls it over his head. 

 

Abby studies him. “Yeah. They are. I’m glad they’re here.”

 

He smiles at her. “Me too.”

 

She wraps her arms around him. “Thank you for keeping me sane.”

 

Luka pulls her closer and kisses the top of her head. “I don’t think I’m done with that yet.”

 

She laughs. “Probably not.” 

 

He gives her another squeeze and lets her go. “Well, just give a signal if you need a rescue.”

  
  
  
  
  
  
  


**Notes for the Chapter:**

> *An ATC is an Air Traffic Controller in this instance.


	39. Chapter 39

Abby comes downstairs to find Maggie, alone, paging through a magazine and sipping coffee. She had woken up to find Luka gone, and Joe missing too. She gives her mother a confused glance. “Where is everybody?”

 

“Luka and Eric took Joe to the park.” Maggie smiles. “He said to tell you the coffee’s fresh and to have some before you get pissed off.”

 

Abby grunts and heads for the pot. “I didn’t even hear him get up. I must have been out, and he must have turned off the alarm.” Abby doctors her coffee and sips before sitting down with her mom. Her brain starts to clear. “They took Joe to the park? It’s February.” 

 

Maggie laughs. “It’s a nice day. You’re having a thaw. Luka said to also tell you that it would be fine and to talk to me for awhile.”

 

Abby rolls her eyes. “Of course he did. So. How are you, mom?”

 

Maggie gives her a look. “I’m on my meds still. So is your brother.”

 

“I know. That’s not what I meant.”

 

“Things are good. I’m seeing a very nice man.”

 

Abby scowls. “I don’t need to know about it.”

 

Maggie waves a hand. “Fine. Tell me why you didn’t say anything about you and Luka having problems.” Maggie eyes her daughter over her coffee.

 

Abby sighs. “Because there was no reason for you to know about it.”

 

Maggie reaches over for her hand. “Of course there was, Abby. I could have…”

 

Abby jerks her hand free. “What? What could you have done, mom? Or did you forget about the last time I had problems in a marriage? You went off your meds and turned up  _ at my job _ and humiliated me in front of everyone. Including my current husband.”

 

Maggie looks like she’s been slapped. “Abby…”

 

“I’m sorry.” She closes her eyes. “Really. I’m sorry. I shouldn’t have thrown that in your face.”

 

Maggie looks down at her hands. “You have every right to. I’m sorry for that too.”

 

Abby sighs. “You already apologized for it.” She rises to pace. “It’s just….Luka had to go to Croatia. For a lot longer than we expected. Joe got hurt, and…” She shudders. “A lot of other stuff. I started drinking again, and I couldn’t stop. I did some really awful things. I went to work drunk, more than once. I...I cheated on Luka while I was in a blackout. I drove drunk with Joe in the car. I was an absolute _shit_ to some of my best friends. So I don’t have _any_ right to complain about your failures as a mother right now.”

 

“Oh, Abby.” Maggie rises and moves to put her arms around her daughter. Abby stiffens, and then gives in, clutching her mother and weeping.

 

“I just...I couldn’t handle it all and I broke.” She pulls back and wipes her eyes. “Luka’s not entirely blameless. He fucked up too. But it was nothing compared to what I did. The fact that he forgave me is a miracle.”

 

“He loves you.” Maggie says quietly. She tugs Abby down to sit again. “You have a disease. He understands that.”

 

Abby’s lips twitch. “He didn’t always, but he sure as hell does now.” Abby sighs. “And I think I understand better what you went through when dad left. Because he  _ couldn’t  _ understand your disease. I was afraid that was going to happen to Luka and me.”

 

“Luka’s a Doctor…” Maggie begins.

 

Abby shakes her head. “He is. A really good one. But for some reason, he’s always had this…” She waves her hand, looking for the right words. “Black and white view of addiction, I guess. He was never very sympathetic to addicts and alcoholics in the ER.” She sighs again. “And then all of a sudden, he got slapped in the face with living with one, and he wasn’t sure how to handle it.”

 

Maggie nods. “That’s changed?”

 

Abby smiles. “Yeah. It was like...throwing a switch. He’s been incredible.” She sighs. “And I knew that he’d  _ never  _ leave like Dad did. He never would have left Joe, for one thing. But for a little while, I was terrified that  _ I  _ would lose him. I’m not sure I could have survived it in one piece. Luckily, I didn’t have to find out.” 

 

“I’m so happy for that, Abby. Truly.” Maggie laughs a little. “You know? I was thinking yesterday that I had never been sure Luka was right for you.”

 

Abby cocks her head. “Really? Why?”

 

“I don’t really know. I don’t understand your dynamic, I guess. That’s not to say I didn’t like him. I always did, a lot. But he seemed like a strange match for you.”

 

Abby laughs a little. “You just liked Carter better.”

 

Maggie shakes her head. “I didn’t like him  _ better _ Abby. I just thought he was more your type.”

 

Abby rolls her eyes. “Sanctimonious, rich, Doctor? Yeah. I’d been there once before, remember?”

 

Maggie throws back her head and laughs. “Oh, Abby. John was a much better man than Richard was.”

 

“Yes, he really is.” Abby snickers. “But trust me. Luka is a  _ much  _ better match for me than Carter ever was. Luka loves me for me. Not for some idea of what I  _ could  _ be.”

 

“I can see that now.” She squeezes Abby’s hand again. “I realized yesterday, before he even came home, how happy you were. And that it was because of Luka.”

 

“It is. He makes me happier than anyone ever has. Joe caps it off.” She smiles at Maggie. “Speaking of Carter, he was just here a few months ago.”

 

Maggie lifts a brow. “Really? I thought he and Luka didn’t get along?”

 

Abby snorts. “They do now. They got close when they were in the Congo together. Sometimes I think they like each other more than me.”

 

Maggie laughs. “I doubt that.”

 

“Okay. Carter likes Luka better than me. Luka has to like me more. I have sex with him.” Abby grins.

 

Maggie grins back. “That’s a relief.” She rises and puts her hand on Abby’s shoulder. “Should we make some breakfast for the men? Nobody’s eaten yet.”

 

Abby finishes her coffee. “Sure. But you get to do most of it. Unless you want burnt eggs with shells.”

 

Maggie laughs again. “I think we’ll manage.”

 

************************************

 

“Mama! I fart with arm!” Joe comes barreling into the kitchen just ahead of Luka and Eric. He puts his hand in his armpit and proceeds to try to make noise. 

 

Abby struggles not to laugh and looks up to give her brother and her husband both a baleful glance. “Wow. Who taught you that?” Luka shrugs and grins and points to Eric.

 

Eric laughs. “What are uncles for?”

 

Abby rolls her eyes. “Exactly this.” She glances at Luka. “I’m actually surprised you haven’t taught him that already.”

 

Luka’s eyes twinkle at her and he bends to kiss her head. “I thought about it.” He sits. “You made breakfast?”

 

“Donut!” Joe does his best to climb into Abby’s lap. She picks him up. 

 

“Maggie made it.” She narrows her eyes at them. “Did you stop at the bakery?”

 

“Sprinkles, Mama!” Joe pats Abby’s cheek with sticky fingers. She glares at Luka.

 

“Busted.” He mutters.

 

Eric clears his throat. “Ah, sorry. That’s my fault. We walked by and they smelled good.” He shrugs. “It’s my duty as an uncle to teach him fart jokes and give him sugar.”

 

Abby rolls her eyes. “Maybe. Be that as it may…”

 

“Abby.” Luka is trying his best to suppress his laughter. He gives her the look he uses when he’s trying to get his way, the one she can hardly ever resist. “They were little donuts. We still have room for eggs.”

 

Abby’s lips twitch. “Right. Protein source.” She reaches out and pinches his ear with a twist, making him yelp. “You know better. And when he’s bouncing off the walls an hour from now, you’re dealing with it.”

 

Luka rubs his ear and then leans into her for a kiss. “We’ll pawn him off on your mom and sneak upstairs.” He murmurs against her mouth, making her smile.

 

“Ewwww.” Eric makes the face reserved for brotherly disgust at the sight of his sister kissing someone. “You guys are gross.”

 

Luka chuckles and rises to go to the stove. “You’re just jealous.” He grins at Eric, then smiles at Abby while he makes them plates of food. “Where’s Maggie?”

 

“She’s showering.” Abby smiles a little. “Did you guys bond?”

 

Eric shrugs. “Sergei here is okay. I promised him a ride in an airplane.”

 

Abby snorts. “No. That’s never happening.”

 

“I told him he could fly it.” Eric grins at her.

 

“Definitely never happening.” 

 

Luka shakes his head and sets plates all around. “I like to fly.”

 

Abby smirks at him. “I know. Still...never happening.”

 

He grins at her and begins to eat. “Did you decide where you want to go today?”

 

“Not yet. I figured we’d all talk about it when you guys got back. Since you snuck out of here at an unholy hour.”

 

“We didn’t sneak. You were practically comatose.”

 

Abby scowls. “I was not.”

 

“I had to check your pulse and respirations.” Luka grins. 

 

“Shut up. It was a long week. And you turned off the alarm.”

 

He shrugs. “You needed sleep. We were fine.”

 

Abby smiles. “I know that. Still.”

 

“You’re still a nag, Abby.” Eric snorts.

 

Abby rolls her eyes. “You needed to be nagged. So does he.” She gestures at her husband who is looking on in amusement.

 

“Maybe. But everyone’s happy. Be quiet.” Eric grins at her.

 

“Fine.” Abby fills her mouth with eggs.

 

*****************************

“This place is huge.” Eric walks beside Abby while Luka carries Joe, and Maggie chatters happily to him ahead of them. “Even bigger than Shedd’s.”

 

“Yeah, it’s fun. Wait for it….” She smiles when Joe squeals in delight and tries to wiggle out of Luka’s hold.

 

“Penguins, Tata!” Joe scowls when Luka chuckles and tightens his grip.

 

“We have to pay first.” Luka kisses his head.

 

“This is his favorite place in the city, so far. I figured it was still too cold for Maggie to walk around downtown and see the historical sites. Maybe when you guys come next time.” Abby smiles.

 

Eric bumps her with his elbow as they wait for Luka to pay. “Is that an invitation?”

 

Abby shrugs. “So far, so good.”

 

Eric nods as they follow Luka and Maggie again. “I’ve been meaning to…” He trails off.

 

“What?”

 

He takes a deep breath. “To say that I’m really sorry for everything that happened when I was first diagnosed.” Abby opens her mouth and he cuts her off. “Just let me get through this, okay?” At Abby’s nod, he continues. “You know what it’s like to live outside the disease. But I shouldn’t have treated you the way I did. Or anything else that I did either.”

 

“It’s okay. I love you. This is part of it.” Abby says quietly.

 

Eric puts his arm around her shoulder. “I know. But thanks. Hey, did Dad track you down?”

 

Abby stops and stares at him. “Yeah. You could say that. Have you seen him?”

 

Eric shrugs. “He came up once, a couple of years ago. I was cycling, so I kind of let him have it. That was that.”

 

Abby snorts. “No wonder.”

 

“No wonder what?”

 

“He tracked me down, yeah. But he lied about who he was. I didn’t recognize him. Why would I? He said when he finally admitted it that he chickened out. I basically told him to get fucked.”

 

Eric sighs. “We probably should have been nicer.”

 

Abby shakes her head vehemently. “No. He  _ left  _ us Eric. Without a backwards glance. We heard from him what? Three times? He left us with a crazy person…” Abby winces when Eric looks pained. She touches his arm. “I’m sorry, I didn’t mean it like that.”

 

“I know.”

 

“Anyways. Eric, you see that guy up there?” She gestures at Luka, who is crouched beside Joe, pointing out different fish in the reef tank. “Luka is the epitome of what a father  _ should  _ be. He’s not perfect, God knows. He fucks up plenty, like giving Joe donuts.” She rolls her eyes when Eric grins. “But he’s  _ there _ . He loves Joe so fiercely…” Abby shakes her head. “When we were having problems, even when I thought he was going to leave  _ me, _ I knew with every fiber of my being that he would never leave Joe. Not in a million years. That’s a father.” 

 

Eric stares at her, a little surprised at the fierceness and conviction in her words. “I guess you’re right.”

 

“I’m definitely right. I don’t need Eddie in my life. I have Luka.” She smiles at her brother. “How about you, though? Are you going to get in contact with him?”

 

Eric shakes his head and shrugs. “No point. Because you’re right. He was never my father. I barely even remember him leaving, and I wonder if that’s more about mom’s reaction. I don’t really remember anything of him living with us. I don’t need him.” He grins when Joe comes running toward them and firmly takes his hand.

 

“We go see penguins now, Unca Ric.” Joe gives Eric a pleading look.

 

Eric smiles at his sister. “I guess I have everything I need.”

 


	40. Chapter 40

“I want to thank you, Luka.” Maggie takes a sip from the bottle of water she’s nursing while chopping vegetables for a salad. She smiles when Luka gives her a puzzled glance over his shoulder. “For being so welcoming to Eric and I.”

 

He lowers the heat on the sauce he has on the stove and turns to smile at her. “We’re family, right?”

 

“Right.” She gestures with her water when he sits down at the table with her. “But after everything…” Maggie takes a deep breath. “Everything I’ve put Abby through…”

 

Luka shakes his head. “Maggie, you’re her mother. She loves you more than she’s able to say. Abby and Joe are everything to me. Why wouldn’t I want you to be a part of our lives?”

 

Maggie smiles a little. “You know? I mentioned to Abby yesterday that I wasn’t sure you were right for her.” She laughs when Luka cocks a brow and smirks at her. “That came out wrong.”

 

Luka laughs a little. “It wouldn’t be the first time I’ve heard that we’re not right for each other.”

 

She shakes her head. “What I mean is, I’ve always liked you, but I wasn’t sure you were giving Abby everything she needed.”

 

Luka nods and frowns. “I wasn’t, for awhile.”

 

Maggie shakes her head again. “I don’t think that’s true. It was my own misinterpretation of you two that made me think it. Not what I was seeing. When Joe was in the hospital, I could see how much you love her. Your support got her through that.”

 

He lifts a brow. “Yours too.”

 

She waves a hand. “I just distracted her by being my annoying self.” She smiles when he snorts. “But it was obvious then, just like it’s obvious now, that you’re perfect for each other.”

 

Luka shrugs and rises to put the pasta water on to boil. “We are. I’m not sure what that says about either one of us.” 

 

Maggie laughs. “It says she found her true love, 

and I couldn’t be happier that it’s you.” She studies him when he turns to lean on the counter. “She told me what happened last year.”

 

Luka’s mouth tightens. He hadn’t expected to have this conversation with Maggie. “Okay.”

 

“I just want to say I’m glad you forgave her. It couldn’t have been easy.”

 

“She forgave me too.” He shakes his head. “We both screwed up. But we started again and I think we’re happier now than we’ve ever been.” He says softly. 

 

“I can see that, Luka. You’ve made a beautiful home here.” 

 

Luka hesitates before asking her a question that’s been on his mind. He turns to add the pasta to the boiling water. “Have you heard from her father?”

 

Maggie’s eyes widen. “As a matter of fact, I talked to him a few months ago.”

 

He turns back again. “Does he know where Abby is?”

 

“No.” She shakes her head vehemently. “I wouldn’t tell him that. Abby asked me not to.”

 

Luka sighs. “Okay.” He squeezes Maggie’s shoulder. “She’s gone back and forth on getting in touch with him again. But it has to be her choice.”

 

Maggie nods slowly. “I regret telling him she was in Chicago.”

 

Luka waves that off. “It is what it is. But this time, she’s the one who needs to make the decision.”

 

“I know.” She smiles when Joe comes barreling  into the room.

 

“”Dinner.” He demands of Luka.

 

Abby smiles at Luka’s raised brows as she comes in, pulling off her gloves. “The only way I could get him to come in was to tell him you had dinner ready.” She slips her arms around his waist and raises her lips to his. “He’s developed quite the stubborn streak.”

 

Luka snickers into her kiss and tugs her hair. “Wonder where that came from?”

 

Abby rolls her eyes and smirks. “Both of us. We’re screwed, pal.”

 

Luka chuckles and kisses her again. “You’re right.” He smiles down at his scowling son. “Grandma made a salad. How about you eat that while I finish the rest.”

 

“Want sgetti.” Joe says stubbornly. 

 

Eric comes in and takes pity on his brother in law. “Hey Joe. Grandma puts magic in her salads.” He grins when Joe watches him suspiciously.

 

“What magic?”

 

Eric shrugs and scoops salad for himself. “Secret. You have to eat it to find out.” He narrows his eyes at his nephew. “But maybe you’re not old enough to have any.”

 

Joe looks insulted. “I’m two!”

 

“Oh. I guess you  _ are  _ old enough. Have some salad then.” He scoops some into a bowl for Joe.

 

Luka watches in amusement and then grins when his wife shrugs as if to say “It worked.” He strains the spaghetti and dumps it in a large bowl. “Everybody sit. Sgetti’s ready.”

 

******************************************

 

Abby turns from her dresser when Luka comes into the bedroom after checking on Joe. “I can’t believe it took my  _ brother _ to convince you that ‘Die Hard’ is a must see.”

 

Luka shrugs and smirks, walking to his own dresser to pull sweats out. “It was good.”

 

Abby strips her shirt off and stares at him. “I  _ know _ it’s good. I’ve been telling you it’s good for years.”

 

Luka raises a brow as he watches her strip off her bra and unbutton her jeans. His body gives a probably inappropriate response, considering that her mother was down the hall and her brother was downstairs on the couch. He grins at her. “I believed you. We just hadn’t gotten around to it.” He walks over to tug her forward and into his arms. She scowls at him.

 

“Don’t get any ideas. I’m mad at you.” 

 

“I already have the ideas.” Luka backs her up against the dresser. “And I like it when you’re mad at me like this.”

 

Abby casts her eyes to the ceiling and tries not to smile. “You’re such a jerk.” His body is pressed against hers, so she can tell that the ‘ideas’ were definitely being had. His hands were roaming up her back and over her butt, making her shiver. But she wasn’t going to make it easy for him. “If you think you’re getting sex after…” she trails off when his mouth lowers to her neck and his tongue strokes along the juncture with her shoulder.

 

“You’re not  _ really _ mad.” He nibbles his way up her neck to her ear, grinning when her breath hitches. “I can tell when you are.” He slips his hands down her hips, sliding the jeans down her legs. Stroking her smooth thighs, he slides one hand between them, finding her wet. “Somebody who’s really mad doesn’t have that response to her husband.”

 

Abby’s head falls back while he strokes her over her panties. She groans and grips his hair, pulling his mouth to hers. “Luka…” She wraps a leg around his hips, opening herself to him further. “I  _ always _ have that response to you.”

 

Luka smirks and hitches her up, crossing the room in two quick strides to dump her on the bed. He pulls his own shirt over his head and tosses it. “Keep being mad then.” 

 

Abby laughs as he sheds his own jeans and dives on top of her, making her squeal. 

 

“Shhh. You’ll wake your mom up.” He takes her mouth again, sliding those long, clever fingers back down her body.

 

“Oh, god. Did you need to remind me?” She shivers when he trails his lips over her jaw. Her body is too far gone to care if they woke the entire world.

 

“Sorry…” Luka slides down, taking her breast in his mouth while his hands continue to play over her. He moves down her body, reveling in her gasps and quiet moans. Peeling the panties over her hips, he lowers his mouth, kissing her lower belly while her hand grips his hair, guiding him where she wants him. He smiles at her strangled groan when he licks into her, using his mouth on her until she breaks.

 

Abby drags him up, rolling quick as a snake to push him to his back. He grins up at her when she straddles him, taking his hard length in hand and guiding him inside her. She leans forward to kiss him as he groans, her hips lifting and falling, setting a tortuous pace. “It’s your turn to be quiet.” She rises up and cocks a brow at him, her eyes full of mischief as she continues to move, driving him crazy. “Think you’re up for the challenge?”

 

Luka slides his hands up to cup her breasts, thumbs sliding over her nipples. “I’m definitely up.”

 

Abby smiles and licks her lips while she covers his hands with hers. “Yeah, you are.” Her breath is rushing through her lips while she quickens the pace, watching his eyes as she moves. She leans forward to kiss him again. “Go over, Luka. I want to watch you.”

 

Luka grips her hips and thrusts up into her, kissing her fiercely now. Knowing she wanted to see what she did to him makes his heart squeeze. His body takes over as his control snaps. His hands tighten on her hips, shifting her so he goes deeper. Abby’s hands slide over his chest, stroking and gripping while she rides him until he goes blind and empties himself. Her forehead drops to his as she follows him over the edge. 

 

Luka wraps his arms around her when she collapses on him. He trails a finger up and down her spine. 

 

“I’m still mad at you.” Abby mutters. 

 

He chuckles. “Why, exactly?”

 

She folds her arms on his chest and grins at him. “I don’t know, really. It’s been awhile since I was mad at you. Seemed like the thing to do.”

 

“Well, that’s reasonable.”

 

Abby snickers and rolls so she’s snuggled against him. “We need to put some clothes on.”

 

Luka continues to stroke her, content to stay where they were. “Mmm Hmm. We’ll get around to it.”

 

“I have some things I need to say to you, maybe we can talk tomorrow night.”

 

“Alright. Everything okay?” He squeezes her forearm.

 

“Yeah. Just some things I’ve needed to say for awhile. After mom and Eric leave though.” She kisses him. “I love you.”

 

“I love you right back. What else?” He smiles when she frowns at him. “How well do I know you?”

 

“Pretty fucking well.” She sighs and runs her hand over his stomach, her brow furrowed now. “What were you and Maggie talking about when we came in from our walk?”

 

“You.” He smiles when she scowls at him. “What? We talked about how she didn’t think I was good enough for you.”

 

_ “What _ ?” Abby struggles to sit up, and he tugs her back down against him.

 

“She also told me she changed her mind.”

 

Abby props herself on her elbow, since he didn’t seem inclined to let her move any farther. “She didn’t have any right to…”

 

Luka grips her hair and pulls her mouth to his in a firm kiss. “Abby. She actually said she didn’t think we were right for each other.”

 

“Still..”

 

He lifts a brow at her. “It’s not the first time either of us has heard that.”

 

She huffs out a breath and lies back down. “Not the point. And a lot more people think we  _ are _ right for each other than the ones who don’t.”

 

“Does it really matter what anyone else thinks?” Luka shifts so he’s on his side. “ _ We _ know just how right we are together. Fuck everyone else.”

 

Abby smiles. “That’s very true.” She leans in to kiss him. “I’m sorry if she…”

 

“She didn’t. We had a good talk. Everything’s fine.” He takes her hand. “She told me something else.”

 

“What?”

 

“She talked to your father.”

 

Abby’s eyes widen. “She didn’t tell him where we are, did she?”

 

Luka shakes his head. “No. I think she learned her lesson there. But I made it clear to her, again, that it had to be your choice next time.”

 

She blows out a breath and leans her head on his shoulder. “Thank you.”

 

“You’re welcome.” He smiles at her. “I’m really glad they came.”

 

Abby grins. “Me too. Even if it means we have to be quiet during sex.”

 

He rolls on top of her. “Want to try again?”

 

She pulls his mouth down to hers. “I’m up for it if you are.” Abby slides her hand down his side. “Hey look, we’re still naked.”

 

“I told you we didn’t need to get dressed yet.” Luka covers her grinning mouth with his. 

  
  
  
  
  
  
  



	41. Chapter 41

Abby comes downstairs to find her brother and her husband in the kitchen, chatting amiably while Luka mixes batter in a bowl. She grunts in thanks when Luka simply hands her a cup of coffee. She sits with Eric at the table.

 

Luka grins when he sees her eyes start to clear. “You married me because of my coffee skills, didn’t you.”

 

“It was a factor.” Abby smiles at him. “You’re a pretty good cook too.  _ And  _ you’re cute.” She purses her lips at him. 

 

He steps over to kiss the top of her head. “And I tolerate your morning grumpiness.” 

 

Eric snorts and rolls his eyes. “You guys really are disgusting. And loud.” He smirks and takes a sip of his own coffee. 

 

Abby raises a brow at him. “Excuse me?”

 

“I had to use the bathroom late last night and…”

 

Abby chokes on her coffee while Luka turns back to the stove with a blush creeping up his neck. “You...wait...you…” She sputters.

 

Eric grins at their reaction. “It’s not like I was  _ trying  _ to listen. But some things carry. Good thing mom sleeps like the dead.” 

 

Abby shakes her head. “ _ Anyways. _ ” She looks desperately at Luka. “Pancakes, huh?”

 

Luka seems to have recovered. “Uh, yeah. I thought their last meal here should be a good one. Joe wasn’t awake?”

 

“No. It’s a little early yet. I’ll get him when breakfast is ready. Mom’s not up?”

 

Eric shrugs, amused at their embarrassment and quick topic change. “She sleeps like the dead, remember? When she actually sleeps.”

 

Abby winces in sympathy. “Still that pattern huh?”

 

“I don’t stay with her too often. But when I do, yeah. She’s either wired all night, or sleeping like it’s hibernation time.”

 

“There really is no in between. I thought maybe once she leveled off with the meds, her sleep habits would change. I guess not.”

 

“It’s just how she is. It doesn’t really affect us, so we should probably just leave her alone about it.” Eric shrugs.

 

“Yeah.” Abby sighs. “I’m going to miss you both when you leave. She reaches over to take her brother’s hand. 

 

He snickers. “You’re just glad we’re normal right now.”

 

“Well, yeah. But I wouldn’t call any of us  _ normal. _ ” She rises and leans over to kiss Luka’s cheek while he ladles batter on the griddle. “I’ll get Joe.”

 

He smiles at her. “Okay. Check on your mom too. The bacon’s done. I just have to finish these and get the eggs cooked. Ten minutes.”

 

Abby nods and heads up the stairs. When she returns, ten minutes later, Luka has pancakes and bacon on a platter and was scrambling eggs at the stove. Her brother was setting the table. She scans, and after putting Joe in his booster, turns to the refrigerator for ketchup. Her brother makes a disgusted face. 

 

“You  _ still _ do that? Jesus, Abby, what are you? Twelve?”

 

Abby shrugs. “This from the guy who just taught his nephew how to fart with his arm.” 

 

“It’s not like  _ I  _ still fart with my arm. Besides, that's an important life skill.” He turns when Luka sets the eggs down. “You haven’t broken her of that habit?”

 

Luka smirks and sits. “Ketchup on her eggs is the least of her bad dietary habits. I pick my battles.”

 

Abby sticks her tongue out at them and scoops eggs onto her plate, dumping ketchup over them. She fills her mouth with them and starts making Joe a plate. 

 

Luka laughs while Eric rolls his eyes. “Real mature. Are you sure you’re older than me?”

 

Abby shrugs. “Definitely. Mom will be right down. She said to get started, so dig in.”

************************************************

At the bus station, Maggie hugs her daughter. “Thanks for having us.”

 

“Thanks for coming. Really.” She squeezes her mother hard. 

 

Luka hands Joe to Maggie and turns to shake Eric’s hand. “It was nice getting to know you a little better.”

 

“Same goes. You guys should come to Minnesota.” Eric smirks.

 

Luka laughs. “One of these days. In the meantime, get Maggie’s Skype set up will you?” He accepts Maggie’s hug when she passes Joe to Eric. “I’m glad you came.”

 

Maggie puts her hands on his cheeks and kisses him. “Thank you Luka. Take care of Abby and Joe.”

 

He smiles at her. “I will. Take care of yourselves. Both of you.” He nods and steps back, taking Joe back from Eric.

 

Abby takes his free hand and waves them off as they head toward the bus. “Want to get lunch at Papa’s?”

 

Luka squeezes her hand. “Sure.” He starts walking with her to the car. “Did you still want to talk?”

 

Abby smiles and takes Joe at the car, rising on her toes to kiss Luka. “Yeah. After Joe’s in bed. Let’s get some lunch and just hang out together this afternoon.” She turns to strap Joe in his car seat.

 

“Sounds good. We could use some relaxation time.” He grins at her as he slides behind the wheel. 

 

Abby climbs into the passenger seat. “Relaxing means relaxing. Not sexy times.” She pokes him in the ribs.

 

“Sexy times are relaxing.” He laughs when she rolls her eyes. “But that isn’t what I meant. Want to watch a movie?”

 

She smiles and takes his hand. “That sounds perfect.”

 

****************************************

 

Abby fiddles with the envelope in her hand, waiting for Luka to finish bedtime with Joe. They had spent the day watching  _ Cars _ and playing with the train set Maggie had bought for Joe while she was there. Abby smiles a little, thinking that Luka loved it almost as much as Joe did. 

 

She sets the envelope aside and goes into the kitchen for a couple of Cokes. Abby grins, thinking that it had been a really good day. Luka had managed to talk her into sexy times after all, while Joe was napping, and they’d had a short nap of their own after. She loved days like this.

 

Luka comes down the stairs just as she comes back into the living room with the drinks. He smirks. “I hope that’s the real stuff and not your diet crap.”

 

Abby shakes her head. “It’s the real stuff.” She hands him one and sits. She leans her head on his shoulder. “I want to say thanks for this weekend, first of all.”

 

Luka puts his arm around her and kisses her head. “It was nice. Your brother is pretty great.”

 

Abby smiles. “He really is. I’m glad to see him back to himself.” She sighs. “I’m not sure where to start.”

 

“Wherever you need to.”

 

“Yeah.” She scoots up so she’s facing him and takes a drink to wet her suddenly dry throat. “I need to thank you for this past year. For everything.”

 

Luka shakes his head. “Abby…”

 

“No, you just listen. I need to say this.”

 

He takes her hand. “Okay.”

 

“For a long time, as much as you loved me, you didn’t really understand a lot of things. That’s more my fault than yours. I never talked to you about them. I pushed it all aside because we were so happy together, and I didn’t want to rock the boat.”

 

Luka smiles a little and nods. “I did the same thing.”

 

“Yeah. But then things fell apart.” She shakes her head again when he opens his mouth. “Quiet. So I kept everything inside because of that, and you still didn’t get it, and it pissed me off. So I pushed and pushed until we broke. I’m more sorry for that than I can say.”

 

Luka leans in to kiss her. “I know. But we picked up the pieces, and we put them back together. I think they’re even stronger now.”

 

Abby nods. “Yeah. And a big part of that is that you figured it out. You figured  _ me  _ out. You put the effort in because you loved me enough to want to fix it. I’m so grateful for that, Luka.”

 

“I love you more than anything, Abby. Of course I wanted to fix it.” He says quietly. 

 

She nods and picks up the envelope. “I wrote this for you while I was in rehab. I actually wrote it before you came to visit me in there. I wasn’t sure I would ever give it to you.” She smiles when he stares at it. “My therapist in there wanted me to write down everything I was feeling about you, about us. What I wanted for us. And to write it as a letter to you. I read it the other day after I talked to Maggie. I want you to have it. I think we’ve managed everything I was wishing for.”

 

Luka clears his throat. “Should I read it now?” 

 

“Um. That’s up to you.” She smiles when he grips her hand and opens the letter. Abby feels her heart squeeze as she watches the emotions play over his face. One of the things she loved about him the most, and also sometimes irritated her, was how expressive his face is. She could almost always tell what he was feeling, and while that was a good thing most of the time, it wasn’t always. It was a good thing right now though.

 

Luka’s emotions are a mess as he reads her letter. She sounded almost despondent. Afraid that they would lose everything they had. His heart clutches as he remembers how close they had come to doing exactly that. There are tears in his eyes when he finally looks up at her. “Abby…”

 

“I didn’t mean to make you sad.” She says softly. 

 

“You didn’t.” Setting the letter aside, he scoots closer to her and pulls her into his arms. “I’m sorry too.” He kisses the top of her head. “Thank you for this.” Luka wraps his arms tighter when she sighs. “I’m glad you gave me this. I’m glad that we’re past all of that and that we’re here together.”

 

Abby tilts her head up and kisses him softly. “Me too.” She lets out a sigh. “I’m glad I finally got that out.” 

 

“Me too. I love you, baby.” Luka pulls back to look at her. “Ah, speaking of being past all of that, this seems like a good time for something _ I’ve _ been wanting to say.” He smiles when she tilts her head at him. “I had an idea that I ran by your brother, and he liked it.”

 

Abby cocks a brow at him. “Okay.”

 

“What do you say to finally doing a wedding sort of thing for our families this summer?”

 

Abby gapes at him. “Really?”

 

He smiles. “I told you Niko and Ana wanted to visit. Eric said he and Maggie would be happy to come back.” Luka shrugs. “Maybe Susan and Chuck, Carter and Kem. Kerry. I don’t know. The people we love who couldn’t be there for the first time.”

 

Abby stares at him and then grins. “You know Neela and Ray and Archie will be pissed if we don’t invite them too.”

 

His smile lights up. “You’ll do it?”

 

She leans in to kiss him, hard. “Of course I’ll do it. That was always the plan anyways, right?”

 

“It was. We just never got around to doing it. So you’ll marry me? Again?”

 

Abby smiles at him and strokes his cheek. “I would marry you a thousand times.”

 

Luka leans in to kiss her softly. He grins against her mouth. “Let’s go upstairs and seal this deal then. I should remind you of why you’re doing it, so you don’t panic again.”

 

She laughs and pulls him up with her. “I’m pretty sure that won’t happen again. But if it does, you’ll just talk me into it.”

 

He kisses her cheek. “I’m really good at that.”

 

Abby slips her arm around his waist. “Yeah, you are.”

  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  


**Notes for the Chapter:**

> You can read the letter in my one-shot fic “Fate and Destiny”. Enjoy!


	42. Chapter 42

“For someone who didn’t want to get married again in the first place, you’ve sure had a lot of weddings in the past few years.”

 

Abby rolls her eyes at the amusement in Neela’s tone. “Bite me.”

 

Neela laughs. “No, seriously. What brought this on?”

 

Abby swallows the last bite of her sushi that she’d picked up for lunch. “We always planned to do it. Kind of.” She can almost  _ hear _ Neela raise her brows on the other end of the phone call.

 

“ _ Really?” _

 

_ “ _ Well, yeah. Luka doing the whole surprise wedding thing left a lot of people out. Including our families. So we thought we’d do it again.” Abby rises to clear off the table in the lounge of her lunch. “It’s time.”

 

Neela laughs. “That’s sweet. Really. July you said?”

 

“I think so. We’ll probably be stopping in Chicago for the Center opening and the Pratt thing in May, on our way to Hawaii for our delayed honeymoon...no comments from the peanut gallery...so we’ll see you before that if you can’t make it.”

 

“You know I’d love to be there. I want to see your place. It just depends on…”

 

“Yeah, no worries. You’ve already watched us get married once, and you’ll be starting as an attending. Somewhere. Have you made any decisions yet?”

 

Neela sighs. “I think I broke up with Simon. It’s all very confusing right now.”

 

“I was talking about your career, but your love life is always interesting.” Abby smirks.

 

She laughs. “It is, isn’t it? It’s just...I think I want to be with Ray.”

 

“Well no shit. I could have told you that years ago.” Abby grins when she hears Neela’s huff of breath. “How does Ray feel about that?”

 

“I’m pretty sure he’s amenable.”

 

“I repeat. No shit.” Abby shifts the phone to her other ear. “Neela, you’ve been desperately in love with him forever. It’s time to suck it up. Trust me, I know about this.”

 

“No shit.” Neela responds drily, making Abby snort. “Anyways, how are Luka and Joe?”

 

“They’re great. Joe’s doing this stubborn thing that’s driving Luka crazy, but I think it’s pretty funny. It will probably get old soon.”

 

“I wonder where he gets that?”

 

“Okay. That joke’s getting old now. It’s true, but old.” She smiles and checks her watch. “Listen, I’ve got to go, my lunch is almost over. I’m actually surprised I haven’t been interrupted already.”

 

“Sure. I should get back to it too. I’m glad you called. Kiss your boys for me.”

 

“I will. Call me when you make a decision.”

 

“About what?”

 

“Anything.” Abby grins at Neela’s laugh. “Bye.” She smirks as she hangs up the phone. It was about damn time. She sends a quick text to Luka. “Neela’s thinking about being with Ray.” She snorts when he responds almost immediately with “What else is new?” 

 

Things are slow at admit, so she checks the charts. “Nothing new?”

 

“Everybody’s checked in and seen. It’s like an alternate dimension.” Jack, one of the nurses, smiles at her. “Hey, you look happy today.”

 

“Don’t I always?” Abby smirks at him. 

 

“No.” He laughs when she scowls at him. “See? That’s what I’m used to.”

 

“Very funny. I just talked to a friend from home who’s finally doing something she should have done a long time ago.”

 

“That’s nice.”

 

“It really is.” She smiles at him. “I’m going to check radiology results on the ankle in four. Anything new there?”

 

“Nope. Vitals stable. She’s just waiting on the X-ray.”

 

“Okay. Pretty sure it’s just a sprain. Clinically, there’s no indication of a fracture.” Abby picks up the chart.

 

“You can tell without a picture?” 

 

Abby smiles. “Sure. Come with me, I’ll show you.”

 

The X-Ray shows no fracture, and after walking Jack through a clinical ankle eval and differential diagnosis, she hands him the chart to discharge the patient. 

 

“That was really cool. Thanks.” He grins at her.

 

“Sure. There are pretty obvious clinical signs of fracture, and when they’re absent, X-ray isn’t always indicated. We tend to overuse radiology instead of trusting our clinical judgement.” She grins a little, thinking of her husband and his disdain for unnecessary testing.

 

“Huh. Never looked at it that way. Thanks Abby.” 

 

“Sure.” She smiles and nearly runs into Dawn when she comes out. 

 

Michaels lifts a brow. “Teaching the nurses clinical diagnosis?”

 

Abby looks sheepish. “It’s a good skill to have.”

 

Dawn laughs. “Relax, Abby. I happen to agree. Just don’t let anybody from upstairs hear you say any of that.”

 

Abby laughs. “Believe me, I know better.” She follows Dawn into the lounge for coffee. “That’s Luka’s influence anyways. The man goes to Africa and comes back a crusader.”

 

Michaels snorts. “When did he go to Africa?”

 

“Five years ago?” Abby’s brow furrows. “More like six actually. He volunteered with DWB. We weren’t together then.” She pours a cup. “He went to get away from me. Kind of. It’s a long story.”

 

Dawn lifts a brow. “You weren’t married then?”

 

“No, it was…” Abby blows out a breath. “It’s complicated. We were together, then we weren’t. I was with someone else after. I only found out recently about all of the reasons he went. He almost died over there.” She says softly.

 

“I’m sorry, Abby.” Dawn puts a hand on her arm. “I don’t mean to be nosy.”

 

“You’re not.” Abby smiles. “Anyways, the point is, when he came back, he nearly got himself fired over trying to get unnecessary testing abolished from the ER. It was both noble and irritating.”

 

“I’m sure your Chief was thrilled.” Michaels grins. 

 

“Oh God. You have absolutely no idea. Romano was...well, words fail. Let’s just say he was not a very good human being, and Luka pissed him off consistently just by existing. This sent him over the edge.”

 

“I thought your Chief was Kerry Weaver. Before your husband was, I mean.” 

 

“Another long story. It was Kerry, then she was promoted. Romano was  _ demoted  _ down with us. He was a one-armed surgeon, and boy, was he cranky about being down with us peons in the ER.”

 

Michaels stares at her. “Um...one armed surgeon?”

 

Abby laughs. “You have no idea of the stories I have from County. Anyways, after he died, Susan was interim chief for awhile. When she left, Luka took the job.”

 

“I’m starting to have a newfound respect for you. And Luka.” Michaels smiles. “Do you keep in touch with Kerry?”

 

“Yeah. Not as much as I should, but I talk to her every few months. She’s doing great.”

 

“That’s good to hear. I’ve met her a few times at conferences. She seemed like she knew her stuff.”

 

“That she did.”

 

Dawn drains her coffee. “I’m off soon. I’ll see you tomorrow.”

 

Abby finishes her shift by catching up on charts and reviewing cases with some of the students. She dials Luka as she climbs into the car.

 

“Hey.” Luka sounds rushed.

 

“Hey. I’m heading out early. I’m going to run some errands before my appointment, need anything done?”

 

“If you could find my sanity out there somewhere, that would be great.” Luka says drily.

 

“Rough day?”

 

“Yeah. How are you done early?”

 

“We were slow. Sorry.” She grins as she can imagine his eyeroll. 

 

“You didn’t get any of that pileup on the freeway?”

 

“Nope. Must have missed us. I say again, sorry.”

 

Luka laughs. “Is Dawn hiring?”

 

“No.” She laughs back at him. “I’ll see you in a couple of hours. What do you want for dinner?”

 

“I don’t care. Pick us up something. I’ll get Joe.”

 

“That’s a plan. See you.”

 

“Yeah. Hey Abby?”

 

“What?”

 

“I love you.”

 

“Hey, guess what? I love you too.” She smiles when he laughs and ends the call. 

***************************************************

“Luka asked me to marry him again.” After the requisite small talk, Abby settles back on Anders’ couch.

 

“Did he?” Anders smiles at Abby.

 

“Yeah. We had talked about doing a thing for our families at some point and then…” Abby trails off.

 

“He must feel like you two are ready for that, again, if he asked.” Anders raises a brow.

 

Abby sighs and picks at a piece of lint on her pants. “One of the best things about Luka is his optimism in the face of everything that’s happened to him. He always wants to believe the best in everything.”

 

“And you don’t?”

 

“I do  _ want _ to. But the practice of it is harder for me.” She shrugs. “I want this so much. I love him more than I can express even to him. I love our life together. But there’s always that little voice in my head telling me I’ll fuck it up.”

 

Anders raises a brow. “Abby. You’re already married. You’ve told me that in some ways you’re happier  _ now  _ than you’ve ever been. Wouldn’t this just be a lovely way to make it clear to everyone else that you’re together, and plan to stay that way?”

 

Abby smiles a little. “Yeah. I’m just being stupid.” She takes a deep breath. “He asked after I gave him a letter that I’d written while I was in rehab. When I didn’t know if we were going to be able to work things out.”

 

“Did he already know the things you told him in the letter?”

 

“He knew...what happened while I was drinking. He didn’t really know how I was feeling.”

 

“And you spelled it out.”

 

“Yeah. And I wrote the letter  _ before  _ I told him everything.” Abby rises to pace. “When I told him I had slept with someone else, he shut down. He could barely even look at me, let alone touch me or speak to me. It was different from his normal shutting down and brooding. Way different. I was used to that. This was...it was cold and almost mean. Like we didn’t even know each other anymore.”

 

Anders sighs. “That’s understandable, I suppose.”

 

“I was terrified that he was just going to say ‘fuck this’ and leave.” She shudders a little. “He finally moved out for a little while to figure things out, because he could barely stand to breathe the same air I was breathing. He made plans that didn’t include me. He quit his job and switched his career focus without even  _ talking _ to me about it for Christ’s sake!” Abby throws up her hands.”Even when we weren’t together before, he still talked to me. This was like living with a stranger. One who was intentionally ignoring me. It broke my heart because he wouldn’t even  _ try  _ to talk.” 

 

“Abby, sit down, please.” She nods when Abby perches on the edge of the couch. “Why don’t you explain to me exactly what happened.”

 

Abby twists her hands in her lap. “I started drinking after Joe got hurt on the playground. He had a head injury, and it was pretty serious. I couldn’t reach Luka in Croatia. I was hurt, and scared and  _ pissed _ . I opened a bottle of wine when I got home. I just couldn’t stop after that. I went to work drunk, I was a complete  _ shit  _ to a bunch of my friends, and I screwed another man.”

 

“And what were the circumstances of that?”

 

“A party for some colleagues. I was drunk when I got there. The guy who took over for Luka had been flirty with me, and he offered me a ride home. I….I honestly don’t remember most of it. Until I woke up, naked, in his bed.”

 

Anders’ face is a picture of sympathy. “So you didn’t make a choice to cheat. You weren’t out there looking to have an affair.”

 

Abby sighs. “No, but it still happened.”

 

“But it wasn’t an affair. It was a blackout. It was out of your control and you weren’t in your right mind.” 

 

Abby swallows hard. “Yeah. That’s what Luka said the last time we talked about it. He refuses to even discuss it anymore. We had a huge fight about it. He says it hurts too much to keep dragging it up and it makes him feel like I don’t believe he’s forgiven me.” 

 

Anders sits back and crosses her legs. “Okay, Abby. Does he ever make you feel like he’s holding onto it? Like he doesn’t trust you or that he’s still angry about it? Like he hasn’t forgiven you?” 

 

“No. Never, actually. He hasn’t since we got back together.” Her brow furrows and she sighs. “I guess I’m the one who’s holding onto it.” Abby shakes her head. “I’m still so ashamed of it, and I  _ do  _ still worry that it bothers him. I just don’t want to get blindsided if it becomes an issue again someday”

 

“That’s understandable as well. And if he does eventually tell you it still bothers him, then cross that bridge when you come to it. But here’s the thing, Abby. You  _ have _ to let it go. Luka has obviously forgiven you, you need to forgive yourself. That’s part of the recovery process, right?”

 

“Yeah.”

 

“Then work on it. Part of that is re-marrying the man you love.” Anders raises a brow. 

 

Abby laughs. “I guess. I’m happy and excited about it, really. I guess I just needed to vent all of it out. I don’t think I could go through something like that again. Losing him would break me this time.”

 

“I don’t think so. But I also don’t think you need to worry about it. The two of you have made tremendous progress since you started coming.”

 

Abby blows out a breath. “Yeah, I suppose we have.”

*****************************************

Abby carries the dry cleaning and a pizza into the house. “Luka?”

 

“In here.”

 

She lays the clothes on the bannister and wanders into the living room to find her boys sacked out on the couch, watching basketball. 

 

“Bulls and Celtics.” Luka grins at her. “Am I supposed to change who I root for now?”

 

“Not if you want to keep the peace around here. We’re Bulls fans for life, pal.” She sits the pizza on the coffee table and drops down beside him. “Hi.” Abby leans over to give him a very chaste kiss on the cheek.

 

“What kind of welcome home kiss is that?” Luka complains.

 

She giggles when Joe climbs over Luka to give her a hug. She kisses his head. “Those are from Neela. I know there was a time that she would have liked to kiss you like I do, but now she thinks of you more like a big brother. It would be weird.”

 

Luka grins at her. “Okay. As long as you kiss me like you do later.” He rubs her thigh. “She’s doing okay?”

 

“Sounds like it. She finally dumped Brenner and she’s actually thinking about being with Ray. It’s progress.”

 

Joe pats her on the cheek. “Pizza, Mama.”

 

She smiles at him. “Sure. Let’s eat.” Abby sits Joe on the floor and rises, pulling Luka to his feet. “I got you onions.”

 

Luka pulls her in while Joe races ahead to the kitchen. “It must be true love. Maybe you should kiss me like you kiss me  _ now.”  _ He murmurs and dips his head.

 

Abby sighs into his kiss, lifting her hands to thread through his hair. “It must be.” She smiles at him when they break apart. “Because I’ll definitely be kissing you like I kiss you again later.” She grins when he laughs and tugs her toward the kitchen. 

  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  



	43. Chapter 43

Abby finds Luka brushing his teeth. She slides her arms around his waist and leans her head on his back. “It  _ is _ true love, isn’t it.”

 

Luka spits and grins at her in the mirror. “Hearts and flowers, every day.”

 

She gives him a squeeze. “I need to pee. Clear out.”

 

Luka laughs. “See? So romantic.” He leans down to kiss her quick and hard, and walks out. 

 

Abby finds him in bed with a book when she comes out. She raises a brow at his bare chest. “Are you naked?”

 

He grins. “Why don’t you come find out?” He pats the bed beside him.

 

Abby shakes her head as she heads to her dresser to drag on a nightshirt. She laughs as his face falls. “I’m cold. And you know I don’t sleep well naked.”

 

Luka cocks his head as she slides into bed with him. “I could warm you up..” He tugs her over beside him.

 

“We’ll get to that.” She shakes her head when he grins at her. Abby reaches a hand up and strokes his cheek. “I love you, Luka.”

 

He catches her hand and presses a kiss to her palm. “I love you, too.” Luka puts his hormones in check for the moment. “How was your session?”

 

Abby sighs, unsure what to tell him. She hated to ruin his good mood. “It was okay. I vented some things that I guess I’ve been hanging on to. It helped.”

 

“Things about us?” Luka wraps his arm around her and strokes her hip.

 

“Yeah. But it’s done now, and I realized that I was hanging onto those things mostly to punish myself. You haven’t given me any reason for it.”

 

Luka just nods. He has a feeling he knows what it’s about. “The idea of renewing our vows freaks you out.”

 

Abby shakes her head. “It doesn’t. Not really. It just hit me all at once how badly I screwed things up…”

 

“Abby…”

 

“I  _ know _ Luka. Okay? I know it’s stupid.” She sits up so she can look at him. “I just...I remembered sabotaging things so quickly last time, and I don’t want to do it again.”

 

Luka watches her steadily. “You won’t.  _ We _ won’t.”

 

“Luka, have you really thought about everything we’ve been through together? The amount of drama and moments of high terror in our relationship is a lot more than most couples.”

 

“You mean multiple near-death experiences, nearly losing Joe, being separated for so long, your relapse, my identity crisis, etcetera?” He smiles wryly at her.

 

“Yeah. Add in everything that happened when we weren’t even together...the assault, the kidnapping, your  _ other _ crisis, Africa, my family...it’s just, it’s a lot.” She shrugs. “How many chances do we get?”

 

Luka sits up and takes her face in his hands. “We get as many chances as we decide to take. And Abby? I know this with everything in me. We belong together. You’re the one for me, and I’m the one for you.”

 

Abby laughs a little. “Did you just paraphrase Jewel?”

 

Luka laughs softly and leans his forehead on hers. “Maybe, but the point is true. I love you, and you love me. We’re going to make it forever, that I know.”

 

She smiles, remembering him saying something similar on their wedding day. “I know. But you should be used to my neuroses by now.”

 

Luka’s eyes twinkle at her. “I am.” He strokes his hand over her hair. “Abby, after everything, I’m still here.  _ We’re _ still here. I love you more every day.” He nudges her gently down and lowers his mouth to hers. “I want you more every day, moja ljubavi.”

 

Abby sighs and wraps her arms around him, smiling as his lips roam to the curve of her jaw. She strokes his bare back, gasping a little as his hands begin to roam. “Luka…”

 

“Abby,” he whispers, “let me love you.” Luka slides her shirt over her head and trails his lips over her shoulder. “Let me have you.” He slides his hand down to her waist, stroking as he lifts his head to look in her eyes, his other hand trailing along the side of her breast. 

 

Abby lifts her mouth to his, arching against him as her tongue slides in to tangle with his. She relishes in his groan as he moves his hand between her naked thighs to cup her, finding her wet and ready for him. 

 

Luka smiles against her lips. “Go up, draga. Slide over.” He plays his clever fingers against her and inside her, moaning along with her when she comes. 

 

Abby’s hands slide limply off his back and she takes his, smiling as he slips inside her. The pace is slow and steady as he thrusts, taking her lips again as he moves. The air seems to thicken as her hips rise and fall, matching him, making it feel as if they were the only two people in the world. She lifts her hand to stroke the hair at the base of his neck, making him shiver as he lowers his forehead to hers, and they slide over the edge together.

 

They lay wrapped in each other after. Abby lifts her head. “Can I have my shirt back?”

 

Luka smirks at her. “Sure. If you’re still cold.”

 

She pinches his butt. “I’m not. But I will be. Will you get it? I’m not the one with a habit of tossing clothes halfway across the room.”

 

Luka snickers at her and kisses her soundly. “You should be used to it.”

 

Abby rolls her eyes. “I am. That doesn’t make it less annoying.” 

 

He grins and sits up, looking around. Luckily, the shirt hadn’t made it too far away. Luka leans over to retrieve it, and turns to yank it over her head. “There. Better?”

 

Abby shoots her arms through the sleeves and smiles at him. “Yes.” She snuggles back down against him. “Thank you for everything you said.”

 

“I meant every word.” He kisses the top of her head as his hand strokes her arm.

 

“I know. I’m really lucky, you know that?” Abby closes her eyes.

 

Luka tightens his grip on her and sighs, closing his own eyes. “Me too.”

 

*********************************************

Luka wanders into the lounge for coffee. He turns from the pot to lean on the counter when he spots Allie at one of the tables. He leans over to see what she’s reading. “Netter?” He smiles at her.

 

“Yeah. I’ve been kind of living with it.” Allie smiles up at him and takes a hit of coffee. “Abby said to get a copy and start studying.”

 

Luka nods and sits down with her. “That’s good advice.”

 

“I never really realized how surface our A and P is in nursing school. This is a  _ lot _ more than I ever thought there was to know.”

 

“Nurses don’t need to know what doctors do. But they also know things that we don’t.” Luka grins, thinking of Abby and how she had always driven that point home with him and everyone else.

 

Allie cocks her head. “Like  _ what? _ ”

 

Luka shakes his head. “Nurses are better at the wellness and care side of things. You guys get to spend more time with patients than doctors do. They tell you things that they don’t tell us, so you catch things we might miss. And most nurses take a better set of vitals than just about any doc I know. Except for maybe Abby.” He chuckles.

 

Allie grins. “Goes without saying.”

 

“Yeah. She’s one of the best doctors I know, partly because she was a nurse first, and she understands both sides of things. You’ll be great too.”

 

Allie snorts. “Sure. But first I need to actually get into Med School.”

 

Luka rises and pats her shoulder. “My dollar is on you.”

 

“What?”

 

“Nothing.” Luka grins and walks out, finding Gorsch at admit. “Dead in here today.”

 

“Don’t jinx us Kovač.” Marcus grins at him. “Allie still in there reading Netter?”

 

“Yeah.”

 

“Good for her. I don’t know why she wants to be a doc. She’s a great nurse.”

 

Luka raises a brow. “The pay, the respect, the achievement?”

 

“The hours, the politics, the stress?”

 

Luka chuckles. “Sure, because nurses don’t already have those things.”

 

Marcus shrugs. “True. At least they don’t get sued for malpractice.”

 

Luka grumbles. “That’s a bonus.” He looks over as Daniels steps up. 

 

“Want to cut loose early?” He lifts a brow at Luka. 

 

“Why not? Let me finish up with the last few on my rack and I’ll skip.”

 

An hour later Luka dials Abby as he walks to his car. He grins when she answers. “Hey. It’s me getting out early today. Want me to get Joe?”

 

“Sure. I want to hit a meeting on the way home. Will you get dinner too?”

 

Luka smiles. “Yeah. Anything in particular that you want?”

 

Abby laughs. “That’s a loaded question. But no. Surprise me.”

 

“Okay. See you in a few hours.”

 

Luka hangs up and heads for the daycare where he collects Joe. He straps him in his car seat and gets back behind the wheel. “Want to go to the store?”

 

“Candy?” Joe watches Luka slyly.

 

“If you’re good. And stop mentioning it to mama.”

 

Joe giggles. “We get mama candy too.”

 

Luka laughs. He’d never considered  _ that _ approach. “Okay, deal.”

 

Luka is examining the mixed greens in produce when a rather obvious brunette sidles up beside him, a little too close. “Looks good.” Her red lips curve up as he shifts to glance down at her.

 

“Ah, yeah. Making a salad.” Luka grips the cart handle and tosses a bundle in, wanting to move over to the tomatoes. 

 

She shifts to block him. “Hmm. Dinner for two?” She smiles at Joe. “I’m Gretchen, by the way.”

 

Luka ignores that. “Dinner for three. My wife’s still at work.” He replies shortly.

 

She lifts a sculpted brow. “You do the cooking? That’s...sweet.”

 

Luka maneuvers the cart around her. “I like to cook. Excuse me.”

 

“Sure. Hope to see you again.” She glides away, with one long look over her shoulder.

 

Luka glances at Joe, who he would  _ swear _ was judging him with the grinning look on his face. “Budi tiho. Nisam ništa učinio.” He mutters at his son, who laughs. Luka can’t help but grin at him.

 

What the hell? He was used to women hitting on him, but since Abby, it was usually more subtle. Like he gave off a “taken” vibe or something. And well? He was wearing a wedding ring. This was almost...predatory. He’d certainly been around women like that before, had even...dated was the best word…a few of them. But Jesus. 

 

Shaking his head, Luka selects his tomatoes and grins at Joe again. “Should we go find mama a big bar of chocolate?”

 

Joe giggles. “Candy for mama. Tata love mama.”

 

Luka bends down to kiss his head. “That’s right. Tata loves Joe too.”

 

Luka has Joe by the hand and is pulling the bags from the backseat when Abby pulls in behind him. She grins when Joe tugs on his father. “Mama!”

 

She pulls off her sunglasses and lifts Joe when he manages to escape Luka to run to her. “Hi buddy.” Abby smiles at Luka. “Hello.”

 

He grins and leans down to kiss her. “Hi. Good timing.”

 

Abby smirks as she carries Joe toward the house. “Not really. I wanted a hot meal on the table when I got here.”

 

Luka snorts. “Don’t worry. It won’t take long.”

 

Abby sits Joe down with his trucks and shrugs out of her coat, following Luka to the kitchen. She hops up to sit on the counter while he unloads groceries. “Joe has candy breath.”

 

Luka pulls something from one of the bags, and slides over to stand between her thighs, gripping her hips. He leans in to kiss her, making her forget she was scolding him. He hands her the candy bar. 

 

“You think you can get around me with chocolate?”

 

He nuzzles her neck. “It’s Belgian Chocolate.”

 

Abby laughs. “Okay. You’re forgiven.” She watches as he chuckles and goes back to the bags.

 

“It was Joe’s idea. I told him to stop, how do you say it?” Luka’s brow creases. “Ratting me out, and he said we should buy you some candy too.” 

 

“Smart kid we’ve got.”

 

“He is.” Luka scowls when he pulls something from the bag. “For Christ’s sake.”

 

“What?”

 

He rolls his eyes. “Nothing.” Luka crumples the piece of paper in his hand. 

 

Abby’s too quick for him, and hops off the counter to pry his hand open. She smooths the small sheet of paper out, lifts a brow. “Gretchen?”

 

Luka shrugs and shifts his weight, looking uncomfortable. “She hit on me in produce. Your son was judging me, by the way.”

 

“Good.” Abby does her best to hold back her grin. He looked so damned cute and flustered.

 

“She must have dropped this in the bag when I passed her on the way out.” He glances at her out of the corner of his eye, trying to gauge her reaction as he pulls out a pot to boil pasta.

 

“Hmmm.” Deciding to mess with him, she puts her hands on her hips. “You didn’t notice? Seriously? That’s pathetic, even for you.”

 

“No. I was doing my best to ignore her.” He fills the pot with water, sets it on the stove. Luka turns. “Abby…” He narrows his eyes when he sees her face. “You’re fucking with me.”

 

Abby bursts out laughing and moves over to hug him. “You should have seen your face.”

 

Luka smirks. “Zajebi se.” 

 

Abby rises on her toes to kiss him. “I’d rather you did that for me.” She squeezes his arms when he laughs at that. “Seriously, you dumbass. When have you ever seen me get mad about something like this?”

 

Luka shrugs and starts sautéeing garlic in butter for the Alfredo sauce he was making. “Never. But it was a really weird situation. It freaked me out a little.”

 

Abby hops back up on the counter beside him. “Aww.” She leans over to kiss his cheek. “Poor baby.”

 

“Shut up.”

 

She grins. “Italian, huh? I don’t think you’ve ever made this before.”

 

“I’ve made it. It’s just been awhile.” He pats her cheek. “This is almost done. Better get Joe.”

 

“Already?”

 

“Told you.”

 

Abby slides off the counter again. “Okay. Luka?”

 

“Yeah?”

 

“Thanks for being freaked out.”

 

Luka smiles as he watches her go. 

 


	44. Chapter 44

Abby reaches for the phone while she sits watching Joe and Luka play trains. “Hello?”

 

“Bok sestro!” 

 

Abby grins. “Hi Niko. Did you want to talk to Luka?”

 

“Eventually. How are  _ you _ ?” 

 

“I’m fine. Your brother’s a pain in the ass, but what else is new?” Luka looks up at her and rolls his eyes. She flutters her lashes at him.

 

Niko gives his big laugh. “You love that about him, yeah?”

 

Abby smiles. “Yeah, I do. How are Ana and the boys?”

 

“Oh, you know. Ana is keeping us all in line. The boys are little shits.”

 

Abby laughs at that. “Something to look forward to with Joe.”

 

“Count on it. I hope you keep him and Luka in line too. Hey, are you going to be okay with us all visiting in a few months?”

 

“Of course I am. Looking forward to it, actually.”

 

“Good. We’re all excited. I just wanted to make sure with  _ you. _ Luka’s a fucking liar and might tell me anything.”

 

Abby snorts. “He  _ is  _ a peacekeeper. But really, it will be great. I know Joe misses all of you.”

 

“We miss him too. Ivan has decided he needs to teach him football.”

 

“He might need to fight with his uncle for that spot, but okay.” She smiles down at her boys. “I’ll let you talk to him now.”

 

Niko gives a heavy sigh. “Fine. Pawn me off on my annoying little brother.”

 

Abby laughs and hands Luka the phone. She grins when Luka takes it and mutters “Odjebi.”

 

She climbs down and takes Luka’s place with the trains. 

 

Joe scowls. “Mama no play trains. Want Tata.”

 

“Sorry.” Abby shrugs. “Daddy’s talking to uncle Niko. So you get me, buddy.”

 

Joe glances over to where his father is speaking in rapid Croatian and laughing with his brother. “We go on airplane?”

 

Abby smiles. “Not anytime soon. Uncle Niko and Aunt Ana are going to visit here in a few months.”

 

“Rođaci?”

 

Luka glances over when Abby looks confused. He smiles and mouths “Cousins.” 

 

“Oh, yeah. Your cousins too.” 

 

“Marina?”

 

“Who?”

 

“Tata friend.” Joe continues pushing the buttons to move the trains on the track while Abby looks stunned. 

 

Luka squeezes her shoulder and shakes his head. Abby feels her stomach drop and just closes her eyes.

 

Luka hurries to end the call with Niko, and slides down next to Abby, taking her hand. “Marina is Ana’s cousin.”

 

“Okay.” Abby looks away from him.

 

Luka sighs and cups a hand on her jaw, bringing her eyes back to his. “They’re close. She spent a lot of time with us while…”

 

“While I was in rehab.” Abby says quietly.

 

“Abby, I’ve known her since I was sixteen. She’s nothing but a friend. She’s family.” 

 

Abby nods and flexes her hand in his. “Sure.” She gets to her feet. “I need a walk.”

 

Luka lets her go, internally cursing himself for never mentioning Marina to Abby. She  _ had _ spent a lot of time with himself and Joe. Luka had used her as a bit of a sounding board in all of his confusion and pain over what was happening with Abby. He should have realized that Joe might bring her up, as he just had. Luka sighs and rubs his hand over Joe’s hair. “Tata’s stupid, buddy.”

 

Joe looks at him and climbs into Luka’s lap to hug him. “Mama sad?”

 

“Yeah. How about you get up on the couch and read your book while I talk to mama?  We’ll have dinner in a little while.”

 

Joe pats Luka’s face. “Okay.” Luka grins at how amenable Joe is when he wants to be. 

 

Luka rises and walks to the dining room, looking out the porch door. He’s not surprised to see his wife leaning on the railing, smoking. He steps out and walks to her, laying a hand over hers. “I’m sorry.”

 

Abby nods and takes another drag. “I don’t have any right to be upset.”

 

“Of course you do.” Luka says carefully. “I realize that by never mentioning her, I made it into a big deal.”

 

Abby cuts him off. “Luka, it’s fine.” She continues smoking.

 

Luka’s temper rises. “Don’t. Don’t you do this.”

 

Abby narrows her eyes at him and crushes out her cigarette. “Don’t do  _ what _ exactly?”

 

“Don’t close down and pull away from me.” He takes her shoulders and shakes her a little. “Don’t tell me everything is  _ fine _ when it’s obviously  _ not  _ fine.”

 

Abby jerks away from him and peeks in the open doorway, checking on Joe. “Luka, if you took  _ comfort _ from another woman while you were there with  _ my _ son, spent time with her, and...whatever...there’s nothing I can do about it, is there? Just let me process it.”

 

Luka sets his hands on his hips and glares at her. “Is that what you think it was?”

 

She shrugs. “How much time did you spend with her before you came home? Before you even knew about anything that  _ I _ had done?” Abby fires at him.

 

Luka looks like she had slapped him. “Are you fucking  _ kidding _ me?” His voice spikes up and he strides to the railing, leaning his hands on it and trying to calm himself down. “You really think that being separated from you and Joe wasn’t hard for me? That I would be screwing around with someone else while my  _ family _ was thousands of miles away? Do you  _ still _ not understand how much I love and need you?” He takes a deep breath and turns. “Abby, I haven’t even  _ thought _ about touching another woman since we started again. I couldn’t.”

 

He nearly growls in frustration when Abby opens her mouth to speak, and closes it again. “Don’t you fucking  _ dare _ say you would deserve it if I had. I can see the thought in your eyes.” 

 

“Luka…”

 

“No. I’m not going to let you compare it.” He snarls at her, knowing they were wading onto boggy ground. “It’s absolute  _ bullshit _ if you think I would punish you that way. That I would be that petty and cruel.” 

 

She shakes her head. “When you came to see me in rehab, you told me how good it was to be there, just you and Joe, with your family. How happy you were. Without me.” Abby says quietly. “That comment broke my heart, Luka. And now I know…”

 

Luka closes his eyes and sighs. “Abby, I was hurt and confused and angry. You wouldn’t talk to me. It wasn’t that I didn’t  _ want _ you with us. I just didn’t know how to handle things.”

 

Abby nods and pulls another cigarette out of her dwindling pack. “I know. It doesn’t change the fact that I thought you didn’t want me anymore. I even thought…” She trails off and turns away, lighting the cigarette.

 

“What?” Luka moves forward to put his hand on her back. 

 

Her voice hitches. “I thought, for a minute, that you might take Joe and move back there. Leave me alone.” 

 

Luka is stunned by that admission. He turns her to face him. “I  _ never  _ would have done that. You should know that. Even then, you should have fucking  _ known _ that. You’re his mother and I never would have taken him from you.”

 

She smiles a little. “I do know. But things were so confusing. So up in the air. We kept avoiding each other and I just…” She draws on her smoke. “I’m sorry for even thinking it, Luka. But you should know that comment is part of what kept me from coming to Croatia right away after I left the rehab.”

 

He sighs and takes the cigarette from her, drawing deep. “I’m sorry.” He hands her smoke back and drops down in one of their porch chairs, rubbing his hands over his face. “Will you sit down?”

 

“I need to stand.”

 

“Fine. First of all, I’m really sorry for making you feel that way. Then  _ and _ now. I was stupid for not mentioning Marina’s name.”

 

“It feels like a deliberate omission, Luka. Like you were trying to hide it from me.”

 

“I know. I wasn’t. It just wasn’t important enough for me to mention. I talked to her because she’s easy to talk to. She knew me when I was married to Danielja, so it was natural to vent to her.” He smiles a little. “For what it’s worth, she told me I was being a fucking idiot, and I was obviously crazy about you, so to go get you back.”

 

Abby’s lips curve. “Really?”

 

He gives her a tentative smile. “Yeah. There was never anything between us but friendship, Abby. I’ve known her for more than half my life. She’s my sister’s cousin and best friend. She was friends with Danielja. She spent time with Joe because they hit it on.”

 

Abby snorts. “Hit it off.” She sits next to him and smiles when he takes her hand. “It’s just hard knowing that another woman was spending time with you guys when I couldn’t.”

 

He wraps his arm around her. “I get it. But you don’t have any reason to be jealous.”

 

Abby shakes her head. “It wasn’t jealousy, Luka. It was fear.”

 

“Fear?” He strokes a hand down her arm.

 

“Yeah. Fear that she might have been better for you. And Joe.”

 

Luka sighs deeply, cursing himself again. He tips her head back and kisses her, slow and deep. “Nobody could  _ ever _ be better for us than you. You need to start believing that, Abby.” 

 

She tips her head to his shoulder. “I do, most of the time. Thank you for reminding me.”

 

“You’re welcome. Are we okay now?”

 

“I think so.”

 

“Good. Abby, I want you to remember how much I love you. We wouldn’t be here if I didn’t. Other women don’t hold a candle to you. They never did.”

 

Abby turns to wrap her arms around his waist. “I love you so much.”

 

He kisses the top of her head. “Good. Now we need to go in so you can reassure your boy. He’s worried about you.”

 

Abby nods and rises, pulling him to his feet. “So is she pretty?”

 

“Not nearly as pretty as you.” Luka squeezes her hand.

 

She smiles. “Good answer.” 

************************************************

 

Abby walks into the coffee shop to find Karen sitting in one of the over-stuffed chairs with her eyes closed. She orders a black coffee and walks over, kicking her sponsor’s foot. “Hey. Wake up.”

 

Karen opens her eyes and grins. “Fuck off. I’ve had my granddaughter for the last two nights.”

 

Abby snorts. “How many times did you watch  _ The Little Mermaid? _ ”

 

“Lost count.” Karen eyes Abby while she stretches. “You look good.”

 

Abby shrugs. “Feel good. Luka and I had a big fight yesterday and he brought me breakfast in bed this morning. I think he’s still feeling guilty.”

 

“What did he do?”

 

“Let our toddler rat him out for hanging out with other women.”

 

Karen’s eyes pop wide.  _ “What _ ?”

 

Abby laughs. “It was basically a misunderstanding exacerbated by my insecurities and neuroses. But still. He  _ should _ feel guilty.”

 

“From what I’ve seen, he’s nuts about you.”

 

“He is.” Abby sighs. “This was a friend of the family while he was back home in Croatia. I didn’t like the idea that he was hanging out with her when I couldn’t be there. And worse, letting  _ Joe _ hang out with her.” Abby rolls her eyes. 

 

“That’s completely understandable.” Karen eyes her and does her job. “Any urge to drink?”

 

Abby shakes her head. “No. I smoked four cigarettes, but I didn’t want a drink. That’s what put him in the position to spend time with her in the first damn place. All of this was while I was in rehab.”

 

“Are you worried about it?”

 

“Not anymore. She’s my sister-in-law’s cousin and BFF, apparently. If Luka had even had thoughts in that direction, Ana would have throat-punched him anyways. For both me  _ and _ this Marina.”

 

Karen laughs at that. “I really don’t think you have anything to worry about. I’m still wondering how I can get a husband just like yours.”

 

“What would Harry say to that?” 

 

“He’d appreciate the break.” She smiles when Abby snickers at that. “Has Luka ever given you reason to worry about fidelity?”

 

Abby shakes her head and sighs. “No. I’m probably projecting my nonsense on him. He has women hit on him all the time. Sometimes right in my face.” She shrugs. “He rarely even notices. When he does, he’s embarrassed or amused.” Abby frowns. “Come to think of it, he usually just thinks it’s funny when  _ I  _ get hit on.” Something loosens in her chest. “It really is a non-issue again.”

 

Karen smiles at her. “Did you just figure that out?”

 

“I guess I’ve been so focused on earning his trust back that I didn’t really realize that I already had it.” She laughs a little. “He got hit on at the grocery store with Joe the other day. It completely freaked him out, so he bought me chocolate.”

 

Karen hoots with laughter. “Seriously?”

 

Abby grins. “Well, that was part of it. The other part was to bribe me so I wouldn’t scold him for letting Joe have some.” 

 

“That’s...adorable.”

 

“Yeah. He’s got adorable down to a science.” She laughs. “This woman dropped her number in one of the grocery bags. He was so desperate to ignore her he didn’t even notice. He got all sputtery and flustered when he found the number.” Abby’s lips curve. “He really is too damn cute for words.”

 

“You should go home, and tell him exactly that.”

 

“You’re right.” Abby finishes her coffee. “I’m going to hit a meeting, then head home. Do you need anything else from me?”

 

“Nah. I’m going to stay here for a little longer in the quiet. You go on. Abby? You’re doing great.”

 

Abby smiles at her. “Thanks.”


	45. Chapter 45

Abby walks in to find a note on the table in the foyer. “Working out” is all it says, in Luka’s precise printing. She smiles and sheds her jacket, wandering toward the basement where they’d set up a small home gym. 

 

Abby finds him sitting on his weight bench doing biceps curls with The Clash playing on the stereo. Sweat was dripping from his hair, and his skin glistened. He was wearing shorts and nothing else. Her belly curls with desire. 

 

She walks around the bench so he can see her. Luka looks up and smiles at her, continuing his curls. “Hi. How was your meeting?”

 

“Good. Where’s Joe?” 

 

“Napping. The monitor is on. I just wanted to get a workout in.” He sets the weights aside and grins up at her when she steps between his legs. “What are you up to?”

 

“I’m supposed to tell you that I find you very cute.” She trails her fingers over his bare shoulder.

 

Luka grips her hips. “Is that so?” He can see the lust in her eyes, and immediately goes hard. He hooks a finger in the hem of her sweatshirt and tugs her even closer.

 

“Hmm.” Abby straddles his lap, wrapping her arms around him. “It’s sponsor recommended.”

 

Luka slides his lips against hers. “You should always listen to your sponsor.” He drags her hair back and plunders her mouth with his, ripping a groan from her. “We should go upstairs.” 

 

“Why?” Abby slides her lips up, doing that thing she does with her tongue to his ear, while she wiggles in his lap. His eyes all but cross. “What’s wrong with here?”

 

Luka winces a little. “Abby, I’m all sweaty.”

 

She grins at him. “I know.” Abby slides back and off his lap, lowering to her knees on the matted floor in front of him. “Being sweaty is the very reason you’re about to get lucky.” She lifts her shirt over her head and off. 

 

Luka sucks in a breath when she slides his shorts down to free him, taking his hard length in her mouth. He strokes her hair and shoulders while she works him with lips and tongue, panting as he fights to keep control of himself. 

 

Abby slides her hands over his thighs, replacing her mouth with her hand while she moves back up to straddle him again. Luka nearly whines when she sucks his bottom lip, her hand still stroking him. “You’re mine, Luka.”

 

He pulls her head back, looking into her clouded eyes. “Christ, I love you.” Luka takes her mouth again in a deep kiss. Tongues and lips clashing as he fights to get her pants off. Abby laughs breathlessly when he slides them both to the floor, ripping at her clothes. He frees her breasts from her bra, and groaning, takes her breast in his mouth while his hand strokes the other.

 

Abby drops her head back, wallowing in the sensation of being  _ taken _ by her husband. “Luka.” She gasps when he slides his hand between her naked thighs, desperate to find her center. The light touch of his fingers sends her shooting over the edge. She cries his name as she comes.

 

Luka shoves her thighs apart and drives himself into her. She’s wet and hot and perfect. His mouth is on hers again, almost burning as he thrusts hard and deep. The rhythm fast and frantic as he moves.

 

Desperate for more of him, Abby wraps her legs around his hips, straining to meet his thrusts. Her system is overwhelmed with love and lust and trust all tangled together in the miracle that was this man. 

 

Luka quickens the pace, lowering his forehead to hers. “Abby. You’re mine too.” His everything. He smiles and takes her lips again as she groans, the orgasm coming hard. He buries himself deep and empties himself inside her.

 

Abby’s hands drop to the mat when he collapses on her. “I think I broke something.”

 

Luka chuckles and nuzzles her neck. “Now we’re both sweaty.” 

 

Abby sighs and wraps her arms around him. “Yeah.” She pinches his butt. “Getting sweatier. Move, you’re heavy.”

 

Luka laughs and rolls off from her, pulling her up to sit with him. He leans his forehead on hers. “Thanks for that.”

 

She grins at him. “I rocked your world.”

 

He chuckles at that and leans in to kiss her. “You did. I rocked yours right back.” Luka runs a hand over her hair. “Now we need a shower.”

 

Abby nods when he pushes to his feet and pulls her up. “We do. We’re pretty gross.” She glances down. “We should probably put our clothes back on though. I don’t think Joe’s awake. But just in case.”

 

Luka snickers. “You’re such a Mom.”

 

She rolls her eyes while she hitches her jeans up and grabs her sweatshirt. “So?”

 

“Nothing.” Luka takes her hand to pull her upstairs. 

 

********************************************

Luka watches as Abby scoops Joe out of his booster so he can wash his hands. When they’re finished, she sets him down and pats his bottom, telling him to go play.

 

She smiles at him. “Want to help with the dishes?”

 

“Sure.” He rises to join her at the sink, and bumps her with his hip. “So what was that about earlier?”

 

Abby flushes a little. “Huh?”

 

He grins down at her. “Abby, even when you were pregnant and...well, horny... all of the time, I don’t think you’ve ever jumped me like that.” He hurries on when her brow furrows. “I liked it. A lot. Just wondering where it came from, that’s all.”

 

Abby huffs out a breath and her lips twitch. “I wasn’t horny  _ all  _ the time.” She flips the water off and eyes him. “And I never once heard you complain.”

 

“Of course not. It was one of the greatest times of my life.” He sighs happily, making her snicker. Luka tilts her head back with a finger and stares into her eyes. “Hey. Tell me what’s going on.”

 

Abby smiles and steps over to peek into the living room to make sure Joe is occupied. She didn’t mind discussing their sex life, but their son didn’t need to hear it, regardless of how old he is. She steps back to the sink and starts scrubbing a pot to keep her hands busy. “I had a realization when I talked to Karen.”

 

Luka flips the water back on to rinse while she washes. “Oh?”

 

Abby shrugs, embarrassed and grateful at the same time. “You really do trust me again.”

 

He sighs and switches the water off again, leaning back on the counter. “Abby, I…” He shakes his head. “I never really  _ stopped  _ trusting you. What happened wasn’t  _ you _ . On some level I knew that the whole time.” He turns her to face him when she shakes her head at that. “Abby I’ve known and trusted you for nine years, almost ten, and you had  _ never _ broken my trust before and you haven’t since. A couple of months out of all those years? It doesn’t even rate on the scale.”

 

Abby opens her mouth, closes it again. Emotion threatening to overwhelm her. “But…”

 

Luka shakes his head. “It’s true.”

 

She steps into his arms. “You know what a hard time I have with trust.” She smiles when his lips brush the top of her head. “I want you to know I’ve never trusted  _ anyone  _ the way I trust you.” 

 

He smiles and kisses her softly. “I know.”

 

She pulls back to smile up at him. “Maybe there was a little more to it today.” Abby slips over to the sink again. 

 

Luka lifts a brow. “Yeah?”

 

“Yeah. Twice in a couple of days I kind of took hits from other women.” She pokes him in the chest when he opens his mouth. “I  _ know  _ neither one of them was your fault...especially Gretchen...but it made me a little possessive.” She shrugs. “And then I came in on you all sweaty and shirtless and...Jesus, Luka. You really have no idea how hot you are, do you?”

 

He rolls his eyes. “Abby….”

 

She snorts. “I  _ know  _ it’s ridiculous, okay? I just...I was reminding myself that you’re mine.”

 

Luka gives a baffled laugh and strokes a hand down her arm, lacing their fingers together. He lifts their joined hands to his lips. “I’m yours, baby. Always.”

 

Abby’s lips curve as he pulls her into his arms again. “Same goes.”

*********************************************

 

“Do you have any kids?”

 

Abby smiles at the young mother whose daughter she’s treating. “I do. A very sassy almost-three-year-old son.”

 

“That’s a great age. You probably don’t get to see him much.” The woman gives her a sad smile. “With being a doctor and all.”

 

Abby lifts a brow. “My husband and I are both doctors. We balance it very well. If I had my way I’d be able to see them both all of the time  _ and  _ still be able to work, but that’s not how life goes, is it?” She smiles sweetly.

 

“I’d never be able to work and leave my kids. Thank goodness my husband can provide for us all.” The woman prattles on, oblivious to Abby’s rising irritation.

 

“Well that’s nice for you, isn’t it? I’m glad everyone is allowed to make their own choices in life.” Abby restrains herself from smacking the woman with the chart. “Keep this splint dry, and keep an eye out for more discoloration. Any numbness or tingling happens, be sure to come back. Excuse me, I’ll send the nurse back with your discharge papers.” Abby winks at the little girl and heads out to admit.

 

“Hey Sophie? Can you take the papers and instructions back to exam four? If I go back in there, I might bitch-slap the mom and get myself arrested. Maybe fired.”

 

Sophie raises her brows. “Tough patient?”

 

“No, she’s fine. Hairline distal ulnar fracture. She was a trooper. Mom apparently thinks I should be home with my kid instead of working.”

 

“Oh. Well, wow? Does she realize what year it is?”

 

“Apparently not. I need coffee and a minute to settle down.”

 

Sophie takes the chart and goes to the computer to print out the discharge. “Go. I’ll try not to smack her myself.” 

 

Abby pushes into the lounge and stalks to the coffee machine. 

 

“Who pissed in your Cornflakes?” Dawn asks from the table behind her.

 

Abby gives a short laugh. “It’s nothing. I’m probably overreacting.” She shrugs. “That seems to be my wheelhouse lately. I’d say it was PMS, but well, it can’t be.” Abby lifts her cup in a toast. 

 

Dawn lifts a brow. “Do you want to bitch about it? Or just stew?”

 

“I want to bitch.” Abby sits at the table. “I love my kid more than anything. Except for maybe his dad.”

 

“Sure you do.”

 

“I also love my work. I’ve wanted to be a doctor for as long as I can remember. I took a few detours along the way, but I finally made it. I’m proud of that.”

 

“Well of course you are. You should be.”

 

“So why do I still feel guilty about having both? And why do patients think it’s okay to judge me for it?”

 

Dawn scowls. “Abby. There’s nothing wrong with having a family  _ and  _ a career. Anyone who thinks otherwise can take their eighteenth century bullshit and shove it. And I know it works the  _ other  _ way too. There are those who’ll look down on you for putting your family above career as well. Neither one of them is okay. Your worth as a doctor isn’t diminished because you’re a mom and a wife. Your worth as a mom and a wife isn’t diminished because you’re a doctor. Fuck that nonsense.”

 

Abby snorts. “Yeah.”

 

“Do you think Luka’s ever been asked why he’s working instead of staying home with your kid?” Dawn is getting worked up herself now. “Or told that he  _ should  _ be?”

 

“Of course not. He’s the man. I must have gotten knocked up all by myself. And you know, wouldn’t want the eye candy staying home instead of allowing others to ogle.” Abby grins. “Thanks. Your righteous indignation on my behalf is helpful.”

 

“Anytime.” Dawn huffs out a breath. “So what else are you overreacting about?”

 

Abby laughs. “Luka and I had a thing over the weekend. It was partially me overreacting and partially him being an oblivious idiot. It’s fine now. He groveled, and I seduced him in the middle of a workout.” She shrugs. “All good. He’s used to it anyways.”

 

“Being seduced while working out?” Dawn grins.

 

Abby laughs. “No, that was a first. He’s used to me overreacting. Just like I’m used to him being oblivious. This time just kind of boiled over.” 

 

“I see.”

 

“Yeah.” Abby finishes her coffee and sets the mug in the sink. “Really, thanks. I think I can finish the shift without committing murder now.”

 

“I’d post your bail. Probably.”

 

Abby grins at her and takes out her phone to text Luka. “Get Joe and meet me at Papa’s. See you.” His response of “Okay, it’s a date.” makes her smile. 

 

She would take her boys out for a nice dinner. Because Dawn was right. Fuck that nonsense. Abby was a wife and a mom  _ and  _ a doctor and she was damn good at all three. 

 


End file.
